Delphine was nervous, very nervous. There were some things in this world that were never meant to go together and Cosima Niehaus and driving was one of them. Delphine always drove, except for today. Cosima was supposed to pick her up from her job at six o'clock. It was six twenty. Cosima was late. If her car hadn't been in the shop, she wouldn't have this problem. But it was in the shop and she did have a problem. She loved Cosima to bits, but a combination of Cosima's possible ADHD and habit of talking with her hands meant that her driving skills were very poor. She always made a point to drive wherever they went, but this time she knew Cosima wouldn't let her. It was Cosima's car after all and Cosima would argue that Delphine never let her drive. Delphine was looking at her watch when a car skidded to a stop in front of her. It was Cosima. She was smiling happily at Delphine and Delphine couldn't help but smile back.
She got into the passenger's side of the car and wasn't even buckled when Cosima took off, basically flooring it. Delphine hit the brakes out of reflex. "Sorry I'm late, babe. I stopped to get a hamburger, I was starving." Cosima said. She waved her hamburger in Delphine's face. "Wanna bite?" Cosima looked at her, one hand on the wheel and eyes off the road.
"No, thank you. Just watch the road." Delphine tried not to sound nervous. She still didn't know how to break it to Cosima that she hated her driving.
"You sure?" Cosima asked. Delphine nodded, she was too afraid to talk. "Your loss, then." Cosima then did the unthinkable. She put the hamburger in her left hand and picked up her drink with her right, only her knee was left steering the two ton death trap. They began to swerve a little. Cosima jerked the wheel back into position after she set down her drink. "Whoa! Sorry babe!" Cosima said. Delphine thought her heart stopped.
Then Cosima was done with her burger. Delphine let out a sigh of relief thinking her girlfriend would focus on the road. "So how was your day?" Cosima asked
"It was good." Delphine replied her eyes still locked firmly on the road and her foot pressing against an invisible brake as they almost rammed a minivan in front of them.
"Just good?" Cosima asked. Every time she asked a question she would take her eyes off the road and look at Delphine. Delphine wanted conversation to stop.
"Yeah, it was good. Just a normal day." Delphine said.
"Well that's good." Cosima said. "My day was great, thanks for asking." She was going to start talking and Delphine knew it. "I had to babysit Kira today because Felix, Sarah, and Ms. S. had to rescue Tony and Alison from jail this morning. So Tony hit on this guy, a cop, but Tony didn't know that, and his wife freaked out when they started flirting and she pushed him down which was totally rude, she was half-giant by the way." Cosima's hands were flying through the air, the wheel a forgotten memory. "Tony was lying on the floor and then Alison, who was obviously drunk, pushed the chick back for him. The chick slapped Alison in the face. Then Alison basically tackled the chick to the ground, I wish I could've seen it."
"You're swerving." Delphine says, but Cosima doesn't seem to hear her. They are swerving into another lane.
"So Alison and this chick are rolling on the ground," Cosima says, "Alison is beating the crap out of her. Tony is recording the whole thing, it's hilarious by the way, I have to show you. And the cop is trying to pull Alison off his wife…"
"You're swerving!" Delphine practically shouts at Cosima, she reaches for the wheel and yanks the car back to their side of the road. A semi passes by them right after Delphine pulls the wheel.
"Whoa, dude, chill. I got this." Cosima says looking at Delphine whose eyes are wide with horror.
"Chill? You want me to chill?" Delphine says frustrated, "We were nearly taken out by a semi!"
"Yeah, but we weren't, we're totally fine." Cosima says. Delphine looks at Cosima like she's crazy. "Babe, what's wrong?"
"What's wrong? You're driving, that's what's wrong!" Delphine says loudly
"What? You don't like my driving?" Cosima says softly, kind of hurt by Delphine.
Delphine sees the sad look on Cosima's face and instantly regrets saying anything. "I'm sorry chérie, but you don't drive…well." She tries to make it as painless as possible.
"Oh." Cosima says. "I'm sorry." By now they have arrived home and are sitting the in the driveway. She's embarrassed.
"Cosima, don't be like that." Delphine says. "You just need to pay more attention to the road, that's all. You always seem so distracted."
"Well duh, have you seen my girlfriend? I can't help it that she's gorgeous and I can't take me eyes off of her." Cosima says
"You're blaming me for your bad driving?" Delphine asks
"Yup." Cosima's smile returns and so does Delphine's. Cosima leans over the seat and kisses her on the nose.
Delphine rolled her eyes. "So cheeky." She said "So how big was this chick that Alison was fighting?"
Cosima smiles as they leave their car and head to the house. "She was like a foot taller than Alison and super buff. Here, let me show you." She pulls out her phone and shows Delphine footage of Alison tackling a very large woman. Cosima wasn't exaggerating, the woman was a giant. Delphine made a mental note to never get on Alison's bad side.
