As promised, to those who were unable to read the last chapter due to sensitivity, I will shortly explain what happened. Fai was raped by Ashura. I cringed whilst writing it and considered not uploading it, seeing as though I love Fai a lot but in the end decided I should. It only makes the ending so much better. This is the nearly the end of this fan fiction, and by tomorrow I will no longer be a high school student, which will make me very emotional. I dedicate this chapter to my dearest friends and hope them the best for the future. You may have noticed the chapter names have changed. The chapter names are all in French, seeing as though the book is called "Avant ce soir", meaning "Before Tonight". I will let everyone know what all the chapter names mean at the end of this chapter. Thank you for reading. Doodle.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kurogane's POV
I felt anxiety pulse through me, like it was a new type of oxygen being pumped around my body. It built up until I felt I would burst, my fists remaining clenched at my side. We had decided to get some rest, considering we were all pretty tired but, whilst the kid, his princess and the furball slept, I sat there waiting. I waited for the dawn to come, my eyes refusing to close in case I fell asleep. I couldn't shake this worry that took a hold on me. I felt as if someone was throwing buckets of icy water over my head repeatedly. What was this feeling? It felt like something bad was happening, but I just didn't know what. I would always feel this way if I thought Tomoyo was in danger…but I'd never had it with anyone else before. But it seemed like forever since I felt this way. Had I lost all that connection with Tomoyo? It was now replaced by Fai, someone I cared for unconditionally, someone I longed to have in my arms right now to assure me he was safe.
I felt uneasy and uncomfortable as I sat by the window, Mokana sleeping soundly in my lap. He had formed a sort of bond with me without me even knowing it, from the moment I'd apologised he had refused to leave my side. I awaited irritation, but it never arrived. I guess it was because Mokana's presence was a sort of substitution for Fai's absence, his presence keeping me sane in some way. I stared outside, pressing my forehead against the cool glass. The spot where Fai had fallen remained spotlighted in my mind, a place I couldn't tear my gaze from no matter how hard I tried. It sent violent chills through my body and all I could do was stare at it, my mind struggling to distract itself.
The uncontrollable feelings of anxiety and uneasiness told me something was wrong, that something was happening right now to Fai. I felt helpless as I sat there, my three companions in a deep, peaceful slumber, the thought of tomorrow a distant memory to them for now. Tomorrow lingered before me like a light in the darkness, refusing to dim, reminding me over and over that I will be seeing Fai again, dead or alive, and that all of our lives will be on the line. For all I knew, Fai could be dying now…for all I knew, he was dead. For all I knew, he'd tried to escape…for what it was worth, I had no idea what was going on to the person I loved…
* * * *
Before I had realised what had happened, my eyes were closed and I was awakening to amber light that was slowly growing lighter outside. My eyes took a moment to adjust, my brain slowly clicking into motion until I understood what had happened. My eyes snapped fully awake and I jerked upwards, staring out of the window, causing Mokana to tumble out of my lap, whining as he rolled. I blinked; rubbing my eyes with my fists before realising it was the early hours of the morning. Dawn. I heaved a sigh of relief, allowing myself to heave back against the wall I was leaning against, rubbing my aching temples. Seems my head was still a little tender from yesterday…
"Wah! Kuro-daddy is ignoring me!" Mokana wailed, waving its arms up and down as he hopped back onto my lap with a light thud.
I was too tired and too nervous about today to correct him on my name. I picked him up and put him down on the window-sill, climbing off to get a change of shirt. I glanced over at the spot where the kid and the princess were sleeping. Syaoran was wide awake, in a fresh change of clothes but of course not to far away from the princess. He'd been watching me and he smiled a little when he saw me, a fretted expression in his eyes that I'd never seen before. I returned his smile with a lot of force, trying to push away the queasy feeling twisting in my stomach.
Silence cut between us like a slice of ice as I changed out of my clothes into my own clothing from my home world, looking for the blade that had made a poor substitute to my sword I'd handed over to the Dimensional Witch. I felt Syaoran's flashing over to me and then away, as if he was trying to pluck up the courage to speak. Eventually, he seemed to gather enough of it to talk.
