A/N - updated (2/12/17). Thanks to sonotawriter for betaing.
What's happened so far:
Ch5 - Avery and Mulciber's group is seething after most of the upperclassmen attended a party in honor of their defeat at the hands of the Orwells, and the three Slytherin girls eat with Lily to avoid issues. Jean gets her private lesson with McGonagall, and the twins have dinner with Hagrid (who gives them matching Owls: Twit and Twoo) and Dumbledore. Monday, the Orwells have their first Defense class, where they each show Professor Fawley their Patronus before joining the class in a duel. Jean turns Sirius' hair pink for a spell he used in their duel and gets attacked by Mulciber. Mulciber gets a broken nose and hit with a bat-boggy hex while Sirius decides to keep the hair after trying to remove it and finding it only triggers an explosion of pink glitter.
Ch6 - Peter is upset with the boys. They all go to Hogsmeade as a group, and later the Great hall rains goo, ceasing the girl's interaction with the boys until they try to apologize. Sirius is roped into helping Jean with her Animagus troubles before the boys decide a private party with some Truth or Dare is a good way to apologize. In the game Lily agrees to open presents from James, Trevor and Katie start dating, and Jean and Remus kiss. The next night, Jean finds Remus turning early and spends the full moon with him in the Forbidden Forest – much to the displeasure of the Centaurs.
Neville and the Do-Over
Chapter 7: Happy-ish Holidays
(Friday, December 19th, 1975.)
Trevor snatched the broom out of the dewy grass (it had liberated from under Sirius' bed, to fly out the dorm window). He turned to follow Hagrid up to the castle, propping the broom up onto his shoulder. The rising sun had peeked out from behind the castle. As it rose along the Astronomy Tower, it spread to light up the lawn toward them. Jogging to catch up with the long strides of a Half-Giant on a mission, Trevor found Hagrid cursing at the front doors.
"What's wrong?" Trevor asked, noticing a pile of ripped clothes at his feet as he nearly tripped over them.
"The bloody doors are locked." Hagrid answered. Bundling the clothes under his arm, Trevor drew his wand and joined Hagrid by the door.
"Damn it, Jean..." Trevor muttered, glancing at her slung in Hagrid's arm (as if she was nothing more than a sleeping baby).
"HA!" Came a victorious voice through the door, right before the doors opened themselves. Without pause Hagrid continued his way to the Hospital Wing, leaving a shocked James and Sirius behind without barely a look.
"What's wrong?" James asked after Hagrid. Trevor briefly noticed the fading black eye and split lip between the boys (passing over the fact that Sirius held his ribs with his left arm).
"They're both unconscious. Jean was shot with two arrows." Trevor said as he gestured for the two boys to start moving.
"Why is Remus unconscious?" James asked falling into step with Trevor.
"I don't know, it's not normal is it?" Trevor asked, and the two boys froze again, their eyes wide. "Oh come on you two!" He rolled his eyes and continued after Hagrid. Soon hearing James and Sirius running after him.
"You know?" James hissed.
"Even if I hadn't known, I think anybody would know now." Trevor sighed.
"You knew before?" Sirius hissed. "How?"
"We knew and we don't care. All I know is that she was protecting him from the Centaurs, after he had changed back and passed out. The Centaurs didn't like that and shot her, and then Hagrid made the Centaurs leave – that's all I know."
~.~.~
Jean woke up to find herself in a Hospital bed, and in loose striped Pj's. The side of her stomach and her thigh itched, but sweet relief was hindered by thick bandages under her fingers. 'Fucking Hell,' she growled to herself as tried to scratch through the bandage to no avail.
"Stop that." Hagrid's voice came softly from her right. His hand pulled her arm back and out to her side. He was sitting on the next bed with his elbows on his knees, looking like he had been waiting a bit.
"Madam Pomfrey! She's wake." She heard Trevor off to the left.
"It itches horribly," Jean grumbled, wishing he's just let her go so she could scratch the bandages away until she found relief.
"That's the poison on the arrowheads," Hagrid said calmly still holding her arm gently, "she'll bring you a potion that will take it away." Hagrid assured her.
"Miss Orwell," Madam Pomfrey arrived, "I would tell you how foolish you were to tangle with Centaurs, but I'm told you were protecting Mr. Lupin, so I suppose we will leave it at commendable."
"Thank you," She muttered, "how is he?" She sat up in the bed, readjusting her pillow.
"He'll be fine. Drink this and then in a few minutes, try to walk around the room a bit – if they open up or start to itch again we will have to give you another dose." Jean nodded her understanding and took the brown potion, closing her eyes and willing herself not to think about what it looked like. She downed the potion and handed the vial back to Madam Pomfrey who took it and quickly disappeared.
Looking around she saw a rounded lump in the bed across from her. At the other end of the room, right next to Madam Pomfrey's office, lay Remus still sleeping. In front of his bed stood, James, Sirius, and Trevor. Catching her eyes, Sirius started towards her, but Trevor grabbed his elbow and said something to stop him.
Her shoulders sagged and she smiled briefly. Pulling her knees up her chest, she dropped her forehead onto her knees. She swallowed hard and tried not to think. Failing, she scooped her wand off the bedside table and sadly waved it at her side, ending with a flick she put it back on the table beside her.
"Hagrid?" Jean said after a minute.
"Yes, dear?" He said in a fatherly way that made her want to smile.
"How can you look at me, like I'm not a horrible person?" She asked, the words coming out dry and rough.
"Don't you dare say that." He scolded.
"You were there, you saw what I did." She said, turning her head so that her cheek rested on her knee (to look at him). "I mauled him, Hagrid, and what's worse is I wanted to do so much more." Her arms chocked up her legs to hug her knees and hide her face, as she tried not to cry. "I wanted to kill them." She gasped in the levelest voice she could manage. "I ..." She heaved, " I wanted to … to rip them apart!"
"Come now." He patted her back with his hand.
"I hated them the moment they were there, and then after the first arrow – it was like I couldn't even think anymore! All I wanted was to make them pay. If you hadn't shown up..." She paused and shuddered. "I would have killed that Centaur I had pinned, and then I would have charged the leader." she paused again, looking up at him with pleading eyes. "Killing him if I could." She whispered, fresh tears pouring down her face. She stared into his eyes - waiting to see disgust or shame – maybe fear – but it never came. He took her hand (and her forearm) in his, and patted at her legs softly with the other hand.
"I understand Centaurs better than many." He started, after collecting his thoughts. "While they are not what some books would lead you to believe, they are not like humans. Yes they are people, and they should have more rights than they do – but they don't think like humans. If I hadn't of come, then the one thing that would have kept you alive, and Mr. Lupin alive, would be a physical attack on the leader. They respect physical power, it is how they choose their leaders, and it is how they settle disputes. If you had used your magic, even if was only to shield the two of you from their attacks – it would have enraged them far more than what you did."
"I don't know if that makes me feel better." She muttered morosely, as she tightened her hug on her legs.
"I had to fight one of their leaders - before they would accept me in the Forbidden Forest. I tried not to hurt him in any real way." Hagrid said, a grimace coming over his face. "I have always struggled to control my strength."
"What happened?"
"He was hurt, but would have recovered when the fight had ended." He paused and looked at his shoes. "Before they let me leave, they made me watch what they do to a leader who is weak."
"They killed him?" He nodded. "And they made you watch?"
"Like I said. Since then I've seen it tried again, but well the Leader wasn't as weak was they thought – so he killed the challenger. Either way, physical strength is a big thing for them." He tried to smile, and shrugged before continuing "I don't know much about Animagi," he blushed under his beard, "but I think your bear form let you have a taste of what a bear would know. Letting you read them enough to know that they were a threat and that the only way to deal with them was a physical attack." He Finished and continued to look at his shoes
"Oh, Hagrid!" She threw off the covers and wrapped her arms around his neck (standing on the balls of her feet and nearly hanging off of him). "I'm so happy we have you here," She whispered, "and I'm so sorry."
"Jean?" The voice came from a loud whisper behind her, she looked to see Trevor joining them with a wave of his wand.
"I best be going." Hagrid said, patting her arm gently for her to let him go. "You two visit soon." He said softly as he stood. "And no scratching." He added sternly, but couldn't help but smile.
"Of course, Hagrid." Trevor smiled at him, as he came to stand next to Jean. "Are you ready to see James and Sirius? They have nothing but questions." He whispered, putting his arm around her waist as if to steady her.
"Oh, I have some questions." Jean turned leaving Trevor behind her, to see the two black haired boys at the foot of the front bed. "You two!" She hissed, one hand on her hip and the other supplying the finger pointing at them. Turning to look at her, their eyes wide, the two freeze as if it decrease her ire. "Where the hell were you two!" Jean stomped her foot punctuating 'two', as she joined them. For a tiny moment, a sudden pain from her thigh took over her face but it vanished under her anger while she made a mental note to favor the other leg and crossed her arms tightly in front of her.
"Um..." They boys stammered and glanced at Remus asleep in the bed in front of them. Her eye's followed their gazes and her arms uncrossed – concern running over her face before it returned to outrage. 'They left him.' Pointing the two to the corner, she followed them as they obeyed.
