Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

A/N: Sooo I'm not dead! Ya i'm terrible at updating ya'll probably thought I was dead. Well I hope you like this chapter. Also I saw Endgame and I sobbed, It was soooo good! Hopefully my story is flowing bc I have no clue.

Chapter name: I found by Amber Run


Chapter Seven-I Found

Hermione's point of view

"If we're going to be friends we need to have a few rules." I said walking through the fourth floor. It was me and Draco's turn as prefects to do rounds. It was late on New Years eve. We hadn't done much after Christmas, we would sometimes meet up in the library but that was it. I wouldn't say being friends with Draco was a piece of cake. We have fought many times, which either lead to him freaking out or me storming away. Overall Draco was getting a bit better with his panic attacks, but like they always say, it gets better before it gets worse.

"Ok, like what?" He asked tilting his head.

"Like you need to refrain from calling me Mudblood." He squinted his eyes as if to say 'I don't think I can do that'. "At least not to my face." He nodded. I know that he doesn't believe-or at the very least, not all of it- that 'Mudbloods' are disgusting creature that are meant to die, but it still doesn't feel great.

I remember when he first called me it, the Slytherin and Gryffindor teams were fighting over who got to use the quiddtich pitch to practice. The Slytherins said they had to train their new seaker, Draco. Draco had turned to Ron and said that his father could afford the best, unlike the Weasley's who struggle whenever it comes to money. I had then stepped in and said that at least the Gryffindors didn't have to buy their way on the team, they got in on pure talent. Malfoy was furious, or as furious as a twelve year old could get. He got up in my face and snarled, "No one asked your opinion, you filthy little Mudblood." I was devastated yet not surprised, I knew he was prejudice but I didn't think anyone still used that word. I cried all night that night, because I cared what he thought about me. I don't know why but I did.

We rounded a corner that led outside. The sky would have been pitch black if it wasn't for the bright stars. Over to the right was a small lake that had frozen over. There was a bench next to it that me and Draco silently walked over to. It was weird, because thinking about sitting here with Draco Malfoy of all people a month ago would have been crazy. But look at us now! Two broken people sitting together watching the snowfall on New Years Eve. He wasn't bad company, he typically just sat in silence and stared off into the distance. I watched as the snow lightly landed on Draco, he paid no attention just kept his eyes trained on the frozen lake.

"Hey, have you ever gone ice skating?" I asked him. He turned quickly and narrowed his eyes.

"Do I look like a muggle?" He asked, not quit in a harsh tone but bordering on one. I gave him a look and he quickly muttered a sorry. I stood up and took his hand. I pulled his tall frame to the lake and pulled out my wand. I noticed that he flinched when he saw the wooden stick but I refarmed from giving him a look of pity. I quickly cast a spell to give us both ice skates.

I circled around him and tried to show him how to skate. He tried to move but quickly fell. I giggled and reached my hand down to help him up, but all he did was pull me down with him. We were now both laughing on the ice.

"Here i'll help you." I finally said. I carefully stood up and took his hand and pulled him up. I pulled him around and he slowly began to get the hang of it. We twirled around on the ice-occasionally falling- for what felt like forever.

A ring went through the entire courtyard and castle signaling that it was midnight-the new year. Me and Draco froze. I noticed that me and Draco were close but the proximity never occurred to me before. I looked into his stormy grey eyes that held so much emotion yet none at all. It's like looking at one of those abstract paintings, there is always so much to look at yet when you really think about it it's just a bunch of shapes and splatters of paint. Draco holds so much to look at in his eyes yet is broken down by life.

My eyes traveled along all his facial features, his button but somehow pointed nose with a small scar indicating where I had punched him in third year, his flushed cheeks from the cold, and the way his nearly white hair fell across his forehead. Finally my eyes traveled to his lips which were slightly separate and pale. Without really thinking I stood as tall as I could with skates on and put my lips against his. He stiffened but I didn't stop. It was different than my kiss with Krum, this was slow and sweet. Then I felt shaky hand wrap around my waist. I pulled away and nodded, then I lifted my arms and put them over his shoulders and went back to kissing his soft cold lips. This time he kissed back.

It wasn't like we were making out. No, this was better it was like we understood each other. Neither of us knew what was happening but we didn't want to stop. He pulled me closer like he was afraid I was going to turn to dust or evaporate. If I was being honest with myself I wasn't sure what was happening. I didn't feel anything towards Draco romantically, but yet we were standing on a frozen lake kissing. But the more I thought about it I thought there was one thing I felt toward him that was probably more intense than a simple crush, I felt like I needed him. I felt as though no one understood me before, like no one could comprehend the things I was feeling but him.

