Empty Skies
New Moon from Alice's POV
Disclaimer: You know the drill. It's all Stephenie Meyer's, not mine.
A/N: Thanks so much to CherryWolf713, merlins-most-dirty-pants, changeling007, CBRH, KiwiWitch, Nikkirenzo59, Edward'sPianoGirl, XxDoctoRxX, and edwardlover45 for the sweet reviews! Hope you like this chapter, too! I'm sorry if I'm making everybody sad (I'm used to torturing my characters, not my readers!), but New Moon is by no means a happy tale for anyone. I've had bits and pieces of this chapter written for awhile and really like the ending in an angsty, masochistic way…do you?
Chapter 7: Losing Him Too
The drive to Alaska was not a pleasant experience. At best uncomfortable, at worst agonizing, it seemed interminable.
Jasper and I rode with Carlisle and Esme in Carlisle's Mercedes while Rosalie and Emmett took Rosalie's car. Esme seemed dazed by the loss of the girl she had accepted as a daughter, gazing blankly out the window and murmuring occasionally about losing her children. Behind the wheel, Carlisle frowned at the road ahead, his mouth set in a grim line and one arm tight around Esme's shoulders. Overwhelmed by the emotions pent up in such a constricted space, Jasper spent much of the drive trying to hold himself and everyone else together.
When I could stand it no longer, I retreated into the future, hoping for solace and a glimmer of hope. Instead, I found myself watching Edward's agonizing choices, and Bella's growing panic at his distance.
When we finally arrived, we were welcomed hospitably by the Denali clan. We explained the situation as best we could. Days passed, one blurring into another; for us, the present and future all appeared the same.
In contrast, Edward and Bella's lives were turning upside down, and as I was so attuned to them both, I couldn't escape the constant visions. I watched him lie to her, telling her he didn't love her anymore. I watched her heart break and her reason for living drain painfully away. I watched him dither in her room, his CD and pictures in his hands, until he made up his mind and stowed them lovingly away under a loose floorboard. I watched him get into his car and drive away, keeping his eyes on the house of the girl he loved for as long as he could.
I was startled back to the present as Carlisle's phone rang. "Edward?"
"It's done," we heard Edward whisper on the other end of the connection. "I'm on my way."
Carlisle nodded unhappily. "Alright."
As another vision unfolded, I held out my hand for the phone.
"Edward," I said, trying to keep my voice impassive. That was so cruel, I wanted to scream. Do you have any idea what you've done to her? To yourself? To all of us? But instead I said, "She doesn't look good, Edward. I'm worried about her, I just saw—"
"Bella promised," he cut in, his voice harsh with repressed emotion. "Don't go looking for her future, either. We've done enough damage."
He hung up with a click. I stared at the silent phone in my hand for a moment, and then handed it back to Carlisle in a daze.
Edward arrived several hours later. Brushing past us, he managed to make it up the stairs and into his room before collapsing. The door slammed behind him with cruel finality.
Esme moaned, sinking to the floor. Jasper's face twisted, and took a breath to steady himself before sending out a wave of comfort. I wrapped an arm around him, wishing more than anything I could take his second-hand pain away.
Rosalie glared after Edward impatiently. "How long?" she demanded, turning to me.
We could only stare at her in disbelief.
For the rest of the week, Edward didn't come out of his room. On the whole, we tried to respect his grief and need for solitude, giving his room a wide berth and trying not to think about Bella. But some thoughts still slipped through, and I knew that behind the door, he was curled in a ball, submerged in his agony and trying to fight the temptation to go back to her.
I knew it was only a matter of time until he left, but I never guessed he might have a different destination in mind until I had a vision about a week after he joined us in Denali.
I walked into his room, not even bothering to knock; I knew he wouldn't respond anyway. He was stretched lengthwise on the sofa, somehow giving the unassuming piece of furniture the look of a torture device. I perched on the sofa's arm nearest his head.
He didn't acknowledge my presence.
I finally broke the silence. "When I first saw…I thought you were going back to her," I whispered sadly, watching him flinch.
He shook his head listlessly, face contorted against the pain.
"You're going to try to hunt Victoria, aren't you?"
He turned to me, the first flicker of interest in his eyes and he realized I could be some help on his desperate quest.
"I don't see you catching her. You've never tried tracking before and I think you're going to be awful at it."
He closed his eyes again.
"Take care of yourself, Edward," I whispered into the silence, not knowing if he heard. "I'll miss you."
He would be gone by daybreak.
