This time I got one word stuck in my head: car-r-r-r-r-r-r-gument.
The song is "Marian, the Librarian" from "The Music Man." The tune is really irregular and so is the rhyme scheme. You've just got to sing it. I know it's on YouTube, if you don't know it.
You can probably tell, but
the regular typeface is Danny, the bold face is Steve and the italics belong to me, the narrator.
By the way, the original song is pretty darn funny, too.

Cargument: A Duet

What can I do, you jerk,
To make this work?
I hate you badly, badly
Freakin' Neanderthal
That's not all…

Heaven help me,
If your lunacy is contagious
And I give up my tie for camo
And a missile addressed to occupant.
This is a cargument

What can I say, you cop,
To make you stop?
You keep on ranting, ranting
Crazy New Jerseyan.
And again…

When I'm wounded
And I'm shot in my whatchamacallit
I expect you to say I'm sorry
And to promise me no more accidents
These are the carguments

Now in Hawaii, he still wears neckties
In Hawaii.
And this fella would fuss by the hour
About backup and sunlight and sand
Tell me how much can a guy stand?

What can I do, dear lord!
Please hear one word,
I hate you badly, badly
Crazy commando guy
This is why…

It's a long lost cause, just do it because…
But the civilized world expects police to follow the laws…

As they're driving along they're setting a precedent
Having a cargument.
This is their cargument.