Without trying to stop it I immediately started crying. He pulled away and looked me in the eyes trying to understand why I was crying. But I could never explain all the emotion that I felt at that moment. So I just shook my head and hugged him. I cried into his shoulder and he rubbed circles around my back in a comforting way. Why was I crying at a moment like this? I was supposed to be happy! But all the thoughts of war, and us being on opposites sides of it crept into my mind and tore threw my brain. They were unwelcome thoughts, ones that tainted the happy memories, that slaughter the people I care about. I tried to push those thoughts out of my head but they kept tearing through.

"Hermione what's wrong?" Draco asked in a quiet voice. I just cried harder. Draco pulled me over to the bench and we both sat. I slowly began to calm down. My breathing began to even out and the flow of tears eventually stopped. I stared down at my feet which still had the skates on. Draco held his hands in front of him fidgeting.

"I'm I really that bad a kisser?" He asked in a joking way, trying to break the now uncomfortable silence. I laughed but it was dry.

"No. On the contrary, you're quite a good kisser." I said. I glanced up at him to see his face bright pink. I smiled at that. The walls he had up are slowly coming down.

"Oh." Was all he said. I knew he wanted to ask why I was crying but he was scared.

"I was thinking about war. I didn't mean to but I can't help it! Lately all I can think about is war and what's going to happen. People are going to die Draco! And I can't do anything about it!" I said my voice rising.

"I know. I've been thinking about it too. I'm scared Hermione. I'm so so sacred. My father is going to make me help Voldemort and I can't do anything about it. Because if I say no he'll kill me." He said vice shaking.

"I'm sorry Draco I know this must be really hard on you but I promise you won't have to go with him again." He looked at me but only looked sad. We sat there and unlike normal people we didn't need to talk about our kiss because that's just what it was, a kiss. Ok maybe more than one kiss, but still. Later we will most definitely talk about it but for now we are both so confused and scared we don't know what to say.

"Ron and Harry will be back soon." I said watching his face. "We won't be able to be seen around together, Harry and Ron won't understand." He nodded understandably.

"I really do hate them." I gave him a stern look but he only shrugged.

"We could meet in the Room of Requirement?" I suggested.

"Yeah that could work. And we have Prefect duties so we can talk then as well." He answered. I nodded, it was late and I knew we should leave but I didn't want to. It was just so peaceful sitting here, but I knew it was time.

"We should probably go inside before we get in trouble." I said standing up. We both silently strolled back to the castle and to our common rooms.

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Five Days Later

"Harry you're bloody lucky you weren't killed! You have to realize who you are!" I said after he told me what happened over christmas break. Apparently after the visited Harry's house in Godric's Hollow they went to Ron's house where they spent the majority of their time. Well the Death Eaters that escaped last year decided to pay them a visit. They burnt down the Borrow, thankfully no one was injured.

"I know who I am Hermione." He said over the chattering students in the hall. I glared at him and he mumbled a quick sorry. We continued to walk through the hall. He told me about how Dumbledore was traveling and about Lupin and how Lupin trust Snape, then he mentioned Draco.

"I think that night that we saw Draco in Borgin and Burkes he was looking at a vanishing cabinet."

"What would Draco want with a vanishing cabinet?" I asked while we passed a group of Hufflepuff girls.

"You tell me." He answered.

It took awhile before answering. I decided to try to get Harry off Dracos case, even though it won't work because he is so stubborn, but there is no harm in trying.

"He looks different, Don't you think? Draco. Almost ill." I said in a slightly concerned voice. Because even though I was concerned for his heath, I didn't want Harry to know. He wouldn't understand the bond me and Draco have been creating. Memories of our shared kiss began to penetrate my mind. I tried to shake the feeling away but I couldn't until Harry spoke again.

"Who could tell the difference?" He said. I was about to say more when we came to a stop in front of Lavender and Ron. She was fussing over how he could have died and that she was so glad he didn't get hurt. I turned away and mumbled,

"Excuse me, I'm going to barf." Harry nodded slomly.

I walked away to find Ginny, maybe vent about my feelings. I had decided I didn't like Ron romantically over the course of the past five days. It had something to do with Draco, although i didn't like him like that either. It was something else, I just didn't know what. All I had thought about this week is me and Dracos kiss. What did it mean? Did I like him romantically? Or was it just in the moment? We haven't even mentioned it since it happened, it's like it didn't happen. But that didn't mean I didn't catch him looking at me in our classes we had together, and the way he would turn his eyes to the ground every time I looked back at him. Sometimes I even caught myself looking back at him for longer than necessary.

Tonight we are supposed to meet in the Room of Requirement and I'm planning on bringing it up, hence the word planning. The likelihood of me actually bringing it up is very slim. Don't get me wrong I want to understand it, but what if it gets weird between us? What if he has a panic attack? So many unanswered questions. I feel as if Draco is a ticking time bomb, with just one wrong move he could blow. He's been through so much that it's so hard for me to understand. He's so broken yet he puts on this face that no one can see through. It almost makes me envy him, if I had been put through that much I would not be standing. Not to say I'm not strong but what he's been through, it's like he's not human.

