A/N: See Chapter 1 for Disclaimer.
Chapter 7: Intervention
"How much longer could they possibly take?" asked a very worried Hyacinth in the hospital waiting room. "It's been hours."
Hyacinth, Richard, and Emmet had been anxiously waiting for news of Elizabeth for quite a long while now, and Daisy, Onslow, Rose, the vicar, and his wife were all there with them as well.
"Try not to worry so, Hyacinth," Richard kindly told his wife. "I'm sure someone will let us know something soon."
"I just can't believe it," said Daisy sadly. "Liz was doing so well. She was almost at her second trimester, and then this happens."
"This is like reliving a nightmare," Emmet sighed. "I was with Liz when she had her last miscarriage. It was absolutely awful. But what happened this time was even worse. I just can't believe she's going through this again."
Rose dabbed her wet eyes with a tissue then and said, "It's heartbreaking. It's just heartbreaking. Elizabeth's such a wonderful mother to go through all of this for her daughter."
"You know what I hate about all of this?" asked Onslow.
"What?" said Daisy.
"I hate how helpless I feel. Elizabeth's really been going through hell ever since her daughter was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago, and now this happens to her, and there's not a thing any of us can do to make it any better."
"You took the words right out of my mouth, Onslow," Emmet agreed. "My sister's really been incredible through this whole thing. She's been so strong for Gail, and for the baby. All her other miscarriages really tore her up. I know this one will, too, and there is nothing in the world I can do about it."
"Being a clergyman, people automatically look to me to have the perfect words to say in times like these," said the vicar. "Unfortunately, I've always come up short in that area. Oh, I can write and preach a nice sermon every Sunday, but when people come up to me and ask me why God allows terrible things like this to happen, I just don't have any answers. Well, not any answers that would give a lot of comfort, anyway. I personally believe that God allows us to experience trials in our lives, even brutally painful trials, to build up character and perseverance in His born-again children through Christ. But even though trials can and do build up character and perseverance in the long-run, the knowledge of that fact doesn't always make things easier in the short-term. I doubt telling Elizabeth something like that would make her feel any better right now."
"Sometimes it's not about having any so-called 'perfect words' to say, Michael," said Rachel. "Sometimes it's simply about…just being there. Sometimes that's all a person really needs from their loved ones. They just need to have someone there who will hold their hand. Someone who will listen. Someone who will give them a hug and a shoulder to cry on."
"How right you are, my darling," Michael said lovingly, and then he took his wife's hand and kissed it.
In that moment, Elizabeth's daughter Gail and her Aunt Maggie came in, and Emmet walked over and met them.
"We got here as soon as we could," said Maggie.
"Uncle Emmet, how's Mum?" asked Gail, who was fighting off tears.
"We don't know yet. The doctors are still with her. Hopefully we'll know something soon."
"Did she definitely lose the baby, or does the baby still have a chance?" Gail inquired.
Emmet shook his head sadly and explained to his young niece, "Your mother lost a very great deal of blood, Gail. I think it's highly unlikely that the baby survived."
"Oh no," said Maggie.
"Poor Mum. This'll really kill her."
"Why don't you both come over here and sit down?" Emmet suggested, and then they nodded and followed him over to where everybody else was sitting.
After sitting together and waiting for about another twenty minutes in complete silence, a short, slim, redheaded lady in scrubs appeared.
"Excuse me," she said. "Are you all with Elizabeth Warden?"
"Yes," Emmet immediately responded, and then he got up from his seat and approached her, and so did all the others. "I'm Emmet Hawksworth, her brother. How is she?"
"Yes, do tell us what is going on," Hyacinth demanded.
"I'm Dr. Adams. Mrs. Warden has been through a terrible ordeal today. She hemorrhaged, which happens sometimes with a miscarriage. She lost a dangerous amount of blood and we had to give her several blood transfusions. Her condition is very serious right now, but not critical. We'll be keeping her in the hospital for at least the next few days or so to keep a close eye on her. If she takes good care of herself and gets plenty of rest, she should make a full recovery, but it'll take several weeks."
"I'll see to it that she does," said Hyacinth.
"Thank you, doctor," Gail said quietly.
"It'll be at least a couple of hours before she'll be up to having visitors," Dr. Adams informed them.
"Very well. We can all leave and come back then," said the vicar.
"You guys can go back home if you want. I'm staying," Gail announced.
"Aunt Maggie, do you want me to take you back to the house?" asked Emmet.
"No thank you, Emmet. I'll stay here with Gail and wait to see Liz."
"I'll stay and wait, too," said Hyacinth.
Everybody else agreed that they would leave and come back later, and after exchanging a bit of small talk with the others, they said goodbye and left, and Dr. Adams left to see to her next patient.
