For story info, see chapter one.
Sorry, sorry, sorry for the delay. Winter, sick, you know the drill…
F is for Feathers, Fairies and Flaming Homos-
Chapter Seven
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Jack shall have Jill;
Nought shall go ill;
The man shall have his mare again,
and all shall be well.
(Puck, act III, scene II)
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Life was damn near perfect. Yes, it was.
Sure, at first it was a little embarrassing, people wriggling their eyebrows at him and making good natured lewd gestures simply because he had a boyfriend now. But Seamus found that with Oliver having his back he could just smile back and even throw in a sultry wink when people got into their shenanigans. The only really embarrassing bit was the morning Pansy Parkinson came up to him during breakfast and smacked a huge kiss right on his lips whispering 'Thank you' loud enough to make even Seamus blush, not to mention Hermione.
But Seamus couldn't care less about any of this. Not when he had Oliver by his side, not when he could ogle the man at meals without having to hide his stares, and especially not when Oliver was doing it right back. He loved it that he could walk around with Oliver, holding hands and exchanging small kisses and secret smiles. Sometimes Seamus felt like a bloody 12 years old girl but then he'd look over at Harry and Draco and somehow, next to them, it really didn't matter. Those two were like a walking 24-7 on going porn movie. Most of the guys found it rather unsettling, most of the girls just followed around to drool.
He supposed he and Oliver could be like that too, molesting each other in the Great Hall for the entire world to see, kissing like starving people for whom the other's lips are pure nectar. Or climbing onto each other's laps, like Harry was doing at this very moment, breakfast be damned. Seamus watched in fascination, like the rest of the school. He could never bring himself to do that, not in a million years. What he and Oliver shared was private and not meant for the eyes of the masses. He briefly wondered if it was the feather that was having such an impact or whether it was just Harry and Draco who were as horny as bloody rabbits. Because they certainly were... Going at it like that all the time, without regard nor consideration to people around them, but boy were they hot together, the way Harry would slide his hands through Draco's hair, or the way Draco's hands would slide to cup Harry's bum. Or… Oh, good gods, that was not something to be viewed by the large public… Or anyone who isn't an extra in a gay porn film!
"Enough!" The entire hall was startled from its 'Harry and Draco latest making-out session' staring and all eyes turned to Hannah who was standing up, panting and flushed. Harry slowly tore himself away from Draco, watching Hannah curiously, his lips ruby red and kiss swollen, which only made the Hufflepuff witch angrier. "Harry, this is by far the worst plan you've ever come up with to try and win me over!"
"What are you on about, Hannah?" If possible, Hannah's face grew even redder at Harry's bored tone. Gathering air she let out all the frustration and anger she was feeling ever since the whole mess with Draco started,
"Fuck you Potter! Fuck you! Gods, I hate men!" With that she stormed out of the Great Hall, the eyes of every student on her. Harry looked after her confused, as if he was trying to remember something that was sitting on the edge of his consciousness but couldn't. His eyes suddenly landed on Susan Bones, Hannah's best friend who was sending a death glare that was causing Harry to shrink back against Draco. Without a word Susan strode out of the hall in search of her friend. Harry watched her go, but as soon as the door closed behind her back he shrugged and turned back to Draco not wasting a second more to resume their kissing.
"Merlin, I never thought I'd say this about a Hufflepuff, but poor Hannah…" Pansy said, picking up her toast again and shaking her head. Next to her, her doting girlfriend, Hermione was smiling rather evilly,
"I think this is brilliant!" Pansy dropped her toast in disbelief,
"What? You saw how callous Harry was, how is that a good thing?" Hermione leaned over to brush her lips against Pansy's cheek, trying to placate the other girl,
"Well, at least we know now that Hannah has feelings for Harry. She's jealous."
"I don't blame her…" Lavender said thoughtfully, her eyes fixed on Harry and Draco, taking in every detail, biting her lips and softly panting at intervals. The rest of the table was giving her odd looks, "I mean just look at that! I don't know what Harry ever found in that dull girl, when he's got that perfect piece of blond arse, so… fucking… hot…" Dean was mimicking puking into his cereal bowl without Lavender noticing,
"Lavender, please. You're drooling all over my porridge." Seamus said in a bored tone, a little miffed at how hot she was finding all this. It wasn't that he wanted her to look at him and Oliver the same way, but still, two guys making out should not be such a turn on for girls!
