I raised an eyebrow as I met the angry stare of the hyenas; their yellow eyes seemed to be accusing me of Harley's disappearance. Since the night before, she had vanished again, this time leaving all of her possessions (including her costume) behind. I knew I had hurt her feelings when I had refused to speak to her. I still was angry with her for foolishly lingering her feelings for the Joker, but part of me couldn't help but be troubled by her absence. She HAD to be coming back, right? After all, hadn't she left everything she valued behind?
I threw a pot at the hyenas to make them get away from me. "Don't give me that look! It's HER fault that she has to be such a hopeless doormat for that bastardly clown."
Scattering in all directions to avoid contact with the pot, the hyenas whined and went to lie down near the sofa…near the empty spot that Harley should have been sitting in. I was irked. What if she didn't come back this time? True, the first time she had only been getting her pets out of the zoo, but this time there seemed to be an eerie feeling that was making my skin crawl.
In spite of my anger, I really wanted her to come back.
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(Harley's POV)
Yuck, I hated getting all wet from the rain! The dampness was soaking my body from head to toe and I could feel the beginning of a cold in my runny nose. I was far away from Ivy's place now, as I wandered aimlessly through the narrow alleyways of Gotham.
Red was in a bad mood and after she repeatedly refused to answer so much as a grunt to me, I couldn't take it anymore and decided to go out by myself for a day or so. I wasn't just ready yet to go back to my Puddin'…we still needed some more time away from each other. I was worried about my Mistah J…I hoped that he was all right and that he wasn't still mad about having to ditch me to the cops last time. I would try harder for him the next time.
Squinting under the streetlights, I could have sworn that I saw the freaky shape of a bat, but I assured myself that it was just one of the occasional hallucinations that Dr. Leland said I suffered from. If Batman really were there, I'd give that stupid flying rodent what for. Even without my costume, I was ready to take on anything that stood in my way.
"Batsy? You there?" No reply. Whatever I had seen in the darkness was gone now. Ole Batman was most certainly not freaking there.
A small night breeze made me trip clumsily on the pavement, making me giggle randomly. There wasn't really anyone around at this time of night. To tell ya the truth, I was pretty much alone.
Huh. That was weird. The street I was on…it seemed so familiar. I was in the more suburban part of Gotham now and for some reason, I couldn't help but feel like I had been there before.
Before I met Red and my Puddin'…
Long ago…
It hit me like a blow from my favorite mallet weapon: I was on the street where I had grown up. God, how long had it been? Nine years? Ten? The last time I had been here, I was just getting ready to leave for college.
I started to smile and run down the sidewalk to look for the house when I was cut short by a voice…a voice from the past.
"You want to go to that university and leave your own Mother behind? I raise you, bring you up and you want to go away all just because you want to pursue a career as a SHRINK? Don't be a fool, Harleen. You're not that type."
And then, my voice, younger and strange sounding, a lot less clownish.
"No, Mama. I want to go. I can't stay here forever, having to watch you drink. It's always about what YOU want. When are you going to realize that I have a life outside of yours? When are you going to be proud of me and what I do? Ever since Daddy died-""Don't you take that tone, young lady! Don't you dare mention your father to me. You should be ashamed of yourself, after all I did for you."
"That's the thing, Ma, what DID you do for me? All you ever did was neglect me and put my dreams down. All you ever did was stagger home from the bars and take your grief out on me. I'm sick of it. I'm going to that college because I want to have a life outside your grief. MY LIFE. The life you denied me."
"…Fine…you want to go? Go then. But from here on out, I'm not going to help you. I don't want to see your face on this street again. You can struggle by yourself and when you see that you were wrong, I won't be there you save you. Get out of this house."
My Mother…such a bitter woman. My Daddy died when I was only eight and since then, Mama would never look at me unless to scold or glare at me. I think she thought it was my fault. Often, I would have to sit through her hateful, drunken ramblings as she exposed each and every one of my flaws while I'd stare up at her, a little girl with tear-filled blue eyes, thinking that I was to blame for everything. After I went to Gotham University, I hadn't seen or heard from her.
