A/N: Okay guys, thank you so much for the best reviews in the world! They meant so much to me and I'm so glad you guys are enjoying it! Okay, this is Chapter 7 and my heart totally broke as I was writing so if you guys are emotional, this may be a tissue alert chapter! And I'm sure you guys will probably be mad at me for this chapter, but I felt it was necessary for the story…you never know what surprises I'll throw in for you guys! But I hope you enjoy this chapter and please once again review! I'll hopefully work on chapter 8 as soon as I can!! ENJOY!!
Four months had gone by. Kate had started working a week after Jack left. She had been depressed and spent majority of her time in bed, and Claire had made her get up and go back to work. Tom had welcomed her back, and she hardly was ever at her home. Everything reminded her of Jack so she began to throw herself into her work.
About the same time she had gone back to work, she had received a letter from Jack. He told her he was okay and where he was headed. He asked her not to write to him, but he said that he would call her someday.
So for the next four months that's how they communicated. He sent her letters and also tried calling her once a week. Jack told her that he was thinking about getting an email address so she'd be able to talk to him whenever she needed to, but he thought it might be too risky.
All of their calls lasted no longer than five minutes, even though Jack called on a secure line, he still felt insecure. That was what her life consisted of…waiting to hear anything from Jack.
Little did Jack know that Kate was also pregnant with his child. She had found out she was pregnant about a month after Jack had left. Everyone was quite surprised to find Kate pregnant, but they didn't question her. They all knew she wanted a family and that she had wanted to try other means of conception besides having a husband. She didn't tell Jack. She knew that if he knew about the baby, he'd come back to her and get caught. She'd rather him not know at all. Maybe she would tell him as soon as she was born. Every night Kate would have dreams about she and Jack and also the baby growing inside of her. She saw their family and loved every minute of it. She knew how great a dad Jack would be…someday.
Suddenly a knock interrupted her thoughts. She struggled to get up. Her first months of pregnancy had been rough on her, without having Jack there to support her. The morning sickness had been almost unbearable. Now that the morning sickness was over, Kate ate everything in sight. Her cravings were unbelievable. In the middle of the night she'd wake up and have a craving for onions and jello or some other obnoxious food grouping. She had gained some weight over that month following the sickness, and her bump had started growing.
Kate made her way to the door, wondering who it could possibly be. At first she didn't recognize who was standing in front of her. Suddenly, she gasped as she realized it was Jack. She stood there mesmerized before she flew for the door and threw her arms around him.
"What are you doing here?" Kate asked as she pulled Jack inside and closed the door.
"I just couldn't take not seeing you anymore. You are beautiful," Jack said as he touched the side of her face gently.
"Here, sit down," Kate said as Jack took off his wig. For the first time, Kate had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. He was here, he had come back for her, and she suddenly felt obligated to tell him about the baby, but somehow she felt she couldn't. If she did, Jack would want to stay with her, and as much as she wanted him to stay, she knew he couldn't. If she wanted Jack to stay safe, she couldn't risk telling him.
"How are you?" Jack asked.
"I'm good. I've missed you. Are you okay?" Kate asked.
"I couldn't stop thinking about you. I missed you so much. I had to come back to you."
"I'm so glad that you did," Kate said as she leaned closer to Jack.
Their lips met for the first time in four months, and both of them deeply responded to the kiss. Their hands roamed and explored each other, and Kate began to feel guilty. She felt she needed to tell Jack. Not to mention, if she let it get too far, he'd find out anyway.
Jack slid his hands up the back of Kate's sweatshirt. She groaned for him to continue. Just as Jack was moving his hand to Kate's stomach, she stopped him.
"Jack, I can't," Kate said as she grabbed both of his hands and leaned her forehead against his.
"What's wrong? Did I hurt you?" he asked.
"No, no. of course not. I just…I don't think we should."
"Are you okay, Kate? You seem…I don't know."
"Jack, I have something to tell you. And please, don't freak out," Kate said nervously as she grabbed Jack's hands tightly.
"Kate, can you tell me anything. What is it?"
Kate had a hard time looking him in the eye, but it was now or never. She took a deep breath and looked Jack in the eye.
"I'm pregnant, Jack," she said as tears stung her eyes.
"What?" he asked, a joyous look spreading across his face.
"Jack, its…" Kate was cut off by Jack sweeping her up into his arms and planting a kiss to the sides of her face. She didn't know quite how to react. He knew, but she still knew she had to protect him.
"Are you okay?" Jack asked nervously as he released Kate from his grasp and looked at her lovingly, and Kate could only think of one thing to do. Lie to Jack.
"Jack, you don't understand. The baby it…it's not yours," Kate lied. The tears flowed from her eyes when she saw Jack's sad expression.
"What? Kate, I … I don't understand."
"After you left, it was … it was a mistake. It wasn't anything you did Jack, not at all. It was me. I got lonely and I … I didn't mean for it to happen."
"You slept with someone else?" Jack asked unbelieving as he turned away from her and ran a hand through his short hair.
"It wasn't like that Jack, please…believe me. I never meant to hurt you," Kate explained as she pleaded with Jack. She didn't want him to think there had been anyone else, but she needed him to understand that she had to push him away to save him.
"Okay. It's okay, I still…I still want to be there for you. Anything you need, I'll be right here for you," Jack said as he stroked the side of her cheeks. "Okay, we'll do this together. "I will be here beside you no matter what, I promise. I love you, Kate," Jack said and Kate let out a deep breath as he kissed her forehead.
Kate took a few more deep breaths as her tears continued to fall. She tried to compose herself before she spoke again. "Jack, you need to trust me. I love you, but you can't stay."
"No, I don't care. I'll stay, no matter what the consequences."
"I can't let you stay, Jack. I can do this on my own. I'm sorry, but I don't want or need you here. You don't need to risk it for me."
"What are you saying Kate? You don't want to be with me?" Jack asked and Kate could see Jack crumbling right in front of her. Little did he know that what she was saying was breaking her heart as well, but in the end as long as Jack was safe she didn't care. Her world was crashing around her as she pushed Jack away.
"I'm saying that I don't want you to stay, Jack," she said as she held back her threatening tears. She couldn't believe what she was saying. She wanted nothing more than to be with Jack forever, but she couldn't risk losing him either.
"Fine, if that's what you want. I guess it was a mistake to come back here," Jack said as he stood up and started for her door. "I hope you're happy, Kate."
Kate sat there stunned as the tears fell down her face. Before Jack turned the door knob she quickly called out, "Jack, can we still write? Please, I just…I don't want to lose you as a friend. I don't want to lose you."
"Sure, Kate. I'll write to you. As long as you need me to."
She watched as the love of her life walked out the door. She hadn't realized just how much she loved Jack until she had sacrificed her own happiness for his safety and he walked out of her life. She couldn't imagine a life without him in it, and she thought that hopefully one day Jack would understand what she had done for him.