Everyone but Harry and Draco could see Professor Snape approaching the Slytherin table where the two of them were far too busy to notice anyone but themselves. Looming over them the dark Potions Master cleared his throat loudly and deliberately. Harry tore himself away from Draco,
"What?" He snapped, turning his head to find his least favorite professor with his arms crossed over his chest and his eyebrow rose,
"That would be 20 points from Gryffindor for your rudeness Potter." Harry automatically opened his mouth to protest but Draco pulled his arm, and glared at him to be quiet, "Now, Mr. Potter, Mr. Malfoy, I understand that you feel the uncontrollable desire to consummate your relationship right here in the Great Hall, in front of us all, though I do not understand why. However, most of us are trying to have our breakfast, so if you don't mind, you might want to step outside to continue… this." He waved his hand in disdain at their general direction,
"Actually…" Harry began when Draco rolled his eyes, unable to believe his boyfriend could be so dense. He rose from his seat, making Harry, who was sitting in his lap rise as well, and tagged the brunet after him, headed for the doors. Harry threw a dirty look over shoulder at Snape who still stood there like a dark avenging angel, just anxious for Harry to open his big mouth so he'll have an excuse to unleash on him. The rest of the hall chuckled before resuming their breakfast, free of further interruptions.
Yes, life indeed was good. Heaven even.
The only thing Seamus seemed to be regretting these days was being unable to sing in the shower anymore. Technically no one was stopping him, but he wasn't taking chances- not after the joke he's made over purple eye shadows for the play only to find out that Oliver took him far too seriously. Seamus was afraid that if he'd start singing in the shower Oliver might get into his head that the play should be a musical. And just when Seamus was starting to warm up to the idea of having to perform Shakespeare in front of a huge audience he wasn't about to do it in song!
Between N.E.W.T.s, rehearsals, Oliver, homework, costume fitting, Oliver, working on his stage fright with Professor Flitwick, Oliver and more Oliver Seamus really didn't notice the time flying. The school year was progressing rather smoothly, even with the looming threat of the N.E.W.T.s and before he knew it Seamus was sitting down to his final exams, along with his peers. For two weeks, all he's been doing was cram information into his head and spewing it on the parchment during examination. By the end of the fortnight Seamus was mentally and physically exhausted to the point all he wanted to do was fall asleep in Oliver's arms and wake up when fall rolled in again.
But his biggest challenge to date was yet to come. The much dreaded play, which was scheduled for the day after the official school ending. Dumbledore has decided that the best thing would be to combine all and every party to one giant celebration to be held on the Quidditch pitch after the play was done. Up until then Seamus had managed to convince himself that it was all a dream, that all the practicing and reciting was done just so he can get closer to Oliver, that all the people scheduled to come to see him act were not real. But then the delegations from the other schools started to arrive and Seamus was faced with the reality of the situation. Butterflies were taking permanent residence in his stomach and the only things that could calm the bouts of hysteria were Oliver's hands and lips.
"Good morning gorgeous, time to wake up…" Oliver's sultry voice was sending little shivers down Seamus' spine, and the Irishman hummed affectionately. "It's a big day today." The little smile slipped off Seamus' face and was replaced by a pout. Suddenly the appeal of waking up to Oliver's clever hands was completely lost, with the knowledge that in just a few hours he'd have to get up on stage and perform…
"No… I'm staying in bed until tomorrow." He decided, and Oliver chuckled.
"Well, you can't. Up." Without waiting for Seamus to respond Oliver easily flipped the smaller man onto his back, pulling the sheets down in the process. Seamus whined, his eyes still closed and blindly tried to grab the blankets and roll over in order to go back to sleep. But Oliver would have none of that. He straddled Seamus, grabbing the flailing hands and pinned them to the mattress. Seamus, realizing he was trapped, finally conceded to open his eyes.
"You're mean." He complained, his pout getting fiercer, which only made Oliver smile wider,
"You're my little star; I cannot have you sleeping all day." Leaning forward he brushed his lips against Seamus' ear, whispering seductively, "I happen to know some really great relaxation techniques, would you like me to show you?" Seamus grinned wide, would he ever!