It was about three hours later that Liz was allowed visitors. Emmet, Gail, and Maggie went in to see her first, but she was still pretty out of it, so they didn't stay with her long. Then Hyacinth and Richard went into Elizabeth's room to see her, and when they did, they were both frightened and heartbroken. Liz looked so weak and fragile, and due to the blood loss, her complexion was as white as the hospital sheets. She had an IV in her arm through which she was receiving yet more blood, and she was buried underneath a pile of hospital blankets.
"Oh, Richard," said Hyacinth as she choked on a sob.
"I know," Richard whispered sadly.
Hyacinth then pulled herself together, walked up to Elizabeth's bedside, sat down in the chair next to the bed, and put a loving hand on top of Elizabeth's head. In that moment, Liz opened her eyes.
"It's me, love," Hyacinth warmly whispered to her friend. "I'm right here with you now, and so is Richard. You just close your eyes and rest now, my sweet girl. Just rest."
"My baby," Liz gasped as tears started streaming down her face, and Hyacinth struggled not to break down and cry with her.
"I know, sweetheart. I know it hurts so badly inside right now. I know. But even though it's hard, please, try not to think about that right now. You mustn't upset yourself now, love. It's very important that you relax and take it easy now."
"I've failed Gail."
"You've done no such thing. None of this was your fault, my dear girl. There are just some things in life that happen that are simply beyond our control. Please, try not to think about it. Not now. Just try to put it all out of your mind and get some rest."
After digging a tissue out of her purse, Hyacinth dried Elizabeth's eyes with it and a couple of moments later, she drifted off to sleep again. A few minutes later, Hyacinth and Richard left her room so she could rest.
When Hyacinth and Richard made their way back to the hospital lobby on the first floor, they bumped into Gail, Emmet, and Maggie once again. As soon as Hyacinth saw that the young girl had tears in her eyes, her heart really did ache for her.
"Oh, love," Hyacinth said sympathetically, and then she pulled Gail into her arms and gave her a long hug.
As soon as the embrace ended, Gail complained through her tears, "I told Mum she shouldn't go through with this. I told her it was too dangerous to her health to attempt another pregnancy. She could have died so easily. She should have listened to me and just left it alone. Why did she have to be so stubborn?"
Hyacinth responded by tenderly brushing a few loose strands of hair back behind Gail's ear and telling her in a warm voice, "Because your mother loves you more than anything else in the world. Because your life is dearer to her than her own."
Again, Gail broke down and cried, and Hyacinth hugged her a second time. As Hyacinth embraced her, she said, "Oh, sweet girl. I know how worried you are about your mum. You're such a wonderful daughter." In the next moment, their embrace ended, and Hyacinth told her, "Now listen to me, love. You cannot allow yourself to get so upset. You have to take care of your own health, too. Now I want you to go home with your Uncle Emmet and your Aunt Maggie and get something to eat and get some rest. We have to take care of ourselves so we can be strong for Mum, now, don't we?"
Gail nodded, and then Emmet, who was standing right behind them, put his hand on his niece's shoulder and told her gently, "Hyacinth's right, my dear. Your mother's sleeping now. It's best that we go home and let her rest."
Gail nodded a second time, and then Maggie lovingly wrapped her arm around her shoulders and began walking out of the hospital with her. As soon as they left, Emmet turned to Hyacinth for a quick moment and told her seriously, "Thank you for all your help today, Hyacinth."
Hyacinth simply nodded, and after saying goodbye to her and Richard, Emmet turned around and left.
Naturally, the first thing Hyacinth did when she and Richard got home was to clean the kitchen floor. After she did that, she changed all the bedding. Finally, she cooked supper for Richard and herself, and they ate together at their kitchen table in almost complete silence. It was obvious the day had taken its toll on both of them, Hyacinth especially.
Just as they were finishing up their meal, Hyacinth said quietly, "There was so much blood."
"Yes, but it's all gone now. You got the kitchen looking spotless again," said Richard, trying to sound encouraging.
"That's not what I meant. Elizabeth hemorrhaged, Richard. At her age, it's a miracle this miscarriage didn't kill her. She could have died, Richard. Elizabeth could have died so easily."
"But she didn't. The doctor said that as long as she got plenty of rest and took care of herself, she'd make a full recovery within a few weeks. I know what happened to Liz really scared you. It scared me as well. But she's going to be alright. It's just going to take some time."
"I know. It's just so hard not to worry. Liz still has some frozen embryos left. What if, after she recovers, she tries this again in the hopes of having a child who will be a match for Gail? It could kill her, Richard. Elizabeth could die. She really could die if she makes another attempt at a pregnancy."