Silently the three stood in the front corner of the ward, she felt for her wand but didn't find it. 'Of course, it's still on the bedside table,' she audibly groaned and looked back to the table where she had left it (really not wanting to walk all the way back for it). James offered his hesitantly, she took it cast a few spells for privacy (and so her yelling wouldn't wake Remus) before handing the wand back.
"Why, was Remus alone in a corridor! Why was he left to change alone!" She yelled – not really sounding like two questions. "WHERE THE BLOODY HELL WERE YOU TWO WHEN HE NEEDED YOU?" She yelled - it was an excellent impression of Molly Weasley.
"We left him to find Peter – it was still early." James managed, looking at his feet (Sirius looked like he could not decide if he was ashamed or outraged with her).
"Except he changed too soon!" She yelled, both hands on her hips, and her glare starting to fail her. "It wasn't even curfew when I found him starting to change." She clenched her jaw. "Do you even understand what would have happened if I hadn't dragged him outside? What could have happened to him? The people that could have been hurt?"
"How did you find him so quickly after?" James suddenly asked.
"She was with him mate - she's a bear." Sirius whispered to James.
"That's what you were doing with her?" James asked him, whipping around completely to face Sirius. The tone made her glare at Sirius – what exactly had he said they were doing?
"I didn't say, we did anything." Sirius told her, flashing his palms with a shrug.
"You certainly suggested you did." James' words made her advance on Sirius, feeling for her wand again, and turning her glare and a demanding hand to James, who shook his head with his wand firmly in his grasp behind his back.
"I just let them guess, why I was so beat after running off with you for that hour." Sirius justified with a hint of a grin. Jean only pursed her lips and frowned at him, her hands still on her hips. "Ok," he sighed at her, and turned to James, "She couldn't turn back. So I tried talking her through it like you did for me, but it didn't work so I turned and bugged her into playing with dog-me until we were both exhausted." He explained, and looked back at her exasperated, with a look that asked if she was happy now.
"Better." Jean said curtly with one last glare.
"We really need a name for your form, 'dog-me' sounds stupid." James muttered more to himself than anything.
"You can pick out nicknames and braid your hair later!" Jean snapped at James, suddenly the focus of her residual anger, making Sirius snicker.
"So why'd he change early?" James asked, rolling his eyes at Sirius and seemingly unaffected by Jean.
"I don't know," Jean sighed heavily feeling a little helpless, "but changing back didn't seem right either – although I hadn't seen that part before this morning." She added, slipping more and more into her head (pondering everything and planning just how she was going to figure it all out).
"Wait, you've seen the change before?" James nearly demanded, over Sirius' own objection.
"Wait, what now?" Sirius said at the same time as James.
"Once." She agreed, nodding softly (and their stares made her think of Luna talking about Blibbering Humdingers).
"And?" James demanded, breaking her from the thought.
"I was 13." Jean shrugged. "He tried to save us but forgot what night it was. Then the moon came out, and he turned - they were maybe a meter from him. So I made the call to save them – didn't really think past the saving them part to the being hunted down by a Werewolf part thou..."
"Woah now, back it up." James said gesturing with spinning fingers.
"You called – like made a werewolf call, to a werewolf and you lived?" Sirius added for James.
"Hippogriffs are easily offended." Jean answered obscurely, grinning as she watched them try to figure it out. "Anyway," she started again, "I think he must have been given something, but that means someone knows and they either want to hurt him or use him to hurt others." She frowned again and looked over her shoulder to him. "There is a potion I know of, that could help him, everyone else who knows about it is dead - besides Trevor." She corrected in an afterthought. "I cannot stress how complex it is, and very dangerous." Jean frowned, not sure if the risk was worth it. 'If only I had my old books, then at least I'd have a chance.'
"You're brilliant at potions." James countered.
"You don't understand." She shook her head, thinking of Snape making it for Remus. "It would be a challenge for a Potions Master. If it were known widely, it would be a potion used to test the skill of a Potions Master – something for them to brag over."
"Why don't you tell people about it? Than a Potions Master can make it. So many people would be helped."
"Yes, except the Ministry would come demanding answers. How does a 16 year know a potion to help Werewolves during the change when the Ministry has been working for years and has nothing to show? Then they'll demand to test it before it can be given out, which will take years. Meanwhile, they'll probably charge me for unlicensed dangerous experimentation - to save face." 'And because Damocles might already be working on it,' she added to herself.
"How do you know this potion?" James asked, his brow furrowed.
"A friend used it." Jean answered.
"You said 'he tried to save you'..." Sirius breathed, the full meaning of her words finally hitting him.
"Yes. He hid his condition as best he could. He took this potion for a week before the moon, but that night he missed his last dose in his rush. When taken properly, it let him keep his human mind. Even though he still turned he was in control."
"So of course, you two knew." James said.
"Yes." She agreed. 'Of course, we did,' she hummed to herself. "I learned about the potion from him, and tried to make it a couple times but I kept failing, and now there is no one who knows about it." 'And no book for me to work from, so I can check that it's safe. Why'd I have to lose my bag?'
"What would happen if he took it and it wasn't done right?" Sirius asked, straight to the point.
"It could very likely kill him." Jean said with a sigh. "I don't know what would be better: telling him of the potion or just having someone with him to keep the wolf in line – which was surprisingly easy."
"You are a bear, darling." Sirius grinned. "I'm sure it was incredibly easy." He added, and she narrowed her eyes at him, her lips pursed and her fingertips tapping on her hips. "It's brilliant Jeany! Can't you see that?" Sirius cut through.
"Don't tell Remus about this potion." James said before Jean could get sidetracked with Sirius (who quickly nodded his agreement).
"He will risk his life, and he doesn't need to - we won't let him down again." Sirius added, and it was Jean's turn to nod.
"You should come with us during the next moon." James said with a smile.
"Us now?" She smiled in return. "You've managed it now too, then?"
"Yeah," James almost blushed. "I'm a Stag." 'He has a black eye – how did I not notice?' "Oh yeah." He gingerly touched his half-healed eye, noticing her attention on it. "We went to find Peter so he could at least see Remus off, and when we were on our way back with Peter, we got into a little fight with some Slytherins."
"Seven Slytherins." Sirius corrected through a clenched jaw. "We were forced to run." He growled.
"Anyway, Peter is now over there." James pointed at the end of the row behind her. "Got a bad cutting curse – I remember getting Peter here and then waking up in a bed there." He pointed behind her again, but this time to the beds right behind her.
"I think she cursed us to sleep, to keep us from leaving." Sirius said quietly glaring across the wing at Madam Pomfrey.
"After we woke up, we then left to find Remus. Madam Pomfrey was furious." James continued. "We made sure he wasn't in the castle." He added, and they shared a look, that made her wonder if the Marauder's map was at least functioning enough to have helped them with that.
"Then we tried to get outside," Sirius added, "but some clever, little witch locked us in." He said pointedly with a smirk. "Once I finally broke the spell, the doors open up to Hagrid carrying you and Remus in – both unconscious."
"Guys!" Trevor's voice filtered through the spells surrounding them. "He's waking up." Jean held out her hand to James, but he didn't notice as he tried to leave her and Sirius – running into a barrier. Looking at her in confusion he saw her waiting hand.
"Ah..." James nodded, handing over his wand, watching her take down the spells silently before she handed back his wand.
"You're going to teach me those," Sirius smiled at her, "and that clever little lock of yours." He whispered, taking a place at her left. "I'm starting a list." He whispered in her ear.
"It's going to be even more awkward than yesterday morning, isn't it?" Jean looked at the two of them.
"It won't be that bad." James assured her, putting his arm around her to help her across the room (noting the spots of blood soaking thru her badges and staining her Pj's).
"You realize he's going to know that not only did I watch him change, but that I saw him after he changed back." She whispered, but James only looked confused, causing her to sigh a little more deeply than necessary and roll her eyes. "He has a birthmark on his ass." She hissed, throwing both boys into a fit of surprised giggles.
"Ok yeah, it's going to get really awkward." James managed.
"Why do Werewolf's have to remember everything?" She groaned. 'It would be so nice if we could just lie and say it was Trevor instead of me.'
They stood at the foot of his bed, James letting go of her and standing to her right. Remus was rubbing his eyes, and trying to sit up. 'Who knows? How did they get him to take whatever it is? Is he the target or the weapon?' She wondered. Sirius suddenly snatched her hand, pulling her from her thoughts, and she glared at him for the interruption.
"You were scratching." He hissed, and she relented. It was only then she realized how much her wounds itched again – how desperately she wanted to scratch them raw.
~.~.~
Madam Pomfrey had kept her only a little longer, to give her another dose of disgusting brown potion, and to change her bandages. After, the resident Healer finished with James and Sirius (between chewing them out and threatening to magically restrain them next time). Free to go, the four of them went down to breakfast, eating as much as they could with their ten remaining minutes.
"Where were you last night?" Lucinda asked Jean quietly, dropping down next her. Jean's eyes were wide (and her mouth full) she glanced at Sirius and James across from her. 'What the hell do I say?' "Bella's been talking to everyone about you being out all night." Lucinda continued. "We would have warned you, what a bloody gossip she is, and been able to cover for you if you'd told us." Lucinda added, with Katie agreeing with a hum as she sat by Trevor.
