Author's Note: Thanks for your reviews! This chapter would fit in chapter 25 of Apologize, the evening after Kate's nightmare that caused her to stay home from work.. This one is for CwardPm1 who suggested it; I hope it lives up to expectations!
Chapter 7- A Tale of Two Doctors
That evening once they were alone and settled on the couch for their nightly routine of television watching and unwinding with a glass of wine, Johanna decided to be brave. Or at least she was hopeful that being somewhat brave in her choice of conversation would work out okay; her daughter had been chatty; obviously not wanting silence for long as she tried to forget whatever had scared her so badly in her nightmare the night before. She took a breath and decided to wade into the chosen waters that her mind had settled upon.
"So; you dated a doctor," Johanna stated lightly.
Kate glanced at her and nodded. "Yeah, I did."
"A heart surgeon, I believe you mentioned."
"That's right," she replied; unsure if she really wanted to go down this road but she figured it was better than dwelling on the nightmare from the night before.
"What was his name?"
"Josh…Josh Davidson."
Johanna took a sip of wine and nudged the conversation along a little further. "Where did you find him?"
Kate's gaze flicked to her mother's face. "In a bar."
"Uh huh…I'm starting to see why he wasn't introduced as my son-in-law. Relationships that begin in barrooms rarely ever last."
"As much as I hate to admit it, you're probably right about that."
Johanna smiled. "Katherine Davidson would've been too stuffy of a name anyway."
The corner of her mouth tipped upwards in a small smile. "To be completely honest; I never even considered that name change as a possibility."
"Oh? Why not?"
Kate swirled the wine in her glass and frowned. "I didn't love him…I tried to; I told myself that I wanted to love him…but it just wasn't there."
Her mother nodded. "I see. Did he love you?"
She took a long sip of her wine. "He said he did."
"You didn't believe him?"
"No…I think he believed he did; I think he liked the idea of it…but I don't think he really did."
Johanna met her gaze. "I have the feeling this relationship was doomed from the start."
"It was," Kate agreed; "But I think that's what I liked about it in the beginning."
Curiosity flicked across her mother's face. "Why?"
She shrugged. "Easier to keep one foot out the door that way. I guess I just wasn't ready for anything really serious…I didn't want to be tied down and disposable relationships seemed like a nice thing for a long time."
Her mother smiled and reached over to pat her knee. "See, you are like your daddy; just like I always said."
She gave a soft, short laugh. "I guess his gene pool had to sneak in somewhere."
"Apparently so," Johanna quipped. "So what was it that made it easy to keep one foot out the door with your doctor?"
Kate rolled her eyes. "He travels a lot."
"A traveling doctor?"
"Yeah; he does a lot of work with Doctors Without Borders. He's always off somewhere…and at first I liked that, because I don't like to be smothered by someone."
"But then you didn't like it so much?"
"Yeah…it kind of got annoying; it was like that was the only thing that mattered to him; when he'd be taking off next and when he'd come back it was all about all the things he did, all of this 'I save the world' bravado in some ways; and I know that sounds terrible to say because he is making a difference…"
"But it came off as bragging?" Johanna supplied.
"Yeah," Kate sighed. "I sound terrible, don't I?"
"No; I've felt that way about people before; they talk so much about themselves, build themselves and their accomplishments up so much that it doesn't leave much room for others; not to mention making other people feel inferior."
"That's the truth," she muttered. "Don't get me wrong; he's a great doctor…it's just a little too much. Looking back it's like I plucked him off some soapy doctor show like Grey's Anatomy."
Johanna laughed. "Did he have a nickname like McDreamy?"
Kate chuckled. "Castle always called him Doctor Motorcycle Boy."
"Motorcycle?"
"Yeah; he rides a motorcycle."
"Oh for God's sake, Katie; not another guy on a motorcycle," her mother declared with a disgusted sigh.
Kate eyed her. "He's only the second guy I've dated that had a motorcycle."
"The first one was more than enough," Johanna remarked. "What was his name…Tyler? Or has your father called him, Big Bad Baby Face…18 and still in the 10th grade."
"He wasn't that bad," Kate replied.
