Note: Hopefully yesterday will be the last missed post for a while. xD Sorry, y'all – I was driving back to Libs/unpacking all day.

"I Feel…"

Confused

Why's it always me seeing questions marks in places where the answers used to be?

They say if you get lost, you can use the constellations to find your way back home

But if you don't know where you are, and you don't know where you started

How can you tell which way to go?

"No More Sad Songs" – Kyler England

She didn't understand.

After the Final Scene, it seemed he had left any hesitations about her behind. After she had moved into the palace, it seemed they were closer than ever. She had felt wanted, loved – and that was all before he'd actually said the words. After he first told her he loved her, it seemed he had made his intentions all too clear. As she neared graduation, his mother had started giving her knowing little looks. It seemed the queen was privy to some secret everyone seemed determined to keep from her. And he…

She didn't know what to think anymore. The past two weeks, he seemed to be distancing himself from her. She saw less and less of him, and every time he was around he was so…weird. It was as if he was nervous about something, as if there was something he needed to discuss with her but couldn't find the courage to do so. If she had been someone like Gurenda with an unending supply of self-confidence, she might have thought he was working up the courage to do something official like propose. But she was only Yucie, the farm girl-turned-princess, and she didn't possess the self-confidence years in royalty bred.

As it was, she saw him staring out a window along the hall and felt her heart soar. She called his name, and he looked…panicked. Terrified. And then he ran, and she was left alone in the hall, staring after him and wondering what she had done to so effectively lose his affections.

Envious

'Cause there's nothing holding the stars up in the sky,

No reason or rhyme to this life, nothing keeping us together – you and I, 'cept you and I.

I think the heart is what you make of it – it's not love if it doesn't hurt a bit.

If we just hold on tight, we'll get through this.

You and I, I still believe in you and I.

"You And I" – Kyler England

She wouldn't say she was jealous, really. The feeling of outright agitation that usually accompanied jealousy wasn't there. This was more wistful, more melancholic…this was more envious, not jealous. After all, jealously usually involved wanting to deck whoever was invoking the feeling, and there was a distinct lack of wanting to punch people in the face.

Well.

She wanted to punch Arc in the face, quite frequently actually, but that was besides the point.

Still, there was a definite envy as she watched the couple across the street. They made it look so effortless, the way they flirted and quipped and all but shouted to the world had comfortable and secure they were with the other. Watching them, seeing the way he looked at her, Yucie had no doubt the boy was completely dedicated to his sweetheart. She had no doubt the girl had any reason to question his affections. Likewise, the girl was completely open with the boy: it was obvious she adored him. They flowed around each other, a fullness that comes from years of acquaintance and devotion perfecting their moves. And she would bet her life that, when problems arose, they came to a mutual understanding and acceptance of blame. He would probably seek forgiveness first, even if it was her fault, and she would never be stubborn enough to let their argument last longer than a day. He would never give her a reason to in the first place.

Then again, she didn't really know them. Maybe they had just as many problems as she did with her…with whatever Arc was to her. Maybe to get to that point of familiarity they had years of henpecking and fistfights. Maybe behind closed doors they screamed louder than she did.

But on that street corner, dancing to the music of a passing bard, they didn't look it. They looked like a storybook. They looked like what she wished she could be with Arc.

And no, she wasn't jealous. But she most certainly was envious.

Rejected

The stables were quiet this time of morning. The light of early dawn filtered in through the doors, but the sun was still low enough to keep most of the world in shadow. That was fine. Perfect, really – it made things easier when you were taking the coward's way out.

As the princess tightened the girth on Sunspray, the golden mare the queen had given her shortly after her arrival at the palace, her hand paused against the horse's warm belly. Sunspray looked back at her, apprehension in the horse's posture, and Yucie wondered if taking her was the best idea. Especially when she didn't plan on keeping her. As soon as she was home…as soon as she back with her father, she'd send Cube back with the mare and a note of apology to the queen. She at least owed Erlsel that much.