"Don't be nosy Lucinda." Sirius winked, followed with a playful head shake and "tisk-tisk." Which made Katie giggle happily.
"Good for you Jean." Lucinda whispered, and Jean did her best not to choke on her mouthful of eggs. 'Oh god, I'm going to have to let them think I spent the night with Sirius Black – Harry would just die at the very idea'. She resignedly thought to herself. Sirius seemed to notice her displeasure but only gave her a small shrug (failing to wipe the grin off his face). From the growing heat in her cheeks, she knew she was blushing and was sure it was only convincing the girls further. 'Damn it.'
"I'm ready for the Holiday." James declared, trying to change the subject. "Do we really have to go to classes today?" He continued, not caring how obvious his change in topic was, but from the groans of agreement around the table, he knew it had worked (Jean smiled at him, and continued eating). On the way to class, Jean was actually happy when conversation found its way to Quidditch.
~.~.~
[Two days later]
(Saturday, December 20th, 1975.)
In those 30 some hours that had been left before the holiday, the rumors of Jean and Sirius had already spread throughout the school. By the time everyone was leaving the castle, she couldn't go anywhere without whispers following her down the halls. It made, even more, issues with Snape and especially the other Mr. Black. She assumed Regulus would be going home for the holidays, and hoped that Sirius honored the dare he had been given.
Remus had stayed in the Hospital wing until Saturday. She had tried to visit him, but he had looked uncomfortable, so she only told Trevor to send her well-wishes for the rest of his stay. Jean and Trevor had seen off the others, leading to an awkward silence between Remus and Jean that infected the whole group (leading to the girls quickly breaking away from the boys). Lily talked to her from the opening of a door on the train (after the other girls broke free to find a compartment – not finding transfiguration theory terribly interesting). They carried on until the train starting pulling away and Lily had to yell out for Jean to Owl her so they could continue their conversation over break.
The castle was mostly empty. Trevor was the only 5th year in Gryffindor to stay while she and Snape were the only 5th year Slytherins. Thankfully Avery and the other Death Eaters (and wannabes) had all gone home for the holidays.
When the train pulled away from the station, Jean and Trevor took a carriage back up to the school and to the Carriage house where Hagrid was unhooking the Threstals from the carriages. He had water and feed for the Threstals in a shadowed pen as he moved the carriages back into storage.
"You can see them can't you?" Hagrid asked as he moved another toward the pen.
"Yes, I always have." Trevor answered first.
"I couldn't at first," Jean said, "which made riding one completely terrifying." She added, giving Trevor a look when he laughed.
"Misunderstood things." Hagrid sighed, as he gently pat one.
"Their Ministry rating is the perfect example for that, they shouldn't be listed as a four X animal. They aren't as naturally wild as Unicorns and Phoenixes, and they aren't as aggressive as Griffins or a Sphinx. I would be happy with a three X rating but I think they should be a two X like other Winged Horses."
"And that's just one thing wrong with the Magical Creatures Classification, that she could rant about." Trevor added, laughing when she slapped his arm.
Hagrid moved the last carriage shortly after, and the three headed back to his cabin after he opened the other side of the pen so that the Threstals could roam the grounds. After having lunch with Hagrid, they asked him to borrow a rooster (which he supplied).
On their way back up to the castle, they stopped by the Quidditch pitch and borrowed two school brooms. They stuffed the brooms into the expanded pockets in their bags, and after stunning the roster added it too. They made their way to Myrtle's bathroom, where they found Dumbledore (with Fawkes perched on his shoulder) waiting for them.
"Ah, good evening you two. The castle is so quiet now, isn't it? I find it rather relaxing." Dumbledore greeted them with a small smile.
"Good evening Professor." Jean and Trevor said together.
"You have the brooms and the rooster?" He asked.
"Yes, Professor." Jean confirmed gesturing to their bags. "You found a solution to our Parseltongue problem, then?"
"Indeed, it wasn't too hard to learn to say one word, it was more finding a source to learn from." Dumbledore said, nodding slightly with a small smile. "Are we ready?"
"Yes Professor, it's this sink here, with the snake on the faucet." She pointed.
~.~.~
A little over three hours later, and returning to the Slytherin common room, her robes were soaked and she was dying for a shower. The chamber itself while clean, the tunnels just off of the chamber were all disgusting. During her time in the chamber before, she had never had reason to run into one of the many tunnels or slosh around in the murky waters (to avoid a giant thrashing basilisk) and somehow when Harry told her of his running around for his life, he somehow didn't mention it was part of the school's sewer system (or that only the chamber was kept magically clean and free of sewer stink).
She stepped through the fake wall and into the common room hoping it would be empty, it was the middle of dinner after all, and few Slytherins were left in the castle. Her hopes were dashed quickly by a voice from beside the fireplace.
"I won't ask," Came the cold voice, "but I can smell you from here." He continued, his sneer audible.
"A pleasure, as always Severus." Jean answered tiredly as she continued on her way to her dorm, without pause. 'Greasy git – acting like I want to smell like this! Like I don't feel disgusting, or like I'm never going to be clean again.' Jean silently ranted.
She took a long shower, scrubbing herself nearly raw. After an hour, having just relaxed on her bed, a House Elf appeared, with a note from Dumbledore, and a tray of food. Without a word to her, the House Elf set the food on her bedside table, handed her the note, and grabbed her dirty robes off the floor before disappearing again.
"Thank you!" Jean rushed out the words, right before he disappeared - still shocked at his sudden appearance but not wanting him to vanish without her thanks.
The note explained that Dumbledore hadn't expected them to have to wash after their trip, and thus miss dinner (and his apologies). So he had sent some Elves to bring them dinner and take care of their robes, with clear instruction that the robes should be washed until free from all odor. The note also thanked them for helping to rid the school of such a threat and hoped they had a relaxing break from here on.
Jean sat on her bed cross-legged in her Pj's with her dinner in front of her and her planner in her lap. Ink floated near her knee with her quill stuck in it. Taking another bite from her plate, she flipped the planner open to Oct 31st, retrieved the quill and wrote a quick message on the page to Trevor.
'Clean yet? I think I may never stop smelling it.' She wrote
'If I scrubbed anymore I would be bleeding.' The words appeared under hers in his handwriting. 'I can smell it too, but it must just be from the smell being so strong.'
'I think so too.' Her reply triggered his words to seep into the page and disappear.
'Diadem in the morning? Now that we have plenty of fangs?'
'Yes, I don't like the idea of it being here in the castle. At the moment, it was the last one he created, and after Gringotts, it was the last one he checked – it was the one he was most confident no one would be able to find.'
'Why does it matter that it was the last he made?'
'I found a book in the restricted section – I only picked it up because I was looking for books not on the shelves in our time - I think it's the one Riddle used. It's a horrible book, but it says that murder splits your soul in half, if that is true then the last made Horcrux has a smaller part of his soul in it.' Jean wrote.
'I'm not sure I understand. We knew that to make a Horcrux one must split their soul first, which is done by murdering someone.' Trevor wrote back.
'Yes, but that could mean that the soul is slit 90-10 and the smaller part put into the Horcrux. If the soul is split in half, then the first Horcrux – the book – holds half of Riddles soul, while the other half remained in his body until it was split in half again when he made the Ring into a Horcrux.' Jean tried to explain.
'So what, you have some theory about his Horcruxes if that's true?' His word appeared. 'That the first one holds half of his soul, and the second holds a fourth?' Followed quickly, under the other line of words.
'Yes exactly.' She wrote be continuing. 'Riddle didn't know what we were doing until after Gringotts, and that was only because our exit was less than stealthy.' She paused to underline the last three words before she continued. 'Riddle only knew of the Diary's destruction because of Mr. Malfoy, and Riddle could have thought he didn't feel it because he didn't have a body at the time, but we know he didn't notice the Ring or Locket. Harry felt his rage and disbelief when Riddle realized why were at Gringotts. Harry felt him go to check each of the others. HIt's possible he might not have felt any of them, but if he could have felt it when some were destroyed but not when others were, then the question becomes what's the difference?' She finished with a flourish.
'You think it has to do with how much soul is in the Horcrux? Like how much of his soul is being killed at one time? Or is it how much soul has already been destroyed?'
'Both are possible.' She answered. 'If this book is right, about the soul being halved each time, then our Riddle was walking around with only 1/128th of his soul in his body. Where this Riddle would have 1/32 of a soul in his chest.'
'He made that many?'
'The book would have ½, the ring ¼, the Cup 1/8, the Locket 1/16, and the diadem 1/32. Harry would have had 1/64 while the snake had 1/128 like Riddle himself.'
'I'm sorry I don't get what this means for us. We don't need to destroy them in some order right?'
'No we can destroy them in whatever order we get to them, but there is the possibility that if we destroy the dairy that Riddle will feel the loss of half his soul. Or that he may start to feel their destruction by the end. The good news is that we know that before he didn't notice having 7/8ths of his soul dead, and he didn't feel having ¼ of his soul killed at one time.'