"He was an ass."
"I was 16," her daughter defended; "I thought he was cool."
Johanna rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah, he was real cool with his motorcycle and cigarette."
"Don't forget his band," Kate replied; "He was in a band too."
"Oh yes; let's not forget that…the little jerk."
"Mother!"
"Well he was! I didn't think you were ever going to come to your senses about that one. You don't know the misery that experience of your life was for me."
"How was it a miserable experience for you?" Kate asked in disbelief.
"Because I had lay in bed every night listening to your father think up new ways to kill him…his favorite was getting out the shot gun and blowing him off his little bike; and after he'd fantasize about that; he'd discuss the different convent schools he had brochures for that he'd like to send you to. On really bad nights, I had to listen to the griping, the complaining, the instance that I make you stop seeing that little jackass. It was seven months of misery, Katie; believe me."
"Why didn't you try to stop me?" she inquired.
"Because I wasn't a fool," Johanna replied. "I knew if I tried to make you stop seeing him that it would just make him all that more appealing to you…and your father was accomplishing enough of that on his own, despite my advice to him. I had to act like I didn't mind too much; and believe me, I did mind a lot; but I knew better…if I had even for a second forbidden you to see him, you would've just snuck around to do it and if you had to date him, I'd rather you do it in full view of the world."
She nodded. "You always were one step ahead of me."
"Yeah; well, I was a former teenage girl myself, you know?"
"I saw Tyler several years ago when I first started on the force."
"Did you arrest him?" Johanna asked hopefully.
"No; I arrested his girlfriend…she shot him."
"Fatally!?"
"No; in the hand…she said she was aiming for…elsewhere…but he blocked himself at the last second and she got his hand instead."
Johanna laughed. "Let me guess, she caught him cheating."
"You got it."
"Did you tell your father? Because he would've loved that."
"No; I didn't tell him."
"You should; it would make his day."
Kate laughed. "Maybe I'll save it for a day when he needs cheering up."
"Good idea; now, getting back to the doctor on the motorcycle…and for the love of God, Katie; if it's a man in a bar who rides a motorcycle; just walk away, it's not the one for you."
She couldn't help but giggle. "I'll keep that in mind."
"You do that," Johanna said before taking a sip of wine. "Now, the good doctor was always jetting off and it got annoying…anything else?"
Kate squirmed a little. "He didn't like Castle; didn't like me working with him."
"Did he give a reason for that?"
"If I recall correctly; he said that I shouldn't be saddled with a clownish writer because all he was going to accomplish was making me infamous with his books and most likely getting me killed with his lack of experience in my field. He said I should get rid of him; I'd never get anywhere that I should in the department with Castle hanging on to my coattails."
Johanna's brow rose. "And what did you say to that?"
"I told him that he could go hop another plane straight to hell because he didn't know anything about Castle or our partnership."
"Is that how the relationship ended?"
"No; he stuck around after that…we just tried not to discuss Castle. When we did it always ended up in an argument."
"I can see why," she replied. "And you were already annoyed with him anyway; with his frequent travels?"
"Yeah; he was never there when I needed someone; he was always in Africa or South America…everyone else was always more important than me. I didn't feel like he was supportive of my career…sometimes he'd make comments about how I could be doing more for the world."
"How does he figure?" Johanna interrupted. "You're out there removing as much danger from the world as you can."
"I guess he didn't see it that way."
"Then he never understood you at all…and clearly had no desire to."
"My thoughts exactly," Kate replied. "I don't think he was interested in a real partnership type of relationship…you know, like you and Dad; the two of you, you were and are always in everything together; and I think Josh was of the notion that he would be the dominant party and what he wanted came first and his beliefs mattered more and so on. We argued once about him going away some much and he came back…for a whole three days and then he picked up and went back. I guess he thought that would assuage any ill will toward it that I had. I don't know…I guess he didn't get me and I didn't get him."
"How long did it last?"
Kate blew out a breath. "I think it was a little short of a year…I don't know; maybe about ten months?"
"Sounds like a long ten months or so."
"Yeah; it felt longer than it was."
"It's easy to see that Rick wasn't a fan of him," Johanna commented.
