Ok. So, before we begin this chapter, I think you deserve an explanation for my loooooong absence. When my computer died, I was crushed, because this one is total trash and almost impossible to work with. I didn't do anything for a while because I hung on to some infantile hope that it could be salvaged. When we'd tried everything, two things were happening simultaneously. My father told me that if I could save up some cash, he'd give me his old laptop for a fraction of the price. It was also nearing the end of the school year, and every teacher and their sister seemed to want to give us some humongeous project. (4 power points, a science fair, a poetry journal where we needed tons of cutouts and 6-10 original thought inspiring poems, a huge decorated panel thing about a book we'd read, tons o' math etc…) and those combined things helped to drive this out of my head. I also had some serious writers block. I know it's really no excuse, and you probably want me to get on with the story now, but I thought I should explain myself.
Alrighty then, I'm pretty much completely redoing this, because the original was horrible.
Max POV:
The whitecoats came into the room again. I was really scared they'd take me, because they like to do stuff to me. Jeb calls it 'spearmints', but I looked it up and spearmints are like a plant or something, so I don't know what he's talking about.
But today they took Iggy. I reached out to him as they lead him away, and I knew he knew how much I wanted to help him. At first, I tried to help them when they got taken, but the whitecoats took us so much it was real hard, and I just ended up getting hurt.
Iggy looked really scared, he's the most scared of all of us when they take him. I felt really sad for him because I know how much it scares him. .
Iggy POV:
The whitecoats came into our room and tried to take me. I was really scared, because they do scary stuff to me. Max grabbed my hand and she looked like she wanted to help, but when she tried they always got mad and sometimes hit her.
They took me to one of the big rooms. I think they have a bajillion of them in here. Then they strapped me to a table and the lady said "we're gonna put you on some anesthetic honey. I promise it's not scary", and then she smiled that creepy smile that they all have, and I wanted to tell her that it was already scary, but I couldn't move my mouth.
Then the lady put a big mask over my mouth and it got all dark, and she was like, "scalpel", but it sounded far away…
………………………..
I was lying on the table again, awake, but I couldn't open my eyes. I kept trying, until I heard the lady come over. I said "lady, why can't I open my eyes?" her voice sounded funny when she said, "your eyes are open, Iggy. Wide open."
3rd person:
It was a fairly simple procedure, and the doctors Heathrowe and Morticai knew it. All they had to do was get the blades behind the retinas, release the netting, and sever the cords. But no. Of course that simple task couldn't be accomplished without some imbecile screwing up!
Granted, it wasn't exactly their faults. If the experiment on the next table hadn't gone into myocardial infarction, they wouldn't have looked up, or in a moment of confusion, tightened their grip in the blades just too much, severing both optical cords before the netting was ready to bond them. But goodness! The child was totally and irreversibly blind! Forever! Jeb was ready to fry them.
Max POV:
They carried Iggy back into the room. He ran to me, stumbling and saying my name, like he couldn't find me. He came to me because I'm the oldest, so I'm like everybody's mommy. We don't have any real mommies, see.
When Iggy got to me, he looked really sad, so I hugged him, and he kinda collapsed into my lap, while I rocked him and he started crying. He whispered, "Max, I can't see anymore. I think it's forever." I was stunned. I whispered back "don't worry, we'll all help you. I promise, we'll be your eyes." I was a promise I hoped I'd be able to keep forever.
So, this is my new version of this chapter. I'll list the reasons for changing it on my next chapter.
I've had to add all my slang into my dictionary. It's pretty funny what I can get away with now. None of the words in this had the stupid red underline.
Did you know that gmail counts review alerts as ongoing conversations? Took me so long to figure that out…… I was weirding out because so many pplz did story alert and stuff, but I could only find 2 reviews. Then I realized that I had about 9 backed up behind the first…..
R&R&R&R&R&R&R&R&R&R&R???? Prease? First 15 people to comment win 37 ½ Rosie fantabulous points! (And some free virtual tofu dogs!)
Return to Top