"Come on, girl," she whispered, leading Sunspray from her stall, "let's go before the sun gets any higher."

"And where are you planning on going, Yucie?"

She froze at the voice, coming just behind her from the direction of…she turned slowly, and there – standing by Mudpie's stall – was Queen Erlsel. A look of supreme disappointment was in the queen's eyes, but somehow Yucie knew it wasn't directed at her. That didn't stop her from feeling guilty, though.

"You know where, your majesty," she said quietly. Sunspray nudged her shoulder, and Yucie placed a hand on the mare's muzzle as the queen approached.

"I had hoped it wouldn't come to this," Erlsel said, and Yucie winced at her words.

"What else would it come to? I…was under the impression the bulk of my duties here stemmed from my impending marriage to Aero," she said, ignoring the queen's frown at her use of the prince's proper name. "Now that that's not happening, I don't see why I should be required to stay."

"Yucie, you're being ridiculous," Erlsel said, reaching out to grasp her hand. "You know Aero still has every intention to marry you."

"No, he doesn't!" Yucie shouted, whipping about so fast her vision nearly spun. Sunspray stepped back, agitated by the sudden aggression in the girl. "You know he doesn't! He can't! If he did, he wouldn't be treating me like I was the plague! He wouldn't be running away from me, or acting like he wished I was gone…and I tried to get him to make me leave, but he wouldn't, so –"

"And isn't that the proof there that he doesn't want you to go?" Erlsel asked, but Yucie shook her head.

"He's just a coward," she bit.

"And yet you are the one attempting to sneak away from the palace before the sun's even risen," Erlsel said. She sighed and squeezed Yucie's hand. "My dear, remember who my son is. Did you honestly think I hadn't seen the signs of an escape attempt before? More importantly, did you honestly think I'd let you leave?"

"Are you to tell me I am a prisoner here, then?" Yucie bit, and Erlsel quickly shook her head.

"Never that," she said. "You know I think of you as a daughter, Yucie. I would never trap you here."

"Then you'll let me go?" Yucie asked, but again Erlsel shook her head.

"I would never trap you here, but I cannot let you leave, either. At least not without earnestly begging you to reconsider," she said. "Yucie, give him a bit more time. If the situation has not improved by the graduation ball…then the very next day, I will escort you back to Sir Gunberd myself."

"You seem so sure that he actually cares anymore…" Yucie mumbled, and Erlsel laughed.

"My dear, I know he does. He just needs to stop being so stubborn and let you know that, too," she said, winking at her. The princess remained unconvinced. She turned back to Sunspray, resting her head against her muzzle before nodding.

"All right. Until the ball," she said, "but the very next morning, I return to my father."

"The very next morning," Erlsel agreed, but silently she prayed with all she had that that would not be the case.

Sad

We came, we saw, we conquered and crumbled

In our own true way

We loved, we fought, we rocked, and we tumbled

In our own true way

"Own True Way" – Great Big Sea

"Whoooooo!" Gurenda let out a whoop as she waved her arm above her head. Beth cried out as liquid was flung from the bottle in the Demon Princess's hand, but Gurenda's mood was undeterred by the Fairy Princess's shout. Her arm just came back down, looping around Beth's neck as she gave the girl a lascivious grin. "What's the matter, huh? It's just a little wine – and we're celebrating here!"

"I don't mind the wine. I just prefer drinking it, not wearing it!" Beth snapped, snatching the bottle from Gurenda and taking a swig. Gurenda cackled, slapping her knee in delight.

Yucie smiled at her friends' antics, and for the first time in a long time it was a truly genuine smile. They had every right to celebrate: they had finally completed their second stint at the Princess Academy. They had left the graduation ceremony a few hours before, and the next night Erlsel was throwing a celebratory ball for the girls.

It would be her last night at the palace.