"Let's not jump to conclusions. We don't know that Elizabeth will necessarily try again to get pregnant once she's recovered."
"She's a mother, Richard. She's not thinking about herself or her own health. The only thing she's thinking about is finding a way to save her daughter, just as any real mother would do. I know that if it were our Sheridan and I had the ability to conceive another child at my age, I would do it in a heartbeat if it would help save his life."
"I hear what you're saying. And I know how worried you are about Elizabeth's well-being. We all are. But at the end of the day, Hyacinth, you have to remember that this is Elizabeth's decision to make. The only thing we can do is just…be there for her, no matter what happens."
Hyacinth said nothing as she nervously drummed her fingers on the table and got lost in her own thoughts.
A couple of days later, Liz was much more alert and she looked considerably better than she did the day of her miscarriage. Although she still appeared pale, she did have more color in her face now, and she was sitting up in bed talking and interacting with everyone. She was in the middle of a conversation with Michael, Rachel, Onslow, Daisy, and Rose at eleven-thirty that morning when Hyacinth and Richard also arrived at the hospital. They were met in the corridor outside Elizabeth's room by her daughter, brother, and aunt.
"Hello, everyone," Hyacinth said kindly. "How is Liz doing today?"
"Much better, thankfully," Emmet replied.
"She's sitting up and talking," said Maggie. "She really does seem to be a little stronger today."
"I'm very glad to hear it," said Richard.
"I'm glad you're both here. We've been waiting for you. We're about to stage a sort of intervention," Gail announced.
"Intervention?" said Hyacinth.
"You know, Mrs. B. When somebody's struggling with an alcohol or drug addiction, their loved ones can sometimes do what's called an intervention, where they'll all get together, sometimes with a professional counselor, and try to convince them to go to a rehab center or something. Obviously, Mum doesn't have any kind of addiction, but we all know that if she tries to get pregnant again, it could kill her. All of us who love her have no choice but to do an intervention. We've all got to go into Mum's room and make her promise us she'll never attempt anything like this again. We can't allow her to continue playing Russian roulette with her health."
"Gail, I understand how worried you are about your mother," said Richard. "What happened to her the other day scared us all very much. But I'm not sure we have the right to just march into her hospital room and try to force her into making such a personal decision. It's your mother's life, and I think something like this should be her decision, not ours."
Hyacinth shook her head and told her husband, "No, Richard. Gail is right. We cannot just stand idly by and allow Elizabeth to do something that could get her killed. You and I are her friends, Richard. We're more than her friends. We may not be related to her by blood, but Elizabeth is our family. It's our job to look out for her best interests in times like these."
"Hyacinth is right," Emmet chimed in. "And so is Gail. We can't allow Liz to go on playing games with her life like this."
"We certainly can't," Maggie agreed.
"Alright then. We're agreed. We'll go into Elizabeth's room and we'll do this…intervention," Hyacinth announced. "Richard, open the door, please dear."
Although Richard didn't approve, he knew better than to try to go against his wife when she had her mind made up about something, and he quietly, hesitantly opened the door to Elizabeth's room.
"What is this intervention supposed to be about?" Liz inquired several minutes later as Gail, Emmet, Maggie, Hyacinth, Richard, Daisy, Onslow, the vicar, and his wife all stood together around her hospital bed.
"Mum, this last pregnancy nearly killed you. And because we all love you so much, we can't allow something like that to happen again. Like I just said, we all love you, and we all need you. And nobody needs you now more than I do. Mum, we want you to promise all of us that you'll never try anything like this again."
"You mean another pregnancy?" asked Liz.
"Yes," Gail replied.
"It's far too dangerous, Liz," Emmet told her in a kind but solemn tone of voice. "We nearly lost you. You know sis, sometimes I think you underestimate just how important you really are to all of us."
"You certainly underestimate how important you are to me," Hyacinth gently scolded, and then she took Elizabeth's hand in her own. "But then again, I realize it now that that's mostly my fault. As many people have pointed out to me in recent weeks, I haven't said this to you over the years like I should have, Liz. But I'm saying it now. Elizabeth, you are the kindest neighbor and friend that anybody could ever hope to have. And in fact, you are so much more than just a neighbor and a friend. You're my best friend. And if, God forbid, something had happened to you the other day, it would have been like…well…for me…it would have been just like losing one of my very own sisters," she admitted as a couple of silent tears fell from her eyes.
In that moment, Gail took her mother's other hand, looked deeply into her eyes, and told her, "Mum, you're not just Mrs. Bucket's best friend. You're mine too. Ever since Dad left us to go live in Saudi Arabia, it's always been you and me against the world. People always say that parents can't be their children's friends, but that's never been the case with you and me. Oh yeah, sure, there have been times over the years when you had to lay down the law with me and discipline me, just like every parent has to do with their child, but there was never a moment when you weren't there for me. I could always come to you and talk to you about anything. There was never a single detail of my life that was too insignificant to hear about. Every moment of every day, you always made me feel so loved."
