I admit I'm having difficulties thinking up funny vampire-related ideas for this story, so the updates may be a bit far apart. I will try to update (hopefully) once a week…
I'm Sorry 7
Anakin scowled at his master. "Master, must I go to the doctor? There's nothing wrong with me really…"
"Anakin!" Obi-Wan glared at his young apprentice. "Floating up near the ceiling is not normal! Nor is the desire to chew on my neck and growing fangs! You are going to the doctor and that's final!"
"Yes, Master." Anakin dutifully followed the older man out into the long corridor and headed for the medical section of the Temple. He imagined how fun it would be to zoom down the long hallway as fast as he could but knew his Master would never allow it. Obi-Wan knew how to take the fun out of everything!
A short time later the two men walked into the doctor's office.
"Well, what's the problem?" The Doctor asked.
"My Padawan grows long fangs at night, has a desire for red foods and he was floating up near the ceiling yesterday." Obi-Wan explained. "I think he's a vampire!"
"A vampire?" The Doctor replied, his eyes growing wide in surprise. "Are you sure you haven't been watching too many holovision movies?"
"No, of course not!" Obi-Wan fumed. "I don't have time for badly made films! I have work to do and this vampire nonsense is stopping it. I suggest you take a blood test…"
Anakin licked his lips.
Obi-Wan shook a finger at him. "Now you stop that!"
"I'm sorry, Master," Anakin looked innocently at the older Jedi. "Did I do something?"
"Yes, you were licking your lips! I know exactly what you're thinking!" Obi-Wan kept a watchful eye on his young apprentice with the odd appetite. "The blood is for the doctor to test, not for you to be taste-testing!"
The Doctor stood open-mouthed and watched the two in shock. Snapping out of it, he blinked several times. "Are you suggesting that he has been drinking blood?"
"Of course he has!" Obi-Wan cried. "He's a vampire! I told you he was!"
"But vampires are…" the Doctor started to say.
"Fictional." Obi-Wan interrupted. "Yes, I know. But somehow he caught it. I thought perhaps that Sith Lightning that Dooku fried him with…"
Sighing, the Doctor went to prepare for the blood test. A few moments later he came back with a needle and various other equipment. Poking the needle into a vein on Anakin arm, he took his sample.
Anakin's blue eyes darkened and slowly changed to red. Fangs protruded from between his lips and he hungrily stared at the blood-filled needle the Doctor held in his hands.
"LOOK! LOOK!" Obi-Wan pointed excitedly. "He's a vampire! See?"
Gulping, the Doctor raced from the room with terror on his face. "I … I'll be right back! I have to test this!"
Anakin shifted his hungry gaze to Obi-Wan. "Master, let me test your blood…"
"NO!" Obi-Wan commanded, his voice firm. "Now you stop that! It's daytime, remember?"
The red faded from his eyes and the fangs grew shorter. "I'm sorry, Master. It was the smell…"
Obi-Wan sighed and ran a hand through his thick reddish hair. "Keep this up and I'll be getting gray hair!"
"I'm sorry you're getting gray hair, Master."
"I'm not getting gray hair!" Obi-Wan corrected.
"And I'm sorry about the bags under your eyes as well…"
"Bags!" Obi-Wan cried, horrified. He swiftly spun around and snatched a shiny instrument off the Doctor's tool table to try and examine his face in the reflection. "What bags? I do not have bags!"
Obi-Wan turned back to face his Padawan and found the young man gone! Putting the instrument down, Obi-Wan grumpily stalked out of the exam room. He glanced up and down the hall of the medical section, an angry scowl on his hairy face. "Now where did he go?"
Feeling pulled in one direction, Obi-Wan headed towards the right. He passed by more exam rooms and slowly realized he was heading towards the surgery ward. He remembered this corridor all too well. Anakin had his new arm attached here. "Now what is that boy up to? Why can't he be normal for once?"
A loud gurgling sound reached the Jedi's ears and he paused, slightly confused. It sounded as if someone was pouring liquid… Following the sound, Obi-Wan pushed open a door and peered in.
Anakin stood before a water cooler, a giant pool of water at his boots. A refrigerator door stood open, red bags of blood visible. The Chosen One was happily pouring the bags of blood into the empty water cooler. Of course, now it was a blood cooler!
"ANAKIN!" Obi-Wan yelled angrily. "What in the Force are you doing?"
"Getting a drink?" Anakin asked hopefully, his hands paused in the act of pouring.
"That blood is not for you!" Obi-Wan hurried over and closed the refrigerator door. 'You're making a mess! And you're not going to drink that! You have no idea who it came from!"
Anakin put the partly empty bag of blood down. "I'm sorry, Master. The smell brought me here…"
"Well, I suppose I should be thankful you didn't leap on some poor soul getting operated on!" Obi-Wan grimaced at the idea. He stared at his unruly apprentice. "We will have to do something about that nose of yours…"
"I like my nose, Master!" Anakin fearfully cried. "Don't chop it off!"
"I meant putting something strong smelling under it so you won't go bonkers when you smell blood!"
"Oh…" Anakin glanced at the partly filled blood cooler and licked his lips hopefully.
"Come along!" Obi-Wan gripped him tightly by the arm and forcefully pulled the young man from the room. He thought the medical staff was in for a nasty surprise when one of them entered the room. But he had enough of problems with Anakin; he couldn't clean the wet floor as well. As for the cooler, well, he hoped some innocent nurse wouldn't think it was fruit punch. "We should get back to the exam room."
Anakin allowed himself to be dragged down the hallway until his eyes fell on a snack machine. Obi-Wan had walked right past it paying it no heed but the red licorice inside called to the Chosen One. He dug his heels into the floor and yanked himself free of his Master's grasp.
Obi-Wan turned to see Anakin's face pressed up against the glass of the snack machine, white slobber dripping from his open mouth. The Jedi clamped a hand over his blue eyes and groaned. Returning the hand to his side, Obi-Wan took a deep calming breath. "Anakin! Stop that drooling!"
Anakin ignored the words and continued to drool at the red licorice.
"Of all the stupid things!" Obi-Wan started to dig in his pockets for coins. Finding some, he gruffly fed them into the machine and pressed the desired button. Picking the package up from the slot at the machine's bottom, he handed it to his apprentice. "Now act your age!"
"I'm sorry, Master." Anakin said as he happily tore open the package of red licorice. 'I don't know what came over me."
"Well, I wish I knew who gave you this blast disease! I'd strangle them!" Obi-Wan started down the hallway again, his apprentice alongside him. "We may have to examine every person you came in contact with on the last mission…"
"Even … Padme?" Anakin asked hopefully.
Obi-Wan groaned. "Didn't you get that out of your system yet?"
Anakin remained silent.
"For all we know she's the one that bit you!" Obi-Wan pointed out. "You can't trust politicians!"
Anakin happily chewed on his licorice, his mood brighter as he thought he might get to see Padme again.
The two returned to the exam room but the Doctor was nowhere in sight. Closing the door, Obi-Wan sat down to wait as he watched his charge chewing the candy. This vampire business was getting more ridiculous all the time! What was he going to do with the young man?
Finally the Doctor returned. "Well, there does seem to be some odd material in his blood. Perhaps vampires are real after all…"
"Yes, I know that!" Obi-Wan said. "But can you cure him?"
"I don't know yet. This is all very new and exciting!" The Doctor replied. "Think of the papers I can publish in the medical journals!"
"My Padawan is not a guinea pig! He's the Chosen One!"
"I suppose I could do some research, see if this problem exists on another world…."
"You do that!" Obi-Wan replied as he pulled Anakin out of the room. It was time to head back to their apartment.
To be continued…