"So um Granger… can we talk about something?" Draco asked timidly. Instantly I knew what he was going to bring up. I had wanted to bring it up myself but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

"It's about our kiss right? Because I have been thinking of that too. See I'm not really sure how I feel, and-" He cut me off.

"Granger I just don't think I'm the right person for you. I mean I don't even know what love feels like, so how am I supposed to care for other people? I just…" He hung his head defeated. "I don't think we should meet up anymore, I like talking to you and everything but I don't want Potter or Weasley to get suspicious. And I definitely don't want my father finding out." He Finished still not looking at me. I could feel a lump in my throat forming. It hurt me to know how scared Draco was, there was something else that he was hiding. Something that was deeply troubling him.

"Draco there is something else isn't there? You know you can tell me." His head snapped up and he stood up as fast as he could.

"No nothings wrong." He said quickly.

"Draco?" I asked again, standing as well.

"Granger drop it. That's all I wanted to say, we shouldn't meet up any more. The kiss was just something in the moment." He grabbed his things and headed for the door.

"Malfoy what's wrong?" I had switched to using his surname as well.

"Granger! I said drop it!" He swiftly left; his green apple cologne still tainting the air.

That was probably the strangest experience. I stood there for what seemed like forever, just going over what had happened. Something clearly was wrong with him. Like what the hell, I was mad but at the same time worried. If he didn't want to talk to me then whatever is bothering him must be pretty bad. But I was not about to go chase after him, if he wanted to talk he would. I'll give him a week then he'll talk to me.

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One week later

Nothing. He didn't even talk to me when we passed in the hallway he just kept his head down.

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Two weeks later

We brushed past each other and he grumbled. But still nothing.

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March 4th

This week had been Ron's birthday. He turned seventeen so he was able to take his apperation and disapperation test. No word from Draco still, when I saw him in class today his face was grim.

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April 23d(A/N btw that's my birthday!)

I didn't even see him all week, which concerned me but as usual I said nothing.

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June 18th

Harry messed up big time. He used one of the spells in the Half-Blood Princes book. But what makes it even worse is that he used it on Draco. Sure we hadn't talked in months but I still cared about him. I used Harry invisibility coat to sneak into the hospital wing later that night. Draco was already sleeping so I sat down and read a book to him. He looked so peaceful sleeping, He didn't have a worry in the world. I remembered that night in the room of requirement with Blaise when he had that terrible panic attack. Godric's beard, I haven't spoken to Blasie in forever. I kissed his forehead before I left. I promised myself that I would talk to him after he gets out of the hospital wing. Did I like Draco Malfoy? The person who tormented me relentlessly? Possibly, Draco was so easy to talk to. He knew exactly how she felt. And not talking to him left her lonely even though she had Harry and Ron. But did he feel the same about her, or were her newly found feelings one sided?

June 20th

The day started out perfectly normal. Harry was requested by Dumbledore to go one this journey. I was planning on talking to Draco later that night. They waited for Harry to come but while they waited, Ron played wizards chess with Dean. I went to my room to start packing some of my things since end of term was near. When I went to put some of my books away I heard a faint tapping noise on the window.

tap,tap,tap.

I ever so carefully sat my books down and not so gracefully made it to the balcony size window. Perched on the window seal was a small grey owl with a note tied to him. I carefully undid the note and read the neat hand-writting.

Hermoine,

I'm sorry, for everything. You have to know I don't want to do this. It's a punishment. Please forgive me love. I had to cut off all communication so you wouldn't be caught in the crossfire. You mean too much to me. And if we are alive after this I hope to talk to you again. And that kiss meant more to me than you can ever imagine,

Draco.

I wanted to run and find him. To know what this meant but suddenly my limbs started to feel heavy and my eyelids feel.

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"Hermione get up!" Lavender brown was shaking me awake. It was now dark out and people were screaming outside.

"Hermione Death Eaters are here! The Ministry people are her to hold them off!" I jumped up. I knew it wasn't the Ministry It was the Order. Something tragic had happened. My first thought was to find Draco. I ran out of the room with my wand in hand and rushed to the fight. There were blast every where. People were crying and screaming. I saw Harry in the distance chasing a figure I couldn't place. I b-lined straight for him. Once I got close I could see he had tear tracks down his face. The figure he was chasing had turned out to be Snap but what surprised me even more was that Draco was with him. He had a look a pure dread on his face. a million things happened at once, Harry was firing spells at Snape and Draco was running to the gate to disapperate. I tried to catch up with him but it was too late, right before he left he turned around and whispered, I'm sorry. Snape was gone too. I ran to Harry.

"Harry what happened?" I asked out of breath kneeling next to him.

"Drcao… Snape.." He gulped and looked me in the eye. "Dumbledore is dead."

I froze. My mind was in a frenze. Dumbledore was dead. Snape and Draco were apart of it. And Draco was gone.


A/N: Thank You! R&R. also tell me who your fav was in endgame!