This chapter is pretty much a recap of what's already happened, hopefully to make things a little less confusing.

"I've gathered you all here today, because one of you is responsible for the four heinous crimes that have shocked the zoo," Doris announced. Everyone was gathered in the zoovenire shop as per Doris' request, "The first murder, was committed by Skipper. He was the only one who'd have access to the weapons necessary to carry out the crime without the rest of the team knowing. He was also furious at Pinkie for having stolen their fish and replaced them with fishcakes. If you've never gone two weeks without adequate food, then you'll obviously have no idea how much you'd hate the person who put you in that situation, but it's a lot. Not enough to kill, but then I always had doubts about that particular penguin's sanity. I should know, I was his…"

"Can we move on to the second murder now?" Roy asked irritably.

"It was a crime of passion," Doris explained, "Skipper was the last person to see her alive. They were having dinner together; it was only natural that she'd start the washing up afterwards. Of course they'd continue to talk, and if would be easier for her to tell him she was in love with another when she didn't have to make eye contact. Skipper gets angry. Marlene tries to protect herself. Well, we all know that if she had a flamethrower handy it would still be no match for Skipper."

"But what about the manhole?" Mason asked. Nigel had to return to England for business reasons, but Mason knew his methods.

"Skipper was blocking the only other way out, and if Skipper was there, then the others would be at the HQ."

"But Skipper would have gotten back by the time she crawled through the sewers getting her wound infected?"

"Yes, but if he was going to protect his alibi, he'd have to pretend to help stabilise her and try again before she could talk. All she'd have to do is keep Rico."

"Doris," Kowalski commented, earning him a scowl, "they were never officially an item."

"Couldn't you feel the romance in the air?" Darla swooned. Kowalski and Rico looked at each other and shrugged.

"Not really." The scientist replied.

"Boys." The baboons muttered.

"Anyway," Kowalski continued, "why would Marlene break up with him even if they were a couple?"

"I was wondering when someone was going to ask that," Doris grinned, "Anyone notice how much time Private had been spending around Marlene?"

"She was helping me out with my cross stich," Private defended, "Skippah didn't like me having needles in the HQ."

"Hmph," Doris scoffed, "a likely story. Well, Marlene hadn't wanted to tell Skipper her heart belonged to someone else until she found the dart. Of course she put two and two together, and realised it was Skipper. That was the final straw, but being the kind, sensitive woman everyone has said she was, I only saw her from a distance I never actually spoke to her, she tried to tell Skipper gently, which was her fatal mistake. I can further prove my theory by pointing out Blowhole's latest statement that injuries sustained by Marlene were consistent with those of a skilled fighter, like Skipper.

"Now, you are doubtlessly wondering just how Skipper ended up dead. It's quite simple. If somebody killed the love of your life, and you knew quite obviously who it was because only a few hours before Marlene had told you she was finally going to tell skipper the truth, what would you do? Well if you're also thinking 'there was no way young, naïve private could do that', remember what that same 'young, naïve Private' was capable of under the effects of the love-u-laser, yes Kowalski, I know all about that, which would be about half the level of hatred Private would be feeling after Marlene's death. Now, as Skipper didn't know Private knew, when Private walked up to him in the park and asked him if they could speak in, he followed. Now, caught completely off guard, Private would be able to knock Skipper out and restrain him in some separate location as there were still questions he needed answers to before he could end him.

"The phone call Fred received in the park said Skipper requested a freeze ray, and strangely enough, Skipper was killed by one. Now, the voice on the phone was a woman's voice I didn't recognise, which would mean, within the zoo, it could only be one of five people: Marlene, Rhonda, Stacy, Becky, and Miss Perky. Marlene is dead, Rhonda is with my brother, Stacy and Becky would be glad to see Marlene dead, and Miss Perky can only say set phrases."

"You do realise you've just ruled out all your own suspects?" Mason commented dryly.

"I know. So it had to be someone outside the zoo. But who? What about Private's ex, Cupid? Now, if Private asked Cupid to request Kowalski's freeze ray pretending it was for Skipper, it would be far less suspicious than if Private requested it himself or tried to steal it."

"But why would Skipper or Private kill Julian?" Kowalski asked.

"Simple. They didn't. They couldn't of, Private was busy watching his prisoner, and Skipper was, well, the prisoner being watched. The only other person who could have motive to kill Julian was Maurice."

"One minute, young lady," Mason objected, standing up and walking to the front of the group, "there are a few flaws in this story: Cupid has a distinct Russian accent. You'd recognise it, yet if as you say the voice could have belonged to anyone from Rhonda to Marlene, then the speaker couldn't have been her."