Liz responded by releasing Hyacinth's hand and tenderly stroking her daughter's cheek.
"And I can't imagine my life without you," Gail continued. "Mum, if I had to choose to either die young or to stand by and let you give up your life to save mine, I would choose to die young. You have to promise us all that you'll never attempt another pregnancy again. If it's going to hurt you like this, it just isn't worth it."
"Gail, honey, I know this whole thing frightened you, but you really don't have to worry. I'm fine," Liz insisted.
"And we want to keep you that way," said Hyacinth. "Now listen to me. All of you. There are not going to be any more miscarriages." She then locked her eyes with Gail's, took Gail's hand, and pointedly said, "And nobody is going to die young. Nobody. I know there's somebody out there in the world who's a match for this wonderful young lady of ours, and I know it'll be difficult, but one way or another, we will find him. I'll organize more bone marrow donor drives. I'll organize drives right and left. If I have to, I'll have every person in England tested. So Liz, I don't want you to try anything like this again. If you won't agree not to do this again for your own sake and for the sake of your health, then do it for the sake of your priceless daughter who loves you and needs you."
In that moment, Gail held her mother's gaze with her matching blue eyes and said, "Please, Mum."
After several long silent moments, Elizabeth finally said, "Okay, honey. No more pregnancy attempts. I promise."
Nearly everyone in the room sighed a sigh of relief in that instant as Gail gave her mother a very long hug. When their embrace ended, Hyacinth kissed the top of Elizabeth's head.
"I meant what I said, love," Hyacinth told her gently. "From this moment forward, everybody in this room is going to work together and we're going to work our fingers to the bone, and one way or another, we are going to find your Gail the bone marrow donor that she needs. We're a team. All of us." Hyacinth then put her hands on top of Elizabeth's and said, "Get in here, everybody." Gail leaned in a moment later and put her hands on top of Hyacinth's, and everyone else in the room followed suit, and soon, there was a mountain of hands piled one on top of the other. "Team on three, alright? One. Two. Three."
"Team!" everyone said aloud.
Over the next eight weeks, Hyacinth remained true to her word, and she organized countless donor drives for Gail at the church, the park, and various other venues. As she said, Hyacinth really did work her fingers to the bone, and she got everybody else to as well. When Liz was fully recovered from her miscarriage, she worked equally hard, albeit under Hyacinth's watchful and protective eye. Hyacinth frequently scolded Elizabeth whenever she felt that she was working too hard and tiring herself out. Unfortunately, even though hundreds of people were tested, no one was a compatible bone marrow donor for Gail.
When Hyacinth invited Liz over for afternoon tea one day, Liz was able to open up to Hyacinth in ways she never could have in the past. She was still enduring the grief and emotional turmoil of her miscarriage for one thing, and for another, she was quite depressed and discouraged because no one from all their donor drives had been a match, and she simply needed a good shoulder to cry on. In the past, Hyacinth really hadn't cared about anybody except herself and she never would have taken the time to really listen to Liz and be there for her, but now, that was exactly what she did. Hyacinth did still have a streak of arrogance running through her and there was a pretty big part of her inside that still basically believed that she was God's gift to the world, but she really was being a much better friend to Elizabeth now. When she came over that day, Hyacinth actually listened to her and let her have a good cry, and then she tried to encourage her as best she could.
Later on that evening after Hyacinth and Richard had eaten supper, Richard walked into the lounge and saw something he never expected to see: Hyacinth sitting on the settee, reading the Bible.
"Hyacinth, is that the Bible you're reading?" asked a surprised Richard.
"It is."
"Why?"
Hyacinth looked up at her husband then and told him, "If you must know, Richard, I'm looking for answers."
"Answers to what?"
"Everyone knows that Elizabeth has her drawbacks. When it comes to social entertaining, she is hopelessly inept. She could never dream of reaching my standards as a hostess. She is so remarkably clumsy that it's downright painful to watch her at times. But in spite of all that, Elizabeth really is a caring and gentle person. Lord knows she's a wonderful mother. When Liz came over today for tea, she was in so much pain because of the loss of her baby. The word 'pain' isn't even enough to describe it. She was in agony inside. She didn't deserve this, Richard. Elizabeth may have her faults, but she didn't deserve to lose yet another baby like this. That's why I'm searching for answers. I'm hoping God will let me find something, anything, to help me understand why this had to happen."
