HI!
Here I am again with a new chapter!
I should be studying what Niestzche had to say about metaphores and an endless list of topics for my Grammar class and yet I've spent the entire day translating this story for you... If I fail my exams you will be the ones to blame. Just kidding ;) Don't get used to this fast updates because maybe sometime I won't be able to keep it this way. So... enjoy it while it lasts.
About last chapter's reviews, a lot of you asked me to write in Damon's POV. The original story is written entirely from Elena's POV and for now I'm gonna keep it that way. I would have to change the whole story to tell it from Damon's POV and right now the only reason why I'm able to update regulary is because I'm not actually writing but only translating a story I've already written a long time ago.
Don't worry, we'll soon learn more about Damon's past ;)
Love, Luna.
PS: Remember to leave your thoughts in the review box ;)
Chapter 6: Baby Steps
Cause all I know is we said hello
And your eyes look like coming home
All I know is a simple name, everything has changed
One month.
One month has passed since Wendy was born and her body barely shows some positive signs. I don't have enough time in the day to think about how much I miss her and the two hours I get to spend with her every day are not even close enough to ease my need to be by her side.
But as odd as it may sound, Wendy is not the only topic in my mind lately. Since that day at the coffee shop, my relationship with Damon has became even more strange than it was before. I can't get him out of my mind and his behavior doesn't help. He hasn't mentioned anything about us since the day I told him that I wanted him, since the day we kissed for the first time. It's impossible for me to understand him. He steals kisses from me every time he gets the change like if it is the most normal thing in the world but he hasn't actually said anything about us or our relationship. He's driving me crazy. And the worst thing is that I'm starting to get used to him. The feeling of his hand taking mine, the taste of his kisses in the morning and before he goes home, his beautiful words, all those hours drinking coffee from the machine and just having him around.
We are in the middle of a dangerous game and I don't want it to stop.
This morning I wake up at 6am and I'm especially excited because a few hours ago, I got a text from Damon that kept me awake for most of the night.
"I have great news for you when you come to see Wendy -D"
I make the long walk to the hospital faster than ever, almost as if I have somebody following me and when I get to the hospital I don't have enough patience to wait for the elevator so I decide to take the stairs as fast as I can.
"Slow down, Lena. It looks like you are running from somebody who wants to kill you" those are the words Damon choses to greet me with and I glare at him.
"I think I lost him in the park" I joke and then I take a seat beside him and I notice that he has two cups of coffee from the machine "Thanks" I say taking one.
"Hey! What makes you think that's yours?"
"It is" I smile after taking a sip "You are becoming quite predictable, you bring me coffee every morning"
"Well, this morning is different, I know a little girl who..."
"SHH!" I interrupt "I don't want to hear that. I know it's good news and if you tell me know I won't be able of going through the next fifty five minutes of my life without seeing her. I'll wait until I can go inside"
"As you wish" he smiles at me.
"Do you think it will be too long before I can take her home with me? I miss her so damn much..."
"I'd love to tell you that you'll be able to take her home with you really soon but that's a promise I can't keep. It's better for you if you don't have such high expectations."
"Thanks for taking care of me" I say looking into his eyes.
"I'll always take care of you, love" he tells me and this time, his kiss doesn't surprise me. He is confusing as hell, but he's the sweetest human being I have ever came across in my life and his lips taste like heaven so I don't say anything and enjoy the feeling of his lips on mine while it lasts.
"I shouldn't be getting used to this..." I say against his lips.
"Why not?"
"Forget it. It's just... nothing." I sigh.
"C'mon Elena, talk to me. It makes you feel better and it makes me happy. You can tell me"
He's right, he knows that talking to him makes me feel relaxed.