Oliver smiled wickedly in return and started placing small, hot kisses along the path of Seamus' neck, down to his collarbone. Seamus closed his eyes, blocking all the outside distractions and concentrating solely on the feeling of Oliver's lips. He let out a soft moan, and another when the sensual lips reached his chest and a wicked tongue joined in. Seamus' head fell back, his eyes closed and his breathing labored, it was bliss, pure bliss and for as long as he's had Oliver's lips on him he didn't need to think of anything else.
Seamus was just letting the intense shivers run through his body as Oliver tongue-fucked his naval, feeling the ripples in his skin extending from his center to the very tips of his fingers and toes when Oliver's clever tongue suddenly disappeared. Disoriented Seamus opened his eyes, blinking in confusion,
"Wha'?" He blinked up to see Oliver's face turned away from him, looking at the window above him. Seamus craned his neck trying to see what had caught his lover's attention. "What is it?"
"There's an owl outside." Oliver said. Seamus craned his neck a little further and then he saw it, standing there on the window ledge looking at the two of them. Seamus felt himself shrinking back and his cheeks burning- gods this was stupid, but to him it felt like the owl was sending them reproachful glares, and he'd be buggered if he'd let an owl dictate his sex life!
"Ignore it." Seamus rasped, eager to have Oliver's lips back on him. This was ridiculous; he wasn't going to let a stupid bird ruin his morning fun! Oliver, however, sighed deeply and rose to his knees; he looked down when Seamus let out a small disappointed whimper,
"When was the last time you ignored an owl and it just left?" Seamus rolled his eyes and cursed the entire owl species under his breath. Oliver bit his lip to hide his grin and slid from the bed. Seamus turned to his side, propping himself on his elbow and ogled Oliver's gloriously naked rump. Hell, if he didn't get any action he'd have to settle for looking, right?
"It's for you." Seamus was startled, blinking in confusion and turning to look up at Oliver's face. The older man had an eyebrow raised, knowing perfectly well where his little Irish brat's attention had been. "It's from Dumbledore." All the blood seemed to have drained from Seamus' face and he sat straighter in bed, pulling the sheet to him as if the headmaster had actually been in the room. Oliver chuckled and made his way back to the bed, sitting on the edge of it and handing the parchment to Seamus.
"He wants to see me in his office." Seamus told him uneasily after reading the missive. Oliver nodded, "Why would he want to see me in his office?" Oliver shrugged. Seamus frowned, what on earth could the headmaster want with him on the eve of their show?
"Maybe he wants to congratulate his star in person?" Oliver suggested, and Seamus' whole body involuntarily flinched at the mention of his 'star' status.
"Or maybe he'd like to tell me that I failed all my N.E.W.T.s and that I can't be on the play because of it!" Seamus' eyes were shining so bright it was actually stabbing at Oliver's heart. Seamus wasn't supposed to be this happy about the idea!
"Do you really think the headmaster would do that without telling me?" He shot through clenched teeth but Seamus refused to back down,
"He might." He purred with a charming smile, dropping the message carelessly as he rose to his knees in order to straddle Oliver. The Scotsman rolled his eyes, sure, worm your way out of potential arguments by using your devilishly sexy body… See if I care…
"You should go. Lunch is nearly over." Oliver managed between kisses, not sounding at the least persuasive. Seamus pushed him back towards the bed, running his hands slowly down Oliver's body. Who cared what Dumbledore had to say? It wasn't like he was going to swoop in and chastises Seamus for being late, right? Seamus gulped and sprang free from Oliver's embrace, his breathing suddenly labored. He looked over at the fireplace; as if afraid the headmaster's head will show up in green flames. Oliver looked confused, "What is it?"
"I should probably go, lunch is almost over." Seamus said distractedly, keeping his eye on the fireplace while he discreetly snatched a sheet off the bed to cover himself with. Quickly he gathered his clothes and fled to the bathroom. Oliver watched his boyfriend's antics amused, guessing what had gotten Seamus' knickers in such a twist. Good old Dumbles could scare the sexual drive out of any hormone driven teenager. Pity really.
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Standing in front of the gargoyle guarding the entrance to the headmaster's office Seamus hesitated. What if the headmaster did tell him he was voted off the play? The memory of Oliver's face when he said it stabbed at Seamus. He really didn't want to act, but he really didn't want to upset Oliver either, and at this moment a lot of Oliver's creditability was lying on the play and how well he, Seamus was going to do in it.
