Chapter 7 - The Need of Atonement
Sakura felt her mind draw a blank when Madara all but ordered her not to get hurt. She didn't know what she supposed to think or feel and she was afraid to find out what she would think and feel.
"I won't," Sakura managed to reply, giving herself credit for how calm and unaffected she sounded. She ignored her pounding heart and decreased the flow of her healing chakra.
The words the Uchiha had said earlier about being able to sense Sasuke's chakra in hers, were still churning in her mind. She knew patient dependency when she saw it, and she had a sinking feeling that dependency was a side effect of the Chakra Scent Technique.
Sakura shook her head lightly, deciding to bury her thoughts for now. She gently eased away from Madara and helped him recline onto the bed. His eyes were closed and his breathing had evened out. The pinkette moved to get up from her perch on Madara's bed when his hand shot out, fingers curling around her wrist.
"Where are you going?" he asked, his voice lacked its usual venom, instead it was tired and worn.
Something squeezed inside Sakura's chest again.
"I need to get more medication for your IV," Sakura replied before prying Madara's fingers from her wrist.
"I think it's about time I started you on solid food...what would you like to eat?"
Madara's eyes snapped open at Sakura's gentle, almost pitying tone. He hated pity.
"Are you treating me like your infant patients?" he hissed, but he was too tired to do anything more than glare at his pink haired medic.
Sakura rolled her eyes, pursing her lips at the Uchiha's self importance.
"Uchiha-san please choose something to eat or I will have to choose for you," she repeated, her voice firm.
"I don't want any food from this filthy place, who knows what kind of poison those Konoha maggots will put in my food…" Madara turned away from Sakura, rolling onto his side, his shackles clanking against the bed.
Sakura's heart squeezed once more.
He was afraid they would poison him. She didn't quite know whether to laugh or pity him.
A frown creased Sakura's forehead. As she continued to think about it she found herself unable to blame Madara for being weary. Konoha had betrayed him many times. Before she realized exactly what she was saying, Sakura found herself telling Madara she would prepare the food for him.
"I will cook the food, because I cannot have you not eat because of your trust issues. It is my duty to ensure my patients recovery."
She felt better when she viewed it as her duty. She was a doctor and he was her patient. That was the reason why she was doing this. It wasn't because she felt sorry for him or anything…
Sakura quickly exited the cell, not waiting to hear Madara's reply. A myriad of emotions crashed over her and her knees wobbled slightly. She was still torn between sympathizing with her patient and hating him for terrorising her world and slaughtering her fellow shinobi. She knew more about the Uchiha now and knew that it was impossible for her view of him to continue in black and white but she wasn't quite ready to view him in any other way.
Yet still, despite her hesitation to change her mindset about him, she felt the undeniable tug to break his curse of hatred.
Madara's eyes shifted beneath his lids as he heard Sakura exit his cell. As soon as the heavy door slammed behind her he began to miss the peaceful warmth her presence provided.
She had been doing something to him. Every time his mind had threatened to devour him she had pulled him from the vortex and every time he had smelt the cherry blossom scent of her chakra.
The Uchiha clenched his jaw. He felt raw, exposed and invaded. The medic had slipped behind his defenses and to add to his humiliation he knew that he couldn't keep himself together without her help.
The great Uchiha Madara had fallen so far. He was on the brink of insanity with nothing but a puny pink haired medic from the place he hated so much, for a life line.
But there was nothing he could do. It was the price he had to pay for his numerous sins.
As Sakura's footsteps echoed in the distance, Madara decided that he would find out what she'd done to him. Even though he was but a shadow of what he used to be he knew he could still get what he wanted from others.
When Sakura left Madara's cell, she wasted no time getting to Tsunade's office. She had to reveal her findings to her shishou.
Sakura squared her shoulders and knocked on the door to Tsunade's office, entering when she was prompted to do so.
"What is it?" Tsunade asked from behind piles of paper littered across her desk. She wearily observed Sakura before taking a swig out of the sake in her hands.
"I've been researching the uses of healing chakra and I came across a very interesting theory...chakra scent," Sakura said, slightly breathless, but continued when Tsunade quirked a brow.
