Everyone was inside the cabin when the two of you returned. Taking a deep breath, you stepped in front of Dean and reached for the handle, pushing in the thin wooden door. Meg was in the same exact position she'd been in when you stormed off. Unbidden, her words from your first meeting trickled into from memory.
"Oh I know who she is."
It made your skin crawl to think that demons had watched your life, much as they had Sams. You pointedly ignored her as you stepped into the room. Sam leaped from the table.
"Are you okay?" he looked so panicked and concerned that you were sure Castiel had not filled him in on anything about your conversation. He looked genuinely concerned and interested. You really wanted to give him the respect of explaining this in a meaningful way. Smiling, you rubbed his forearm reassuringly.
"I'm fine Sam. I can explain everything but first I need to talk to…'' With a flutter the angel appeared a few feet behind Sam, looking more somber and serious than you'd seen him in years. His eyes carried concern and sorrow as he watched you interact with your brother. Squeezing his arm one last time, you moved past Sam and went to stand a few inches from Castiel.
"Can we…" and before you knew it, the two of you were standing in the most beautiful garden you'd ever seen. It appeared to be just after sunset.. Wherever you were. There were piles and waves of flowers in every color and shade imaginable. From blood red roses to small sparkling stephanotis, the smell of life wafted over every part of your body making your skin tingle. Feet away a massive old oak tree towered over the two of you, shading you and blocking the gentle breeze. Just near the foot of the tree was an old wooden bench.
Breathing deeply, eyes shut, you walked to the bench, listening as the angel followed. Seating yourself on the left, Castiel sat on the right side of the bench, facing you, waiting. Part of you wanted to reach out and clasp his hands in the same comforting way that he'd always done with you. But a small petty part stopped you and kept your eyes on the ground.
"Cas… I…" you began.
"I'm sorry," his voice was so soft and heartbreakingly sad that you looked up. It caught you off guard when tears rimmed the edges of those blue eyes. You smiled sadly, the corners of your mouth dipping. Tilting your head to one side, the spiteful side disappeared and you reached for his hands. Closing both of yours over one large, warm hand, you traced your finger over his coarse knuckles, reflecting on the fact that the angel in this vessel was so much older.
"I know Cas," for some reason the nickname seemed natural now, "It just hurt that you… lied," that last word that you delivered felt like such an indictment that you whispered it.
"To quote humanity, 'The road to hell is often paved with good intentions," he grinned apologetically. You smiled.
"I don't know where we go now," you whispered. Then long fingers were gently grazing your cheek, pulling your eyes back up to his. He looked sad but hopeful. For a long moment, it seemed like there were so many things he was going to say. His eyes traveled around your face, trying to pick a point to start. In the end he sighed.
"I'd like to earn your trust back, if you will allow me," he said evenly.
"I'd like that."
You returned to the cabin not long after, not wanting the others to worry. Castiel dropped your hand which he had taken during flight and quietly returned to his Uno game. Dean smiled at you from over his beer, some crappy kung fu movie on. Sam was seated next to him, trying to look casual but the interest in his eyes betrayed him.
You seated yourself in the gap between the two of them, an oddly intimate gesture you would've never thought of before. Sam seemed surprised but tried to play it calm. The shift of his body to avoid touching was comical though.
"Sam relax… we're family," you quipped. Then began a long conversation, pulling Castiel at various points during the conversation. During this odd little family meeting, you learned a little more about your own history. Turns out your aunt had been a hunter trying to get out. John had come to the rescue when things had gone south in a final job. One things had led to another and then John left three days later.
It was months before Gail had realized she was pregnant. By then, who knows where John was. Beside, according to Cas, their relationship had never been anything more than physical for either of them. So John never knew that he had a daughter. Gail had given you her last name, to play into the cover story and to protect.
It had been a small blow to learn that your dad never knew that you existed. As much as you tried to hide the feeling of loss, it must have flashed across your face. Cas, who was sitting cross legged on the floor, working on his Uno spread, reached a hand over, squeezing your thigh firmly.
"He would have been very proud of you," he said, looking you straight in the eye. Butterflies beat against your torso.
The clock chimed two o'clock in the morning. Sam's head was thrown back over the edge of the couch, his mouth open sleeping deeply. Dean, legs propped on the table and arms crossed, was dozing with his chin on his chest. You had scooted to the floor, feeling too warm between your giant brothers. Head resting on Sam's knee, you fell into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.
Castiel continued to play his game, mind wandering in so many different directions. It was only Meg who saw his wing, glossy and black, slowly curl around you as you slept.
