Hey guys, another update. Thankfully, not a long wait this time. * laughs * I hope you all are having a great December so far.
Thanks to kyla713 and Darcysmom for looking this over. As well as Heather, Nikki and packy.
Enjoy!
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Watching her pack was hard when all I wanted to do was childishly grab everything she was packing into her suitcase and put it back. I selfishly wanted her to stay. Deep down, even though I knew I shouldn't doubt her, I had the fear that she wouldn't be back. So, as I watched her, I cataloged everything about her. The way her hair hung and hid her face, the way her body moved, and her hands small but sure as she placed each new item in her suitcase.
Before she zipped up her suitcase, I smelled the tears. The need to grab her and hold her was too strong. My arms were around her before she could wipe her tears away.
"I never want to be the cause of tears, love. I know that this is something you have to do. So dry those eyes." I said, as I leaned my head down and kissed the top of her head, inhaling her precious scent deep, as deep as I could pull it. "For me?" I whispered as I tilted her head up and looked into her eyes.
Bella nodded and bit her lip. The desire to kiss her was overwhelming, but I held back.
"So, I have a suggestion, if that is okay with you?" I asked before I turned around and started to head back into my room. I grabbed a clean shirt and took off the one I was wearing before putting the new one on. I then also took a button down shirt from my closet before making my way back to Bella.
I nervously handed her the button down and the shirt I was wearing, hoping she would like my idea. "I figure if we have something with each other's scents on it, maybe that will make all of this easier?" I told her, hanging my head low, waiting for rejection.
She flung herself into my embrace and wrapped her arms around my neck, kissing my cheek. "Sounds like a perfect plan to me, Edward. I guess I'll be changing into my boyfriend's shirt before I go, then." She said, winking.
I doubt she even realized what she had called me, but I couldn't deny how much warmth it brought to me. I didn't want to correct her -I knew we had a long way to go, a lot of talks ahead of us and so much to do before we got back to where we were once before. I only hoped that we would get there. I know we had decided on taking another chance, but I wasn't sure where we completely stood with that.
A knock at her door made the realization that I would be without her again- even if only for a few days at most- crash down around me. My hands shook as I turned to face the door and Bella yelled out to Jasper that he could come in. In his mind, he felt bad for interrupting, but Bella was already running late.
He smiled and looked over toward her. "All packed, Bella? Oh, and Alice said Charlie will be needing this." he said as he handed Bella a package from Alice, since even Jasper didn't know the contents.
"Yeah, just about packed. I should be down in a few minutes. Just need to add a few things and change," she said with a smile.
"So, I guess, um, I'll let you change and be on your way," I said, feeling anxious all of a sudden as I left her room and stood outside her door.
She came out a couple of minutes later wearing my button down shirt, her coat draped over her arm as she tugged her carry-on behind her.
I forced the lump in my throat down as I took her carry-on and followed her down the stairs.
"You ready?" I asked, my voice sounding off to me, grittier than before.
Bella nodded and grabbed a hold of my hand as we continued on down the stairs. It felt like the longest walk I had ever taken, and I didn't want it to end. I didn't want to reach that moment where she let go of my hand.
"You promise to call?" I asked, feeling so much like a small child that was completely unsure of themselves. Giving Bella the control this time was hard, very hard.
She came up and hugged me, holding me tight as she kissed my cheek again. "I promise, Edward. I plan to call you before I take off and when I land, and as much as I can when I'm at Charlie's. I've never broken a promise to you. I don't plan to start now."
Those last words hit me hard in the gut. She's never broken a promise...but I had. I promised to never leave her, but I did two years ago. How could she possibly be okay with me now? I could feel my walls crumbling as I tried to keep myself in check long enough to see her off. It had been decided as Bella packed that Jasper and Alice would be taking her. Carlisle was too afraid to let me go out in public again, seeing as I hadn't hunted since being back in the States. He didn't want to take the chance, no matter how badly I wanted to go with her.
"So, I guess I'll see you all in a week." Bella said as she hugged each of us before going out the front door with Alice and Jasper.
My knees nearly buckled when I heard the car door slam shut. I barely made it back up the stairs and to my room as I listened to the car start and drive down the driveway.
Everyone that remained in the house wanted to come check on me, but decided to leave me alone. And I wanted to be alone. If how I was feeling was half of what Bella felt when I left her, then I didn't know how she survived the crushing emotion of such dark loneliness.
Some time later, my phone rang. I answered, and was greeted by Bella's voice.
"Is it weird of me to say that I miss you so much already, even though I left a few hours ago?" she said, her voice thick with emotion.
