Can't help falling in love with you
October 1998
Dean fixed his shirt in the mirror and turned to face Garth, worrying inside his cheeks.
"What do you think?" he felt really stupid and nervous. It was the first time he would take Cas out on a real date. There was the concert thing and then a late dinner.
He had spent too much time to finally find a band that they both liked and had a concert near them. The Backstreet boys. Ok maybe Dean was just making sure Cas liked them. Whatever.
"You look good Dean, seriously! You're a handsome boy. Be your overconfident self and you will be just fine." Garth smiled. It was too sweet how he always stood by Dean even though everyone thought they were very different. Not everyone knew it, but Garth knew for sure that the bad boy picture was just a protecting wall for Dean. The kid was a very good friend, best Garth ever had. So he made sure Dean knew he cared.
"Here. I hope you have fun tonight." Garth said handing Dean the two tickets.
"Thanks Garth. I owe you big time."
"You don't owe me anything Dean. Now get going."
Dean nodded and took his wallet, leaving the room. He spent the whole way to Cas' dorm thinking about what to do that night. It had been almost 3 weeks that they were dating and they hadn't even kissed yet.
Dean tried not to overthink it. It was true that he had a reputation of getting into people's pants, but he never felt so… hard with anyone else. And after that first night, he knew he wouldn't push Cas. He was gonna wait till Cas was ready. Dean wanted Cas to trust him. So waiting it was.
But now, Dean was starting to doubt himself. Maybe Cas didn't like him like that. Maybe he just wasn't interested. Dean couldn't really blame the guy.
Cas was perfection wrapped in a human's body. He was proud and stubborn, if he wanted to do something he'd do it without any words. He was also very kind. When he got confused, he would tilt his head to side and give you the most adorable sight. And he got confused a lot. It was really cute how he knew just every sickness there ever was but didn't know who Bon Jo Vi was. Really, it was precious. And when he smiled, or much better, laughed, Dean felt his heart sink. He would give anything to make Cas laugh. Anything.
But Dean's favorite part about Cas was his eyes. They were just so… blue. When they locked eyes it felt like he was drowning in the sea. And oh if he didn't love every single second of it. Sometimes Dean felt like Cas could see right through him, like he knew just exactly what Dean was thinking at the second. And Dean loved how he could see every emotion Cas had reflect in those ocean-blue eyes.
He got to the door and knocked three times.
There was some shuffling and then Cas opened the door and there was only so much Dean could do to keep himself from gasping. Or saying something stupidly girly.
He was wearing a pair of pretty tight jeans, that very much showed up his perfect ass, and a blue button-down. It matched his perfect eyes. And his hair, it was so messy yet cute. It looked like he had just spent the last 10 minutes making out with a touchy bastard.
"Hey Cas." Dean finally managed to get out.
Castiel smiled evilly and closed the door behind him.
"Hello Dean. Where are we going tonight?"
Dean took a deep breath and cursed himself inwardly for having so little control over himself. Cas was enjoying teasing Dean. He could swear that his cheeks were burning red.
"Uh, we're going to the…uh…concert thingie… Backstreet boys. You like them right?"
Castiel nodded and motioned for Dean to start walking. He tried very hard not to start screaming. They had tickets for Backstreet boys. Cas had been dying to go watch them. Though he had never said it out loud and now he wondered how the hell did Dean know.
"We're taking my car, if that's ok with you?"
Castiel smiled and nodded taking his hand. Dean would totally deny the flip of his heart in his chest.
"Sounds good to me. Let's go."
It was really weird how Dean had absolutely no idea how the time passed and how he drove the two of them to the concert. It was like he was in a deep sleep, or watching everything behind a curtain. He was just so distracted by his beautiful boyfriend. He was hyper aware of the guy's every act and everything else seemed to be blurry to his eyes and ears.
"We're here." He said as he parked his car in the parking lot and opened the door. Cas got out too, looking around at the crowded space.
"Where are we?" he asked.