'So we should stop destroying them after the first few?'
'Actually, we should be fine as long as we do the book last. One because we don't know if with a body he will feel it, and two because if we destroy all the others that would still be less than half of his soul dead – 15/32 to be exact. Easiest plan would be to destroy the Diadem and Ring, steal the Book and keep it safe until the Locket is placed in the cave. Then break into Gringotts before visiting the Cave and destroy the three at once just before killing him – but then things never work out the easy way.'
'You couldn't have just said 'hey, just a notice but we should destroy book last just to be safe?' Would that have been so hard?' He teased. 'How are the bracelets coming?' He added, not really wanting an answer to his first question.
'I have two ways to do it. One would be easier but only give generic results – like getting hot when the other is in pain and getting cold when the other is angry or afraid.' Jean answered.
'So it would trigger for stubbing my toe as well as getting in a fight, with no real way to know which.'
'Right. The other way would be harder but could be much more exact. Then again it's detail could be a problem itself – it would basically cause a very weak physical and psychic link. We would be aware of any strong emotion or feeling, and I don't know how I could control it enough for that not to get way too personal.'
'I think I get what you're saying: with that, if I were to be excited about kissing Katie, you would feel excited too?'
'Not quite. I would feel you being excited. I would feel it in a way, but it would feel foreign. I would know it wasn't my own feeling. I don't see a way to make that option not creepy – no two people should be that connected - there would be nearly no privacy.'
'Yeah, I like the first option, even if it gives us false positives.'
'My thinking exactly. I'll have them done soon, then. They will get hot for pain, and they will get cold for negative emotions like fear and anger, the only thing is that pain could trigger either. Also, they will tighten if there is actual physical harm, that is in need of healing. The tighter the bracelet the more critical the injuries are.'
'Can they do all three at once?' Trevor asked.
'Yes. Only one-half of the bracelet will heat while the other cools, so they can both occur at the same time. Spell wise they are two separate bracelets.'
'Got it. Hot is pain, cold is distress, and tight means injury.'
'I'm ready for bed, but think about finishing up Christmas shopping. Tomorrow with Hagrid will be our last chance to get anything we forgot.' Jean reminded him.
'Night Jean, and don't stress about Christmas. Gifts don't have to be perfect.'
'Night Trevor.'
~.~.~
[two days later]
(Monday, December 22nd, 1975.)
The first Monday of the break, Jean and Trevor sat together in the Room of Requirement, pulling their presents together for everyone. Trevor sat working through a pile of candy and other little things, dividing them up and wrapping them in blue paper with spinning snowflakes. Jean sat cross-legged in her chair with a small stack of wrapped presents to her right, and little coin purses scattered around her lap with more to her left.
"What are you doing with those?" Trevor asked, coming out of a stretch and laying out on the couch that faced her.
"Little personalized Expanded bags, with a charm so they aren't heavy. I even have a normal sized pocket that it opens to by default. I had a beaded bag that we carried everything in, for all of last year, but I most have lost it in the battle." She sighed. "So I was going to make myself a new one to go around my neck, and one for you, and then I figured they might make good presents and make life easier for the owls." She smiled.
"You don't think we've got everyone enough?" He chuckled gesturing at the two piles he had left on the floor and the pile beside her.
"It's mostly candy, Zonko's products, and a few quills or books." She shrugged, with a little frown.
"Alright, Jean." He gave in, with a smile to himself as he went back to stretching out his stiff back.
"We should be able to get everything ready by lunch after we can go to the Owlery, that way everyone will get their gifts in time."
"Sounds like a plan." He laughed softly, watching her (wand in one hand and a bag with LE stamped into the leather in the other).
~.~.~
[two days later]
(Thursday, December 24th, 1975.)
They had agreed to spend Christmas eve night in the Room of Requirement together. It was a small room, with a giant tree and a roaring fireplace. A loveseat made a triangle with the fireplace and the tree, and along the walls were three doors, giving them each a bedroom and a shared bathroom.
"It's perfect, it's like a tiny common room just for us." Jean beamed at the room.
"I asked for the owls and House Elves to be able to find us, so our presents should come just like usual." Trevor said.
"That explains the window with the perch beside it." She smiled.
"I love this room." Trevor smiled, awe clear in his voice. "Do you think they made it on purpose, or that it just manifested from all the magic?"
"I don't know before Harry found it, the Come and Go Room was just a Legend I had read about – it was briefly mentioned in 'Hogwarts: A History'. I found it mentioned a few other times, but it was only slightly more believed in than the Chamber of Secrets, but then that's real too." She sighed.
"Well, I'm going to make a run to the kitchens." Trevor decided, pulling his cloak from his bag. "I'll be back in a bit." He smiled, before pulling the cloak over himself and disappearing.
She curled up on the side of the loveseat closest to the fire and let the heat wash over her. It felt like they had finally done something, the Basilisk was dead – no one would be petrified (or killed). The Diadem was destroyed and sitting in her book bag in a small chest filled with Basilisk fangs.
"JEAN!" The door banged on the wall.
"What?" She snapped around in her seat, wand in hand, to see Trevor running to her.
"Wemsi!"
"What?"
"Wemsi!" He looked over his shoulder and gestured at the sobbing House Elf clutching a beaded bag. "Wemsi is the Elf who helped me before we left!"
"Trevor!" She scolded, her eyes threatening to bug right out of her head.
"No, no." He waved her down, still excited. "This is our Wemsi. You didn't lose your bag in the battle, you dropped the bag when you grabbed me – it fell out of your sock apparently." He pointed to the bag in the Elf's hands, "Wemsi picked it up and grabbed you to try to get your attention, but then the wind started. She held on for as long as she could, but lost hold, and got here yesterday." He said, guiding the Elf around the back of the loveseat.
"Hello, Wemsi. I know you're probably really confused, and miss your friends – we miss people too." She tried to comfort the depressed looking Elf.
"Wemsi not confused. Other Elves tell Wemsi, don't let Wemsi work!" She balled. "Wemsi is unbound!" She wailed.
"It's alright Wemsi, we want to help. Come sit down." Trevor took the Elf's hand and helped her climb up into the cushion next to Jean. "Now I'm sorry, but can you tell us again why you're upset?" He asked kneeling next to the loveseat.
"Wemsi is unbound. Wemsi was bound to serve Hogwarts. Now Wemsi has no Master, no work, no purpose." She cried.
"You're free then!" Jean smiled until Wemsi glared at her.
"Wemsi is being free to being alone... useless..." Jean started to open her mouth but was stopped by Trevor.
"Now is not the time for S.P.E.W., and trying to convince her that she should be happy being free."
"Wemsi no want be free. Wemsi want to work. Wemsi want to matter." The Elf howled.
"Alright, Wemsi." Trevor smiled, patting her hand. "We will help you if you want to be bound again, then we help you do that."
"You be Wemsi's Master! Brave, kind Master!" The Elf looked hopeful.
"I don't know about that Wemsi... you see, I don't really have enough work for a House Elf. I live here at the castle."
"Wemsi could work at Hogwarts, for brave Master." She insisted.
"Wemsi, why don't we take you to the Headmaster so you can be bound to Hogwarts again if that's what you really want." Jean said sighing slightly to herself.
"Wemsi can't! Little Wemsi is!"
"Oh, I see." Jean hummed, trying to think of something else.
"Wemsi would serve Silly Mistress! Wemsi would listen to Mistress talk about free Elf's, Wemsi never say how sad it makes Wemsi." The Elf looked hopefully at her.
"We are responsible for her Jean, it's my fault she's back here with us." Trevor said.
"I don't know what to say, Trevor, I can see how much she wants it, but it still feels like slavery!"
"I'm sorry, Jean. Don't hate me, but you're wrong – House Elves should be able to choose to be bound or free, and I think she's pretty clear on which she wants." Trevor added sadly, before turning to Wemsi. "I will bind myself to you Wemsi, but I have conditions."
"Anything! Brave Master!"
"First, you would never harm yourself, or allow others to harm you." Wemsi nodded her acceptance. "One day each week, you would not do any work, instead, you would only do things for your own enjoyment. Meaning also that you must learn to enjoy things, that are not work – like reading or learning new skills or taking walks in nature."
"Wemsi would even do that sir!"
"Lastly, you would have to accept that I would often tell you that you can do different things, and will expect you to choose which (if any) you want to do. Do you understand my conditions Wemsi?"
"Yes. Bind Wemsi! Bind Wemsi!" The Elf started bouncing on the cushion.
"Alright." He offered his hand to the Elf. "My name is Neville Longbottom, of the House Longbottom, one of the sacred Twenty-Eight." As he spoke, Wemsi took his hand, and cut his palm, holding her own hand under his so that his blood dripped down onto her. "I bind you Wemsi to myself." He added, grimacing slightly at the idea by the end. As his blood hit her, it disappeared, drop after drop until the 7th drop hit her open hand and exploded as a brilliant blue light. With that, the Elf squealed and launched herself to hang around his neck.
"Are you happy Wemsi?" He asked her gently, making no attempt to remove her from him.
"Yes, Master."
