They gonna clean up your looks
with all the lies in the books
to make a citizen out of you.
Because they sleep with a gun
and keep an eye on you son
so they can watch all the things you do.

- - -

The tall brunette girl looked shyly at the tallest Moop member and said, "I was wondering... since you're the lead singer, how come you don't always have spreads in magazines ands stuff?"

Cartman blinked and then coughed, "Well, you see, I-" Kyle interrupted him, "Because nobody cares enough about him to read a magazine article on him.

Cartman saw red, "Shut the fuck up, Jew! You don't know anything!"

It was a Tuesday and the boys had to spend their entire free day with some girl who had won a contest. Lame. The girl's interest seemed to be piked and she said, "Why do you guys pick on him so much?"

Stan smiled and said, "Well, Diane, it all started when we were in preschool..."

- - -

The next day, headlines all over the world read,

ERIC CARTMAN!

NAZI, RACIST AND MURDERER?

What you didn't know about America's leading man!

Cartman put his heads in his hands and mumbled, "Aw, weak..."

Kyle smirked, "Serves you right, fatass."

- - -

A/N: PLEASE READ!!!

I was super busy today and couldn't find time to sit down and properly write anything. PLEASE FORGIVE ME!

It's now 11:30PM and I just finished writing this.

Please don't review too harshly.

Better something than nothing right?

I'm proud of myself for updating every day for a week, but I'm still scared of huge commitments. Argh.

Review. :3

Teenagers - My Chemical Romace