"I'm scared" I confess "My relationship with Kai started like this. It was something I couldn't understand, something that clouded my mind... I don't want to go through something like that again, Damon"
"Hey..." he whispers pulling my chin up so he can look me in the eyes "I promise you, I'm not going to hurt you like he did, Elena. I'm sorry about this... I know you deserve something better but I can't give you more right now... I don't want to lose you"
"I don't want to lose you either... But I'm scared. This.. us... I've never felt this way, and the only time I felt something close to this I ended up getting hurt"
"I'm trying" he adds and it sounds like a promise "I want to give you more, I want to be what you need. I think I'm getting there. I'm not gonna hurt you, Elena. I promise"
"I believe you" I whisper and he smiles at me but I can't return the gesture.
"You ok?"
"Yeah, I'm fine"
"Elena... you know I can tell when you're lying"
"I'm just nervous, I want to see Wendy right now. That's all"
"C'mon, Lena. I know that's not all that's going on. What is it?"
"I'm sorry... I..." I start to talk but suddenly a young woman dressed in white interrupts us. It's obvious that she's a nurse.
"Hello, Damon"
"Sage?" his eyes open wide at the sight of her and she gives us a wicked grin. I haven't even said a word to her, but I don't like her.
"Is that all? After all the time we've spent apart?"
"What are you doing here, Sage?"
"You don't remember? I also love this job Damon. I got my diploma a few months ago and now I'll work here. Don't you love it? We'll spend lots of time together, like the old times..."
"Didn't you have enough the last time? I want you out of my life" I can see the pain in Damon's eyes as he watches her and for some reason I have the feeling that she is dangerous.
"Oh... C'mon Damon" she says trying to imitate a little girl "Katherine wasn't such a big deal anyway. And what I did just sped up the process. I just wanted us to be together" she smiles "But if you want me to say this, here it goes: I'm sorry" she says slowly, a wicked smile playing on her lips.
"I don't believe you Sage, leave us alone"
"I made you a favor, Damon. I don't know why you still can't get over that"
"A favor?!" he nearly shouts and for the first time I see hate in his beautiful blue eyes "I gotta get out of here, Elena"
Damon takes my hand in a gesture that is becoming quite common between us and he makes me follow him until we reach the hospital's coffee shop downstairs. He is running away and I don't understand anything. I've never seen Damon so upset. Who the hell was that woman? How did she manage to upset him like that?
"What was all that?" I ask him when we finally stops.
When I look into his eyes I feel my heart twitching. Tears. He has tears in his baby blue eyes and I can almost feel the pain and the rage running through his veins. I feel the weight of the whole world in my shoulders when I see him like this and, unable to do anything else, I pull him closer and hug him just like he does when I'mt the one who needs it. Even when I can't see him, I feel his smile against the skin of my neck and he clings to my body so tightly that I feel like he wants to disappear inside me. It's another one of those moments that I will never forget in my life.
"Thank you" he whispers against my ear without letting go of me.
"You don't have nothing to thank me for" I smile "Are you ok?"
"I don't know... seeing her..." he sighs "I'm glad I had you by my side. Thank you, Elena..." he tells me and he kisses my forehead before finally letting me go.
"Nothing to thank for" I repeat trying to hide the fact that I'm really worried about him, I've never seen him like that before.
"Coffee?" he asks when the silence starts to be a little awkward.
"Yeah. Sure, we still have to wait a few minutes until I can go to see Wendy"
"Don't worry, she's fine. She's getting better and better everyday"
"I'm so happy to hear that..." I smile at him while we walk to the bar to get our drinks. "Damon?"
"Yeah?"
"I... I wanted to know..."
"What can I get you?" the young girl behind the bar interrupts me.
"Cappuccino?" Damon asks me and I just nod "Two cappuccinos"
"Anything else?"
"No, thanks"
"Ok, I'll be right back with your coffee Dr Salvatore"
"What were you saying?" Damon asks me once we get our drinks and we go to sit.
"Who was that woman, Damon?" I ask him so fast that for a second I think he hasn't understood what I said. But something in his eyes shifts. Something gets darker. He's in pain, I'm sure of that.