Kate nodded. "Castle wasn't a fan of him at all."
"I can't imagine why, can you?" her mother asked wryly as her eyes met her daughter's.
A blush tinged her cheeks. "Mother," she muttered.
Johanna laughed softly but didn't press further on that remark. "What did you think of Rick's disapproval?"
"I didn't think he had any right to judge considering that he was hooked up with his ex-wife at the time," she declared honestly.
"Which one…the blonde one?" her mother asked. "I remember reading about him dating his ex-wife; it was the blonde one I read about…her name escapes me at the moment."
"Gina," Kate supplied. "She's the blonde…she's the one he was with at the time."
The pieces were coming together, Johanna thought to herself. "Was he with her before or after you found the traveling motorcycle doctor?"
"Before."
"Oh," Johanna said; her tone suggesting that she was drawing a conclusion.
Kate cut her gaze toward her. "I did not hook up with Josh to get even."
"Of course you didn't," her mother replied. "You'd never do that."
"Mhmm; tell that to your face."
"I'll look in the other direction until the look fades," Johanna quipped.
"You're nice like that."
"I always do my best for you, sweetheart," her mother declared. "Anyway; Rick was with the blonde…which I don't understand at all…they don't even look right together."
Kate's turned toward her. "Oh my God, you see it too?!" she exclaimed.
Johanna nodded. "How can anyone not see it? I mean look at a picture of them together…it's just not right. She looks much too severe for him…and why on earth would he want to be mixed up with someone at his publishing company…she looks and sounds, from what I've read, like the vindictive sort that would hold any relationship they had previously over his head to get what she wants in the professional sense."
"Rumor has it that she's a real bitch," Kate remarked. "You would've thought that after the divorce he would've found a different person to work with in the company…and yet he sticks with her and complains about it."
"You're right; you would've thought that the work relationship would end too; but then on the other hand; who goes out and dates a woman that he already divorced? Didn't he learn the first time around?"
"Thank you," Kate said, clicking her glass against her mother's.
"For what?"
"For letting me know that I am not the only person who thought that exact same thing!"
Johanna laughed softly. "You're very welcome; any time you need a second opinion on these matters, you just let me know."
"I will," she replied; "It was a bit mind boggling, you know…I kept my opinions to myself but I couldn't help thinking, 'why the hell would you date your ex-wife?' that's just so ridiculous…but then again, he has a past history of screwing Meredith anytime she's in town so really I shouldn't be surprised."
"Seriously?!" her mother exclaimed. "The first wife too? The one who basically abandoned their child?"
"Yeah; that's the one."
"What the hell is wrong with him?"
"Beats the hell out of me…I thought about sending an anonymous note to Doctor Phil a few years ago to see if maybe he could figure it out but then I figured that Dr Phil doesn't have enough time for that."
Johanna laughed. "That would probably take a couple shows."
"Most likely; but Meredith hasn't been in town in a couple years. Alexis went to her for their last visit."
"Men," Johanna muttered.
"Yeah…they're not very picky at times."
"No, they aren't; if they can have it for free and with little effort, they'll go for it."
"That's the truth," she muttered.
Johanna took a sip of her drink. "Did your father meet the doctor?"
Kate laughed. "Yeah, he met him."
"The laughter means it's now necessary for me to hear this tale," Johanna remarked.
"I was off one weekend and Josh was in town; he wanted me to go to lunch with him and I told him I already had plans to meet Dad for lunch…and he invited himself along."
"Oh my; if there's one thing your father hates, it's an unexpected guest when he plans on having someone to himself."
Her daughter nodded. "It was easy for me to see that he wasn't too thrilled about the unexpected guest…it was the first time Dad and I had been able to meet up for lunch in awhile; he had been busy wrapping up his cases and I had been busy with work so he wasn't too happy about Josh tagging along but he did his best to act like he wasn't bothered."
"How did it go?"
"Not too good; they have extremely different personalities and no common interests. Josh hates baseball…"
"Strike one," Johanna quipped.
"Mhmm," Kate murmured; "And Josh talked about himself a lot…you know, that bragging about all of his good deeds across the world."