"Not at all, lo-Bella. I feel the same."
"I left my shirt on my bed for you." She sighed as I heard the boarding call for her flight. "I guess I'll talk to you in a few hours, Edward. Spend some time with your family, okay? For me? Please?"
When Bella hung up, I still kept the phone to my ear, not ready for that connection to be severed.
It was near one in the morning when she called again, telling me that she had landed and that she and Charlie were going to get a hotel room in Seattle and drive home in the morning. The urge to plead for her to just come back to me was stronger than ever. That, and the need to just say I love you. Again, a click and a dial phone brought back my loneliness, despite the few minutes of respite hearing her voice had brought.
Sometime around four in the morning, my family decided they needed to intervene. I sighed, knowing resistance was completely futile. They'd just come in anyway.
"Come in." I said, resigned.
Carlisle poked his head in before walking into my room, smiled and shut the door.
"You know, this is the first time in two years that she's left to see Charlie." Carlisle said as he sat down on the floor across from me. I took notice in the fact that he didn't say that she went home to Charlie.
"She fought hard, very hard to stay with us these past two years. Such a little thing, but full of so much fight and passion. She surprised even me," he said, smiling as memories fluttered through his mind. "The only time she left home, left us, was to find you. Something deep down inside of her told her she'd find you. It was that conviction that told me you were so much more than mated. You were two parts of a whole. I sometimes wonder if the both of you share the same soul."
I looked up at my father then, wondering just what he meant by that. "It's in the way you both carry yourselves and in the way you love. The need for family, and the fierce loyalty you both have. It's in the way you two look at each other, like the world comes together again." he said, his eyes looking more glassy as he went on. "It's in the way you both doubt yourselves, put yourselves down and think that neither of you are destined for amazing things, such as for each other."
I wanted to deny it all, refute everything he just said, but deep down, as the truth settled in me, I knew he was right. So I looked up at him, nodded, silently begging him to continue.
"The first time I saw the two of you together, I could feel the magic in the air. Fate's stirring, building. I knew that for you and for her, there would never be another. So, when you came to me that September, telling me you had to leave...I knew we were facing ruin. I say ruin because you, for all intents and purposes, are my first child, but Bella...She was, and still is, the glue that held this family's foundation together. And if she hadn't fought so fiercely to be with us, it pains me to think that we might not even be here right now."
The rest of the house was silent, every other family member listening to Carlisle, and in their heads, voicing their complete agreement.
"I know you are scared, and that you don't know what will happen in the future. None of us do, but what I do know is that girl will always come back to you. Because she can't live without her soul, just as you can't. Unfortunately, you both learned this the hard way."
Carlisle moved from his spot on the floor and came over to sit next to me, placing his arm around my shoulders and pulling me closer into a hug.
"I tell you all of this now, so that you fight for her just as fiercely as she fought for you. Show her that you are just as strong as she is, that you will be waiting for her, not agonizing over her being gone for a few days. Show her that you know that she will always come back, Edward. Show her that you have trust in this relationship, that you are all in."
I nodded, admitting that I really needed to hear this, to know what to do. Deep down, I knew it, I just needed the affirmation.
"I don't plan to let her down this time."
"Good, because if you hurt my daughter again, don't think I won't take you outside and tear you limb from limb," he said as he chuckled and winked at me. "Now, I believe you have a phone call to make? Alice said she's still awake, unable to sleep."
Carlisle got up and left my room, tossing my phone to me, just before he left through the door. It rang a couple times before Bella picked up, exhaustion evident in her voice.
"Hello?"
"Hey...So, I hear you are having trouble sleeping?" I asked as I picked at the carpet on the floor.
"Yeah. It is oddly quiet here. I miss Emmett's laugh waking me up at odd times during the night." she said, giggling.
"Yeah, well, at least he is good for that," I replied, obviously joking.
She loves my laugh and she knows it! I only do it to annoy her. She's funny as hell when she wakes up grumpy. Reminds me of a grizzly. Emmett said, directing his thoughts to me. I let out a soft chuckle.
"How about I hum you to sleep? Maybe your lullaby?" I asked, hoping she'd allow me this.
"I can never say no to you, Edward. I'd love it if you did," she said, a yawn breaking through the phone.
I started to softly hum her lullaby, and then went into Esme's song. Soon, her breathing evened out, signaling that she had fallen asleep. I whispered a goodnight before hanging up, suddenly feeling so much lighter than I had hours before.
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Thanks for reading, guys! I hope you enjoyed!