"Well I came to the conclusion that just like how you can smell someone's scent the same can be done with chakra. One can smell the unique scent of a person's chakra if emotionally close to the person, or if the two people have a natural connection with each other. In medical terms if the healing chakra is transferred from the user to the receiver it has an aromatherapy effect. While I was researching this theory I tried it out on some of the children at my clinic and I accidentally tried it on Madara when he had a spell of insanity…"
Sakura took a gulp of air as she stared at the floor, waiting for Tsunade to scold her or something for illegally experimenting.
She heard a sigh and then a chuckle which made her head snap up. Tsunade was smiling directly at her.
"You never fail to surprise me Sakura," she said, the corners of her lips lifted and her eyes glimmering with pride. "But why are you telling me this now?"
"Well I wanted to officially use it to treat Madara's mental decline…" Sakura shrugged, but her eyes were hard with determination. She would go ahead even if she didn't have her shishou's approval.
"Well I won't be able to stop you anyway so go ahead, but I would like if you reported his progress to me, I have the counsel to answer to." Tsunade smiled then she was all business.
"Do you have your research notes nearby?"
Sakura nodded and retrieved a scroll from her pocket, unsealed it and handed Tsunade the papers inside.
"I still have to update some sections, but that's basically all of my research on the technique so far."
"If you continue to report Madara's progress to me, when your research notes are fully complete I will submit them to the counsel so you can get a grant to continue research," Tsunade said, her eyes never leaving the papers as she leafed through them.
Sakura's eyes lit up at the prospect of getting a research grant and her face split into a smile.
"Thank you Tsunade-sama! Thank you!" Sakura sputtered as she bowed repeatedly out of respect and gratitude.
"Mmm, now get back to work!" Tsunade said dismissively but Sakura didn't miss the sparkle in her eyes or the slight smile that curved the corner of her lips upwards.
"Hai!" Sakura answered before exiting Tsunade's office and heading to her apartment.
She had food to make for a certain Uchiha.
Madara stared down at the bowl of some sort of stew that Sakura had put before him.
"I'm supposed to ingest that?" Madara asked, his lips curled back in disgust.
Sakura rolled her eyes, the Uchiha's elitist complex was really grating on her nerves.
"I made it as you requested, and it tastes better than it looks, Sakura said politely, but her eyes were narrowed as she struggled to hold in her temper. Madara noticed Sakura's thinning patience and smirked at the medic. He liked to toy with her patience.
"I refuse to eat this," he said bluntly, turning his head away haughtily, his smirk widening when he heard Sakura take in a deep breath.
"Uchiha! You will eat it! Unless you want to have the food the nurses made?" Sakura hissed, green eyes flashing.
Madara jumped at the opportunity to manipulate Sakura. He had questions that he wanted answers to.
"I will eat it...but only on one condition."
Sakura raised a brow, she felt very close to knocking out the infuriating Uchiha.
"What is it?" she asked, trying her best to keep her professionalism in place.
"You will tell me what technique you have been using on me without my permission all this time."
Sakura couldn't help but let her mouth fall open at Madara's words. He had known she had been using the Chakra Scent Technique on him all along...The pinkette mentally slapped herself. Of course he would have known! He wasn't a legendary shinobi for naught.
'Well I was going to tell him anyway so I might as well just agree...' Sakura thought as regained a grip on her emotions.
"You have my word," Sakura promised Madara, her gaze directly meeting his. She was a woman of her word.
"Hn," Madara nodded after surveying Sakura for a couple seconds. He could tell she wasn't lying. But as he continued to think about her using a technique on him a bitter taste erupted in his mouth as a thought crossed his mind. Was his dependency on her presence because of this jutsu or whatever she was using on him? Had she reduced him to this pathetic state?
He hated the mere thought of it.
"Now eat...please," Sakura said, tacking on the polite request almost as an after thought.
Madara motioned his head towards his shackles.
"I don't think I'm in any position to do so…" he smirked at the look of outrage that flashed across Sakuras face before she shoved it behind her mask of professionality.