The gargoyle suddenly sprang to life and hopped aside, causing Seamus to jump as well, in surprise. Swallowing hard and forcing the panic down Seamus closed his eyes and set his feet on the spiral staircase, letting it carry him up.
"Come inside, my boy." Dumbledore's cheery voice called from inside even before Seamus had a chance to knock, making Seamus feel even more uneasy and wondering exactly how much the old man knew of what was going on in his castle. "Tea?" Seamus quickly shook his head, his stomach tying in so many nervous knots he knew he couldn't keep anything down, not even liquids.
"You called for me sir?" He asked, his voice sounding small and meek in his ears and Seamus hated himself for being weak. After all, he's done nothing wrong, well, nothing that was so badly wrong that he'd have to be sent to the headmaster's office, right?
"Yes, I did. I wanted to talk to you about the Veela Feather you have." Dumbledore looked at his student, studying him carefully. Seamus wasn't a bad boy, in fact compared to other Gryffindors he was actually a very good one, not getting into trouble and certainly not breaking school rules left and right like some of his fellow house-mates.
That was the reason this was so hard on Dumbledore- he was puzzled, intrigued and curious and that was never a good thing for the man he was facing. How on earth did the boy manage to get his hands on something so rare and so valuable? It wasn't black market purchasing, Dumbledore knew, for he had checked all his contacts in Knockturn Alley and none of them has either sold or heard of a selling of such thing. Not that Dumbledore thought that Seamus could afford a Veela Feather even if he did find a place that was willing to sell him one. Besides, the boy hasn't left the castle in over a fortnight.
This meant he got the feather on school grounds, and that was making Dumbledore even more curious than before. Was it possible that there were Male Veela down in the Forbidden Forest? Hagrid certainly never reported seeing one. Even the centaurs never reported to seeing one and they roamed the forest's length and width and very little escaped their notice.
"Th-the V-veela Feather?" Seamus felt his heart sink, deep down he knew that this moment would come and that was probably why he was so reluctant to step into the headmaster's office, but somehow he managed to convince himself that it wouldn't. If Dumbledore knew, that means he'd have to break his promise to Thorsten, which would mean a great deal of pain for him. As much as he feared and respected his headmaster he didn't feel like facing the wrath of a Veela should his secret be found.
"Indeed. Though I do not know how you obtained one, and don't worry, I do not mean to interrogate you about it, measures needs to be taken." Dumbledore said gravely, this was truly killing him but he knew that if Seamus had somehow managed to meet up with a Veela and come back alive there was no way he could tell the tale. Seamus lowered his head, a small wave of relief washing over him. At least Thorsten secret was safe, even if Seamus' future wasn't.
"I'm sorry sir; I didn't mean to hurt anyone…" Dumbledore sighed,
"I know, my dear boy, I know." Dumbledore said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. He hated having to do this, especially since technically no one was at harm and in fact most people were quite happy about the situation (except Hannah, for obvious reasons and Snape simply because he was a joyless bastard) but still, lines had to be set and it was his job to make sure they weren't crossed. "But things cannot continue the way they have." Seamus' head was still lowered and he nodded feebly. Why was this happening to him? Today of all days? Today was a day he was meant to spend with Oliver, relaxing and trying to convince himself he'd get through the damn play and all will be right after it was over, not a day to deal with this.
"Sir?" He asked meekly, biting his lip and bracing himself for the worst,
"You must reverse the Feather's effect." Seamus' body sagged, his hands which were clasped tight on his lap where turning white with the force he held them together were the only outer sign that he'd been listening. For a long moment the two sat silent, each trying to get the other to speak first. In the end it was Dumbledore who decided to spare his pupil, "I have here a reversal potion that will rid those affected by the spell of the Feather," He said quietly, pushing a small glass vial in Seamus' direction. The boy didn't lift his head to look, "You must open it in the changing room before the play, where all your friends will gather. The fumes from the potion will work as an antidote and all shall be reversed back to its original state."
All shall be reversed back to its original state, meaning Harry will go back to pursue Hannah with his clumsy and rather embarrassing-to-watch affection and stop trying to teach the entire school the joys of gay sex in the middle of meals and Ron will stop creeping Professor Flitwick out with his googly eyes. But at the same time it also meant that Oliver would be reversed to his original state, which was to shag Cedric. Seamus felt his eyes stinging at the thought, Oliver will go back to Cedric and he, Seamus would be left alone and loveless.