With a kind nod, Richard said, "I understand, Hyacinth. I think I'll go take a walk for a little while and let you do your searching in private."
"Very well, dear," said Hyacinth, and then Richard bent down and kissed her on the forehead and left.
When Richard returned about an hour later, much to his surprise, he heard Hyacinth sobbing in the lounge. Two months earlier, Gail, Hyacinth, and everybody else had staged an 'intervention' of sorts to try to save Elizabeth's health and life by convincing her to never attempt another pregnancy again. Tonight, God, Himself had staged an intervention of His own to save Hyacinth's very soul, and He did it with one single sentence.
Richard quickly walked into the lounge, sat down on the settee beside his wife, lovingly put his hand on her shoulder, and asked, "Hyacinth, what is it? What's the matter?"
With tears streaming down her cheeks, an utterly devastated Hyacinth looked at Richard and replied, "I found my answers, Richard. I know why Elizabeth lost her baby two months ago."
"What answers did you find?"
"Proverbs eighteen verse twenty-one. It says, 'Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.'"
"I'm sorry, Hyacinth. I don't understand. What does that verse in Proverbs have to do with Elizabeth losing her baby?"
"Richard, it's all my fault. Elizabeth lost her baby because of me."
"I still don't understand. How could you possibly get the idea from that verse that you had anything at all to do with Elizabeth's miscarriage?"
"Think, Richard. Given Elizabeth's age and her history of miscarriages, her baby was already in fragile condition when she came back home after her stay in London. The last thing in the world she needed was for someone to hurt her or upset her in any way. The very last thing on earth she needed was for someone to cause her even more stress than she was already experiencing with her worries about Gail's leukemia. And when she came back and I found out about her pregnancy, what was the very first thing I did? I acted like a childish, pathetic fool. I opened my big mouth and said stupid, ridiculous, hurtful things about Liz that I knew the whole time weren't true, and I caused her a great amount of emotional pain and stress. And just nine days later, Elizabeth lost her baby. It's no coincidence that while I've been sitting here tonight, searching the Scriptures for answers about Elizabeth's miscarriage, I found where it says in Proverbs that death and life are in the power of the tongue. It was me, Richard. Elizabeth's miscarriage wasn't God's fault. It was my fault. Elizabeth's poor, innocent little baby died because of me, Richard. Because of my stupidity and my big mouth. Elizabeth's baby died because of my stupid, insensitive, cruel words. Oh, dear Lord, I don't know if I can take this. What have I done, Richard? What have I done?" Hyacinth asked while leaning over into Richard's arms and breaking down into even more sobs.
"Hyacinth, listen to me," Richard said gently while his wife was crying, even shaking in his arms. "You do have your faults. You can often be a very trying person to live with. But you are not responsible for Elizabeth's miscarriage."
After having a good long cry for about the next ten minutes, Hyacinth finally wiped her eyes with a tissue, sat up straight again, and managed to compose herself. Then she looked Richard in the eye and asked him, "Richard, are you God? Are you a doctor? Are you any kind of medical professional?"
"No."
"Is there really any possible way that you can look at me and tell me with absolute certainty that my wagging my venomous tongue and unfairly accusing Elizabeth of adultery that night had nothing at all to do with her miscarriage? Can you tell me with one hundred percent certainty that the extra stress I caused Liz had absolutely nothing to do with her losing her baby?"
A couple of silent moments passed until finally, Richard told Hyacinth in a sorrowful tone, "No, I can't. I can't tell you that with one hundred percent certainty. However, I honestly don't believe for a moment that what happened to Liz was your fault. You said it yourself. Her baby was in fragile condition. It was a high-risk pregnancy, especially considering Elizabeth's age and all her previous miscarriages. Hyacinth, I really do believe that it would have happened anyway, regardless of anything you said or did."
"But there's no way you can be one hundred percent sure of that, is there?"
"No, there isn't."
"So that means that it is possible that Elizabeth's baby died because of my arrogance and my hurtful words. It is entirely possible that the extra stress I caused Elizabeth by my cruel words that night was the straw that broke the camel's back, in a manner of speaking."
"Hyacinth, there's no way to know what ultimately causes a miscarriage. You can't torment yourself like this."
"You know what's so ironic about this? Even though I was the one who made that terrible accusation against Elizabeth, I never believed for a minute that she was guilty of having an affair with another man. Deep down inside, I knew better than that. I didn't mean it, Richard. I just said it. And I've been sitting here tonight asking myself, 'Hyacinth, why did you say what you did about Elizabeth that night?' And I've realized the truth. The truth is, Richard, you married an unbelievably selfish, shallow, mean-spirited snake. I said what I did about Liz that night because I wanted to talk badly about her so I would look so much better in comparison and feel good about myself. That's it. That's the cold, hard truth. I wasn't thinking about another soul on planet Earth that night other than me. When I first heard that Elizabeth was pregnant, it never once dawned on me to be concerned about her or her baby. It never once crossed my mind that this was a high-risk pregnancy for Liz and that I should be looking out for her and for the innocent little life that she was carrying. No, the only thing I was concerned about that night was my ego. Oh Richard, until tonight, I had no idea what a horrible, ruthless person I could be. And that's not even the worst part."
