I don't own NCIS Los Angeles! My native language is Dutch and I'm dyslectic so sorry for any mistakes. Thank you for all the reviews, alerts and favorites!

Chapter 6

I smile, you smile

I sat on the couch, alone in our apartment. Marty had left me for the day. He had to spend his day with Hope. So I was home alone…well Monty was next to me, Marty's old was staring at me. We both didn't know what to think of each other. Monty had stayed out of my way on the day Sam had brought the dog over. Marty was so happy to see the animal. I knew he had missed Monty.

As the days passed, I started to understand why Marty loved that dog so much. That dog could steal everyone's heart by just staring at the person. Like he was doing now…I clapped my hands and Monty came walking towards me, wagging his tail. I stroked the dog's head and I saw him enjoy it. A dog had a simple life. It needed food and water and sometimes some love. And it would give you so much love back if you gave it just a little bit.

But having Monty in the apartment with me, didn't replace the emptiness, the loneliness. I missed New York. I missed my old friends. I missed my old life. A few days back I looked on my Facebook account. It was strange to see how people kept sending you messages after four years. How they reacted to your disappearance. How they reacted to your suspected death. People who promised to keep me in their prayers. It were people I hardly knew. Who I had met once when I was just a student. Who I had never spoken to again. It was the weirdest feeling to be back on Facebook.

I didn't know for who I did it. I didn't need to do it for anyone. The important people already knew. There weren't much important people in my life. It stopped with Beth. My parents died a long time ago and I had no other siblings.

But for some reason, unknown to me, I updated my Facebook account. Maybe because I wanted to know how they would react if they knew I was alive. Whether I would become a nobody again now that I was back.


I had never seen Marty so happy, seen him smile so much. I just fell a bit more in love with him. Just because of his beautiful smile. He kissed me and he sat down next to me. He smelled like nature…grass and trees. It was a good smell on him and I snuggled against him.

'How was your day?' I asked him. 'How was Hope?' I deliberately left out Kensi. I knew he had spent the day with her, but I didn't need to know how she was doing. I agreed to have Hope in our lives. Not Kensi.

'It was amazing,' Marty told me enthusiastically. 'We went to the park…and when we were walking, she grabbed my hand. It was such a special feeling, her tiny hand in mine. She actually grabbed my hand.' Marty looked at his hand like Hope was still holding it. 'And then, at the playground, she played with me. I had to push her on the swings, to take her to the slide. She wanted to play with me… for the first time I played with my daughter.'

'Sounds wonderful,' I smiled.

'Next time, you should come with us,' Marty said. 'You need to get to know her. She's such a special girl…well I guess every dad says that about his child…but Hope is really a special girl.' I listened at him talking so proudly about all the things Hope did. He thought she was so special, that she was like no other kid. I had to agree with him on that. There weren't much other children who were born in captivity, never seeing the sun.

But if that made her special to Marty, that was okay. Only I couldn't help feeling abandoned. I was spending my time alone in the apartment while Marty was enjoying his time with his daughter. She would become a part of our life…but now she was a part of his…not mine. I understood that Marty wanted to get to know her alone first …but I felt hurt. It was like he wanted to be with her more than with me. If I was honest, I was jealous at a three-year-old who was spending time with her dad for the first time. And because I felt jealous, I felt horrible. Why couldn't I give Hope a chance to get to know her dad? Why couldn't I give Marty this chance? He was so happy talking about Hope. It was like she was the light for Marty. Like he had been for me in our dark prison. He had been my little light.


'I did it, girl!' Stephanie told me enthusiastically over the phone. 'I managed to get you a job at the firm! First they were like 'We're not hiring anyone right now.' But I told them that you needed the job and that I remembered one of the Johnson's needed a new assistant because the old one would leave. So I kind of went on my knees, begging to give you a job…and if you have ever seen me beg, you know it always works out.' I couldn't help smiling hearing my friend talk about how she got me a job. 'But if you visit us tomorrow, so that they can see who is getting the job, it will be yours.'

'That is unbelievable, Steph. Thank you so much. I'm going to take you out for dinner to thank you…I'll pay for it with my first salary so you'll have to wait some time for it.' Stephanie started to laugh.

'No problem. Happy to help you…oh, I got to go. Aaron is coming over and I need to get ready. We're going to have a fun night.'

'Well, have fun on your fun night and I guess I'll see you tomorrow.' Stephanie hung up and I took a few slow breaths. I had a job. I had taken another step into our new life. No more wasting time inside. I walked back to Marty, who was sitting on the couch, watching what seemed to be the news. I sat down next to him.

'Stephanie got me a job at the law firm,' I told him and he smiled.

'That is great news!' he said and he kissed me. 'Though I will miss having you around all the time.' He pulled me onto his lap and I laughed. I leaned down to kiss him.


This night I was woken up by soft crying. I looked next to me but it was empty. Marty was no longer in our bed. I grabbed a sweater on my way out of the bed and I walked on the balcony. Marty was standing there, crying. I stepped closer, next to him, and I kissed him on his cheek. He turned to me, his eyes all red and puffy from the crying.

'Did I wake you?' he asked.

'I don't care,' I answered. 'I'm here for you. What is wrong?' Before Marty could tell me, he started to sob and I wrapped my arms around him, holding him close. He felt cold. He had been standing outside for some time now. How couldn't he be cold? I was even cold and I was here not even for a minute.

'It's not fair,' he cried and I rubbed circles over his back. 'My little girl was amazed when she was in the park…three years old and she has never been to a park before…she missed so much…all those things that are normal for us…she missed it all.'

