Greetings my fellow motherhopers! I'm back from Cancun! From the warm, humid beach-side to the cold, dry American winter... I'm lovin' it! Now, I know you all missed me, so I'm cranking out another chappy for you! In this chapter you will find that the dead line is fast approaching but that doesn't mean everything's SO rushed our favorite cooks don't have time for some flirting, threats and a flying Chowder!

As I head out to destroy another city, alls CJzilla roars is this: R&R MOTHERHOPERS! You know I don't care if you flame or fluff!


Everything was on schedule and running smoothly. Most of the baking good were in the ovens all ready. Candy, while watching a batch of her pound cake bake was talking with Chowder. The kitten was just twisting his mop near the southern cook, listening intently on what she was saying.

"An' that's where babies come from," Candy concluded leaning up on her pound cake peel.

Chowder stood there with his mouth wide open.

"So what you're saying is… I was once a … pot roast…-" the kitten surmised, his eyes wide. "And when my mommy ate it, the pot roast hatched into me?"

Candy knelt down next to the kitten, placing a reassuring hand on Chowder's shoulder.

"That's right," the southern cook replied, face as straight as a board. "Now this knowledge is very top secret Chowder hon', that's why adults tell y'all to leave the room when they talk'bout it."

Chowder nodded, getting TWO explanations for the price of one. Candy smiled at him.

"Now get outta here before Mung gets mad at ya!" the southern cook spun Chowder and gave him a friendly push to get him going.

Candy smiled ear to ear as she watched the kid walk away with a pensive look on his face and a mop in his hand.

"Sweet lil' thing," the southern cook chuckled to herself and turned back to the ovens.

She gasped when she saw Schnitzel standing right next to her.

"Y'all wanna give me a heart attack?!" Candy said angrily as she held her chest.

The southern cook opened one of the ovens and poked at a pound cake with her peel.

"It's a livin' wonder why Auntie Truffles and Uncle Mung are still alive with y'all sneakin' around the kitchen!" Candy huffed, shutting the oven door.

Schnitzel's lip curled into a small, small grin.

"Radda radda ra-ra," the soui chef pointed to an oven down from Candy's pound cake.

Candy looked back over at Schnitzel and stuck out her tongue.

"Check the sweet potato pies ya-self!" she gestured. "I'm watchin' my pound cake."

Schnitzel rolled his eyes. All Schnitzel wanted to do was get by her.

"Radda," he repeated.

Candy pursed her lips.

"Say "please"," the southern cook returned.

""Radda"," the soui chef replied unexcitedly.

"Say "please, darlin'"," she went on.

The soui chef pinched the brim of his nose, feeling a headache coming on.

""Radda ra"," Schnitzel followed, getting annoyed.

Schnitzel quirked a brow at the cook. Candy giggled, a mischievous smile coming to her face.

"Say "please, good lookin'"," Candy didn't even blink.

Schnitzel felt his face getting hot.

""Radda radda ra"," he strained and pointed to one of the ovens. "Radda radda rad?"

Candy giggled and sidestepped.

"Light'n up Schnowder," the southern cook told him as he passed.

Schnitzel was just about to roll his eyes when he felt Candy spank him across his rear. The soui chef jumped, doing a 360˚ spin. Schnitzel clapped his hands on his backside, starring with wide eyes at Candy like she'd just spanked him… oh, wait…

"Radda radda?!" Schnitzel barked.

Candy simply leaned on the counter, with a wily leer on her face.

"Just light'n up," the southern cook repeated innocently. "Y'all get any more serious Schnowder, an' y'all… I dunno, explode or somethin'!"

Schnitzel snorted, holding his eyes to hers for a long moment. Then the soui chef grumbled, turned on his heel and faced the oven with the sweet potato pie. Sticking his head into the oven to check on the baking desserts, he didn't feel the artificial heat since his face was all ready on fire from a flaming-hot flush.

But it wasn't until he knew Candy wasn't looking that Schnitzel let a grin go.

"All right gang!" Mung's voice rang out through the kitchen over the clanking dishware and roaring appliances. "We got fifteen more minuets! I repeat! The big 1… 5…! Fifteen!"

Schnitzel looked up from his oven, whipping his brow free of sweat. Candy glanced up from her mixer and Chowder stopped sweeping up a dish that had broken on the floor.

