This'll be quite a treat. Special thanks to Rapture at Sea for looking over and amping up this chapter. Thanks for the beta!
Sorry this one took so long, I had a ton of stuff going on... but I'm sure this will make up for it ;)
Enjoy:
(-Blu-)
The sun had lowered considerably by the time we finally left the old club. Tasting the salt in the air again excited me. It was a defining characteristic of Rio, being right next to the sea and all. For it was in Rio I knew that soon, I'd be in the club scene again.
Memories and tidbits of previous experiences zipped through my head and lifted my heart to another degree of excitement and anticipation. I was about damn ready to let myself go, to wash away the layers of stress and sadness that blanketed my consciousness and sent me into lamentation.
The lights, the smells, the sounds… man oh man the sounds were the best! The music and beats that pulsed through your entire being, that fueled you to let go of yourself and leave all doubt behind, to dance all night long. But…
But I also saw her... images of the angel who was once my mate manifesting in my head again. Would the dancing truly aid my spirit?
"You okay, Blu?" Nico called out as he noticed my pace had slowed up considerably.
Breaking out of my trance, I readjusted my eyes, rolling them around in my head before opening them again. "Uh," I coughed once to clear up the film from the back of my throat, "Yeah, sorry. I'm… fine." I stated, giving my wings a few powerful beats to catch up to the duo leading me to my destination.
"Ya kinda zoned out there, Blu," Pedro warned. "Are ya sure you're OK?"
"Yeah, I'm okay. Don't worry about me," I stuttered out in my old familiar tone. "It's just..." I started again in a more solemn tone, "I... I need to get away from this nightmare that I'm trapped in."
"Hey Blu bird," Nico piped in again, "We understand. We got you. Speaking of getting away, we're already here."
Nico gestured towards an old, decrepit alley way void of any human life or activity. The alley itself was long abandoned, and the surrounding buildings, I suspected, were deserted warehouses. Regardless of the distasteful atmosphere, this was prime real estate for clubs of the avian type.
Banking sharply on a sudden gust, Nico and Pedro angled down towards the path. Following their quick turn, I lowered myself down towards the strip of ground as well.
When I reached the turf, I instantly recognized the powerful beat. There was definitely a club here. Nico jogged a short ways ahead and approached a small ragged cloth nailed to the wall. Reaching out with one wing, he pulled back the cloth and bowed towards me and Pedro. "After you," he called with a sweep of his sun-yellow appendage.
I shot him a quick smiled and walked in. I heard Pedro give a small snicker behind me at Nico's gesture and the two slapped wings.
Everything I was hoping for and more I found on the inside of this old building. The wild music filled my entire being, the crazy, flashing lights appealing to my sense of sight. The unique smells, which here were a musky, smoky haze in the air that wasn't necessarily appealing, held their own nostalgic value.
I sure as heck was in the right place.
Relaxing myself instantly, I paced around the outer edge of the club, walking past many tables filled with various species of the avian type. The dance floor flourished with life as the countless multihued bodies blended together in a rainbow of waving colors, flickering vividly in sync with the beat. I closed my eyes for a second or two, taking in the stimulation and inhaling a deep breath.
Well, here I am. Time to party.
Figuring I'd hit up the bar first to intoxicate my mind and body, I plodded on over and took a seat right in front of the bartender.
The bar itself was located on the opposite side of the entrance. The dance floor was in the shape of a large semi-circle facing the stage which held a DJ booth. On the outer ring of the club, many tables and booths lay scattered across the area sanctioned for sitting. None of the tables really matched, but no one seemed to mind the badly-chosen decor one bit. After all, that's not why people were here to begin with. And besides, the out-of-control lights emanating sporadically from the DJ booth were insane enough to please any wasted bird.
The bartender noticed me almost instantly. "Whatcha be having?" he asked in a deep, gruff voice.