"Mr. Finnigan." Seamus jumped at the sound of his name, finally lifting his eyes to his headmaster. To his surprise the man looked almost as grave as he felt. "I'm sorry to put this burden on you my boy today of all days especially when I know how hard it is for you to walk upon the stage, but you must understand- tomorrow everyone will be heading home for the summer, or in the case of the people who's been dusted- for good and I cannot, in good conscience, let them walk out of Hogwarts gates still under the influence." Seamus looked at the vial, at the potion inside that looked like swirling fumes of red and pink. He could feel a tear sliding from his eyes, tickling its way on his cheek and he furiously wiped it away, but still said nothing. Dumbledore sighed, he really didn't want to resort to bribery but if the boy didn't show any signs of accepting his task and fulfilling it, he really didn't have much of a choice, "I'm afraid that if you don't do it yourself than I shall have to."
Seamus gulped. He knew Dumbledore wouldn't trust him enough without having a back-up plan, and for a moment he was tempted to ask Dumbledore to do it himself- take the potion and do what was necessary. But that would be cowardice, that would be running away from his responsibility and that was something that Seamus couldn't do. He'd made this mess and it was up to him to fix it- as much as he hated the thought. Standing up slowly he pocketed the potion, and gave his headmaster a single nod before leaving the room.
Seamus managed to make it as far as the lake before he slumped under an oak tree and brought his knees to his chest, shaking. The vial in his pocket seemed to weigh a tone and for a fleeting second Seamus had the urge to fling it into the sparkling surface of the water, let the giant squid do whatever he wanted with the potion.
He was going to lose Oliver. The only man he ever loved and wanted to be with, he was going to lose him, either by his own hands or, worse, by Dumbledore and then not only will he be alone, he'd be a disgrace. Dumbledore never said he'd put anything on Seamus' record should he fail to do his bidding but he will know, and Seamus will know and it will probably eat away at him for the rest of his life.
Maybe there was still salvation in the situation; maybe Oliver would still want him, minus the feather dust… Yeah right, and Harry and Draco will get married and have kids… Seamus banged his head forcefully backwards against the tree trunk, this was ridiculous! Oliver was a free person; he should love whoever he pleased, regardless of what Seamus wanted. Seamus' heart broke at the realization, but here it was- Oliver was never his to begin with. But that only made the idea of letting go of him so much harder.
Seamus stared at the lake; people were standing at its shore, talking, laughing, and playing games. It was like leisure Sunday in the park, his friends sitting on the grass in groups. As Seamus watched from the shade of the tree he was under, partly hidden from the masses he could see the tentative approaching of several Hogwarts students to the foreign ones and a slow mingle that was taking over both sides. This was good thing, this was what Dumbledore wanted, Seamus thought somewhat bitterly. The old man always got his way.
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"This is where you've been hiding all afternoon?" Seamus lifted his head, startled out of his thoughts. Oliver was looming over him, a worried smile on his face. Seamus rubbed his neck, feeling the stiffness of the muscles after hours of sitting on the same spot. "I've been looking for you." Seamus' heart skipped a beat, Oliver went looking for him, which meant that he cared, maybe even beyond the feather's influence… "It's time to get ready." But then again, maybe it was all for the sake of his precious play.
Seamus let the other man pull him to his feet, his legs quivering under him, knees rigid and unbending. He shook his legs trying to get the blood flowing again before the two started making their way towards the castle. Once inside Oliver led Seamus into the room behind the Great Hall which was turned into a dressing room for the cast for the night.
Seamus let Daphne Greengrass and Lavender Brown fuss over him with costume and make-up, feeling completely detached from the proceedings, watching with a kind of disinterest as the others chatted excitedly while they transformed into fairies and nobles. The five girls forming Titania's entourage were flocking about laughing, clad in sheer, glossy fabrics and sprinkling silver glitter on each other and everyone in their vicinity. Everyone seemed so excited, so happy, their eyes shining like jewels and their faces bright and Seamus just wanted to yell at them all to stop it! Stop being so merry when there were greater, far more important matters than a stupid play nobody really cared about! Stop laughing and rejoicing because every smile and every grin was piercing him like a spear and reminding him that he was about to lose the one thing he cared about most in the world! It was completely unfair.