Normally he wouldn't let anyone feed him but for some reason he wanted her to do it. Maybe it was because he liked making her uncomfortable...or because of something else he couldn't quite pin point.
"Fine!" Sakura huffed, not in the mood to argue with the Uchiha. She jammed the spoon into the bowl but was surprisingly gentle when she lifted it to his lips.
Madara slowly parted his lips, his gaze pinned to Sakura, dark eyes never wavering from her green ones. Before Sakura even realized it she was feeling uncomfortable, but there was no respite because Madara didn't break his gaze, not even when the spoon was enveloped in between his lips.
Sakura grinned at Madara when he licked his lips after the first spoonful.
"See? I told you it was tasty!" she said triumphantly, dipping the spoon back into the bowl.
Madara just raised a dark brow, he was not going to admit that it actually tasted good.
"Hn."
But Sakura didn't get very far with the second spoonful of stew before Madara started retching. His body was rejecting the solid food after not having any for so long.
"Crap!" Sakura swore as she reached for a basin, managing to catch most of vomit that Madara hurled up. Blood dripped from his chin; vomiting had irritated his partially healed throat and reopened some of the wounds. Sakura pressed her hands to Madara's neck in one swift motion and quickly healed the lacerations in his throat.
"Maybe its too early for the solid food…" Sakura mused, but before she could get up and throw away the stew, Madara grabbed her wrist.
"No. I want it," he said, his gaze off to the side as if admitting that he actually wanted to eat what she'd cooked was too much to bare. A little smile twisted Sakura's lips and she giggled quietly. The similarities between Madara and Sasuke never failed to amaze her. Sasuke had done basically the same thing when she'd offered him tomatoes.
"Okay, well open up," Sakura chirped, her eyes dancing with mirth. Madara scowled but obeyed when his stomach gave a hungry growl. Sakura couldn't help the giggle that escaped her lips. For some reason she found it funny that the Uchiha Madara could be hungry, it was almost absurd to her mind because she'd never viewed him as anything but a homicidal psycho.
Madara frowned when he heard Sakura giggle. Was she laughing at him?
No one laughed at Uchiha Madara. Ever.
"Are you laughing at me?" he asked, voice low and dark. The pinkette rolled her eyes at Madara and waved the spoon in front of his face.
"Get over yourself Uchiha, I can laugh at you if I feel like it!"
"Hn, and its Uchiha-sama." Madara scowled, but his childlike actions only increased Sakura's mirth and her shoulders shook with silent giggles as she lifted another spoonful of stew to his lips.
Madara opened his mouth to say something scathing but his stomach twinged painfully and he decided to eat and deal with the pink haired gnat after his stomach was full.
Sakura raised the spoon to Madara's lips when the door to the cell banged open and Sasuke strode in. He froze when he saw Sakura sitting on Madara's bed with a spoon held to his mouth.
Sasuke was furious. He wasted no time striding across the room and grabbing Sakura by the wrist, yanking her away from Madara.
"What do you think you are doing?" Sasuke hissed angrily, eyes narrowed as he glared at Sakura.
"I'm tending to my patient!" Sakura snapped, "What are you doing here? Visiting hours have not yet begun."
Sasuke scowled and grabbed the bowl of stew from Sakura's hands.
"Do you have to feed him?" he snapped, looking like he was going to throw a tantrum over the whole situation. Sakura sighed and rubbed her forehead, dealing with two Uchihas in one day was bound to giver her a headache.
"He's my patient Sasuke, now if you aren't here for visitation reasons please leave," Sakura said firmly, a hint of ice in her usually warm tone. She reached over and plucked the bowl from Sasuke's hands and motioned towards Madara.
"Can you manage the rest?"
Madara, who had been watching Sasuke dangerously, switched his gaze back to Sakura, his dark eyes intense. Then a wicked smirk curved his lips.
"Only if you feed me," Madara smirked, reveling in the red flush of anger that stained Sasuke's face.
Sakura didn't have the time to respond because Sasuke strode towards Madara and grabbed him by the collar of his hospital gown. Madara allowed himself to be dragged upwards, meeting Sasuke's glare with a smug stare of his own. His lack of resistance only served to agitate Sasuke further - exactly what Madara was going for.