Dean took another look at their tickets to make sure and thanked Garth again in his head.
"Second row." He said with a smug grin.
Castiel faced him and gave him the most adorable surprised face there ever was.
"Seriously? I guess there ARE benefits to dating Dean Winchester after all. That must have cost you a fortune." He said with a smirk and started walking towards the park's entry, Dean following him.
"Hey! There is much more benefit to it than just tickets you asshole!" He protested.
"Yeah? Like what? Being called asshole?"
Dean pulled his best "Fuck you" face and stuck out his tongue.
"Well you'd know it by now if you weren't taking everything so slow! I'm a very good kisser and pretty amazing in bed."
Castiel laughed and Dean tried really hard not to show how proud of himself he was.
"Yeah I'm sure you are Dean. Now please let's just go get to our place before you can get any further on that topic."
It was great and Dean was really proud of himself. Cas seemed to be enjoying the night and so was Dean. Aside from the fact that he was out with Cas, he found himself not hating the boy band. They were kinda good.
The song "As long as you love me" came on and Cas screamed "I love this song" at Dean and then started laughing. Dean would swear the night couldn't get any better than that.
Cas started singing along with the song and he sounded really out of tune. Dean was laughing harder than he remembered he had in a long time.
"I Don't care, who you are. Where you're from
Don't care what you did, as long as you love me…"
Dean was singing along by the time they hit the second chorus and Cas stared at him like he'd seen a ghost.
"What?" he said, feeling like he was made out of paper and Cas had laser eyes.
"Nothing you just… you have a really good voice Dean."
Dean felt himself blushing and turned to face the stage where the five young men were jumping up and down.
"You know… I wish I could do this too… singing I mean. Performing…"
He had no idea why he had said those words. If it was any other situation he would curse himself. But he kinda didn't mind that Cas now knew his biggest secret.
Cas, to Dean's utter surprise didn't pick on the topic and looked at the stage again. Dean told himself that he wouldn't let this ruin their night and started making crazy noises that made Cas laugh.
It felt like Dean could do anything if he had that laugh by his side.
"Who's your favorite?" He asked as they were walking back towards his car.
Castiel blushed looking away.
"Nick. He's both handsome and he also has a great voice. He reminds me of…" and then Cas cut off blushing a deep red.
"Who?" Dean asked completely oblivious to Cas' discomfort.
"Uh…never mind." Cas said getting in the car. Dean frowned and got in.
"Where are we going from here Dean?" Castiel asked.
"Uh… well I was thinking we could go to this place I know… but we need to get food then go…"
He could feel himself blush. Dammit Dean, you're a big boy. It's totally uncool to blush.
"Sure Dean, tonight is yours to make it last." Cas said in a tone that made Dean think of Shakespeare.
"Don't mock me Novak!"
"You had it coming Winchester."
Dean couldn't help but laugh.
They stopped at the McDonalds and got two cheeseburgers to go.
"Where are we going Dean? You're not gonna murder me or anything, are you?"
Dean chuckled softly. "Relax Cas. We're almost there." He said before pulling into a side road and parking the Impala.
Cas looked up and his breath got caught in his chest when he saw the beautiful view.
They were at the top of a big cliff that Cas had no idea was even so close to their town.
"Dean… this is beautiful…"
Dean smiled clearly proud of himself.
"Come on, let's get eating… I have another surprise for you after we eat."
Castiel looked like he wanted to push to find out what the surprise was but Dean gave him a look that meant he better wait.
Truth is Dean had been really worried about this part of his plan before but after what happened in the concert he had more trust in it now.
He had no idea how he ate his sandwich. He was deeply drowned in their conversation.
"Come on, you are kidding me right? how can you not know who the Styx are?"
"Well it's easy Dean, I actually live in this decade."
Dean pulled his best bitch face, knowing Sam would be proud of him if he saw it.
"Well then I guess I just have to take you back in time, huh?"
"Can't you just make peace with the fact that you like classic rock and I don't?"