"Strike two; your father hates a bragger."
"Oh I know; when I first told him I was seeing a guy who was a doctor, Dad said 'Don't date a doctor, Katie; they're egotistical jackasses'."
Her mother laughed. "He never learns that those opinions only make it more appealing."
"I told him Josh wasn't like that…because at the time I didn't realize that he was indeed like that. Anyway; Dad did try really hard to find some common ground but there just wasn't any and I could tell that Josh rubbed him the wrong way with a lot of his comments. He ended up getting called to the hospital in the middle of lunch and it was a relief, to say the least…but Dad seemed to take offense to the blasé way that Josh took off without much feeling toward me…he had to go, he was on call, but Dad said he could've been more caring toward me…could've promised to call or to meet later and he just up and ran; didn't even kiss me goodbye…and assumed that Dad would be fine paying for his lunch."
"Strike three," her mother replied; "A failure of proper treatment toward his baby girl and sticking him with the bill. What did he say once the jerk was gone?"
Kate smiled. "He said; well, Katie; I told you; doctors are egotistical jackasses…and he's one of the most self absorbed jackasses I've ever met my life. You'd be better off on your own if that's all you can find."
Johanna laughed softly. "So he wasn't a fan either."
"Nope; he didn't like Josh at all."
"I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have liked him either," Johanna stated. "He doesn't sound like son-in-law material."
"I have no doubt that you wouldn't have liked him."
"How did that relationship end? Who dumped who?"
"I dumped him."
"Good girl; what made you decide that you had enough?"
Kate sighed and shoved a hand through her hair. "It was right after the shooting," she murmured. "I just couldn't do it anymore. I was a mess and I didn't love him…I was tired of his self absorbed attitude; tired of his snide remarks about Castle…how he blamed him for me getting shot…"
"He blamed him?"
"Yeah; he said it was Castle's fault because Castle encouraged me to pursue your case. I told him that was on me, I made the choice; I never really gave it up, I always came back to it. Yes, Castle helped me with it but it wasn't his fault. He was relentless in his accusations and I guess he had taken it into his head that he was going to hover and suffocate during my recovery and that was the last thing I wanted. I didn't want anyone around…the only exception being Dad. I just had enough, I told him it was over and not to fight me on it because I didn't love him and there was nothing to fight for."
Johanna reached for her hand and gave it a soft squeeze. "Did he take it badly?"
"He was pissed…he said I shouldn't be making life decisions in my condition."
"I would've had to punch him on that one," her mother remarked.
"I thought about it but I was still pretty sore, I wasn't out of the hospital yet" Kate replied, noticing her mother wince at the knowledge. She hated to discuss anything dealing with the shooting, she knew it was painful for her to hear…and it was painful to relive. "I told him I was perfectly capable of making life decisions and that I meant what I said; it was done. He said he knew the real reason was Castle; that he wasn't blind or stupid and if a childish writer was what I wanted, more power to me."
"Wow; he sounds like a real piece of work," Johanna commented.
"He is."
"Just between us…did you deny the accusation about your feelings for Rick?"
Kate took a long sip of her wine. "No; I didn't deny it."
"How much did you tell Rick about the break up?"
"Honestly; I didn't really tell him anything about it other than that we had broken up. He didn't ask so I didn't volunteer."
"Understandable," Johanna replied. "Were you relieved to be out of that relationship?"
"Yeah; I was…I mean he's not a terrible person; he's just more in love with his work and himself than he can ever be with someone else…and it does lead to those jackass tendencies."
Her mother nodded. "I'm glad that you decided that you deserved more than someone who couldn't give you what you need."
"I guess it took me a little while to figure out exactly what it was that I needed."
"We all have that issue to work through at some point in our lives. Was Rick still with Gina at that point?"
"No; they had broken up a few months before."
"I guess he wised up too," she said lightly.
"Yeah; I guess so," Kate said with a grin.
"Any other guys you picked up in bars that Rick had to disapprove of in between liaisons with his ex-wives?" Johanna asked; figuring she may as well dig deep while she was being allowed the privilege.