"Would you please, not call me Master?" He asked, trying not to groan the words.
"Wemsi will try...sir?"
"Thank you Wemsi." He said taking what he could get. Wemsi crawled back onto the seat and seeing his hand, she jerked as if she had forgotten and quickly placed her hand over the cut, healing his hand in a flash. "Thanks again." He smiled and risked a look a Jean. "Are you mad?" He grimaced.
"How can I be, when she is so happy and I know what good care she'll have with you?" She said in a voice that really didn't sound pleased but also didn't sound angry (maybe annoyed or tired).
"Now Wemsi," He turned back to her, "I have some orders for you." The Elf nodded excitedly. "You are never to tell anyone that you or I, or her," He pointed at Jean, "are from the future."
"Yes, Mas- sir." Wemsi corrected quickly.
"You will never tell anyone but us about future events." He said, pointing again. "You will never tell my true name, or Hermione's. You will say my name is Trevor Neville Orwell, and that her name is Jean Hermione Orwell." He pointed again to her. " You will say we are twins, and that Jean is older by a few minutes. Like my true name, you will not tell my true age or when I was born. You will say that I am 16 years old, born on September the 30th of 1959, and of course the same for Jean. Do you understand?"
"Yes. Sir is Trevor Orwell. Miss is Jean Orwell. Yous are twins, born on September 30th, 1959, and are being 16." Wemsi repeated.
"Good Wemsi. I also order you to hold to our agreement. You will not harm yourself, nor let someone harm you. You will pick one day of the week to not work on, and I ask that you do your best to enjoy it."
"Yes, sir. Wemsi will try sir."
"Did I miss anything Jean?" He turned slightly from Wemsi to look at Jean as he spoke.
"Hagrid, and our background story." She answered after a brief pause.
"Right. You will say that Jean and I's parents are dead. Say that our mother was a Pureblood witch and our father was a Muggle. You will say that our godfather is Rubeus Hagrid (a childhood friend of our mother). You will obey Jean as you would I. Oh," He seemed to remember something. "I order you to come when I or Jean call you." He turned to Jean. "That way she can come regardless of any spell." She nodded thinking about Dobby at Malfoy Manor, then her thoughts turned to poor Kreacher.
"You should add one, but I'm not sure how to phrase it – Kreacher was told by Regulus to do as Voldemort said but also told him to come home when he was done. It was the only reason he was able to leave the cave, and why he lived." She finished, and Trevor nodded as he thought how to word an order to let her save herself when trapped.
"Alright Wemsi, one last order." He said pausing briefly to get the words right. "If you are ever in danger or hurt or afraid, and Jean or I aren't there or if we are not able to tell you what to do, then you are to go somewhere safe or go for help."
"I think that covers everything." Jean said.
"Wemsi, me and Jean are going to stay here for the night. You can stay with us, or you can find work with the other House Elves in Hogwarts, or you can choose Wednesday as your day off. Whatever you choose to do today, you need to pick your day off." Trevor said.
"Tuesdays, Wemsi not work."
"Good. Now, will you be able to work, eat, and sleep with the other House Elves?"
"Yes, Wemsi is bound."
"Good." He nodded and noticed the Hogwarts crest on her pillow case dress. "You need to wear something different, and I can't give you clothes." He finished as if was a riddle.
"Wemsi will change it to whatever sir is wanting."
"Just something nondescript, that's nice and will keep you comfortable." He smiled.
"Do you have a favorite color Wemsi? You could make it any color you like or even continue to change it." Jean smiled. Wemsi nodded and snapped her fingers and in a puff of smoke, she was dressed in a silk, purple pillow case with blue trim, with matching slippers.
"Very nice Wemsi." The two said together, smiling.
"Wemsi finds work now." She declared, pushing off the couch and landing on her feet. She handed the beaded bag to Trevor. "If Wemsi not serve sir or miss?" She added hopefully.
"You could send us up some food, and hot chocolate. Maybe some food and water for our owls, should they show up." Trevor offered and Wemsi nodded excitedly and vanished.
Moments later, a small table appeared in front of the loveseat with sandwiches, cookies, candy, hot chocolate, and butter beer. By the windowed appeared water and food in front of each perch. Looking at it all they couldn't help but laugh.
"Are you really not mad?" Trevor asked, sitting next to her on the loveseat.
"No Trevor, I'm not mad. Hagrid said something last week that makes me think, maybe you're right, maybe I don't understand House Elves. I want them to free and happy about being free, but maybe it's wrong of me (to want them to be like Dobby). So, if they choose to bond and they are treated well and that makes them happy, then I guess I have to be happy with that."
"I'm not going to tell you that all Elves want to work all the time and that they will get upset if you try to pay them. But, most are like that, and their happiness is usually to do with having enough work and being appreciated. Gran said that is how you were supposed to pay House Elves. That was how it was before they were bound to wizards, she said."
"Like the shoemaker?" Jean asked after a moment's thought.
"What?"
"It's a fairy tale for Muggles. There was a poor shoemaker and his wife, and one night he goes to bed without finishing his work and leaving his porridge and cream untouched. He wakes to find the porridge and cream gone, and all the shoes he had supplies to make were made. The next night he leaves his shop the same way, but with much more supplies and he hides and watches. He finds these little Elves were coming into his shop at night and made all the shoes he had supplies for, and that they eat the porridge and drank the cream he left out. Every night the Elves came. That's where the stories start to change. In most they were naked, so the wife knitted them clothes to thank them for all their help. Another was that they become rich selling the shoes and tried to give the Elves some of the money. In one, he stops putting out the porridge and cream, and in another, they catch him watching them. Anyways, they all end with the Elves leaving. Sometimes because they are angry, and sometimes because they were sent there by a good deed, and payment canceled that."
"That sounds along the right line." He nodded, relaxing back into the loveseat. They sat there together in silence, enjoying the fire.
"Oh my god!" She bolted upright and turned to Trevor.
"What?" He asked alarmed.
"My bag!" She snatched the beaded bag from the table (where Trevor had dropped it). Her arm disappearing inside, for a while before she pulled out a book on Potions. "This!" She held it triumphantly.
"We already have books for Potions."
"This!" She tapped the cover the with her finger as she pointed to it. "Has the Wolfsbane Potion in it. With it, I can work on making it. I took this book because of its excellent instructions for difficult potions (like Wolfsbane, Felix Felicis, and Veritaserum) and its variety of advanced healing potions. It has a whole chapter on how to check each potion, for both potency and safety! With this and some work, I'll be able to safely make the Wolfsbane potion."
"That will be great for Remus, he won't look so horrible around the moon either. Good thing we found Wemsi I guess."
"...Wemsi..." Jean paused looking dumbstruck. "Trevor it's Christmas eve!"
"Yes..."
"We don't have a gift for Wemsi!" She paused briefly, looking distressed. "What about one of those bags?"
"Aren't all the bags gone?"
"No I made one for myself, and one for you. I can give her the one I made for myself, I don't need it anyway, it was to replace this bag." She shook the breaded bag in the air, causing a distant rumbling sound.
"She'll love that, and it will mean she can keep all her things on her. Which at the moment, will be that bag and whatever I find to give her. All I can think of is sweets."
"You can't give her clothes... probably want to skip books because I don't think many House Elves can read... you could give her a sewing kit or a knitting set but that could be insulting..." Jean trailed off.
"I think I'll stick with sweets this year. I get her something better next year when I know what I can give her without making her angry, or burst into tears."
~.~.~
[A week and a half later]
(Sunday, January 4th, 1976.)
"Do you think everyone liked their presents?" She asked Trevor, as she tried not to fidget as they waited for the train to pull into Hogsmeade station.
"I think the little bags you made might have outshone what was in them." He laughed.
"They're useful, and I felt bad for Twitt and Twoo." She said, defensive at his laughter.
"I still can't believe Hagrid named them that." Trevor said, his light laugh turning into a giggle.
"You mean like naming a Cerberus Fluffy?" Jean asked, rolling her eyes over to look at him (now snickering).
"Alright, I can believe it." He conceded.
"Oh look!" Jean interjected, slapping his arm absently with the back of her hand as she pointed the furthest patch of track they could see. "The train's here."
"Finally, it's freezing out here."
"Do you think he's still upset?" Jean turned to him, her joy from a moment ago replaced with concern again.
"I'm sure it will at least be better than when he left." Trevor assured her, putting his arm around her shoulders. The train pulled into the station, and they watched as students flooded out. The two stood at the back of the platform together, looking for their friends. After a few moments of not seeing anyone, he felt her shoulders start to tense. "I'm sure they are just waiting on the train for the crowd to thin out." He whispered.
~.~.~
A week since Christmas break ended, and Remus was still avoiding her. Sirius was around a lot, apparently, Remus wasn't happy with him either (Jean guessed he blamed Sirius for his dare which lead to their kiss but sure wasn't why he would be taking it this badly). When Remus wasn't off alone or with Peter, Sirius would find her and get her to ditch the girls (who had been sweet but didn't know what to say or do – either ignoring the issue or dissecting what they named 'the great prat awakening').