'She will get all those things,' I told him. 'She's got you, Marty…you will give her all those things, I'm sure of it.'

'I don't know how to do it,' he admitted. 'She was scared of every sound in the park, Lisa. She was constantly looking around, like a deer; ready to run when needed. Do you know how hard it is to see your own child so scared?' No, I didn't know. I didn't have a child who was so scared. I didn't have a child. How could I possibly know how it felt? It was one of the few feelings that Marty and I didn't share. We shared the pain, the fear, even the luck from those four years together, but not the hurt of Hope being scared.

'She'll be traumatized for the rest of her life,' Marty sobbed. 'All she knows is that prison where her mother was held and beaten. She doesn't know the happy and fun things in life. You should have seen her when she saw the other kids at the playground. She looked at them like they were aliens. My girl had never seen others of her age…' I placed both hands on his cheeks, forcing him to look at me.

'Marty, then you should be those happy and fun things in life,' I told him. 'Be her light in the dark days, like you have been mine. You can learn her to love life out their prison. Give her what you have given me: love. Love can heal almost anything. And don't forget; you're not alone. You have me.' Marty rested his forehead against mine.

'What would I have done if I didn't have you?' he asked me and he kissed me. You would have died, I thought. We had each other to stay alive in our prison. Without the other, we would have been dead. There wouldn't have been a reason to live any longer. We were each other's saviors.


Nervously I pulled on my skirt. It was the first time in a long time that I was wearing a skirt. Never needed to wear one before. But for this interview, I had to wear one. I had to make a good impression on those people of Johnson and Sons. I hope they didn't mind my tired look. I had tried to conceal it with make-up, but it wasn't working much. Arms were wrapped around me from behind and kisses were placed in my neck.

'You look beautiful,' Marty whispered in my ear. 'And I love you.' I turned around in his arms and smiled. His chest was bare and he had just gotten out of bed, smelling 100% like himself, the smell I loved the most. I loved that he had gotten out bed early, just to say what he said to me. I kissed him on his lips.

'You look gorgeous,' I smiled.

'You will make a perfect first impression on those people,' Marty said. 'Otherwise they are blind and stupid and you should be glad that you won't work for them.'

'Thank you,' I said and I gave him another kiss. 'I have to go now; don't want to be late for my interview.' I managed to pull me away from Marty.

'Good luck!' he told me. 'Not that you need it, gorgeous.' I stroked his check and hurried out of the house. Stephanie was already waiting for me and I got in the car.

'Wow, girl,' she greeted while I hugged her. 'You have had some transformation. You already look like an assistant.' I took a deep breath.

'Yeah, but tell me how I'm going to explain the four year gap,' I replied.

'Think of something, non-criminal, and they will believe it,' Stephanie said. 'It will be fine…I'm pretty sure they will hire you after my begging.'


'Good morning, Miss Parrello, good that you could meet us at such a short notice,' William Johnson, the owner of Johnson and Sons, said and he shook my hand. I smiled polity.

'Of course, Mister Johnson,' I replied. 'It was no problem.'

'Well, Miss Murray already told us something about you,' mister Johnson said. 'You were a journalist, if I'm correct.'

'Yes I was,' I answered. 'For a magazine in New York: Ewoods.'

'I have heard from it,' Mister Johnson said. 'As well as the story that one of their journalists was kidnapped and killed…' I looked shocked at the man. '…but perhaps that was only partly true because I'm guessing that she is sitting in front of me right now.' I looked down and took a deep breath. 'Don't worry, Miss Parrello, I don't care about what happened. I just want to know who I have working for me.'

'Yes, that journalist was me,' I told him.

'And that would be why there is a four year cap on your CV?' Mister Johnson asked and I nodded slowly. 'Alright, then that is clear too. I think there is no reason not to hire you, Miss Parrello.' I looked pleasantly surprised at him and Mister Johnson smiled. 'I'll introduce you to my son Paul, who you will be working for.' I couldn't say anything. Not even a thank you. I followed Mister Johnson to the office of his son. I shook Paul Johnson's hand, managing to say my name and nothing else. I was just dumbfounded.

'She spoke more when we were talking in my office,' Mister Johnson told his son, who smiled at me.


'That is amazing!' Stephanie squealed over the phone and I could swear that I was hearing her jumping up and down. 'So are you going to celebrate?'

'I think so…have to see how Marty is feeling.'

'Oh, he will be happy too. Has to be…after the amazing stories I heard about him. He must be the perfect guy every girl dreams of…and you have him. You better hold him tight.' I laughed and I said my goodbye to her as I heard Marty walking into the apartment. He had been out to do some groceries according to the note on the table. He had written me a note even though he couldn't be sure I was home before him. That was just so sweet. Stephanie was right: he must be that perfect guy that every girl dreams about.

'Tell me you got the job,' he said when he saw me sitting on the couch. I knew that he already knew I did. My big smile had betrayed me. I nodded and he came over to hug me. 'Congratulations! Then it's a good thing I bought this.' He grabbed one of the bags and pulled a bottle of champagne out of it.

'What if I hadn't gotten the job?' I asked him laughing.

'I didn't think that was a possibility,' he said as he filled two cups with champagne. We didn't have champagne glasses, but who cared about that right now, with such an amazing guy. 'And then we could have drunk the champagne to comfort ourselves.' He sat down next to me and kissed me. 'Too you, gorgeous, and your new job.' I didn't mind drinking to that and we took a sip of our champagne.

TBC.