Chapter 7
Severus lay propped up on the pillows, staring out the window. Hermione had been so kind as to push the bed up to the window so he could see out. He watched as small figures below were moving about on the lawn below. He could not tell from so far up what exactly it was that they were doing, and watched with mild curiosity. There were not many people, but they all seemed to be doing something.
After a while, his mind began to drift. He thought back over his life, and remembered all the best and worst times he had experienced.
He thought back to when he had been on the Hogwarts Express for the first time in his life, sitting with Lily Evans. The two boys, James Potter and Sirius Black, who were sitting in the compartment with them had been rude and teased him about wanting to be in Slytherin. Lily had come to his defence then, but that was before he called her a... well, he felt ashamed at his behaviour that day when he had been humiliated. It was that day that he had lost all hope of ever having a chance with her.
He also thought back to the night Lily was killed. Severus had felt the pain in his Dark Mark. He knew that something had happened. He knew that Voldemort had planned to go to the Potter residence, and all his pleading for Lily had been for nothing. Severus went immediately to Godric's Hollow, where the Dark Lord had told him he would be.
The house had been in ruin. Severus stood outside the house for several moments, not daring to believe that this was the house. He entered cautiously, because he had to know if it was her or not. He had walked down the passage, and through the doorway into the nursery, with the door blasted off its hinges. The first thing Severus saw, however, had been Lily. He knew she was dead, and fell to his knees, and took her up in his arms, cradling her against him, weeping. He had never felt pain like that before, and vowed then and there that his heart would always belong to her. He heard noises from below, and had no choice but to disappear.
Severus sighed. Those were painful memories that he did not want to revisit again. He turned his attention back to the figures moving below him. It looked to him like they were moving rocks, and could not understand why they would do such an odd task.
He heard a soft knocking on the door.
"Enter," he said. He hadn't noticed before how raspy his voice sounded. He didn't particularly like it. Hermione opened the door, and carried in a tray.
"I just thought you might be hungry, sir," she said. He thought that she was acting cautiously around him, as though he were fragile and might break at any moment. He hadn't thought about food, but now suddenly he realised that he hadn't eaten at all that day. He felt starving.
"Actually, I am rather hungry. What is on the menu for today?" he asked. He watched her carefully as she approached his bed, and put the food down on the bedside table. She pulled up the rickety chair, and sat next to him. He had never before noticed her looks. As she sat, he saw her hair, no longer bushy, but wavy instead, fall in front of her face. He watched her pull her fingers through her hair, and tie it loosely up.
She picked up a bowl off the tray, and showed it to him.
"Vegetable soup. I thought that it would be good for you to get some nutrients. I don't really want to see you waste away."
'How thoughtful,' he thought. "Sounds good to me Miss Granger." It certainly smelled good too.
"Professor, I have to, um... well feed you," she said shyly. It seemed to him that she was uncomfortable about the arrangement too. Good, he did not want her to take any pleasure out of this.
"What, do you think that the food will just jump into my mouth of its own accord, Miss Granger? Of course I need to be fed, as much as I hate to admit it," he said sullenly.
She nodded, and placed a napkin under his chin. 'If you think I am going to mess, you will be sorely mistaken,' he thought. She picked up the bowl of soup, and scooped up a spoon of the liquid inside. She brought it slowly to his mouth, careful not to mess, and he took the mouthful. The soup was hot, and tasted wonderful. He knew she had a point when she said he needed nutrients. He felt thin.
After a while of silent feeding, Hermione put the empty bowl back onto the tray. Severus felt really humiliated. He was not a small child, and yet his circumstances forced him to be fed like one. When she was done, she fixed the blanket, fixed the pillows behind his head so he was comfortable.
He resumed his watching of the small figures below, and after a moment said, "What are they doing down below there?"
She moved over to the window and looked out, silent for a long moment. He was struck by her beauty yet again as the rays of the setting sun made her face glow. He stared at her, and then caught himself and looked out the window.
"Those are the volunteers who are helping to rebuild the castle before term starts again. Harry and the other Heads of House decided to get straight to it during the summer holiday." She watched the people below for a moment with an almost sad look on her face. It was obvious that something bugged her.
"What is the matter?" he asked, his voice almost gentle. He surprised even himself, and he saw the look of near shock on her face.
"It's nothing to worry about. I don't want to burden you with my problems." She sighed and turned to leave the room. "I will be back tomorrow, and we can do some exercise for your limbs. I think you need it. Anyway, if you need something, just call. I can hear you from the next room. Good night sir." Before he could say anything she had left and closed the door behind her.
He watched the sun go down over the horizon, and thought how absolutely beautiful it was, the last rays of the sun lighting up the sky with pink and purple and gold. The natural lighting of the room had gone, and was replaced with darkness. Hermione had not lit any lamps while she had been there. Severus was okay with it though, because he felt absolutely exhausted anyway, and needed a good night's rest. He rested his head against the pillows, and closed his eyes, falling asleep very quickly.
His dreams were plagued with images of a snake, twenty feet high, rearing up and preparing to strike. He saw a deathly white face laughing at him in a high, evil cold laugh. The face hissed something and the snake lunged forward, biting him over and over and...
He was shaken awake, and was feeling disorientated. The room was still dark, and for a moment he thought the snake was still there. He looked around, panicked, and had broken into a cold sweat. Then a lamp was lit, and from the gentle glow he could see Hermione in her dressing gown, her hair tied up behind her head.
"Professor, are you ok?" she asked worriedly. Her face was pale in the dim light, and he could see the concern etched on her face.
"Yes, yes I am alright. It was just a dream. No need to worry about it." He took a deep breath. He did want to seem weak in front of her. She shook her head.
"I know what will help. My mother used to do this for me when I had nightmares. I'll be right back." She walked out of the room. He lay in the darkness, staring up at the ceiling, waiting.
On her return, she carried two mugs with her. She set them down on the bedside table. She propped him up on the pillows again, and took one of the mugs.
"Hot chocolate. I always find it helps calm the nerves a bit." She smiled, and he could see that it was a genuinely caring smile.
"Well, let's have it then," he said. He leaned his head forward so as to not spill any. She brought the cup up and gently tilted it forward, allowing him to sip the hot liquid. She put his mug down, and picked up her own.
"When I was small, my mother used to tell me a bedtime story to help me sleep. I won't do it, don't worry," she said, obviously seeing the horrified look on Severus' face. "What I am trying to say is that the talking helped. I always found it soothing."
He gave her a long searching look. He could see in her dark brown eyes that she was not making fun of him; she just wanted to make him feel better.
"Miss Granger, do you know how I arrived at St Mungo's? The last recollection I have before waking up is of being attacked," he said. This was something that had been bugging him. Someone had obviously saved him, because he had nearly died in the Shack. But he had no idea who would want to save him. It was something he had never expected of anyone.
She shifted uncomfortably on the edge of the bed where she sat. "I think... I think that is something you don't need to know at this moment. I will tell you, soon, but now is not the time." She picked up the mug for him again, and offered it to him. He took another sip. She seemed to be lost in thought as she helped him drink. After the mug was empty, she got up and made to leave.
"Miss Granger," said Severus. She stopped. "Thank you for the hot chocolate." She nodded and left. He was once again in the darkness. He looked out of the window into the dark grounds. He wondered at her reaction when he asked that question. There was obviously something she was not telling him. Now he was even more curious than before as to his mystery saviour.
A/N: To my dear readers. I just wanted to thank all those who have put my story on alert, or favorited, or reviewed. You all make me so very happy.