Biting my lip, I went down the row of houses until I found the one I was looking for. She still had to live here. I was going to see her and maybe she would be changed. I had completely forgotten that I was a wanted criminal in over a dozen states. I just wanted to see her again and perhaps reconcile.
Like I had expected, the door was locked and I had to sneak in through the window. The house still looked the same, broken faucet, creaky floorboards and all. Mama's bedroom was just up the stairs.
On my tiptoes, I slunk up the stairway like one of the little creepy-crawlies ya see in horror films, sucking in the air around me as I kept myself hidden in the shadows. Mama had apparently gone off to bed.
Slinking slowly down the hall, I approached the bedroom feeling very much like a naughty child that knows it is past her bedtime. Mama was in bed all right and boy did she look old! Even when I left her she had looked old for her age, but now she looked like one of those elderly crones that live in those icky nursing homes.
I cleared my throat, and before I had time to take another step forward, her dark-blue eyes blinked open and she was screaming her lungs out at the sight of me.
"Who are you? Stay back or I'll call the police!"
"Mama…Ma, it's me. I'm home."
She blinked dumbly up at me, perhaps recognizing me despite my pigtails and loopy expression.
"Ha-Harleen? Is that y-you?"
I giggled and nodded, eager to see an expression of joy light up her old-looking face. Sure, I was considered to be a dangerous nutcase and all, but maybe my old Mother would be glad to see me. Maybe she was over me leaving her to pursue my goals years ago. Maybe, she would weep with bliss at the sight of me and not care about who I was or what I was doing to Gotham…and maybe my thoughts were so full of bull that I needed to have my head unscrewed.
"You-I heard all about you on the news…all the things you've done. You were labeled as insane and committed to Arkham asylum."
"Yup. But I ain't here ta start trouble, Mama. I wanted ta see you again. Didja miss me? Don't you wanna see your daughter, who you haven't seen in forever?"
I leaned forward towards the bed where she was still sitting up in, eager to hear her say that she missed me, that she didn't care that I was the gal of the greatest criminal in the whole world. Her reply stung even greater than anything she ever said to me when I had been living with her.
"You're not my daughter. Not anymore."
My legs buckled and I gasped but her eyes glared at me from across the room. I felt sick.
"Mama…but…but I-"
"I'm not your mother. You're a…a freak who needs to be locked away and now I'm calling the police."
The room was spinning. My Mother…my own Mother disowns me…she hasn't changed…she never cared about me. Never.
She got up and reached for the phone on the desk and my head was burning with thoughts of murder. I had a knife with me, I could slit her throat right here on the spot…I could kill my Mother and be free of her hateful figure looming over my life at last.
And then a part of me, the part that was still the rational Harleen Quinzel that I thought was gone forever, caused me to turn away. In a flash and without thinking like usual, I jumped out the two-story bedroom window and fell to the ground like a stupid bird would after crashing into a wall during flight.
Getting to my feet in agony, I could hear my mother above, screaming into the phone that I had come to kill her. The final blow.
Groaning in fatigue, I began to run limply as fast as I could, vowing that I would never come to this street again. Never, ever, EVER.
Just my luck, rain was beginning to come down in a shower, making me feel the picture of miserable. Where was I to go now? Red was still pissed off at me and my heart just couldn't take any more pain. I wasn't about to stay out here and wait for the police or Batman to snatch my broken-hearted little hide.
Coughing and choking on tears, I turned and headed back to Ivy's, the pain in my heart greater than the pain of my aching body.
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(Back to Ivy's POV)
Late at night, there was a pitiful little knock at the door and I knew it was Harley. She was limping and running a temperature and it looked like she was under more suffering than I could ever imagine.
I wanted to turn her away for getting me scared again but when I met her eyes, I couldn't bring myself to do it. She looked distraught. Not even the Joker could make her look this miserable. So, I let her in and wrapped up the bruises that were appearing on her knees and arms and gave her some herbal medicine and put her to sleep on the sofa.
I dismissed all still-angry feelings I had towards her. Whatever had happened to her that night, I was sure she would tell me in time. I hoped she would.