"I think we should contact the Dimensional Witch…" he said slowly, picking each word carefully in his head. "She can offer us something that can lead us closer to Fai's location…we might have to give up something but…"
"I'd give up anything…" I muttered before thinking about it. I didn't even regret what I'd said. I froze for an instant before continuing getting ready, collecting the sword as I rose to my feet.
"I understand," Syaoran said thoughtfully. I turned to face him to see he looked sympathetic, his eyes staring adoringly at Sakura's sleeping face. I watched him for a moment, turning my eyes swiftly to her. The first thing that appeared in my mind was me in Syaoran's position and Fai in Sakura's, watching over him protectively, with that same love and affection in his eyes.
Sakura's eyes opened slowly and Syaoran hastily looked away, fussing with his gloves as if he'd just put them on. As Syaoran greeted her good morning and allowed her to retreat into the next room to get changed, I drifted back to the window. I fell into a sort of numbness, my mind not really taking in anything. I placed my hand over my chest, feeling my heart throbbing against my ribcage. I was terrified…not of that witch but of what I may find…what would I do if I found Fai badly hurt…or worse? I remembered what I'd promised him, the vow I'd made. That if he died, I would follow him…and now more than ever, I knew those words were true. I would die with him…so either way we would always be together…
"Why do you contact me so early in the morning?"
I snapped instantly back to reality and swung around to see Yuuko's face, dark eyes narrowed down upon Sakura and Syaoran. I joined them immediately, feeling my breath hitch as I looked up at her. She had the ability to take us to Fai…hope flickered within me like a candle in a pitch black cave. I started praying rapidly in my head, repeating the same thing over and over: 'Please, please, please help us…'
"I'm sorry for the time," Syaoran apologised briskly, bowing before her as if a show of politeness would make amends. "But we're in a bit of trouble right now and we need your help."
"And what help would that be?" Yuuko asked quickly, almost before Syaoran could complete his sentence. Her profile remained unreadable, straight faced.
"Fai-san," Sakura spoke suddenly, catching all of us off guard.
Yuuko looked a little surprised too, but composed her features before it became blatant. I noticed her eyes glancing quickly around the room and finally her eyes narrowed as she saw Fai was no where in sight.
"I see," she said shortly, her words sending a clear message that she knew exactly what had happened. "Now…this will be a high price…King Ashura…"
"Who?" I interrupted, staring at her. "The person who took Fai was a woman…"
"Masquerade…" it was Yuuko's turn to cut me off, sounding slightly exasperated. "She is a servant of Lord Ashura. Lord Ashura is the one Fai was running from…it seems he sent Masquerade in to do his dirty work…" she paused, considering something silently within her own thoughts. "The price will be high, as I said before…and the one to pay it," she added, when Syaoran opened his mouth to speak. "Will be Kurogane." I flinched at the sound of my own name being spoken, all eyes in the room turning to me.
I stepped forward, my fists clenched at my sides. Everything was coming together. I felt closer than ever before to saving Fai…
"What would I have to pay?" I asked tentatively, afraid of the answer before the question had left my lips.
"There are two things that are equally important to you," Yuuko spoke slowly and thoughtfully. "The first is your wish to return to your home world and the second, your relationship with Fai. Both are equally as important, and I will give you the choice of either. Choose the first, and you will never be able to return to your home world, ever again. Or choose the second, and you will share the same fate as Syaoran. Fai will lose all memory of you once you leave Ashura's fortress, and those memories can never be regained."
My hope turned to ice and shattered almost immediately. Straight away, I felt a wall coming between Fai and me, our hands nearly touching only for a wall to come between us, a wall I had to knock down but in the end, I would lose something precious. I should've known Yuuko's prices wouldn't be cheap…but I had relaxed too quickly.
Syaoran seemed to notice I was struggling and stepped forward.
"Isn't there anything else we can offer you?" he inquired, looking helpless as he turned from me, to Yuuko and back again.