"Status report team!" the head chef called out.

Chowder saluted.

"I have dish pan-hands SIR!" the kitten puffed out his chest, standing at military attention as Mung walked by.

"Great!" the executive chef wasn't really paying attention to Chowder, but the kitten didn't even notice. "Schnitzel what's your report?"

The soui chef looked dead on his feet, sweating like a sun-bathing Sasquatch next to the ovens.

"Radda radda r-radda," Schnitzel answered glancing at the crowded oven.

Mung tossed a concerned eye at the sweet potato pie inside the oven.

"Give it four more minuets and drop the temperature Schnitzel," the head chef had a serious moment. "Candy! What have you got to say?"

Candy looked over her shoulder at her step-uncle, her pink swirled hair looking like a scoop of melting Thrice Cream.

"The pound cake glaze is workin' together right now Uncle Mung," the southern cook told him. "The cakes are done."

The head chef nodded in approval.

"How 'bout you honey?!" Mung called across the room to his wife.

Truffles was in the thick of battle with plastic wrap as she covered the all ready cooked dishes.

"I hate you! You know that?!" the hostess barked back at her husband.

"Love you too baby!" Mung wasn't listening as his wife shrink-wrapped herself. "Remember gang that the cooking HAS to be done in fifteen minuets! So like your life depends on it!"

Then the executive chef paused for a moment.

"And just so you know…" Mung smiled sweetly before yanking out a egg beater and continuing in a menacing voice, "YOUR lives DO depend on it! IF Y'ALL DON'T FINISH ON TIME, I'LL TURN THIS BABY ON AND TANGLE YOUR HAIR SO BAD, YOU'LL HAVE TO SHAVE YOUR HEAD!!!!!"

A fearful silence cut through the kitchen as Candy, Chowder and Schnitzel starred at the head chef. Mung glare at them all, double fisting on his egg breater.

"What are you looking at me for?" the executive chef snarled, his eyes narrowed. "COOK!"

The two cooks and apprentice zipped back to work under the ominous glare of the psycho head chef. Candy leaned over to Chowder who was feverishly sweeping the floor around her feet.

"Mung wouldn't...?" the southern chef asked discreetly.

Chowder looked up at her, swaying his broom back and forth.

"Before I became Mung Daal's apprentice," the kitten whispered, "there was another kid who worked for him. Schnitzel told me that one day the kid slacked off and left one dirty pan in the sink… No one ever saw him again. I think Mung held him down while Truffles tied him up-"

"CHOWDER!" Mung blasted from behind the kitten. "Get back to sweeping!!"

Candy and Chowder jumped. Chowder zealously began sweeping again.

"I'M SWEEPIN' MUNG! OH DEAR GRAPES, I'M SWEEPING!" the kitten ran around in a panic as he swept the floor.

Mung shot Candy a punishing glare before turning on the beater. The southern girl got back to her mixer. The executive chef hovered around the kitchen like a prison warden, bouncing his egg beater in his hand. For the remaining fifteen minuets, Mung was gonna get every last ounce of cooking out of his team.

"Five… Four… Three… Two… One… TIME!" Mung shouted as he counted down to the fifteen minuet mark. "Cooks, time's up! Drop yer spoons and step away from what you are doing!"

The two cooks stopped their cooking at Mung's word and Chowder even dropped his broom and held up his hands. The executive chef bounced over to Candy and Schnitzel.

"Radda radda radda?" Schnitzel panted, whipping his forehead.

Mung stopped, scratching his chin.

"Well, I am a fan of those food challenge shows," the head chef mused. "And as executive chef here at Mung Daal's catering service, I am entitled to set a time limit on my kitchen!"

Mung folded his arms defiantly.

"Radda ra?" Schnitzel cocked a brow.

"YES I gotta count it down!" Mung returned. "And if you keep mouthing off to me, we're gonna do this every day!"

The soui chef rolled his eyes but Mung seemed to not notice anything.

"All right," the head chef looked over the finished dishes. "Everything looks finished! Good job everyone! The hard part is over! Woo!"

He threw his hands in the air.

"All that's left to do is pack it up, and we'll finish the rest at the conventions site!" the executive chef did a happy dance.

