Author's note:

I'm So Sorry (see what what I did there) that I haven't updated in a while. But I have a really good excuse. Well, I guess there aren't any good excuses, but if there were, this would be one. I was at an Imagine Dragons concert. Here in Chicago. Excuse me while I fangirl.

"The path to heaven runs through miles of clouded hell."

Chapter 7: Tobias

I don't understand why was alright with letting Tris come with us for the summer.

Sure, she must know better than anyone how much Tris loves Imagine Dragons, but it must be difficult to send Tris away for so long. That, is selflessness at its finest.

We helped Tris get settled in for the night on our tour bus, and she lies in the bunk just above mine, typing something onto her iPhone, occasionally letting out a small chuckle.

She looks nothing like the Tris I saw earlier today, at the top of the Sears Tower, or in Millennium Park, sturdy, with adrenaline coursing throughout her, making her look… unstoppable. But now, laying in bed wearing nothing but one of Dan's over sized tee shirts, the soft bed sheets cradling her small frame, and the dark circles underneath her eyes from a great lack of sleep, she looks vulnerable, and, I don't know, weak. But that doesn't convince me for one second that is actually is any of those things.

We all have sides of us that are weaker than what we want the world to see. Even the strongest, or the bravest man, has a side of himself that is vulnerable. And I feel special, to get to see this side of her, so early in our relationship. Maybe someday soon, I'll feel good enough to let her see that side of me.

Upon deciding I should give Tris a little time to rest, I head down one of the bus's hallways to find my brother. Wayne, Ben, and Platz are already asleep. Touring the country will take a lot out a person. I've seen it countless times.

I walk slowly toward Dan's bedroom, making my footsteps seem as light as possible. In between steps, I hear the wood creak from behind me. I furrow my eyebrows.

An angelic voice from behind me starts to sing. "Hey- yeah! Don't let em' know we're coming, tip toe higher!"

I remain stopped, back facing her, but a slow grin manages to make its way across my lips. "Singing isn't a very good eavesdropping strategy, Tris."

The tone of her voice changes slightly. "I wasn't eavesdropping."

I turn to face her. "Really?"

A sly smile forms on her plump lips. "You just looked like you were trying to be all stealthy and everything, and I wasn't going to say anything, but you started to tip-toe and-" She breaks out into hysterical laughter. "I just-" she sputters in between obnoxious laughs. "You know, like the song."

I roll my eyes playfully, still grinning. "Yes, I know the song."

She keeps laughing. She reminds me a little of when Dan is tired and jet lagged. He did an interview once when he was, and it went a little like how Tris and I's conversation is going now.

She bends over at the waste, clutching her stomach as her loud laughter transitions into silent chuckles.

I let out a small laugh. "What happened to you?" I raise my eyebrows.

"I don't know," She says, gasping. "I'm just so happy to be here, and that guy, he gave me some disgusting bread, and now everything," A fit of laughter overtakes her again.

I step toward her, and ruffle up her shaggy, chin-length, blonde, locks with a smile as big as Tris's on my face. An expression that is foreign to me.

"Go to sleep, Tris." I murmur, sliding my hand from into her hair, to cradle her cheek.

Her wide eyes stare deep into mine. I would kiss her, but I know she's not in her right mind right now. Perhaps all of the excitement and adrenaline have caused her to become loopy. Or maybe it was the bread.

She stumbles back down the hallway, toward the bunk she will occupy for the rest of the summer. I'm really glad this bus had an extra.

I continue to walk to Dan's room, tiptoeing, so I don't wake anyone. I hope Tris's laughter didn't. I smile to myself a little.

"No, Aja!" Dan's voice beams through his bedroom door. "You're not always the bad guy!" He pauses for a moment. "I will make time! I'll be there for her!"

I press my ear against the door in hopes of hearing Aja on the other end of the phone line. I am able to make out a few things like, you-can't-career- never here—depression-Dan-help-no time- Arrow.

Arrow.

Oh. I think to myself. Dan must be talking to Aja about not being there for Arrow. With Imagine Dragons' major success, Dan and I hardly ever go home, and he never gets to spend time with his wife, or his daughter, Arrow.

Within every blessing, lies a curse. And this is his.

"Can we talk about this later?" Dan's voice cracks. "I still need to tell Tobias."

Shock floods throughout me at the mention of my name. What could this possibly have to do with me?

Another pause. "I love you too."

The door to Dan's bedroom swings open, and we lock eyes.

"Tobias." He says, stress and exhaustion filling his voice.

"Dan." I respond.

He scratches the back of his neck, a nervous habit he and I both happen to posses, and says, "So I guess you heard…"

"Yeah," I cut him off. "Tell me what?"

"Your mother," Dan starts.

"What about my mother?" I raise my voice.

"Shhh." Dan presses a finger to his lips. He looks around, to make sure no one else is listening. "She's trying to contact you."

My body becomes numb. The numbness starts in my fingertips, and works its way over me. That's impossible.

"She's dead." I say.

For a moment, I think I see pity in Dan's eyes. "No. Apparently not."

My ears burn. I turn away, too quickly, from Dan, and head in the opposite direction, fuming.

Thousands of things I could call her race through my head. I curl my hands into fists, and my fingernails dig into the flesh of my palm.

I grit my teeth, and pace back and forth at a lightning speed, anger coursing throughout my body. She hurt me. It is such an understatement, but it is all I can manage to think.

She hurt me, when I was at my most vulnerable state, when I needed her the most, and she left me, motherless, and with… him. She left me with him. Because it was too much for her to handle. My fingernails cause my palms to bleed, and my teeth are pressed up against each other so hard they squeak.

Without thinking, I lash out. My body swings around, and I punch the thing that is closest to me, which happens to be a drum, with all of my power. All the power that I have had to learn to acquire, because of what she did. Because of what he did. They have caused me to become a closed, emotionless man, with a monstrous thing living inside him.

I'm only a man with a chamber thats got me. I'm taking a stand to escape what's inside me.

As my fist collides with the face of the drum, something breaks.