"What is the worst part?"
"The consequences of it all, not for myself, but for poor Elizabeth and her daughter. Richard, that baby could have been a compatible bone marrow donor for Gail. And if the baby was a match for Gail, and if we cannot find her another match in enough time…" Hyacinth said as she began to sob once again.
"Hyacinth–"
"It'll all be my fault," she continued once she caught her breath. "It'll be not just one but two lives lost, all because I had to be stupid and selfish and open my big mouth. Oh Richard, maybe I did want to make myself feel like I was above Elizabeth, but I had no idea that saying what I did would lead to something like this. I had no idea simple words could cause such pain and destruction. I was so very cruel and wrong to make false accusations against Elizabeth just so I would feel better about myself, but I honestly didn't mean to hurt anyone. Not like this. Oh Richard, what am I supposed to do now? How can I possibly fix this? How can I possibly make this right again?"
Oh Jesus, what am I supposed to tell her? Richard prayed silently within his own thoughts.
Let Me break her, a familiar, instinctive voice from his gut, the still, small voice of the Lord, Himself that had guided him for years, answered. Don't try to talk her out of what she's feeling. Her heart has become very hard over the years because of her pride. The only way she'll ever come to Me is if she's broken. Allowing Me to break her is in fact the only way to save her.
Richard then closed his eyes, took in a deep breath, and let out a long sigh. In the next moment, he looked his wife in the eyes and told her in the kindest way possible, "There are some things in this life, Hyacinth, that you just can't fix, no matter how badly you want to. There are some times when you basically have no choice but to let go and let God. Sometimes we make messes, even big and terrible messes, that we just cannot clean up on our own."
Unable to say another word, Hyacinth simply collapsed into her husband's arms and broke down crying once again.
"After that night last week," Hyacinth said tearfully to the vicar and his wife at the vicarage eight days later, "it all just started hitting me so hard. All these years, I've been so arrogant towards everyone. So cold. When Emmet said to me the night Liz returned that the only person I truly cared about was me, he was telling the truth. Every moment of every day, the only thing I've ever cared about was my social position. Impressing the upper class. Impressing the aristocracy. Trying to convince everyone around me that I was something more than what I really was. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, those were the only thoughts that ever entered my mind. I never felt an ounce of concern for the well-being of the people around me. I only cared about trying to convince myself and others that I was above everybody else. For the majority of my life, that has been my one and only concern. For years, I ended up dragging Elizabeth and my poor husband into my silly, crazy schemes to try and climb the social ladder, and sometimes, it was even funny. Sometimes the craziest things happened and when I look back on it, it actually gives me a good laugh.
"But this time, it's different. Now, it's not funny anymore," Hyacinth said sadly as even more tears streamed down her cheeks. "Even though we cannot know for certain why Elizabeth lost her baby, there is a possibility, a very real possibility, that my cruel, hurtful words are at least partly to blame. It could very well be that the extra stress I caused her because of my big mouth, in conjunction with everything else she and Gail were already going through, resulted in her miscarriage. The Bible is right. Death and life are in the power of the tongue. It wasn't until now, after all these years, that I've finally realized that not just my careless actions, but also my careless words, do have very real consequences – even deadly consequences – for other people besides myself. Because I had to be so childish and selfish, and foolishly open my mouth that night without thinking, I may very well have played a role in the death of an innocent baby – my best friend's baby. I always said that I was a Christian; that mine and Richard's household was a Christian household. But I see it now that I was merely pretending all this time. I really don't know Jesus. Not like I should. I know I need forgiveness but how could Jesus possibly want anything to do with me after what I've done?"
"Hyacinth, do you know why the Gospel is called the good news?" Michael asked her kindly.
"Why?"
"Because anyone, and I do mean anyone, who wants to come to Jesus and accept the gift of salvation that He purchased for humanity on the cross, can. Nobody loves to forgive more than Jesus does. Of that, I can assure you."
"What do I have to do?"
"Believe. Trust in the perfect, finished work of Jesus Christ, His sacrifice on the cross, as payment for your sins. Accept His undeserved gift of salvation."
"It can't be that simple."