"Start me off with a heavy lemon bomb," I replied back. Lemon wasn't necessarily my favorite, but I wasn't about to order anything that would remind me of…
The toucan who ran the bar mumbled something as he turned around to whip up my drink. Shifting my gaze out to the dance floor again, I held a wider and higher view than before. I could see clear to the other side of the room, in fact. The tops of birds' heads bobbed up and down as my eyes surveyed the floor. As my eyes fixated on the mass of birds, I started to pick up on a small trend. Many of the birds danced in pairs of two, twirling their partners around during many of the drops in the beat. It amazed me watching how well synced every bird danced with the music. They interacted almost like clockwork, never once missing a step or fouling their rhythm. However, any lone participants seemed few and far between.
"Here's your drink," I heard a gruff voice behind me call. The resounding clack of the glass on the table furthered his statement as I turned to be greeted by a small yellow beverage. Sizing it up, I looked over it carefully, sucking in a quick whiff that filled my head with the stinging aroma of lemons. Eagerly I placed one wing on the cup, bringing it up to my beak. Taking a small sip, I tilted the concoction down towards my beak. A drop of the sour juice swamped over my tongue and slipped down my throat, causing my face to contort. Licking my beak, I picked up a small bit of sweetness after the initial rush of sour.
Satisfied, I tossed the liquid straight down my throat, gulping it down rather fast. Immediately I regretted doing so, as a burning sensation enveloped my throat. The alcohol was intensely strong and acidic, and I coughed twice into my wing as it singed my throat. I then inhaled and exhaled deeply, soothing my irritated insides. After a short amount of time, a slight buzz replaced the burn and I returned my attention to the site of the endless motion.
Every bird out there seemed so ecstatic and happy, which contagiously rubbed off onto me and possessed me.
With a delusional smile on my face, I climbed down from the bar stool, the pounding of my heart in alignment with the thudding bass.
I could feel the tune in my heart and the samba in my soul, and I could not get enough. Ambling my way towards the entrance of the dance floor, I froze and whirled around.
I spied a Military Macaw couple at one table making out, eyes sealed shut and beaks locked together as they drowned themselves in bliss. At another table in the far corner, a Hyacinth Macaw couple cuddled and rested their heads on each other, both content with merely being in close proximity to their soul-mate.
I was petrified, glued to the spot by my own unrelenting loneliness. The constant revelation playing over and over again in my subconscious gave way to a blinding sudden surge of realization. Their worlds must be perfect, their lives complete. They're all at ease, treasuring and showing the utmost affection for each other. And yet, here I am, stripped of the only bird that ever cared for me and showed me love. They have it all… all they could ever want and need… and I am left with nothing. There's no reason for me to even be here on Earth, to waste precious oxygen and take up precious space. Without Jewel... there's no reason for me… to even exist.
Many times I've pondered the meaning of life, and every time I arrived at the same answer. Life only holds as much meaning and worth as an individual places upon it. And in my situation, life held no residual value to me. Life held no meaningful worth, as I had no one to hold me and love me.
A sickening sensation clogged my airway, and my stomach flipped end over end as immense pangs of hurt and loss ravaged me from head to tail. In the exact moment in which I turned to metaphorical stone, I realized how trivial and meaningless a club actually was. There was no joy inherent in dancing when you were by yourself. All it did was create a false sense of belonging that was as fragilet as a thin sheet of glass.
Sobering up in a matter of seconds, I dashed all my hopes of improving my mood and sulked my way out the door.
What's the point of fighting and surviving without you, Jewel? What purpose does my life have? What can l do to make myself remotely happy or help my soul escape the trauma? Is it my fate to wake up in solitude every day for the rest of my life, always suffering your loss? What other future could I possibly experience?
My breathing intensified and my chest shuddered as I exhaled painfully. The dank, chilled walkway mirrored how I felt on the inside. Such a place is perfect for someone like me...
It was full dark at this time, as the last few rays of light having been extinguished during the duration of my stay inside the hell house. The omnipotent moon shone in a pleading manner above my head.
Bemoaning my fragmented self, I took to the sky. Tears leaked out of my eyes as I departed the earth, robbing me of my will to fly anywhere.