Sometimes Trevor came with Sirius, but she had asked him to try to be there for Remus and for James who's suffering was clear any time his friends bickered or more commonly ignored each other. Even Lily seemed to notice James' discomfort and was making small attempts to make him feel better (sitting near him and casually involving him in conversation – even going so far as to smile at him sometimes).
Sirius would throw his arm around her shoulders and whisper jokes and snarky comments in her ear. He would get her to duel with him, or just play in the Room of Requirement, and even pulled her into a couple of pranks. He had dared her to convince Peeves to bother Avery all day (who lost it after enduring almost a full day of the poltergeist's jabs and was given a week of detention for his outburst).
She had lost her respect for authority in the war – starting with Umbridge and sealed with Death Eaters controlling the Ministry. Without it, and with some help from Sirius, she discovered she liked mischief (as long as no one could get hurt, that is). While he wanted to jinx people, she wanted to make it so that the portraits spoke only in double entendres without ever realizing. While Sirius wanted to use permanent-sticking charms on the benches in the Great Hall, She wanted to transfigure all the rolls into songbirds. He objected to that idea by asking about their droppings, which sparked a forced two hour review of their classes, because he should know that like conjured animals, animals transfigured from the inanimate were not truly alive and could not eat and thus did not have waste (just as they did not age, die, or reproduce).
While Sirius was helping distract her from the issues of her and Remus and she was thankful for him after awhile his company was just exhausting. Keeping up with him (being just as mischievous and flirty as he was) was exhausting, and then there was the effort of keeping him from doing something stupid (like the permanent sticking charms on the benches in the Great Hall). So, Jean was pre-emptively ditching him, to going to Library and curl up surrounded by books and read her heart out.
"Well," Severus sneered as she tried to silently pass their table, "if it isn't the Whore of Slytherin." Beside him, Reggie smirked.
"Yes, Severus?" She paused in front of them with a sweet smile stuck on her face. "I've been meaning to ask, do you prefer your blood from babies or just virgins?" She said sweetly and kept her smile while she watched his face morph into a scowl.
A laugh escaped Reggie, earning him the full attention of both Slytherins. "And you, do you hate your brother because he's a proud blood-traitor or do you hate him because he left and you're too weak to follow him?" She asked as if inquiring to his desired profession after school, leaving both boys scowling at her. "Well," She smiled again, "I really should let you get back to work, you two seem to need all the study time you can get, with those grades you've been getting lately." She added with the faintest smirk.
Continuing on her way, leaving two scowling Slytherins in her wake, she smirked to herself. Maybe Sirius was rubbing off on her. Maybe she was coming to the end of her rope due to Remus. Maybe it wasn't the smartest thing to do in the long run, but damn did it feel good.
First, it had been the silent treatment from her house, then after break, it was all the 'Whore of Slytherin' comments coming from everyone in green lined robes (except Katie and Lucinda who stood by her - hexing anyone dumb enough to give even an unflattering in their presence). Mulciber seemed to be driving it all, 'probably spent all Holiday coming up with the title and is just proud of his cleverness.'
~.~.~
[One week later]
(Sunday, January 11th, 1976.)
"I'm bored!" Sirius whined, rolling into his side in the tall grass to face her. Winking when she turned to look at him.
"We're not going to make out." She answered.
"Was it really that bad?" He asked quietly after a minute or so.
"Was what?" She asked, giving him a confused look.
"The kiss." He sighed. "The peppermint kiss." He clarified in the next breath.
"Come on Sirius, you know -"
"Yeah I know why you started crying then, and I know why you didn't kiss me for the dare, but since then..."
"The kiss was great." She assured him.
"Then why not?" He objected. "I've changed my toothpaste!" He added, and she tried not to giggle.
"It's just, despite your obvious good looks and your skill in that area it's not all that tempting." She looked at him to see if he understood, but he only stared at her looking confused. "There's just no …" She tried to find a word that fit the feeling, "fire." She said testing out the closest word she could think of to explain what was lacking when they kissed.
"Are you saying it was like kissing your brother?"
"Eww, no!"
"Thank god." He sighed, clearly relieved.
"Here..." She sighed, not knowing how else to explain. She grabbed his tie, and pulled him into her, kissing him. Letting him kiss her. Letting him run his hand down her side. After a minute or two, she gently pushed him back. "See?"
"No." He breathed shaking his head.
"It's nice and it's fun, but where are the fireworks? That pull?" She tried again.
"You-" He looked at her, stopping, "no..." He shook his head, trying not to laugh.
"What?"
"Jeany, how many boyfriends have you had?"
"...just Ron – if you can really count that as it didn't even make it 24 hours..."
"How many guys have you been with?"
"Weren't you paying attention during Truth or Dare? Remus asked me that after you booed his 'how many relationships' question." Jean lectured.
"No, he asked how many guys you've kissed." Sirius corrected.
"Yeah, you make four – well five now..." She added with a small groan for her current situation.
"Oh, Jeany." He started laughing.
"What?"
"I get it now." He nodded at her, smiling wide. "You think that's how it is – fireworks!" He giggled, despite himself.
"Shut it!" She glared at him, pushing him back into the grass and onto his back.
"That's so cute." He smiled.
"I will hex you." She growled.
"Alright!" He showed her his palms. "I'll drop it, but if you ever stop waiting for fireworks." He winked at her.
"...have you never?" She asked quietly, after a moment. He smiled almost sadly (miss understanding why she asked), and kissed her forehead.
"I don't think most people do, especially not their first time."
"Let's talk about something different."
"Sure, Jeany." He laid back in the tall grass, with his hands under his head. "How about a prank?"
"No."
"Come on, it will be fun. We could make the portraits yell obscenities." He offered, as she stared up at the blue sky, and sounds of splashing and laughter came up from the lake.
"I have a better idea." She smiled, rolling to her side to face him again. He did the same and met her with an excited smirk. "Do you think anyone can see us here?"
"Not a chance." He said after looking around, wondering if she'd changed her mind on the snogging.
"Good." She pulled her wand from her pocket and tapped the top of his head with it. "Follow my lead." She whispered, smiling as he disappeared.
"Gladly." She would have sworn he winked when he said it. She felt a wand tap her head and watched herself disappear.
"I'm impressed Sirius, that's a perfect Disillusionment Charm." She said trying to look at herself.
"I've been practicing since you showed me last." He whispered, his voice close.
"You know most people can't do a perfect Disillusionment Charm."
"Remus can, and you can." He dismissed. If anyone could see him, they would have seen him shrugging off the compliment.
Looking around, Jean saw three students splashing in the Black Lake, and students all around them sitting in the grass or on blankets (talking quietly or reading). Pointing her wand at the closest group (one by one) she silently transfigured their school robes into swimwear. When two more nearby students appeared in a similar state, she knew Sirius had caught on.
Turning to the tree by the lake, she pointed her wand at it with a smile. It grew and morphed, until it was a slide, with a winding ladder up to the top. Gasps of confusion and awe mixed with giggling over the lawn.
"I think some music is in order." Sirius whispered in her ear, right before she watched a rock in front of her turn into a Wizarding Wireless radio that started playing a wizard rock song. As the radio raised into the air to float around the lake, people started rushing past. Jean and Sirius bumped into each other, as they dodged their laughing classmates, having to hold onto each other to keep from falling and being trampled. "Come on." He whispered again, pulling her through the oncoming students, and off to the side where a large stone sat near the lake. She heard him blindly crawl up the rock to sit on the top. Once on top, he said he'd pull her up, but he didn't quite realize how hard it was to find an invisible person (even when you were just right next to them and they hadn't moved). So for a few seconds, they both blindly waved one arm in the general direction of the other, until finally Jean found his calf and he pulled her up to sit beside him.
They sat, invisible on the rock, watching the crowd of students swim and splash around in the water. There were was a mass of student close to the Lake Transfiguring their robes (and some younger classmen awkwardly asking them to change theirs too). The lake was filled, and a line was forming for the slide. Pointing her wand again at the tree, turned slide, she grew a second ladder leading to a diving board (over the much avoided deep spot by the shore). She heard Sirius quietly laughing next to her, and felt him drape his arm around her shoulders.
"You are brilliant." He whispered with a laugh.
"What is this?" Professor Flitwick demanded from halfway down the lawn to the lake.
"Time to go." Sirius hissed, grabbing her hand and pulling her down the back of the rock. He pulled her into the edge of the Forbidden Forest. "Follow my lead." He hissed, chuckling as he pulled her another few feet into the woods. He appeared and quickly tapped her with his wand. "Keep up." He smirked, before falling to his knees into a big shaggy dog.
With a roll of her neck, she let her body shift and lowered herself onto all fours, chasing after him in a burst of speed she would never have in her own body. He kept close to the edge of the forest but deep enough that no one would be able to see a black dog and a brown bear. They ran until they were near the Quidditch Pitch. Coming to the edge of the wood, and looking side to side, Sirius turned back to himself and motioned for her to join him.
They walked slowly, catching their breath, meandering over to the pitch. Some students had started a Quaffle-only game, and others were just flying around the outside the pitch, doing loops and tricks on their brooms, or racing each other.
"It's a beautiful day for flying." Sirius smiled.