She pushed the melancholy thought away and took a sip from the fizzy, alcohol-free beverage she had insisted on when Gurenda pulled out the wine. Though Gurenda would claim she had every right to get completely pissed off her rocker, and would most likely even encourage it, Yucie couldn't bring herself to drink – at least not yet. She still had to be level-headed for the ball tomorrow, and somehow she didn't think getting drunk would help her deal with her Aero situation any better.

She had given him the time Erlsel had asked for. He had made nothing of it. And now, the morning after the morrow's ball, she would be…

But enough of those thoughts. She was here to celebrate with her friends, and celebrate she would. The past year had been exhausting, but in the end she had survived. And now…well, anything, she guessed. The day really was the start of a new chapter, one she had been waiting a long time to start writing. No more curse. No more school. No more palace. She was completely starting over, and so much was going to change –

"You're drinking too much – it's my turn!" Gurenda shouted, snapping her out of her thoughts. She smiled as Beth held the bottle just out of the demon's reach. Well, maybe not that much.

"You would think Miss Gurenda would have been smart enough to procure more than one bottle," Kokoru said, smiling in that way she had that Yucie couldn't tell if she was uncomfortable or embarrassed. Even after two years of friendship, she was still as proper as ever. Yucie doubted she would ever be comfortable with Gurenda's brasher nature.

"She did. She had to have," Yucie said, looking back to them. "Gurenda's smarter than that."

"One would wonder," Erumina said, sipping her tea. Yucie laughed as she leaned back in her chair.

"I wonder a lot with Gurenda, but not when it comes to her spirits. That woman can hold her liquor," she said. Kokoru snorted on a giggle, and Yucie grinned at her. She was no doubt recalling their last trip to the beach, where Gurenda had gotten so drunk…well. The next morning hadn't been pretty, and that weekend had been enough to convince Yucie she should probably stay away from the harder stuff Gurenda was so fond of.

"I'm the Princess of the Demon World," Gurenda had said. "Vices are part of the job description."

She leaned back against her chair and took another sip of her drink. She grinned at Kokoru.

"So…what's next, Kokoru? What are you planning on doing now that you're free of the Princess Academy?" she asked, and Kokoru shrugged.

"To be honest, I'm not really sure," she said. She glanced over at Beth, a warm smile curling her lips. "I know I must return home to the Spirit World, as I have duties there that have been long neglected during my time here. But…well. I have some reasons to return, on occasion."

Yucie beamed, happy for her friend. It hadn't been easy for the girl, what with her shyness and horrible self-image. She had grown so much over the past two years; Yucie couldn't be more proud of her. And then when they had met Beth…Yucie had secretly been pulling for them since the beginning, since she first noticed the blushes and flustered conversations the two were so fond of. It was obvious they were perfect for each other, and yet the reception of the budding relationship hadn't exactly been positive. For Beth's people, that she was interested in being with another princess was no big deal; however, the Spirit World was a bit more…old-fashioned. Their road certainly hadn't been easy.

"So you've spoken to your father, then?" Erumina asked, a look of genuine concern and friendship softening her expression. Kokoru gave her a weak smile.

"…yes. He's still not…overly fond of the idea, but…he's willing to give it a chance. The last time we spoke, he said keeping me in his life was more important than sounding off over any potential romantic interests," she said. Erumina's smile was slightly pained, no doubt due to her own father issues, but she seemed genuinely happy for her friends.

"I'm glad things are looking up for you two," she said. "You both deserve happiness."

"And what about you, Erumina?" Yucie asked. Erumina jumped at the question, turning surprised eyes on the girl. "What are you next big plans?"

"I am returning to Heaven to resume my duties there," she said. "Father has informed me that I will be meeting my fiancée upon my return – oh, yes. There will be a ball to announce the engagement in a fortnight. You will both attend, won't you?"

"Wait – you're getting engaged?!" Yucie nearly shouted, loud enough to draw the attention of their bickering and blitzed friends.