Rising to the peak of the building, I soared a block away, distancing myself from the facade that Nico and Pedro immersed themselves in. Touching down on a ledge, I drew in another labored breath that forced more tears out of my eyes. Jewel, can you explain why I should even bother staying alive?
Resting my head on my wings, I stared up. The moon shone down brightly, and in return I drilled my gaze into the silvery beams. Its hypnotizing qualities captivated me as my mind wandered off into the epitome of sadness.
Drops of moonshine sparkled in every tear that left my face and dropped through the air, each sphere of liquid exploding into nothingness on the coarse rooftop. And with each passing minute that I peered into the core of the Moon's everlasting glow, my heart exploded too.
(~Annabelle~)
What's with birds these days? Why does it seem that, as time goes on, the morality of society becomes more and more corrupt? What ever happened to the sensible birds that always held meaningful notions higher than their selfish desires?
Roy serves as a perfect example of this. All he cares about is himself, his own personal desires and goals. He wanted to be the center of the universe, and was damn good at manipulating others to help him do just that. How could Aley buy into that group of birds? Could she not see through the lies and the deceit? How could she submerge herself in such bigotry, such trash, such immoral, delusional crap?
I hope, for her sake, Sam is different. I really do...
I rocked my feet where I sat, bathing in the wash of illumination from the Earth's companion. Did the moon feel isolated with no stars around to travel with it on its journey through the inky blackness of space? Or was it too proud and vain to care? Not a single pinpoint shone in the sky, and yet, the full moon reliably painted Rio with grace and beauty.
Maybe I'll hold fast to what I know and believe is right, never falling prey to the ill-intentioned wishes of others. I'll uphold my morals and standards to the very end, whether society curses me or not. Mainstream society and all of its introspective cravings can just ignore me. I'll be the odd one out amidst the enormous crowd of beings seduced by degradation and immorality.
A small patch of warmth filled my heart as I claimed a victory over the sinful world in which I lived. Come hell or high water, I will never lose my grip on my sanity on this crazy planet.
The wind ever so slightly caressed my feathers with its silky touch, tickling my sides and disturbing my tail harmlessly. Closing my eyes, I flopped onto my back, listening to the serene sound of the wind as it breathed.
Why can't there be more nobility and goodness on Earth than greed and evil?
Again the wind picked up, howling ever so faintly. It was on this particular night that the wind whispered to me, and I embraced the magical noise. But I listened deeper, I soon realized that it wasn't quite the wind that was howling.
Rotating my head towards the direction of the sound, I strained my sense of hearing intently. Low, rolling sobs echoed from the far end of the warehouse district. I opened my eyes as the epiphany hit, curiosity driving me to my talons.
Another round of sobs I heard, and this time I was certain it was some bird crying. It had to be...
I searched the rooftops for source of the hollow whimpering, but even with the moon's radiance I was having trouble locating the bird that was creating it.
I deftly rose into the air as silently as I could, focusing extra hard to determine from which direction the sound was loudest. I battled the breeze and flew off in said direction.
I increased my altitude to fly over a larger, more broken-down building. In doing so, I caught a glimpse of a dark figure, perched on a rooftop slightly ahead of me.
It wasn't in my nature to leave a creature in such distress, so I dived down towards the dark blue lump.
As I gradually glided down, it became apparent that the figure was of the avian denomination, namely a male macaw, as I figured from his body shape and masculine cries.
Gee, he sounds torn up. Wonder what happened to make him so sad… I thought as I perched down behind him silently. He was too absorbed with spewing out tears to have noticed me, so I took a deep breath and announced my presence.
"Hey, are you okay?" I asked in a hushed tone. The macaw shuddered and wiped some tears from his face, sniffling as more rushed in to replace them.
"No... I am too wounded… to ever… be okay…" he mumbled as he bent his head and studied his limp feet.
"You want to tell me what's wrong?" I questioned as sympathetically as I could.
The macaw sniffed desperately and rubbed his face hard with one wing. I saw the halves of his beak split apart as he formed a reply. "Do you have... any idea… how hard it is… to lose… that one special macaw… that you loved… with all your heart?" His voiced constantly cracked as he fought to talk properly and maintain his composure. My heart dropped clear to my stomach, and I sincerely felt sorry for him.