Reaching into his pocket Seamus fingered the vial Dumbledore had given him. The old man's words were echoing through his mind- "If you don't do it yourself than I shall have to"… There was no way around this, was there? If Seamus didn't pluck up enough courage to face reality then Dumbledore will do it for him. Seamus nearly broke down with hysterical laughter, how on earth has his life turned this way?
Taking a deep breath he quickly marched over to the nearest table, pulled the vial from his pocket and then faltered. Could he really give up Oliver? Could he really do this? Even though it was the right thing to do and all, could he really give away his dreams like that? Seamus ventured a look at Oliver, who was standing with Pansy, trying to appease the shrieking girl who seemed enraged over something. But could he really keep holding on to Oliver like this? How was it fair to Oliver who didn't expect or wanted to fall in love with Seamus in the first place?
Clenching his jaw Seamus quickly pulled the stopper from the vial, almost throwing it on the table before he fled to the door. He's done what Dumbledore asked him to do, he did the right thing, but that didn't mean he'd have to stay there and watch the shine of love going dark and vanishing from Oliver's eyes. Seamus ran blindly, not knowing or caring where he was going until he reached the low fence, guarding Hagrid's pumpkin patch, and leaned against it.
Tears, hot and fat were trickling down his cheeks, and Seamus did nothing to wipe them away even though their salt was stinging at his nose. Bending over as if suffering from colic he let out a low moan. And then another, and another and slowly the volume increased until he was shouting his misery to the warm night sky, his broken cries swallowed by the tall trees of the Forbidden Forest. Oh, how he wished he'd never have met Thorsten, how he wished he'd never encountered that passage in the book about Love Potions… Seamus wished for so many things right now, but mostly he wished for Oliver to be there besides him holding him and telling him that everything was going to be alright. A soft hand was laid on his shoulder and Seamus nearly jumped out of his skin. Turning around he saw the worried face of Dean. Unable to summon any sense of dignity Seamus simply fell into his best friend's arms and sobbed. Dean, a little startled by the volume of emotions patted Seamus' back a little awkwardly.
"I can't do this… I can't do this…" Seamus mumbled his voice thick with tears. Dean sighed, he knew Seamus was suffering from stage fright but this was worst than he thought. Gently he prayed the Irishman's fingers from his shirt, holding him at arm's length so that he could look Seamus in the eye,
"Yes, you can, and you will. You've done this before…" Seamus shook his head,
"No, not like this, not in front of hundreds of people…" The sheer number was chocking him up; it was too much too soon. "And not with bloody wings!" He cried, reaching back and trying to catch the wings that were strapped to his back. Dean caught his flailing hand,
"Oi! Lay off the wings!" He cried, "I made those!" However silly and immature as the idea of wings sounded to Dean he was dead proud of the ones he designed and made for all the fairies and he'd be damned if his best friend of all people will ruin them, no matter how distressed he was!
"I can't do it." Seamus said hollowly, suddenly losing all his fighting spirit. He couldn't, he really couldn't. Going up on stage was one thing, going up without Oliver's support was… Unbearable. "They're just going to have to find someone else." Of course! It was so simple, how come he didn't think of it sooner?
"There's no one else. You don't have an understudy." Yeah, that was probably why…
"Why is that?" He was the bloody lead for heaven's sake; shouldn't he at least enjoy the benefits of an understudy? What if he was sick? Or managed to injure himself during the final exams- after all, there wasn't a shortage of dangerous classes in Hogwarts! It was very irresponsible of Dumbledore and even Oliver not to provide him with suitable replacement! "Alright, then they'll just have to cancel the play. It's not like people paid good money to see any of us; they could just have the party and mingle without this stupid play!"
"Shay, what's wrong?" Dean could tell this was no longer about the play, Seamus was just venting out feelings through it. It was strange, because Seamus had been so happy and carefree and even confident not 24 hours ago and Dean was curious as to what brought upon this total nervous breakdown.
"I… I… fucked it up, real bad." Seamus whispered, slumping to the ground and leaning against the fence. Dean bit his lip in horror seeing the wings crushed against the wooden beams but he held himself back, knowing that Seamus needed support not reprimand but Merlin help him if Dean would be unable to fix the wings when they were done with their little emo moment, Seamus was going to be in quite a heap of trouble!