"Her name's Sage" he tells me carefully "I dated her when I was in highschool. A few years after that, I was going through a difficult situation and I made the mistake of trusting her. She took everything I loved from me and I hadn't seen her since then until today. I've never thought I'd see her again, but here she is"
I takes me a second to process the information but there is too much of his story that I don't know that it's difficult to connect the dots. I can't quite figure out what Sage has done to him, all I know is that it wasn't good, not at all.
"I'd love to help you, but I don't understand" I tell him taking his hand "I would if I knew the rest of the story... You can tell me if you want but it's ok if you don't want to. I'm here, Damon... for anything you need, I'm here."
"I know" he takes my hand and rises it to his mouth to softly kiss my knuckles.
I know that there's a lot more to that story than what he has told me. His relationship with this Sage girl is a story I want to know, I somehow know that this has something to do with the past he doesn't want to tell me about, those memories that don't let him live a normal and happy life. Those memories I so desperately want to help him get over. His past: one of the many things that are standing between he and I.
It feels like we have the whole world against us. He's nine years older than me and I haven't even finished high school. Wendy's on the hospital and when I can finally take her home with me taking care of here is going to be anything but easy. My mom, my friends and the rest of the world will never support a relationship like ours.
The differences between us are almost infinite and I don't even know if he wants to have any kind of relationship with me at all. After all, I'm only a dreamy teenager and he's a grown man.
I need to stop what I'm feeling for him before it's too late. Our story seems too impossible to have hope.
We wait for another twenty minutes and time seems to speed up, soon it's time to see my little girl and all the negative thoughts disappear clouded by the joy that being able to see her brings me. Suddenly I remember Damon's words from earlier and the text he sent me in the middle of the night. Good news. I need to find out what changed.
I get inside the NICU and clean my hands in record time. There's nothing I want more than seeing my baby girl.
"Stop shaking, Elena..." Damon whispers softly touching my arm "You can come in"
"Thank you" I smile at him as he lets me in.
I can barely stop the impulse of running towards my little daughter. Instead, I walk till I reach her incubator and my heart seems to stop beating for a moment. I can see Wendy's face without any obstacle in the middle. She's no longer breathing by means of a machine. Nobody could ever understand the depts of my happiness in this second. I'm happy, absolutely happy because my baby girl is finally starting to recover.
My smile mixes with tears of emotion and joy. After so much time, I was finaly crying happy tears.
"She's so beautiful" I whisper with a lump in my throat.
As carefully as ever, I reached out to touch her through the incoubator and I fall silent. Her chest slowly going up and down with every breath. The undeniable sign of her soul fighting for life.
"She's breathing" I smile when Damon approaches.
"You see? I told you she would get better"
"I can't believe this..." I mumble hipnotized by her beauty.
"Elena..." he says carefully "There's something you should know"
"What?"
"Whendy's getting better... Right now she can breathe by herself and I really hope that she keeps on this track" his words have that soft tone he uses when he wants to tell me a piece of bad news and I instantly get scared.
"What do you mean?"
"I have to tell you that this doesn't mean that she'll be able to breath by herself forever. It's dangerous to detach her from the oxygen tube, we're just trying, I can't confirm that she won't need help to breath anymore..."
"Is she in danger? Does this mean this is a bad thing?"
"The fact that she's able to breath by herself even if it is for a short period of time is great news, but I'd be lying if I told your that she's no longer in danger. Her condition is still pretty critical"
His words hit me like a wrecking ball. The pain expands inside my until it reaches my bones and I end up confused and sad. I don't really understand if I should worry or if I should be happy because she's breathing.
"Everything will be ok, I'll take care of her" he whispers in my ear and I relax agains his touch allowing him to hold me while I stroke my little baby's skin.
Both of our pasts are dark and sad, maybe his more than mine. Future is uncertain in every possible way. But this moment here, this second of joy we share while we watch my little baby breathing deeply in her sleep, this is the present we're living in. And right now this second feels eternal.