"No," I said guiltily, "I can't say that I do. I've never loved anyone so deeply. I've never had a family..." I felt awful and pitied myself, but I pitied this poor male even more.
I approached him slowly, placing one wing on his back and hoping he wouldn't reject it. He didn't push it off, so I continued, "I can't relate, stranger. I can't possibly imagine the pain you're going through. But perhaps I can try. Do you care to tell me her name?"
"Je-Jewel..." he moaned. For some reason, his tone leveled out and blew out a heavy sigh.
"Jewel, huh? That sounds… familiar," I admitted as I closed my eyes, scouring my brain for any recollection or memory of a Jewel. Whoever she was, she sure did a number on this macaw, leaving him and all...
A mutual silence enveloped us for a minute or two before I heard him remark depressingly, "Everything in this city... is a trigger. I try to get away, I try to find some peace, but I just can't. She was my one true love… my everything… and now she's gone…" The macaw paused for a moment as his chest heaved in and out. "I... I can't figure out why… I should forget her… and move on. Everyone says… that I need to… if I want to heal… but I can't let go of her."
My heart sank again and I felt tears threaten to swamp my own eyes. Taking a seat next to the macaw, I gazed at the side of his face. "Is it true what they say?" I asked innocently. In my peripheral vision, I saw him glance at me for a split second.
"Is what true?" he asked as he sniffled again.
"That it's better to have loved and lost… than to never have loved at all?"
"No!" The macaw exclaimed hoarsely. His response was so unexpected that I gave a small flinch. In a tiny voice he added, "It can't be. I never knew what love was… until Jewel poured it onto me… and when she was taken… her love vanished. I will never recover… from the pain… of being starved... of her affection. I will never be the same. I will never be cheerful again."
"I may not know much... but... what about all the good times that you've had? What about..." I surveyed his features for the first time, "The love that you two shared?"
He only had the willpower to lock eyes with me for an instant, and then he shied away in despair. "I... I don't know. I… I miss her so much."
Studying his features one thing became clear. He was no Hyacinth Macaw or Lear's Macaw. Oh no... he looked just like me!
"Your face..." I whispered, "Are you… a Spix's macaw?" I asked incredulously as I studied his face closer.
"Yes. My name... is Blu."
"Blu!" I gasped as I almost toppled over. "Oh my gosh, Blu! I've heard about what happened to you... and Jewel."
He gave me a sour look. "And I've heard about you too... sending friends to try and win me over. You're exactly the reason I'm so hurt. No one will let me be…"
Sending friends? Oh! He's thinking about those two military macaws...
"No no no!" I exclaimed defensively, "I'm not like that... they were just... I don't know what they were doing. But I didn't send them."
Blu just shook his head in dismissal. "Blu… I would never try and steal your heart from Jewel, even though she... left you," I said in a somber voice.
I took another deep breath. "But... I'm sorry you're suffering the way you are... is there some way I can help?"
"Unless you can bring Jewel back to me, then no. But I do appreciate your company." Rising to his feet, Blu looked down at me again. "What's your name?"
"Annabelle... but friends call me Anna."
"Annabelle," Blu muttered. "Thank you... I guess. It was nice talking, but I need to head back into the forest."
"I... I'll see you around then?" I asked in a small voice.
"Maybe. Goodbye, Anabelle." With those last words, Blu lifted off towards the vast jungle. He flapped four times to gain altitude, and was swallowed up by the night.
"Goodbye, Blu," I called, but he was nowhere to be seen.
It wasn't until after he had left and silence had taken over again that I realized how stressed the encounter had made me. I felt genuinely sorry for the broken bird. Giving off a few shudders, I took my own leave and sped off on my beating wings. Aley can fend for herself I can always meet up with her tomorrow. I just want to get home...
With the thought of the poor, broken bird in my mind, I flew to the depths of the jungle, back to my solace and my own hollow. Well, today sure turned out to be heartbreaking and terrible…
Hope you guys liked it!
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