"No. There was a brief relationship with a robbery detective that we worked a few cases with."
"Workplace romances fair better than barroom ones," Johanna said; "I know that for a fact."
Kate laughed. "Yeah; I know; but this one didn't last long."
"Why not?"
She sighed. "I didn't love him…"
"And?"
Kate shifted in her seat. "If I answer that, I want it to become protected by the mother-daughter confidentiality agreement."
Johanna held out her pinky for Kate to link hers with. "I swear to you that everything said here tonight is protected by the mother-daughter confidentiality agreement."
After their pinky promise and the invoking of their long held agreement for private topics, Kate blew out a breath and told herself that wading into this discussion wasn't a bad thing; that her mother wouldn't judge or blab…that they were in a better place and able to share a few secrets. "Okay; so it was coming up on Memorial Day weekend; and Castle had plans to go to the Hamptons to work on his book; Martha was going to be touring in some show and Alexis was off on some school related trip and he invited me to go along with him. I said no at first; I already had plans to go away…"
"With the other guy?"
"Yeah; but he kept after me about it, because I didn't tell him that my plans were with the other guy. I wasn't as bothered by the repeat invitations as I probably should have been," she admitted; "And they kept sticking in my brain…I kept thinking about it as we worked on a case…and by the end of the case I decided that I didn't want to go with my original plans, that Demming wasn't what I wanted…he was a great guy, he just wasn't the right one. I was going to tell Castle that I had decided to go with him for the weekend."
Johanna's brow rose inquisitively. "What happened?"
"Before I could tell him that I wanted to go; Gina came walking in…he had given up on me and had asked her…that's when they got back together."
"Ouch," her mother said sympathetically; reaching for her hand once more.
Kate nodded. "I only had myself to blame but it stung a little just the same."
"How could it not?" Johanna replied. "I would've been hurt too if I had been in your shoes."
"It took a little while to get over," she admitted; "But maybe the time wasn't right."
"Maybe not," her mother agreed.
Kate took a sip of her wine and then glanced at Johanna. 'Well, now that you've had my doctor story; let's hear about your med student."
Johanna smirked at her. "I already told you a little about that the other night."
"The Cade guy?" Kate asked.
She nodded. "That's the one."
"You left that out of your brief synopsis of that relationship."
"Sorry about that," Johanna said lightly. "Cade Rutherford was a med student."
"And where did you find this Cade Rutherford?"
Johanna took a swallow of wine. "At a frat party."
Kate tsked. "Relationships that begin at frat parties rarely ever last, Mother."
She nodded. "Yes, I'm aware of that now…but back then I was a stupid nineteen year old girl enthralled by a twenty two year old jackass."
"Mhmm; what was so enthralling about this jackass?" her daughter asked.
"Oh, he was very handsome; all the girls swooned over him…you know, one of those guys that could step out of a magazine ad for designer clothes."
Kate's head bobbed in understanding. "That must be a pre-requisite of med school…Josh has been described that way."
"It must go along with the jackass thing," Johanna replied. "But anyway; he was handsome and charming…he knew all the right things to say to dazzle a stupid girl like me."
"You're not stupid."
"I was incredibly stupid when it came to men at that point in my life," Johanna stated. "I couldn't believe that this handsome, rich, popular guy wanted to go out with me…it was like a fairy tale coming true or something. He took me out to nice restaurants, took me to parties; walked me to class…he seemed like such a gentleman."
"But he wasn't; was he?"
"No…it was only a few weeks before he started pressuring to advance the relationship to the next level…and I didn't want to move that quickly. I told him I just wanted to go slow for awhile; I wasn't ready to go there yet."
"What did he say?"
Johanna sighed. "He acted the way, I hoped he would; he said he understood and it was fine; he'd wait until I was ready. He was a good actor; he convinced me that he was being this wonderful, understanding man who didn't think I was a baby for wanting to take things at a slower pace. But he was not an understanding man and he wasn't a gentleman; as I mentioned before. He waited about two weeks and then he took me to this party and made sure my glass was never empty…in fact, I'm pretty sure that was the first time I had gotten drunk. I don't remember anything after agreeing to go back to his room…but it was obvious when I woke up in the morning that he had gotten what he wanted."