"I don't fly if I can help it." Jean murmured.
"We'll have to change that." He grinned.
"Not happening." She said firmly.
"Not today." He shrugged.
~.~.~
[nearly a week later]
(Friday, January 16th, 1976.)
"That's enough! Two weeks of this bullshit." Jean growled, snatching Remus' wrist with her left hand and pulling hard, but he did not budge. 'What's her problem?' He thought bitterly. "So help me." She turned back to him, her eyes blazing, and her wand pointing at him. "You start walking or I will turn you into a matchbook." 'Fine,' he mentally grumbled to himself as he begrudgingly followed her. "In." She pointed to an empty classroom, and he obeyed but made it clear he was unhappy about it.
He leaned against a desk near the wall opposite the door and watched her waving her wand over the door. He crossed his arms, trying to put the thought of how good she smelled out of his head. 'Got a whiff of Sirius when you walked past too – he's had his arm around her shoulders all day. He's been running off with her all the time – couldn't leave this one girl alone.' He shook his head, shaking the thoughts away.
"What is it, Jean?" He snapped.
"What did I do? Is it the kiss or the other thing?" 'Both,' he thought bitterly but said nothing. "Fine! I'm sorry I kissed you! I should have just sucked it up and kissed Sirius..." She paused. 'It's not like you weren't kissing him the next night.' "Or endured kissing James." She sighed. "I get you're upset. I don't know if you're pissed, or embarrassed – because you won't fucking talk to me – you won't even look at me half the time!"
"Are you done?"
"No, I'm not bloody done! It's been a month, and you're … like this!" She gestured at him. "I knew it would be awkward between us after, but come on!" 'You did kiss me, and then got with my friend the next day,' he thought as he glared at her. "What was that?" She pointed from one eye to the other. "What did I do to make you so pissed at me? Was it really the kiss? I thought you would understand!" 'Understand you using me to make Sirius jealous?' He internally scoffed. "Fine Remus! I thought we were friends, I thought we could get past this! But I'm just stupid! I see that now, of course, we weren't friends!" She looked defeated. "I don't know why you hate me so much," She whispered. His chest constricted at the words. 'No, don't feel bad.' "I'll keep away. I won't bother you anymore." Her eyes were red and glossy with forming tears. "I am sorry... know, I won't tell anyone..." She turned to the door and waved her wand. "Tell Sirius and James, that I won't be coming out for this moon," she paused and sighed, "or any others." 'Wait, what?' He wind whirled, and he pushed himself from the desk, looking around slightly like he would see something that would make him understand. She reached for the door handle, and he saw her brush her face with her palm.
"Wait." He grabbed her wrist. "OW!" He jerked his hand back, shaking the sting away.
"Humph." She gave him a self-righteous look and turned back to the door. 'Do something!' He reached over her (using the 9 inches he had on her), and pressed the door firmly shut with his left hand. "Don't make me hurt you, Remus." She said clearly, her voice slow and annoyed.
"Wait." He implored.
"Now, you want to talk?" She turned to him, glaring up at him.
"What did you mean?" He asked quietly.
"Don't play dumb, Remus." She sighed again, moving away from him and into the room, with her back to him. He leaned against the door and watched her.
"...I'm not..." She turned to face him, her arms crossed, and her foot tapping.
"I didn't take you as one to play games like this – but then I didn't think you'd hate me over a kiss and a little nudity." 'So it wasn't just snogging,' he thought. "What now Remus?" She glared at him, catching the look that had flashed over his face.
"Just you and Sirius." He shook his head.
"What about me and Sirius?" She yelled, and waved her wand at the door again (sure she was about to start yelling). He scoffed and took a step forward.
"Come on, the whole school is talking about it."
"REMUS LUPIN! HOW DARE YOU!" She advanced on him, glaring up at him (hands on her hips). "You have no right to look at me like that." She pointed her finger at him and pressed it into his chest. "Even if I had relations with Sirius. HELL - even if you watched me shag half the damn school, you still wouldn't have the right to look at me like that! IT'S BAD ENOUGH THE WHOLE SCHOOL, THINKS I'M THE LATEST NOTCH ON SIRIUS' BED POST, AND YOU DARE SUGGEST IT'S TRUE WHEN YOU KNOW DAMN WELL THAT I WAS WITH YOU THAT NIGHT!" She hollered. "STOP ACTING LIKE A CHILD! You should be thankful I was the one who found you in the hall that night. You should be thankful I kept the centaurs at bay. SO WHAT IF I SAW YOU NAKED! MOST OF THE TIME I WAS A BEAR AND DIDN'T REALLY NOTICE. YES, THAT LAST LOOK AS MYSELF, WAS A LITTLE EMBRASSING, BUT COME ON!" She shrieked at him, as he stared blankly ahead (looking through her). He started to open his mouth, but she stopped him. "I don't know when you decided to become such an arse, but if you decide to go back to the old Remus – let me know." Her voice was quite, and yet far more unnerving than the yelling had been.
Finishing her rant, she turned on her heel, waved her wand at the door and made her way to the door handle. 'Stop her!' He tried to intercept her but felt his whole body snap together before he could take a second step. He fell to his side, unable to move, and watched her walk out the door, and slam the door behind her. He heard the door click and saw a sheen flash over the door. 'Great, she locked me in too,' he mentally groaned wanting to slap his head on the cold stone floor. He concentrated on the reversal for the curse (thankful he had had his right hand in pocket and had out of habit held his wand). He quickly freed himself, scrambled to his feet and rushed the door.
He waved his wand once with his hand on the knob, but the door didn't budge. 'Damn it, Jean!' He slapped the door in his frustration. 'How did I screw this all up? Why didn't I tell them I didn't remember?' He groaned to himself, slamming his hand into the door again, before focusing on breaking the lock. 'If I hurry I can catch her, and fix this.' He told himself, his hands shaking in desperation, but the spell remained strong and the door unmoved.
"Go sort out your friend!" Jean's voice seeped through the door. His chest tightened at the words.
"Damn it!" He kicked the door, before sinking down against it to sit on the floor. 'Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.' He sat with his back against the door, tapping his head against the wood.
"Remus?" James' voice came through the door. 'Go away.'
"Remus, I'm going to open the door, and then you're going to fix this, or Trevor just might curse us all in our sleep." Sirius tried to laugh. After a moment, his voice came again. "Alright, I'm opening the door." Sirius warned. Remus heaved himself to his feet and turned to the door to see James, Sirius, and Peter.
"Time to talk Moony." James sighed.
"I'm still not sold on that nickname." He muttered.
"Mine neither." Peter muttered but was shushed by a look from James and Sirius.
"That is an issue for another time." James told Peter.
"Spill. What's with you and Jean?" Sirius cut back the issue at hand.
"Last moon, wasn't like the others." He sighed. "I don't remember anything. We were talking about Peter, and if he was going to see me off, and then I wake up in the hospital wing with Trevor and Jean there, and Sirius and her holding hands..."
"We weren't holding hands," Sirius scoffed. "She was scratching at those bloody arrow wounds." Sirius paused and rolled his eyes at the look Remus gave him. "I was keeping her from scratching because Madam Pomfrey said that if she scratched the wounds, then they would take longer to heal and would scar."
"Why didn't you tell us you didn't remember!" James demanded.
"I didn't want you to worry." Remus offered weakly.
"We were already worrying, Jean thought someone must have drugged you."
"She said something about Centaurs and finding me in the hall." Remus said quietly, changing the subject.
"Yeah, you asked us to find Peter, and it was still early, so we left." James said.
"But you started to change early," Peter continued the story, "but Jean found you, and dragged you out of the castle, and locked the doors behind you both."
"It was an infuriating lock – brilliant, though." Sirius chimed in. "Anyways, apparently when you changed back you passed out, and then the Centaurs came. They didn't like you staying after you changed – like you chose to pass out." He scoffed. "When Jean wouldn't let them take you, they shot her, twice, and then Hagrid came and made the Centaurs leave, and carried you both up the hospital wing."
"Trevor said she had a Centaur pinned under her, and when she let him go his back was all ripped up, that all along one side was slashed open." Peter added, with a hint of both fear and awe in his voice.
"He also said not to bring it up, because she felt terrible about it, and he didn't know how Hagrid got her to stop crying." James said flatly, pointedly looking at Peter.
"Right." Peter blushed, and looked at the ground.
"...She's a bear..." Remus remembered her words 'most the time I was a bear'.
"Yeah, a bloody beautiful bear." Sirius smiled, getting a warning look from James, but continued. "A little small for a bear, but then female bears are probably just smaller, anyway, she had this frizzy brown fur and those blue eyes they share." James gave Sirius another look, that finally shut him up.
"That's why she asked who the dog was." Remus said looking at Sirius for the first time. Sirius nodded but didn't explain.
"Yeah, she hadn't been able to change back on her own." James said quietly.
"So all the rumors were to cover for me." Remus breathed. 'Stupid, bloody idiot,' he thought, running his fingers through his hair and harshly rubbing his face.
"It's not like we tried to spread it around, but Bella Burke noticed she never went to bed, and well Bella does like to talk. So by breakfast, everyone was talking about her being out all night." Sirius said.