The vicar laughed and admitted, "I know where you're coming from. For a long time, I couldn't accept the truth of the gospel either, because I felt it was too simple; too good to be true. But God never made salvation complicated. It's human beings who go in and complicate things. Far too often within the Christian church today, professing Christians make the mistake of combining salvation and discipleship, and as a result, they end up preaching a dangerous false gospel based on our works; based on what we do instead of what Jesus did. However, salvation and discipleship are two entirely different things. Salvation is free, and we can receive it through the grace of God by believing in His only begotten Son. Discipleship, on the other hand, is very costly. Jesus said that those who wanted to be His disciples had to carry their crosses and follow Him. In order to be saved from your sins, from an eternity in hell, all you have to do is trust in what Jesus did for you on the cross. After you've done that, you have a choice to make. You can choose to spend the rest of your life serving Jesus as one of His disciples, out of gratitude for what He's done for you, or you can choose to continue living solely to please yourself. But once you've accepted the free gift of salvation, there are no works you can do to add to it to make it more complete. You don't do good works to prove or maintain your salvation, nor do good works automatically follow salvation. If they did, there wouldn't have been a need for much of the New Testament to be written. Born-again believers wouldn't have needed to be exhorted and encouraged to do good works and live Godly lives if it was automatic; they would have already been doing that on their own. But anyway, the point is, if you choose to do good works in Christ's name, it must always be out of gratitude, never to try to earn or hold onto your salvation. You don't need to worry about holding onto your salvation. Jesus took care of that. Every other false religion in the world involves some sort of system where people try to do enough good works to outweigh the bad and therefore earn themselves a place in heaven. What makes true Christianity different is that it acknowledges that people cannot ever do enough good works to make themselves good enough to satisfy God's standards of perfection. True Christianity acknowledges that Jesus Christ went to the cross to do for us what we couldn't do for ourselves. Do you understand, Hyacinth?"
After a short contemplative silence, Hyacinth replied, "I think I do. I just know that I really need two things right now. I need God to forgive me for what I've done to Elizabeth and for what I've put other people through all this time, and I need God to help me change. If my foolish ways could do something so damaging as to contribute to my best friend losing her baby, what else could happen? All these years, I never really believed I was hurting anybody, but now I see the truth. Behaving the way I've behaved through the years really does have consequences, even deadly consequences. I cannot allow this to go on."
In that moment, the vicar made eye contact with Hyacinth and asked her, "Hyacinth, do you trust in Jesus Christ to forgive you for every sin you've ever committed and every sin you ever will commit for the rest of your life? Do you accept the free gift of salvation that He sacrificed Himself on that cross to give to you so that He could pay the full penalty of your sins in the eyes of a just and holy God?"
"Yes," Hyacinth gasped as more tears fell from her eyes, and then the vicar and his wife looked at each other and gave one another a knowing smile. In the following moments, Hyacinth Bucket began to experience a kind of peace she never could have imagined before. Hyacinth just broke down and had a good cry, and Michael and Rachel simply sat with her and let her cry for as long as she needed to.
"Hyacinth, I want you to understand that you have just said yes to the most precious gift a human being could ever possibly hope to receive," said Michael a little while later. "You just said yes to eternal life."
"And He really has forgiven me for everything I've done – including what I did to Elizabeth and her baby?"
"Yes. Though your sins have been like scarlet, now, in the eyes of the Almighty God, they are as white as snow. Because you have accepted the perfect sacrifice of Jesus Christ on your behalf as payment for your sins, your sins are no more. In God's eyes, it's as if you've never sinned."
"I'm so grateful for that, but even though I'm clean in God's eyes now, it doesn't change the fact that Elizabeth is still suffering because of me. How can I possibly make that right? How can I undo the damage of what I've caused?"
"You can't. Not completely. But thankfully, God can. God works everything, even our worst sins and our biggest mistakes, together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose."
"I'd like to chime in here for a minute," said Rachel.
"Of course, darling," said Michael.