Kate's jaw tightened at the thought even though her mother had mentioned it to her previously. "What a bastard…are you sure you were only drunk or did he put something in your drink when you weren't looking?"
"I don't know," she confessed. "I think I was only drunk but I couldn't swear to it; like I said, I don't remember anything past agreeing to go back to his room with him and even that was a bit of a blur. I was angry with him for what had happened…and embarrassed that I had clearly let it happen…and he told me that it had only happened because he loved me. I was stupid…and I guess at that time, I also wanted someone to love me and someone I could love in return and so I bought that excuse and forgave him. I stayed with him for two years."
"What was that time like?" Kate asked.
"At the time I thought it was good…but in hindsight I realized it wasn't all that great; that my naïve heart had been duped by a con man, so to speak. There were snide remarks about my job as a waitress; remarks about being a nerd and studying too much; that I should find something other than the law because he didn't think it was a choice that suited me well. He always brushed those comments off as jokes and I'd believe him. His family didn't like me…your grandfather hated him and told me he was a no good bastard…I should've listened but anything your grandfather was against, in my mind, meant it was just the thing I needed."
"Do you think maybe that's why you held on so long?" her daughter asked.
"No…I really believed that he loved me; and I loved him…at least in that immature way that inexperienced college girls can love. I thought he would marry me…I thought we had a future together. I was wrong. He made a laughing stalk out of me when we broke up; it made it all the more devastating. It was bad enough that he had been cheating on me…and had probably been cheating on me the entire relationship; but to be publicly made a fool of…that just made it all worse."
"How could it not?" Kate murmured.
Johanna sighed. "That whole relationship was a huge mistake…and a hard lesson to learn."
"Could've been worse…he might've married you. I think you dodged a bullet."
Her mother nodded. "I sure did; I was a mess for awhile though. I didn't want anyone to get close like that again."
"You mentioned that before," Kate remarked; "So maybe that gene comes from both of my parents."
She smiled. "I suppose it's possible. I slammed the brakes on a few relationships after the Cade debacle…anytime they wanted to get too close; I'd think up some excuse to get out or I'd put them off until they ended it. After law school; I dated a guy who had no romantic interest in me at all."
Kate laughed softly. "Why?"
"Because Max and I were both looking for the same thing…a companion…someone who didn't expect anything other than someone nice to share a meal with and go see shows with. There were no expectations of love or sex or marriage. It was basically just a nice friendship masquerading as a real relationship to keep people from asking that dreaded 'have you met someone question'."
"Like Grandma," she said with a grin.
"Especially her," Johanna answered; a smile playing on her lips. "I was still seeing Max when I met your father."
"How long did you date him after you met Dad?"
"Your father and I met on May 29th…and Max and I stopped seeing each other in October."
"Is Dad the reason you stopped seeing Max?"
"No; he met someone he was interested in romantically on one of his travels. Max was a businessman who traveled a lot…kind of like your one foot out the door thing."
Kate nodded. "That's definitely an inherited gene."
Johanna took a long sip of her wine. "It wasn't a bad thing though; that relationship with Max; he didn't expect or want anything but he did treat me with a lot of respect and he showed me that there were men out there that I could trust. It didn't obliterate my feelings about relationships and my hesitancy of getting burned again but it helped some. It took your father sneaking past my defenses to get me past those issues."
Her daughter smiled. "He snuck right in, did he?"
"Yeah; he did…and I'm so glad," Johanna murmured. "You know, I didn't realize how bad that relationship with Cade was until I was in a relationship with the right man."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that with your father; he's always been there for me; even before we were dating; he was always there; I could always count on him. I could go to him with any problem; cry on his shoulder, fight with him, ask him for help. Whatever I needed, he always gave and there were never strings attached. I remember times when I was with Cade that I needed a shoulder to cry on and he wasn't there; times when I needed help and he wasn't there; times when I just needed someone to believe in me and support me and he wasn't there. But your father, he's always supported me and done anything he could for me and I've done the same for him; right from the beginning."