"Dude, have you even given it a try?"
Castiel shrugged.
"Thought so! We will start with the best. I promise you are going to love them!"
Castiel thought it was so cute how Dean turned to an 8 year old when it came to classic rock bands. Being excited and high on happiness really suited his boyfriend. It made it all the much harder for Cas to stay away from that tempting eyes and lips.
He was dying to feel those full lips and taste Dean, see those apple green eyes get dark with lust. But truth is he was afraid of falling for Dean. After all he was Dean Winchester and everyone knew Dean never stayed with anyone after sex. He couldn't go in this unless he was sure Dean wanted him.
After they spent another half an hour on the colors each one liked and the food, they were done with their late dinner.
"Ok, now am I going to know what's your surprise?" Castiel asked playing bothered and impatient.
Dean smirked walking towards his baby and opened its trunk.
"Castiel, say hello to Cherry." He said as he took out the classic guitar.
Castiel was awed. The instrument was so beautiful. Just like its owner, it shined. It was like it wasn't a normal guitar.
"Dean… I did not know you could play guitar."
Dean smirked. Cherry had never let him down before and he was hoping Cas would fall for his voice. Apparently the boy wasn't that attracted by Dean's physical beauty. Dean was sure if this didn't work he had to give up on Cas. It's not like he had a personality to count on.
The question is would he ever be able to give up on those blue eyes? He was pretty sure he'd go through hell to change himself just so that Cas wanted him.
But it was more than just the blue eyes… Cas had given Dean a chance. No one had ever done that for him. Not even himself. And Cas had trusted him. Well, at least had tried to. And Dean didn't wanna let him down. He couldn't let the only guy who'd seen him beyond the badboy cover down.
That was kinda the whole point behind his song, wasn't it?
"You know... I was never good in making my own music, never! But then… then here you are and I think I just found my muse. I wrote a song for you."
It just hit Dean there how cheesy that actually sounded.
Shit.
"Uh… ok that was cheesy. Well… I think I better stop talking and just play you the song."
What Dean didn't know was that Cas wasn't silent because he thought Dean was acting stupid.
Dean had actually written him a song. A freaking song. Someone was yelling "Holy crap" inside Cas' head.
He didn't make any sound while Dean was making sure Cherry was in tune and started the happy notes.
Dean was pretty sure his shirt was getting dark with his sweats. He couldn't remember ever being so nervous.
"Love, I don't think so
I'd have to be a fool to go down that road
Aw, but look at you, look at you, look at you
I'd be crazy not to
I know, it makes no sense
Why would I jump off a perfectly good cliff
Aw, but look at you, look at you, look at you
I'd be crazy not to
My best bet is turn around and run
And not get all caught up in your love
My friends say I'm crazy if I do
Aw, but look at you, look at you, look at you
Oh, I'd be crazy not to
My heart, is telling me stay
Like maybe I should take a chance and have faith
Aw, and look at you, look at you, look at you
Baby, I'd be crazy not to
My best bet is turn around and run
And not get all caught up in your love
My friends say I'm crazy if I do
Aw, but look at you, look at you, look at you
Oh, I'd be crazy not to, baby, I'd be crazy not to
I know if I kiss you
It's only gonna lead to
More and more, and more, and more
So my best bet is turn around and run
And not get all caught up in your love
My friends say I'm crazy if I do
Aw, but look at you, look at you, look at you
Yeah, look at you, look at you, look at you
I'd be crazy not to, crazy not to"
Dean wasn't sure if those lyrics actually told Cas how much he wanted to kiss the guy… and do all the other stuff.
Cas was still silent when Dean placed his guitar back in its case.
And MUCH closer than he had been before the song had started. Totally in Dean's personal space. And that was more than ok with Dean. well except that he didn't know if he was supposed to lean the rest of the way and kiss those lips or not. He had fallen once before for Cas' trick and he didn't wanna make a fool out of himself again.
His mind so worked up with his thoughts that he didn't feel Cas move until his pink lips were brushing his.