"Yeah, I don't think Lucinda or Katie let it slip, but someone probably overheard Sirius suggest Jean was him when Lucinda asked." James added.
"So why hang off her all the time, and disappear together?" Remus glared at Sirius. "You know it only made the rumors stronger."
"It also made life less miserable for Jean and me. Trevor told me to fix it, that day we got back and you snubbed her. He thought this was all about the dare and her kissing you and then seeing your bare ass the next night."
"What?" Remus yelped, his eyes wide. He put his head in his hands and groaned loudly. 'Of course, I wouldn't have just been passed out – I was passed out without a stitch on me.' His muffled groan was ignored by the boys, who just waited for him to process the idea. He groaned again as he replayed her voice in his head 'so what if I saw you naked', 'that last look as myself was a little embarrassing' – 'no shit.'
"So," Sirius started again, "Trevor blamed me for starting this mess with the dare, and told me I could either straighten you out or keep Jean's mind off it as much as possible (and you weren't talking to me)." Sirius shrugged. "After the first day, I learned I rather like Jean's company - even knowing she wouldn't snog me. She's also quite mischievous, once you drag it out of her. The painting thing and the lake, both were her." He bragged.
"Great, Jean's you but with tits." James sighed.
"If only, I'm pretty sure girl-me would at least snog me-me and both of us would be fucking amazing." Sirius smiled.
"Shut up, Padfoot." James sighed again.
~.~.~
SLAM!
Jean appeared in the corridor, turning to wave her wand over the door she had slammed behind her. People watched discreetly, as she hurried off with her arms crossed and her jaw clenched. They watched more blatantly after she passed a chatting James, Sirius, and Peter.
"Jeany! What's wrong?" Sirius called, jogging after her.
"Go sort out your friend!" She turned on him, in a rage (tears threatening to fall). The whole corridor turned to stare at them. 'Great, a lover's quarrel will be the next piece of juicy gossip,' she thought gritting her teeth.
"Jean?" A soft voice came from her left, and she felt a small hand on her back. "Are you alright?" She turned to see Lily beside her. "Let's go, yeah? Outside maybe? Get some air?"
"That sounds great." She nodded, and her voiced cracked.
"Jean!" Trevor appeared next to her, rubbing at his wrist and glancing over her. "Come on." He gave a sad smile and opened his arms for her. Jean hugged him without a second thought, and he pulled her close and walked her away. He and Lily leading her from the on looking crowd, leaving Sirius to return to James and Peter. He grabbed them by their sleeves and dragged them over to the door Jean had hurried out of.
"What's wrong?" Lucinda hissed to Lily, with Katie, Trish, and Jane only a step behind, but Lily only shook her head in answer.
"Everyone's talking about Sirius breaking up with Jean in the middle of the corridor." Trish whispered.
"I heard she broke up with him because of his friends." Lucinda whispered, back. Both girls grimacing when Jean groaned into Trevor's shoulder.
"I heard people whispering that she's pissed at him because Remus has a thing for Sirius, and that's why he's been so cold to them both." Jane muttered quietly, which made both Jean and Lily snort.
"Despite the rumors, Remus is not gay or bi." Lily said.
"Neither are, Remus is restrained, and Sirius is quite public about what he likes and that's basically any girl that wants to snog him and isn't looking for a commitment from him." Trevor added in a monotone. "And this is not about Sirius, and he and Jean were never more than friends." Trevor added, squeezing Jean's shoulder.
"You're such a good brother Trevor." Jane patted his upper back. "My brothers are all gits really, but then they're all under seven so maybe they'll grow out of it."
"How'd you even know?" Katie asked blushing when the girls looked at her. "He was with me, and then he just said he had to go and ran off. Then I find Lucinda and she tells me, about Jean and Sirius in the hall."
"Twin thing, I guess." Trevor said stiffly, glancing to his wrist - catching Jean smile at his words (if only for a moment).
~.~.~
"Sorry Sirius, if you want to see Jean, it's not going to happen." Lucinda smirked, her arms crossed over her chest. Trish and Jane stood beside her, the three of them blocking Jean from view.
"Come on Ladies," Sirius smiled, "You know I didn't do anything." He implored a little flirtatiously.
"That is what Trevor said." Trish hissed to the other girls.
"So? One of them did something!" Jane glared at the boys.
"Yeah, none of you are seeing her. Now run along or get hexed." Lucinda dismissed them, gripping her wand at her side.
"I did it." Remus' voice was sad. He squeezed through James and Sirius and stood in front of his friends and looked sheepishly at the girls. "Do your worst." He offered, stretching his arms out to either side.
"We can't curse him, he's sick again – look at him." Trish whispered to the other two girls.
"I'd deserve it." He shrugged, surprising them that he had heard. "I've been an ass for weeks, I just want to fix this with Jean, and hopefully, be able to call her a friend again." The girls looked at each other, unable to decide.
"Come on ladies." Sirius smiled. "Give him a moment with Jean. I doubt it would take much for her to hex him herself, but I'll do it if he doesn't fix this."
"Assuming Trevor, doesn't beat you to it." James laughed.
"Thanks, guys." Remus said bitterly.
"Anytime Mooney." Sirius and James said together, patting him on the back in tandem.
"Just say you're sorry already." Peter muttered, from behind James and Sirius.
"Fine." The three girls said together and turned to walk back up the lawn. Sitting on the courtyard wall, was Trevor with his arm around Jean. Standing in front of them were Lily and Katie. Seeing them, Trevor whispered something to Jean. When she nodded, he got up and led Lily and Katie to the approaching group.
"I want us to be good too, Trevor." Remus said quietly, as he, Lily, and Katie were passing him.
"Me too." Trevor's voice matched his, sad and quite, as he and girls continued down the lawn.
Then he was alone, some three meters from Jean, with everyone else down the yard behind him. He sighed to himself and forced his feet to carry him forward. Jean wasn't looking at him, she was curled up between the arches on the wall. Her right arm hung down along the wall and fiddled with her wand.
~.~.~
"Hi, Jean." He announced himself. 'Stood there long enough,' she thought rolling her eyes to herself.
"...Lupin..." She muttered distastefully, seeing that some sort of acknowledgment was needed.
"I deserve that." He sighed with a sad nod.
"You deserve a lot of things." She said without missing a beat.
"Yes... I do." He sat on the wall under the next arch in the stone. "I'm sorry Jean. I'd say it was because I'm not feeling well, but that's a cop-out."
"No one can hear us, Remus." She held her wand up beside her head and wiggled it.
"Remus?" He asked before he could help himself (his voice hopeful). 'Damn it.'
"Sorry." She looked up and scowled at him. "Lupin." She corrected, leaning into the stone, and crossing her arms over her chest, staring at him with her jaw clench. 'Just had to point it out.'
"Right... stupid me." He sighed.
"I understand you're wolf-P.M.S.-ing," she said, smirking at his displeasure for the phrase, "but that doesn't mean I forgive you being a huge arse."
"I hadn't told anyone until James and Sirius unlocked that bloody door," He said, and she smirked again, "but I don't remember the last full moon."
"Do you have any idea how STUPID that was?" She yelled, her feet popping to either side of the wall as she sat forward.
"I do, but please let me finish."
"Go ahead." She rolled her eyes. 'We are so not dropping this,' she thought as she leaned back, glaring at him again.
"So there was that kiss... that amazing kiss." He looked at her hoping to see her expression soften. 'Really? You think you'd say that, and I'd fall into your arms?' She mentally scoffed and tightened her arms across her chest. "Then I wake up in the hospital wing, and saw Sirius holding your hand, and then all the rumors started. I thought you had used me to make him jealous." He shrugged. "So I was hurt, but... but mostly I was jealous..."
"For fuck's sake, Remus!" She hissed, jumping off the wall and onto her feet. "Do you expect me to hear that, and forgive you? Yes, I didn't just kiss you so I didn't have to kiss Sirius. Yes, I would have loved to get the confusion a month ago! BUT NOW? AFTER WHAT YOU DID?"
"I'm sorry Jean. I didn't mean it like that." He stood, shaking his head, and reached for her hand, only to grimace when she shrank away. "I know it will take a long time to get back our friendship, let alone build anything more. Please just tell me, you forgive me enough for us to try and be friends again."
"Yeah, Remus." She nodded sadly. "I'd like that... but no touching..." She frowned at his hand, that was outstretched again.
"Sure." He nodded, putting his hand back at his side.
"Now go get the guys, we need to figure out what happened to you last moon." She ordered stiffly.
"I think I might have an idea," he said softly pulling an envelope out of his pocket. "I got it the first morning of the school year. It's from Greyback, calling me to join my own kind." The last sentence seemed bitter on his tongue. "He's been forming a pack." She read the letter he handed to her. Disbelief and disgust washing her face.
"'Join your Maker, or be un-made.'" She muttered the last line.
A/N - Thanks to Brian1972 for your comment - I have been trying to balance things like character development and Jean and Trevor planning and the plot points, but sometimes I feel like I'm forgetting something and comments like this can really help me remember what it is that I wanted to write but forgot to write down. So thank you.