"That's not hard to believe," Kate said softly; "I mentioned earlier that the two of you always tackle everything together."
"That's true…and that's not the only thing that was different. With Cade; I was afraid to make him angry…and with Jim, I never had any fear of his anger. He never took advantage of me…anytime I said no, he accepted that and respected it. With Cade; everything had to be about him…and I do mean everything…in every aspect…if you catch my meaning."
Kate nodded. "I think so…he was only concerned with getting what he wanted and the hell with what you might want…in every aspect."
"Right," Johanna said softly; as they tiptoed around the topic. "When you're finally in the right relationship; everything is so much better because you finally learn what it's really supposed to be like…how good it can be when you realize what it's like when you matter to the person you're with and they're more concerned with giving than taking. Cade was a hard lesson to learn…but it made me appreciate finding the right man so much more."
"Then maybe jackass the med student was a good lesson to learn…maybe it taught you to care more about yourself," Kate suggested slowly. "Maybe that's why you didn't slam on the brakes with Dad; you learned what the right thing was and that he'd be the one to treat you the way you deserved to be treated."
"That's true," her mother agreed. "I also learned that I could still believe in fairy tales…I just had to realize that the best ones aren't perfect. My fairy tale romance has plenty of bumps in the road…but I wouldn't trade a minute of it…because it made us stronger and it holds us together still."
"I believe that," Kate murmured. "I guess we weren't meant to be with doctors."
Johanna nodded. "That's the truth…and I'm glad. I'm much more suited to be the wife of a lawyer than a doctor…I don't even like doctors."
Kate laughed. "Yeah, that would've been odd if you had ended up with a doctor given your dislike of them."
"See, I really was stupid back then or I would've figured that out before I wasted two years of my life on that jerk."
"Mother, I think you can be forgiven for being a typical nineteen year old girl who got dazzled by the wrong guy."
Johanna sighed. "I guess we all have to learn that lesson…it does make you appreciate the right man even more when you find him."
Kate gave a nod. "We both dodged a bullet."
Her mother clinked her glass against hers. "We sure did."
"It's too bad you didn't go to school with Dad; he would've taken care of Cade for you. He would've punched him in the face."
"I wish we had gone to school together," Johanna said wistfully. "I probably wouldn't have gotten hooked up with Cade at all if your father had been there to steal my attention; and believe me, he would have. He did meet Cade though."
"He did? How did that come about?"
"We were engaged at the time," she recalled. "In fact it was only a few months before our wedding. Your father and I had a lunch date at an outdoor café…I got there first and I was waiting at the table; figuring that he had gotten held up in court as he was a little late. I was looking at a magazine I had bought from a newsstand on the way there and I hear this voice next to me saying my name. I look up and there's Cade Rutherford."
"Seems like he had a lot of nerve walking up to you after what he had done to you in college," Kate commented.
"Yeah; I thought that myself," Johanna said. "I hadn't seen him since college…had no desire to see him and suddenly there he is. I tried to give him the brush off but he sits down at my table like he's king of the world and strikes up a conversation and says we should get together that night for 'old times sake'."
"Seriously?"
Johanna nodded. "Yeah; he said it would be fun to relive our good times. I informed him that I was engaged and my wedding was in two months. He looked at me and laughed and said that didn't bother him; after all, he was married and it didn't stop him from 'enjoying life' as he put it. I told him it would bother me; that I wasn't that type of person…that I loved my fiancé and I'd never betray him. He thought that was hilarious."
"He must be a world class jackass," Kate declared.
"He is. I asked him what was so funny and he said I was still living with my head in the clouds; that it wouldn't hurt anything to have a little fun…it was just a one night stand for old times sake; it wasn't like he was asking for anything beyond that."
"Please tell me you told him off."
"Oh I did," Johanna confirmed. "I told him off and I told him exactly what I thought of him…and I told him how thrilled I was that I hadn't gotten saddled with him for life; because I had a real man now and he couldn't even hope to be in his class. That was about the time your father showed up…I told him right in front of Cade that he had propositioned me."
"Does Dad go to jail in this story?" her daughter asked.
"No; but he gave him a piece of his mind and told him he better never catch him near me again or he wouldn't like what happened."