"She could have changed her voice."

"Unlikely. Alright, answer this: how could Private be guarding his prisoner if he was seen walking about the zoo?"

"Well he had to take a break some time." Doris replied.

"See how flimsy her theory is?" Mason announced, "Pure guess work and evenings reading bad romance novels. "Now to me, it all seems rather premeditated. I personally think they're some sort of psychopathic killer on the loose. That one of us snapped and…"

"Absolutely ridiculous," Burt objected.

"What do you think Doris, being an expert on the subject?" Mason asked.

"Not funny, Mason," Doris countered, "My brother is just slightly misguided."

"He wants to destroy the sun and by extension all life on earth."

"That's just a rumour."

"Anyway, the killer's pattern as my esteemed colleague Nigel may have told you is to kill the victim in the method opposite to their personality. Now, the victims were not chosen at random, not at all. Pinkie was a less than trustworthy member of the community; Skipper was the zoo's self-proclaimed law enforcement. Julian was, and I hate to speak ill of the dead, a nuisance, and Marlene was the quintessence of the good citizen. The murder was also planning several steps ahead. In Marlene's habitat Skipper's blood was on the knife, skipper was the next victim. In Pinkie's death, a sketch of Marlene was found amongst the debris."

"Well of course there was a sketch of Marlene," Doris interrupted, "It was skipper's plane. He probably drew it while he was waiting for refuelling to finish."

"Anyhow, I have had psychological profiles drawn up by Dr Blowhole, and the one most likely to snap, would be Private. The effort to be good all the time, as well as the stress from his severe break up with Shauna, in which he was so desperate to keep their relationship together he resorted to purposely inflicting horrific injuries on himself."

"Mason, Doris, both your theories are completely ridiculous," Kowalski objected, "Private would never do such a thing."

"I, um…" Private tried to add.

"Furthermore, I doubt that testimony by someone actively trying to destroy this team, which incriminates a member of the team, should be taken seriously…"

"Um, K'walski, I have a theory."

"Sorry Private," Kowalski motioned with a wing for the nervous boy to take centre stage, "Please explain your theory."

"Well, I agreed with what Skipper was saying before he disappeared," Private announced, slowly warming to being in front of an audience, "I think that somebody killed Pinkie as a personal revenge, possibly due to the fish. Then, after Marlene found the dart, she figured out who the killer was. Marlene confronted the killer, and she had to be killed to keep her from talking. Then, when Skipper started to get onto the right trail, he had to be killed before he announced whatever he found."

"What about Julian?" Doris asked.

"Julian was always popping in and out of the HQ raiding our fridge. He might have found some of Skipper's notes."

"That does sound convincing," Lulu whispered.

"Pretty close to my theory," Kowalski replied in equally hushed tones, watching as the three detectives argued over trivial details, Private looking more and more uncomfortable.

"So what do you think?"

"I fear revenge was Skipper's motive for ordering us to kill Pinkie," Kowalski answered, "I agree with Private about the motive for the second murder: the killer, or as we had learned from Shelly, someone close to the killer had to shut her up."

"What about Skipper?"

"He was the only one who would be able to confirm we were acting under his orders, even though he said he wouldn't. He'd also know if one of us went off reservation and killed his girlfriend, who it was. So he had to go."

"But why would they want to prevent Skipper from saying we were acting under orders?"

"It's my scapegoat theory. One of us panicked after Pinkie and Marlene's murders. They tried to set another one of us up and apparently failed."

"But why not frame Skipper again like we tried before?"

"Because even if it was revealed it was a mission there would still be a decent chance the zoo would be angry at us anyway for agreeing to such a mission."

"You seem to know a lot about this killer, Kowalski. Are you sure it wasn't you?"

"I resent that statement, Lulu. If it had been me setting things up, it would have worked."

"Well Private, you've backed yourself into a corner," Mason announced triumphantly, "Unlike our theories, you've failed to produce any facts, and anyway, it's two against one."

"I hope when we try you for four murders you'll be able to think of some better excuses," Doris added, getting quite a reaction from the crowd, "Otherwise you might just have to encounter justice."

It was then the severity of the situation hit Kowalski full in the face. Little Private was going to be convicted of crimes that only occurred because he'd started some kind of bizarre chain reaction, and one crime that actually was his. He looked around the zoo. He could tell from the angry shouts there was no reasoning with them. All that was missing from the picture were the pitchforks and burning effigies. Kowalski groaned. Great, everything was going the way of the Salem witch trials. Well, there was only one thing for it.

"Wait," Kowalski objected, standing up, "It was me. I confess."