"What do you think you are doing...uncle?" Sasuke sneered, the term of respect he had added full of mockery.
Madara grinned at Sasuke and let out a spine chilling laugh.
"What you couldn't do, that's what I'm doing."
Sasuke grit his jaw and his eyes morphed to red, Sharingan blazing as he hissed at the older Uchiha.
"You little-"
"Sasuke!" Sakura yelled, giving him a particularly hard hit over the head. "What do you think you are doing to my patient?" Sakura was furious. She just wanted to do her job but the two Uchihas insisted on pulling their childish antics around her. She'd had enough.
Sasuke stared blankly at Sakura while Madara smirked triumphantly. He wasn't sure he liked having a puny medic defending him but he definitely liked that she seemed to choose him over his pathetic nephew.
"I-" Sasuke began but Sakura pursed her lips and pointed to the door, her green eyes stormy.
"Get out. I don't want to hear it. I am a medic and you will respect my rules."
Sasuke's brow twitched then a slight blush of shame flickered across his cheeks before his face settled back to it's stoic mask.
"Hn."
He turned to exit the room, but not before Madara could get in a word edgewise.
"Nice try nephew, but as always you fail. You cannot win against me, I am your superior and your ancestor, you are but a watered down version of the Uchiha."
Sasuke clenched his fists and turned towards Madara, eyes blazing. Sakura sighed and stepped in between the two men.
"Enough, Sasuke just leave and Madara stop riling him up."
The two Uchihas glanced at the pinkette before giving in. Sasuke spun on his heel and stalked out of the cell while Madara smirked lazily at Sakura.
"But riling him up is so much fun," he drawled as he watched Sasuke stalk out the door.
"Just eat," Sakura snapped, shoving the last spoonful of the stew at Madara. He obeyed but his eyes glimmered in such a way that Sakura could feel him smirking even though he actually wasn't.
"Hn."
After Sakura washed the now empty bowl and put it on the medical tray, she turned to Madara. It was time to address the matter of the Chakra Scent technique.
"Well I said I would tell you about the technique I've been using on you…" Sakura began, licking her lips nervously as Madara watched her intensely, dark eyes unreadable.
"It's called the Chakra Scent technique. I developed it after researching the properties of medical chakra, and found out that everyone has a unique chakra scent just like they have a unique personal scent." Sakura paused, watching Madara carefully but he gave no response so she continued. "After extensive research I found out that chakra scent works like aromatherapy. If the user and receiver are compatible by nature then the effect will be stronger, and when channeled to the receiver it has a calming effect. I first tried it on some of the children at my clinic who were traumatized from the war and noticed that it worked. When you had your first episode of...well insanity I accidentally used it on you and it worked so I kept doing it.
I apologize for not asking your permission first, as that is a strict rule we medics follow by...however I used it in an emergency situation. However now that you know about it, I would ask that you sign the consent form so I can continue to use the technique to cure your mind."
Sakura let out a breath she didn't even realize she was holding after she finished her explanation. All she could do is wait for Madara to respond to the information she'd just dropped on him. The pinkette's stomach knotted as she waited for the Uchiha to acknowledge her words.
Madara felt as though someone had punched him in the gut repeatedly. The medic had been practically invading his system with her chakra, without him even knowing. He felt raw and exposed and he hated it.
The Uchiha clenched his jaw and closed his eyes as he struggled to keep his emotions under control. It wasn't just that his pride was hurt but it was as though his entire power source had been stripped away. He, the legendary Uchiha Madara had been under a Konoha maggot's spell and he hadn't even been aware. But that wasn't the worst part. What he hated the most of all was that he knew that he couldn't do without the technique.
As his dependability crossed his mind a realization hit Madara like a tonne of blocks.
Had he been feeling the intense need for the medic because of the technique? Was it the reason she had constantly been on his mind?
