Hellooooooo semi-loyal fans!!!! Did you like my April Fools Prank???? ;) Hope so. 'cause all I need are you guys turning on me...
Anyway, heres the next 100 ways to annoy a person I don't own. No, that doesn't count as the disclaimer, I'm going to come up with something more creative for that.
Disclaimer: (insert clever way to say that I'm not the owner of HP here)
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Creative, huh?
Creativeish???
Oh well. Here we go.
Depants him in the hall
Blame Draco
Say: "I know about you-know-what you-know-when with You-Know-Who!!!"
Laugh manically
Ask him when you can meet his parents
Invite him home for the holidays
Invite him to dinner with your parents
Send him condoms for his birthday
…And Christmas
…And at any random time
With a note that says: "Just in case…"
Switch all his potion ingredients with jello
…With fruit bits
Offer him chocolate milk
…Every hour
…On the hour
Compare him with a PMSing woman
…Loudly
Follow him around and act like a ministerial
...Sing everything he days
…With rhymes
…Get others to do this
…Get Peeves to do this
Send him a gift certificate to a salon
…To get his hair washed
…And cut
... And for a facial, manicure and pedicure
…And waxing
…Do this for Christmas as a secret Santa
…And Easter as the Easter Bunny
Give him sex toys
…With a suggestive card
…Signed with Harry's name
…Or Sirius's
…Or Lupin's
…Or Dumbledore's
…Or Voldemort's
…Or Draco's
…Or Lucius's
Hex him into telling everyone it's his birthday
Hex him into forgetting to get dressed in the morning
Hex him into thinking he's dressed, when he really isn't
Tell him that McGonagall likes him
…Or Sprout
…Or Pomfrey
…Or Trelawney
…Or Umbrage
Tell him he looks tense
Recommend a spa day
If he agrees (slim chance) take him to a extremely fancy one and leave him in the mud bath until it hardens
Get him a really painful massage
Get his hair done by an intern
Pay them to shave his head
…Or do a mowhawk
…Or a buzz cut
…Or make his hair look like Harry's
…Or Dumbledore's
…Or Ron's
…Or Lucius's
If he gives you detention with himself, flirtatiously say: "Oh Sevy, if you wanted alone time with me, all you had to do was ask!"
…Loudly
If he gives you detention with anyone else, say: "How come we never spend time together anymore?"
…Loudly
When he mentions that you never did spend time together, say: "You mean you don't remember that beautiful night last Wednesday? Or the one before that? Or the one before…"
Say, if you ever get a good grade in his class: "You know those six magical hours we spent in the Room-of Requirement after the Yule Ball? This is better!!!!"
Skip out of the room
When he starts talking, stand up and scream: "AHHHH!!! THE VOICES ARE BACK!!!!"
Then sit down calmly
Invite him to your birthday party
…When its not your birthday
Send as many invitations as you can
…During the day
…That sing, of coarse
Make sure it's after hours
Make sure not to invite anyone else
Be creative of what happens at the party
Hex him so he grows horns
…And his skin turns red
Turn his wand into a pitch fork
…While he's sleeping
Write a daily comic with him in it as the star
Make sure he dies in every strip
Animate it (magically)
Compare him to every movie villain
...Ever
And every book villain
…Ever
Write essays on each comparison and turn them in as "extra credit"
…To every teacher
…Often
Slip LCD into his food
…Often
…Blame Draco
Write ballads with his name
…About the love between him and Narcissa
…Send them to Lucius and Draco
Watch results
Record results
Sell results to the highest bidder
…Send flyer to Snape
...And then run for your life. Siriusly (lol), I should know. I have tested all of these. Even though JKR hates my guts, she hates Snape's guts more. Which isn't fair, because Snape or my guts haven't done anything wrong!!!!
As I was saying, I have tested each of these, and all of them are very annoying. Veeeeeery annoying. And, as a special guest, the annoyed man himself will make an appearance if I get 15 or more reviews. Thats right, 15. Can you do that?? Good.
Oh ya, thanks to: coyotedreamer, fanficfan1037, Geek Squared 130, hufflclaw, Insanity's Partner, loser68, NessaroseThroppgirl, PericulosusBella, Redflower Fox, Rosa-Vulpes and The Choco-Holic for reviewing the last chapter, and the April Fools Prank!!!!
Oh Ya, therapy's going great!!! (twitch) I'm learning that, no matter what I do, HP will never be mine!!! (twitch) Sigh...
So... Review please and Snapey comes!!!
Luv,
Luna The Creative(ish)