Schnitzel gave him a glare while Candy stood dead on her feet, starring off into nothingness.

"Ra-radda?" the soui chef almost scowled.

"Yeah, yeah take five," Mung swatted the air. "Take five everyone! …Even you Truffles!"

Truffles' screams were muffled because of the plastic wrap covering her mouth, head and pretty much everything else on her body beside her nose. Mung, Chowder and Schnitzel starred over at the shrink-wrapped Mushroom Pixie, like it was the norm.

"Radda," Schnitzel sighed and plodded over to a bench to sit.

Mung stepped over to Candy. The southern cook was asleep on her feet again. The executive chef raised a finger to poke her, but Mung too knew what happens to Candy when you scare her.

"Oh Chowder," Mung looked down at his apprentice with a nice smile. "Why don't you poke Candy and make sure she's still alive?"

"But you're right next to her! You've got your finger out and everything!" Chowder returned innocently.

Mung looked between Chowder and his finger.

"Uh… No it's not!" the head chef floundered for an answer, before shoving his finger up his nose. "See! My finger's busy and I cannot poke Candy."

Chowder made a face when he saw chef's finger fishing around in his nose.

"You got another hand! Use that one!" the kitten pointed out.

Mung took his other index finger and put it in his ear.

"Both of my hands are busy!" Mung exclaimed. "It's up to you to poke Candy."

"But-!" Chowder began.

But before he could say anything else, Mung stuffed one of his feet in his mouth and sat on his other foot. Now Chowder had no choice. Shrugging, the kitten walked up to Candy, raised his index finger and poked the southern cook on the arm.

From across the room and on a bench, Schnitzel was snapped out of the haze of sleep when he heard Candy shriek. Opening his eyes Schnitzel saw Candy smack Chowder and the kitten fly through the air right toward him.

"Radda," Schnitzel sighed as he saw Chowder's mouth open.

In a second, the soui chef's head was inside the kitten's bottomless mouth. Schnitzel pulled Chowder off of his head and set him down on the floor. A ripple of absolute disgust went over the soui chef's body as he whipped his face free of Chowder's saliva.

"OooooOOOoooH!" Schnitzel groaned, shaking off Chowder's saliva and picking off all-ready-been-chewed remnants of food.

Chowder smacked his lips, the taste of Schnitzel's head still in his mouth.

"You taste like peanut-butter, barbecue sauce, flour, grapefruit juice and slomatos," the kitten pointed out, licking his lips. "Not necessarily in that order."

"Radda radda rad-rad-ra-radda?!" the soui chef barked.

Chowder looked offended and set his hands on his hips.

"I do SO brush my teeth!" the kitten returned, his head swiveling with attitude. "Maybe YOU should shower once in a while!"

Candy then walked over to the two of them, rubbing her tired eyes.

"Sorry Chowder hon'," the southern cook yawned. "Is you a'right?"

The kitten was twisting a finger between one of his teeth and pulled out one of Schnitzel's hairs.

"Great!" Chowder declared angrily, hands in the air. "Now I got the taste of Schnitzel in my mouth! Gross! I'm gonna go lick a doorknob to get the nasty taste out of my mouth!"

Chowder walked off gagging. Candy looked over at Schnitzel with a smile.

"Radda radda," the soui chef pointed at the southern cook with narrowed eyes.

Candy merely grinned as she took a seat next to him.

"I don't mean to nearly kill y'all Schnowder," she said sweetly. "It just happens."

The southern cook looked over at the soui chef with big, glittering blue eyes. Schnitzel blinked at Candy before giving a tiny, tiny besotted grin. The southern cook beamed at him before she yawned. Candy put her head on Schnitzel's shoulder before closing her eyes. The soui chef went straight as a board before he started to sweat. But before long, the two cooks began drifting off into a well deserved visit to Candyland… But just for a moment.

"HEY!" Mung shouted, spraying the two cooks with his squirt bottle. "HOOLIGANS! NONE OF THAT IN THE KITCHEN!"

And Schnitzel and Candy were drenched with water.


I'm so sick of the no "Tab" setting these fanfiction layouts have. If I was a third-person reader, I wouldn't be able to tell where the paragraphs start and end! Sheesh! My monster frustration aside, please... R&R!