A searing pain ripped through Madara's chest. He felt betrayed. As if not even his feelings belonged to him anymore. What else would be wrested from him? He had no power. He had no purpose. He had no family - Sasuke didn't count when Izuna and Itachi didn't exist. He didn't have any control that counted. Now his very feelings, feelings he'd been terrified of and had just been starting to cultivate and accept, were the side effects of a jutsu meant to reign in his rapidly collapsing mental state.
He would rather be insane.
The Uchiha clenched his fists, his entire body trembling with rage. He wanted to reach out and crush the pink haired medic but at the same time he knew he couldn't do without her and that enraged him even more.
He had become weak.
This dependency seemed to be the height of his atonement...and it was working.
"You...expect me to agree to let you continue invading my mind when my chakra is sealed and I am unable to defend myself?" Madara hissed, his voice shaking slightly as he struggled to keep his rage under control. His eyes snapped open and his gaze bore through Sakura, his eyes full of black rage.
"I did not invade your mind...I couldn't even view your thoughts or anything of the sort...I could only feel the terror you were going through...which fueled my desire to use the technique," Sakura said slowly, her voice just above a whisper and her body tensed as if she expected Madara to attack her.
Madara closed his eyes again, battling with himself inside before opening them and speaking.
"I should have known that you were no different from the rest of the Konoha maggots. The consistent betrayal of this place never ceases to amaze me," Madara spat, lips curling back in a sneer.
Sakura's breath hitched in her throat at Madara's words. Being called a traitor did not settle well with her. But there was little she could do because she had used the technique without his permission. Sakura opened her mouth to reply but then she felt it.
The familiar feeling of cold darkness washed over her. She could sense that Madara was about to have a mental episode. Sakura instinctively stepped forward, hands glowing with medical chakra. But she wasn't prepared for what happened next.
Madara lunged towards her, his eyes wild with insane rage. For a split second he struggled against the restraints around his wrists then they gave way with an ominous clanging sound. His hands closed around her upper arms, his body trembling.
"You think that because you have me here locked up and ready for slaughter like the Senju did to my ancestors, you can just do whatever you like with me?" Madara hissed, his voice low and venomous. Sakura's heart thudded in her ears and she blinked rapidly, forcing herself to gather her senses.
She needed to get away.
Madara gripped Sakura's arms tighter and he let out a humourless laugh.
"I should kill you for betraying me...but I can't even do that...I can't because my chakra is sealed and I can't because my entire being is screaming out for you! Why must I need a pathetic maggot like you?!"
Madara's eyes flashed red and black marks snaked over his torso. He was unconsciously trying to deactivate the seals that kept his chakra locked away.
'Shit,' Sakura thought as she scrambled to find a way to calm down the furious Uchiha.
Sakura licked her lips and forced herself to speak.
"Uchiha-san please listen to me. I did not intend to betray you or anything like that...you were ill and as your doctor I did what I thought was right because you are my patient and I am responsible for healing you. I was only trying to help-"
"Help?" Madara hissed, his eyes flashing before he abruptly flung Sakura away from him.
"HELP? WHY DO YOU THINK YOU ARE WORTHY OF HELPING ME?" he screamed as blood leaked from his eyes as they struggled to activate his Sharingan. A hissing sound emanated from his skin as the black seal marks turned to a fiery orange, burning at the top layer of his skin as he struggled to unseal his chakra.
"Uchiha-san please stop," Sakura said gently as she got to her feet and attempted to approach Madara again. She didn't allow herself to feel fear or intimidation, she only focused on the fact that she had to help her patient.
"Don't touch me!" Madara snarled when Sakura reached out towards him.
"You need to calm down Uchiha-san, you are hurting yourself," Sakura continued, her face a calm mask even though she was a mess on the inside.
Madara erupted into a spine chilling bout of laughter then it ended as abruptly as it had begun.
"Get out before I rip the skin from your bones!" Madara snarled, but deep inside he knew he was more angry at himself than he was the pinkette. He was furious at himself for allowing himself to become dependent. He had sworn he would never depend on anyone after he'd lost Izuna and he had kept that promise throughout his lengthy lifetime...until he'd met this Haruno Sakura.