"Hyacinth, I just want to say that I personally do not believe that God was necessarily trying to tell you that you were to blame for Elizabeth's miscarriage. Liz already has a history of miscarriages, and I don't think it's very likely that anything you said or did would have made that much difference. I've been a homemaker ever since Michael and I got married, but before that, I worked as an OB nurse and a midwife, and I've seen women go through miscarriages. When a mother loses her baby, so often, she'll blame herself and cause herself so much needless pain when in fact, there's really nothing she could have done about it. I know I can't speak for God, but just in my own opinion, I believe that God was simply trying to warn you about the grave power that words can carry. I know from experience that words actually can kill. When my sister and I were teenagers, she had a verbally and emotionally abusive boyfriend. Every single day, he said the cruelest things to her and cut her down and destroyed her spirit. Eventually, she became so depressed that she actually committed suicide. He basically killed her with his words. But in your case with Elizabeth, I think it's different. Yes, what you did was very petty and hurtful, but I doubt it caused Liz so much stress that it made her lose her baby. If I may be very blunt with you, Hyacinth, it's been kind of an unwritten rule around here for a long time now to never take you too seriously, and nobody understood that better than Liz. I know Liz was hurt by the things you said, but to be painfully honest, I don't believe she was surprised. And I don't think she allowed it to bother her too much. I don't mean this harshly, but I feel I really must tell you the truth, here. And the truth is, we've all had to learn through the years to simply allow your behavior to roll off our backs and to not let it get to us. In my own opinion, I believe that God was simply trying to make you aware that your words and your behavior can have a negative impact on other people. I believe He was simply trying to get your attention and make you think, really think, about the way you treat others. If a person goes on acting selfishly and spewing out cruel words to other people, it really can lead to death sometimes, and I think God simply wanted to bring that fact to your attention. Again, just in my own opinion, I don't think that God was trying to blame Elizabeth's miscarriage on you. I think He was simply trying to make you aware of the fact that backstabbing others with your words does have the potential to cause death."
"That's an excellent point, Rachel," Michael told his wife. "And I agree."
"Hyacinth, may I ask you a personal question?" asked Rachel.
"Of course."
"Why has it always been so important to you to be accepted by the aristocracy and the upper class? Why has it always been so important to you to convince other people that you're above them?"
"I don't know," Hyacinth replied with a weary sigh. "When I was young, I was always the object of ridicule. I was that lower-class girl from that poor neighborhood living in an embarrassingly dilapidated house. And as if that wasn't bad enough, my father–" Hyacinth began to say, but then she immediately stopped herself.
Sensing what Hyacinth was about to say, Rachel knowingly inquired, "Your father abused you when you were a child, didn't he?"
After a long silence, Hyacinth finally replied, "That's not something I will ever discuss."
Michael and Rachel looked at one another for a brief moment and Michael gave his wife an understanding nod.
"What I will say," Hyacinth continued, "is that between the other kids at school making fun of me and all the unspeakable things my father did to me, I went through the first twenty years of my life feeling like used toilet tissue. Every day as I was growing up, I swore to myself that there would come a time when I would really stand out, not because I was poor, lower-class, or abused, but because I was something really special."
"Hyacinth, you were always something really special," Rachel said kindly. "Not because of how much money you and your husband have. Not because of your Royal Doulton with the hand-painted periwinkles or your white slimline telephone. Not because of your candlelight suppers or your efforts to be the perfect hostess or what other people think of your social status. You are now and you always have been something really special because the Almighty God created you. You are a unique creation of the Lord God, Himself. There is only one Hyacinth Bucket on this entire planet. There is not another soul in the entire human population like you. And if you want to truly become a great person, a person worthy of respect and admiration, you have to do the very opposite of what you have been doing for most of your life.
"Think about it. No one is more respected than Jesus Christ, and look at the example He set for humanity. He never once cared about how much money people had or didn't have. As a matter of fact, Jesus spent most of His time with the very people you've always looked down upon. He spent time with society's outcasts and rejects. He spent time with and loved the lepers and the poor and the sick and the demon-possessed and the tax collectors and the prostitutes. The religious leaders of His time, the Pharisees, people who were often looked up to in the community, actually dared to criticize the Lord because He spent time with 'sinners.' The Lord Jesus Christ, God in the flesh, actually washed His disciples' feet. Think about that, Hyacinth. The Almighty God Himself, the King of kings and the Lord of lords, washed His disciples' feet. You can't get any more upper-class or royal than Jesus Christ, the ultimate King, and yet when He was on the earth, He lived His life as a servant. He lived to serve and care for others. He even went so far as to endure the cruelest, most humiliating form of death imaginable, to save us all from our sins. Jesus is love, itself. And it's not wealth or having a title or being a member of the aristocracy that makes a person great and worthy of respect in the sight of God. It's living as Jesus lived. It's humbling yourself and spending your life serving others and caring for others and putting others' needs above your own. That is the true meaning of greatness."
Hyacinth remained lost in thought for several long moments, and then eventually she looked at the vicar and his wife and told them quietly, "Thank you. Thank you both. You've given me an awful lot to think about."
Hyacinth, Michael, and Rachel talked for about ten more minutes, and then after exchanging the usual pleasantries, they said goodbye and Hyacinth took a cab home. During the short ride back to her house, Hyacinth remained in very deep thought over everything that had just happened at the vicarage. She knew she would have to stop and just take everything in and really digest it all. Hyacinth wasn't sure what was going to happen next, but she was sure of one thing: something was different inside her. Something was very, very different.