"WHAT?!" Gurenda shouted, dropping the bottle she had finally procured from Beth to the ground and shattering it.

"It is tradition in Heaven for betrothals to be arranged by the parents at a young age," Erumina said calmly. "I have been engaged the entire time I've known you, though this week will be the first time I am meeting my intended."

"I can't believe you never told us! That is so like you! You…you…I can't believe you're just springing this on us like it's no big deal!" Gurenda snapped, stalking over and plopping down in the chair next to Erumina. Beth slid in next to Kokoru, casually slinging an arm around her shoulders.

"Congratulations…I think? This is a good thing, right?" she asked, and Erumina nodded with her usual reserve.

"I am…pleased," she said. "It is what is expected of me. I have no objections to the arrangement, at any rate."

"Erumina…" Yucie said, something in her heart cracking at her friend's words. Erumina looked at her, and the propriety faded away as the angel gave her a genuine smile.

"Not every realm allows their rulers to marry for something as honorable as true love," she said, "and I will not fight my father or my kingdom on this issue. I am content with their decision, Yucie."

"If you're happy with it, then we're happy for you. And we'll definitely be there," Yucie said, smiling as she grabbed her hand in both her own and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"And will you bring Prince Aero?" Erumina asked, and there it was again. Silence settled over the table, and Yucie's gaze had locked onto the cup she was holding almost as firmly as her hands were gripping it. She hadn't mentioned her relationship troubles to her friends yet. Well…she'd broken down the week before to Kokoru, who – judging from the looks she was getting – had undoubtedly told Beth, but Gurenda and Erumina seemed confused by her sudden sullen demeanor.

"I…that might not be happening," Yucie finally said. "Actually, after the ball tomorrow, I'm moving back home. Aero and me –"

"Wait, wait, wait – 'Aero'?" Gurenda asked, her eyes wide. "Since when do you actually call the Prince by his real name?"

"Hey, I wasn't gonna think about this today – aren't we supposed to be celebrating?" Yucie asked, throwing on a fake grin, but her friends still looked concerned. She sighed and looked back to her cup. "Guys, I'm ok, I promise. I'll explain everything, just…not today? I want to focus on being happy for everyone today. And…"

"Yucie?" Erumina asked, and Yucie grinned at her.

"I'll be there," she said, and this time the smile seemed more genuine. "I wouldn't miss your party for the world, Erumina."

None of the others looked fully convinced, but they let it slide and went back to celebrating their graduation. There would be time for more serious discussions later.

Jealous

He felt his face tighten as his eyes narrowed in a deadly glare. The look was focused on the back of the coiffed-up head flirting with his intended. The duke had been accosting her for most of the night, and what was worse…she seemed to be enjoying it. She would laugh at his stories, smile the entire time they spoke in a way that was just a bit too friendly for his liking, and he even caught her blushing a few times at some compliment the duke had paid her.

Like that blush that stained her lovely face right now, even as the duke reached up and brushed a stray bit of hair out of her eyes. His fists clenched behind his back, and he forced himself to look away. Back to the ball, to the couples twirling around on the dance floor. That should be them, out there dancing and having a grand old time, instead of standing on opposite ends of the ballroom with a pretentious duke flirting with her while he was forced to watch and do nothing.

The whole ball was ludicrous. His mother just loved to throw a party, and she often looked for even the most meager excuse to hold a ball. Tonight it was to celebrate the girls' graduation from the Princess Academy. He was beginning to think it was just her way of playing matchmaker for them all.

Yucie's laugh caught his ear again, and he felt a growl rip from his chest as the duke took her hand and began leading her to the dance floor.

"Highness?" Frederik asked, startled by his actions. He didn't bother answering his guard.

"The hell she will…" he bit out, moving quickly to intercept the duke before they could begin their dance. He'd be damned if she was dancing with anyone other than him that night…