Castiel was sure he was a fool for waiting this long. Nothing he had dreamed of was slightly close to this feeling. It felt like watching the fireworks for the first time. And it was only a brush of lips.
Then Dean moved his hand on Cas' back and placed it on his neck pulling him more to himself, tilting his head in a more comfortable position and captured Cas' lips with his taking control. He was so happy his mind had an auto pilot for kissing. Really. He was sure he was experiencing a heart attack. Cas' lips felt amazing between his… just perfect… it made Dean crave for more.
Cas was sure not even heaven would make him so light headed. He had no control over his body anymore. All he felt was Dean's lips sucking on his own. And then Dean's tongue was brushing his lips apart, begging for entrance and all Cas could do was let him.
Dean pushed his tongue in Cas' now open mouth and brushed every corner, memorized his teeth, and tangled their tongues. Cas's mouth was so warm and welcoming. It felt so pure. So clean. Dean was sure he had never felt anything like what he was feeling at that moment.
Cas moaned when Dean tugged a little at his hair making Dean suck a his tongue. Dean tasted like chocolate and mint. He tasted like summer. Like green apples. He tasted all the good things Cas hadn't had in years.
Then Dean pulled away leaning his forehead to Cas'.
"Shit… that was… you're…" Dean gave up on finding a word and just brushed Cas' lips with his fingers.
Only after a couple of minutes they were back to breathing normal. Now that they knew how it felt they both just wanted to jump on the other and kiss each other till they were out of breath.
Dean was biting his lips really hard so that he could resist saying or doing something he'd regret later. Or really girly.
They just stood there looking at each other, going though every little detail. It was only then that Cas noticed the beautiful line of freckles on Dean's tanned face. It took him all the power he had not to start kissing the line.
"You're beautiful…" he whispered mostly to himself. He was trying to understand why Dean wanted him. why of all the people he had chosen Cas?
Dean blushed deeply and felt his cheeks on fire. God Cas was turning him to such a girl.
But all Cas could think of was how the blush made Dean's green eyes stand out even more than before. Those long lashes, the beautiful line of his brows. It was breath taking.
He felt he couldn't resist anymore and leaned forward to brush his lips against Dean one more time, but Dean's phone chose that exact moment to start ringing.
"Shit." Dean mumbled taking his phone out of his jeans pocket making Cas see a flash of tanned skin. He smirked inwardly knowing this had worked. He and Cas, they belonged together, it was just meant to be and Dean could care less at that moment if it all sounded so girly.
"We should get back. I set my alarm for 11 so I can get you back to the dorm before you get in trouble. Plus I know you like to wake up early and I thought you shouldn't sleep late so…" His babbling was cut off by the sound of Cas laughing.
"What?" he asked not knowing what was so funny.
"Nothing just… I don't know… it's kinda cute that you don't want me to get in trouble!" he air quoted the 'trouble' making his point.
Dean shrugged and turned around trying to hide his blush. What the hell Dean? just keep your girly self together for another hour. For the love of fuck.
"Let's get back, what do you say?"
Castiel just nodded still smiling and helped gathering their trash as Dean put their stuff back in the trunk. The ride back was mostly silent, nothing said, just the AC/DC playing their "Shook me all night long".
"Who's this?" Cas asked after half an hour of silence.
"AC/DC." Dean said pleased that Cas was interested. He knew the guy had some rock in his bones.
Castiel nodded and grinned.
"I like them."
"You betcha ass you do dude. AC/DC rules."
And that sent Cas to a full on laughter making Dean feel butterflies in his stomach.
They didn't say anything else till he pulled over in front of Cas' dorm.
"Here we are exactly 10 minutes to midnight. That's not so bad if you ask me." Dean said not knowing what to do. Well this was awkward as fuck.
Then Castiel leaned forward and kissed his cheek.
"Thanks for tonight Dean, and thanks for the song. I had so much fun." He said with a smile and then got out of the car leaving a shocked Dean in the car.