"No. You have given up the one and only important thing to you," Yuuko shrugged off the suggestion without a second thought. "There is nothing else you can offer me, Syaoran. The only payment high enough, lie with Kurogane and his two most treasured possessions. One, he has carried with him from the start and the second he had developed along the way."
"I've decided," I couldn't stand to hear her talk about it anymore, my mind was set.
Yuuko blinked, taken aback. "Are you sure, Kurogane?" she pressed. "You realise once you decide, you can't take it back?"
I nodded, narrowing my eyes to meet her stunned gaze. I felt like smirking at her expression, like laughing at all of the faces of the people in the room. They all stared at me, all awaiting my answer.
I smiled at Yuuko. Yes, there was no going back. I was sure…I'd never been so sure about anything in my life…but all the same I was sorry…
* * * *
Fai's POV
My body was in utter and complete agony, curling up in a ball to prevent the searing ache that pierced every part of me. I hugged my knees to my chest, my eyes closed tightly as I tried to think. It wouldn't be long now…right now, Masquerade would be preparing herself for the greatest moment in her life. The moment she was given the chance to take away my life.
It was hard to believe my life was over. I began to wonder if Sakura would ever gather all of her feathers…and when she did, would she and Syaoran get together. I smiled half heartedly. Of course they would. Those two were made for one another. Nothing on this earth could stop them from being together. I'd seen it from the start, from the moment I'd first set eyes on them when we'd all turned up to visit the Dimensional Witch, our wishes different but our fates the same. I'd seen the pain inflicted upon Syaoran when he had to choose between the life of his Princess and her memory of him…I'd known I could never make that choice…and even to this day, I wouldn't know what I'd do. I wondered if Kurogane would ever make it back to his home world…and if he did, what would happen to him then. Would he act like nothing had ever happened? Would he continue with his life and not worry himself about the kids and me? What about Mokana? Where would he go? My life was bound to finding Sakura's feather, travelling worlds. It was hard to imagine a world without that quest, that life I'd led for months. I still half expected to find a feather floating around, to pick it up and see Syaoran's face light up at the mere sight of it. To see Kurogane pleased that we'd be changing worlds. To see Sakura turn a little warmer and a little more of her former self. All of that…I missed and yearned to witness one more time…
I hissed as a pulsing sharp pain erupted down my lower back and down to where my body was hurting the most. I'd found myself back underground in a cellar, my hands unchained this time, my clothes returned. I'd examined the damage the moment I'd regained consciousness and even now my lips tightened as the thought of it. My body was definitely more than two shades now. Bites, bruises, scratches, cuts…the area around my lower back was literally black, my hips purple from where Ashura had gripped me, his finger marks still visible against the angry marks. My lip was cut and continued to bleed, and the area underneath my left eye was a dark cloudy black.
I wondered what Kurogane would say if he could see me now…he would probably vow revenge. I smiled faintly, a smile that made my face hurt. I wanted that more than anything…for Kurogane to turn up and rescue me, to give Ashura what he deserved, to save me forever…
I heard footsteps. The creak of the door above me. My heart seemed to stop for a few moments, my eyes snapping open wide as my heart suddenly started beating again, the rate increasing as the blood drained from my face. My smile vanished.
"I was a fool…to believe…" I whispered, closing my eyes as I rested my forehead against the stone floor. A hot tear spilled down my cheek as I awaited death.
Death is a common friend in the world…I only hoped that death would be a stranger for a few more years…
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cliff hanger. What did Kurogane decide? And even if he did pay the highest price, would he be too late?
Okay now to write what the chapter names mean.
Chapter One: Temps à combattre means "Time To Fight"
Chapter Two: Bataille perdante means "Losing Battle"
Chapter Three: Quand nous combattons means "When We Fight"
Chapter Four: Je pense je t'aime means "I Think I Love You"
Chapter Five: Ne peut pas croire que je vous ai perdu means "Cannot Believe I Lost You"
Chapter Six: Vengeance means "Revenge"
And now Chapter Seven: Un ami a appelé Death means "A Friend Called Death"
Thanks again for reading. Please Review.
Doodle