Kate smiled. "The jackass is lucky that Dad only threatened."
Her mother laughed softly. "You're right about that."
"Did you ever see Cade after that?"
"Not in person; I saw him in the newspaper once in awhile and in alumni newsletters."
"Oh? Anything juicy?"
"Well; he's been married a few times…"
Kate scoffed. "Can't imagine what might have led to those divorces."
Johanna laughed. "Yeah; it's not hard to paint a picture about that, is it?"
"Nope; any kids?"
"I believe he has at least two; one from his first marriage to Candy the perky little nurse he was dating at the same time as me…and she knew he was with someone and didn't care."
"She probably got her comeuppance when he cheated on her," Kate replied.
"I certainly hope so," Johanna remarked. "I think his other kid may have been with the third wife…who knows what number of wife he's on by now. He was tied up in a big insurance fraud case once back in the mid 90s; I believe his license was suspended for a short period of time."
"Somehow I'm not surprised to hear that he's had a brush with the law."
"Yeah…and who knows how many other brushes he's had; that's just the one that made the papers."
"That must've been a hell of an insurance fraud case."
"Oh it was…he only escaped more severe punishment by ratting out his colleagues."
"Lovely," Kate said with a laugh. "You dodged a major bullet with that one."
"I thank God that I dodged that bullet every day," Johanna assured.
Kate smiled. "Well let's look at it this way; we can both cross the medical professional off the list."
Her mother gave a nod. "I also crossed off advertising executive."
"Oh?"
"Yeah; but that's a story for another time."
"I'll hold you to that," she said; "And just for the record; I've also crossed off firefighter."
"Interesting," Johanna replied.
"You can have that story when you share the advertising executive one."
"Deal. I've also crossed off traveling businessman."
Kate glanced at her. "F.B.I. agent has been crossed off mine."
Johanna wrinkled her nose at the thought. "I'm glad to hear that…I don't want one of those as a son-in-law."
She couldn't help but laugh. "I can understand why…but we should probably discuss these crossed off professions sometime."
"We should," her mother agreed; "It'll make us appreciate the right ones more."
Kate smiled. "This conversation wasn't as bad as I thought it might be."
"I know how to mind my manners and not cross too many boundary lines," Johanna remarked lightly; "But it was nice to be able to talk so freely about such things…maybe it'll help some of that awkwardness you mentioned before when we were discussing relationship issues."
"I think it will," she said, acting on impulse as she reached for her mother's hand.
"I'm glad," Johanna replied softly; her fingers curling around her daughter's.
"Me too."
"Are you going back to work tomorrow?" she asked.
Kate sighed. "Yeah; I'm feeling better."
Johanna held her gaze. "If you'd need me during the night; wake me; I don't mind…no matter the reason; whether you're not feeling well or you've had a bad dream…or you just want to talk."
She squeezed her hand gently as she gave a slight nod. "Okay; I'll keep that in mind. Thank you…for staying up with me this morning."
"Not a problem," her mother replied. "It's my job as your mother."
"I appreciate it just the same," she murmured; "And; I appreciate that you didn't…push about certain things today."
Johanna eyed her knowingly. "Sometimes I don't need to push…sometimes I just know without asking."
"How do you always do that?"
"Mom magic," she quipped; "It's powerful stuff."
A hint of a wistful grin tipped the corner of Kate's lips upwards. "I remember that line."
"I hoped you would…I hope you remember a lot of things, Katie," she murmured.
"I do," Kate assured. "I…hope you remember some things too."
Johanna conjured up a smile; knowing that her daughter had swallowed some deeper sentiment. "I do…I remember it all," she promised. "If you're going back to work tomorrow, we should probably call it a night; you need to get some rest."
"Yeah; you're right; neither one of us got much sleep last night."
"Remember; you can wake me…for anything," Johanna said.
"I won't forget; if I should have insomnia, I will wake you for the story about the ad man."
Johanna laughed. "I'll be happy to tell you a bedtime story if you need one," she replied; that flicker of hope deep inside her growing even stronger. Perhaps she was mending things with her daughter better than she had thought.