Sakura swallowed before leaping to her feet and pushing chakra into her feet so she sprung towards Madara and laid her palms on his arm before he could stop her and channeled her healing chakra into his system.
For a moment it seemed to work and Sakura was about to let herself relax when Madara yanked her hands from his arm, twisting her wrist in a mad rage. She heard the snap when her wrist was yanked away and as the pain surged through her she could tell it had been broken.
"I SAID GET OUT!" Madara roared as he flung Sakura away from him. As she hit the ground the emergency seal on the inside of her wrist activated and the guards were alerted that she'd been hurt and the rushed inside, bearing down on Madara.
Sakura could only watch through blurry vision as the guards pounced on Madara and fettered him back to the bed then added more seals to his body. He roared at them, struggling against the new restraints, his eyes wild with anger.
"You filthy Senju puppets! I will slaughter all of you!" he spat at the guards to emphasize his disgust and one of them raised their hands to perform a jutsu when Sakura forced herself to her feet and rushed in between them and Madara.
"Stop, don't hurt him, I have this under control!" Sakura panted, forcing herself to ignore the intense pain in her wrist.
"But Haruno-sama he injured your wrist," one of the guards replied, his voice filled with disgust for the Uchiha.
"I order you as the head of the medic association and as Uchiha-san's primary doctor not to lay a hand on him and exit the cell!" Sakura hissed, her eyes hard and her tone harsh.
The guards hesitated slightly before bowing respectfully and exiting the cell.
Sakura turned to Madara who had fallen silent. His eyes were closed as he struggled within himself.
"Get out...get out before I need you again and then break your other wrist," Madara said hoarsely, his voice hollow and lifeless.
"Very well, I will leave but I will come back," Sakura said softly, reaching out towards the Uchiha again only to have him turn away from her, his jaw clenched as he held back the urge to attack her.
Sakura silently gathered the medical equipment that needed to be replaced after healing her wrist then slipped out of the cell. When the door closed behind it the tension drained from her body and she slumped towards the ground, her heart thudding in her chest.
Her eyes prickled with tears as her chest heaved for breath. A myriad of emotions stormed inside of her and a soft dry sob escaped her lips.
She'd failed as a medic. But that wasn't what was making her heart ache. It was the fact that she could no longer ignore the amount of hurt Madara was going through. She definitely had not forgiven him for almost destroying her entire world but she couldn't stop her heart from reaching out towards him, she couldn't stop herself from wanting to help him, to ease his suffering and she hated herself for it. Sakura rested her head in her hands as she forced herself to focus on breathing so she wouldn't pass out. The adrenaline had begun to drain from her body and she suddenly felt weak.
As she leaned against the cell door and battled with her thoughts and feelings she didn't miss the wounded roar that Madara let out. She didn't miss the sound of his wild sobbing either.
When Sakura left the cell Madara let himself go. He screamed with rage, ripping at his throat until the metallic taste of blood filled his mouth.
Rage coursed through his body and he wanted nothing more than to go back to being dead. The moment the pink haired medic had left he'd felt the darkness descending upon him and it only increased rage and self loathing. He was so dependent on her he couldn't even do without her as soon as she left? He felt pathetic. He felt weak.
He wanted to lash out at everyone and destroy the entire world again. He wanted to burn Konoha to the ground and make Sakura feel the pain he was feeling but at the same time he could still see the fear in her eyes when he broken her wrist. Madara's heart twisted painfully and his vision was filled with red. The room was turning to blood again.
"No…" he choked out, refusing to give in to the insanity that gnawed at his mind. He couldn't need her anymore. He wouldn't let himself need her anymore.
He was not weak.
He was Uchiha Madara. He didn't need a Senju puppet.
Madara repeated the words over and over in his head, even as angry tears burned his eyes and left streaks down his face. He couldn't stop the emotions that raged within him.
He couldn't stop the tears from falling, or the rage he felt towards himself and the medic. But most of all he couldn't stop himself from needing her.
It seemed as though his atonement was to need the very person he'd tried to destroy.
AN: Tanaaan here is the next chapter! And the scene I promised to put in! review review and don't forget to suggest a scene for the next chapter! ^_^