"Fucked what up?" He asked as he carefully sat down next to his friend, stealing a glance behind Seamus' back to assess the damage,
"The only thing that kept me going." Dean snapped his head in astonishment,
"What? Oliver?" Seamus nodded gloomily, his eyes smarting up again at the mention of the name, "That's daft! Oliver loves you!" Dean was honestly confused. This was about Oliver? The man who practically worshiped the ground Seamus walked on? Oliver whose face lit up every time he saw Seamus in a way that made even the very much heterosexual Dean feel the envy coiling in his gut?
"No, he doesn't. Not on his own." There was a sad smile on Seamus' face, which Dean didn't like one bit. It wasn't like Seamus to just give up; the man was notorious for his bloodhound qualities of never letting go until he got his way. Seamus giving up was… was scary. It was disheartening to the rest of them.
"I don't understand." Dean confessed lowly, feeling at his wit's end about this. Seamus was never a complex man, who tried to shroud everything in mystery- far from it and this evasiveness was making Dean nervous and worried. Seamus looked at his friend, his eyes brimming with regret,
"I did something, something I shouldn't have done. And now… I've lost him."
"Look, I'm sure that whatever you think you did…" Seamus waved his hands wildly,
"Stop! Stop trying to make me feel better. I fucked up royally and now I'm paying the price, all right?" Dean nodded, defeated. "I think I need to be alone for a while, please?" As much as Dean wanted to give into his friend's wishes, right now was it was not a possibility,
"You can't. The play." Seamus racked his hands through his hair, messing up the hairdo that Lavender worked so hard over in the process,
"Damn it Dean, I told you I'm not going…"
"No!" Dean cried, raising to his knees and towering over his friend, "You listen to me now! Whatever you think you did to Oliver or anyone else doesn't matter now! We've worked too hard on this, you've worked too hard on this and you're not going to throw it all away! We're all a team and you're part of this and there's no way I'm letting you go off and sulk while we have to make excuses for you!" Seamus opened his mouth to protest but Dean thrust something in his face, "Here!"
"What is it?" Seamus asked meekly, a little startled by his friend's outburst. He looked at the vial of potion in wonder,
"It's a calming draught. I've got a couple more bottles in case this wears off before the play is over." Seamus looked up in astonishment. Dean really went to all the trouble of procuring enough calming draught for him to pass the play with? Seamus felt like crying again- he was being a selfish arse! Dean, looking a little uncomfortable with the shine of tears tried to shrug it off, "Yeah, that's what friends do. Now are you going to go up there and do your bit or do I have to force you?" Seamus snorted,
"Force me? I'd like to see you try!" He cried challengingly, as Dean helped him to his feet, making a fuss over the wings and casting several charms to straighten them up,
"Hey, I play Quidditch, you play fairies. Do not make me go brute on your fairy arse!" Seamus slapped his hands away,
"Stop saying fairy!" He snapped as they made their way back towards the castle, Dean hovering close in case Seamus was faking it and tried to make a run for it,
"Fairy."
"Wanker." Dean laughed, glad to see that Seamus was in a better mood and the dark clouds were dispersing. No one liked a gloomy Seamus, it was just wrong. Upon arriving at the door to the dressing room Seamus stopped, and taking a deep breath he donned the calming draught in one go, grimacing slightly at the taste.
"Go. Go and make us all proud. Make Oliver proud." Dean said somberly and Seamus sagged,
"Oh, crap. I hate these melodramatic moments… Now I feel obligated…" Dean winked,
"I know." Seamus pulled a face at him,
"Tosser." Dean blew him a raspberry kiss, as he pushed Seamus through the door,
"Go, and be the best fairy you can." Seamus wriggled his shoulder blades, causing the wings to shake a little and tossed behind his shoulder,
"Aren't I always?" Dean laughter followed him through the door and Seamus felt like he was floating.
This calming draught was amazing! Gone was the anxiety and the fear, gone were the doubts and self-loathing. In fact, Seamus surmised, he couldn't feel much of anything- which right now was the way he preferred it. He let Lavender fuss over his hair and ruined make-up, clicking her tongue at the state of him. He couldn't see Oliver anywhere, but he could hear the voices of his friends already reciting their opening words. Seamus closed his eyes and took a deep breath; gentle hands were guiding him towards the stage's wings. Seamus let Dean shove him onto the stage, with almost no resistance at all.
"How now, spirit! Whither wander you?"
