"What are they hiding?" Clint asked Steve.
Steve thanked the lunch lady before stepping to the side for Clint to pay for his lunch. "Who?"
"Tony!" Clint hissed. "And Bruce… and Loki." He grabbed his lunch tray and followed Steve to their lunch table. "They're keeping something from us."
Steve shrugged his shoulders anxiously, sitting down thoughtfully. "Like what?"
Clint grimaced. He wasn't too sure what. "I don't know."
"What don't you know?" Rhodey asked, sitting next to Clint and placing his chocolate milk on his friend's tray.
"You don't care," Clint grumbled, opening his milk carton.
Rhodey rolled his eyes. "They're not hiding anything."
"They are!"
Steve fidgeted in his seat. "I don't know, Rhodes…"
Rhodey gave up, deciding instead to bite into his soggy slice of pizza. "You see it too, huh?" Clint asked.
Steve nodded. "I do," he said, watching Bruce and Tony lead a disgruntled Loki to their table.
o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o
He wasn't going to bring it up in the car. For one, he didn't want to cause an accident, albeit indirectly. Technically it will be Loki who caused the crash but, obviously, indirectly. And two, Thor was an unmitigated coward.
Ask him to slay a dragon or battle a horde of rogue rhinoceros's and he was your man. Ask him to attempt a conversation with his brother, Thor would much rather tango with a rabid bear.
Thor also wasn't going bring it up before dinner. Because then his brother would be in a sour mood and his parents would notice and then they'd ask what was wrong and Thor really didn't feel like telling them. Especially if it was Loki's secret.
Or during dinner because that's just stupid.
No, Thor waited for the proper moment to confront, or rather, ask his brother to let him in. And let him know just what the hell was going on.
o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o
Loki waved goodbye to Viola before ending their online tutoring session. He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. He knew Thor wanted to talk to him. It was always obvious when Thor wanted to talk to him.
So Loki swung his chair around to face the door knowing that any moment, he was going to knock and do his best to act nonchalant even though he was dying to know whatever it was he wanted to know.
Knock knock knock.
There it was. Loki took a deep breath before saying, "Come in."
Thor opened the door sheepishly, smiling meekly at his brother before closing it behind him. "Hello."
"Hello."
Thor shuffled his foot as the two stared at one another.
"Well?" Loki asked, hoping to get this whole conversation over with.
Thor made his way to Loki's bed, sitting delicately upon it and clearing his throat. "I know not how to begin," he said quietly, looking at Loki who sat so far across the room.
Loki sighed as he rose from his seat and sat next to his brother. "How do you wish for this conversation to go?" Loki asked, ever hopeful that perhaps their relationship should not be a strained one.
Thor chuckled sadly to himself. "I wish that we were as we once were, brother," Thor admitted. "We were once inseparable, you and I."
"That we were," Loki agreed.
"What has changed us, so?" Thor asked, staring intently at Loki. "You and I once shared all our secrets. They were ours, not yours nor mine own. It was always Thor and Loki, Loki and Thor. Now that 'and' has become harsh and cold. Unfeeling and distant."
Loki smiled. "You should be a poet, brother."
Thor knocked his knee playfully into Loki's. "Now is not the time for jest," Thor scolded, though a smile played upon his lips.
Loki lay back onto his bed, staring up at the ever familiar ceiling and the Millennium Falcon that dangled from it. "We have taken two different paths, brother," Loki said. "It is as simple as that."
"But – "
"We cannot hold on to each other forever, though we may wish it," Loki continued. "We were never alike, you and I. It would always happen, no matter how hard we try."
Thor leaned back as well, so their shoulders were touching; just as when they were children. "I had hoped that we could at least remain civil."
Loki laughed coldly. "Is that not what we are?"
"More than civil," Thor corrected.
"You wish to know my secrets, Thor," Loki stated. "And I do not wish to tell you them."
Thor closed his eyes. "I wish for you to trust me, Loki."
"Trust you?" Loki spat. "How many times have I told you my darkest secrets for you to tell Mother or Father?"
"I was a child," Thor answered, opening his eyes and turning his body to face Loki. "Secrets of children can never be kept. I admit I was not the best brother I could have been but I am trying."
"You are always trying."
The two were silent. Loki knew he was being unfair. But these were not tiny secrets. He was not admitting to letting Fenrir loose to chase the neighborhood kids. He was not telling Thor that it was he who convinced Baldur to jump into the deep end of the swimming pool though he knew not how to swim. This was different.
"Do you wish me to stop?" Thor whispered.
Loki took a breath. "No." Loki never wanted that. He has never wanted that.
The two brothers lay quietly on the bed, listening to the other breathe and wondering what had happened to them.
Thor still remembered the first time he saw Loki, a small bundle of a child with dark, dark hair in his mother's arms. He was only two and it should be impossible to recall but it was a memory ingrained in Thor's mind.
A pale, green eyed baby boy that stared up at Thor with wide, interested eyes. Thor had never seen a baby before and was frightened that he would hurt him. But later, when Loki had been put to sleep his mother came into his room and held him in her arms, telling him how as Loki's big brother he must watch over and protect him. That they were brothers and that was a bond that could never be broken.
And Loki still remembered how during thunderstorms, he would shiver in fright. He couldn't sleep and he couldn't calm his nerves. He would quietly creep through the hall, his cookie monster plushie held tightly to his chest, and enter Thor's room. He'd stand at the edge of the bed and whisper his brother's name until he awoke. Then Thor would scoot over and give Loki room to sleep, offering his blankets and his arms as a shield from the storm.
They remembered how they used to make blanket forts in the living room when their parents went out. Rushing to put everything back before they returned.
Buying cartoon character popsicles from the ice cream truck during hot summer days. The sweet and colorful drips that made their way onto their sneakers and t-shirts. The trail of goop that followed them up the drive and onto the front porch.
Playing cops and robbers and Loki was always the robber and Thor always the cop. Cowboys and Indians and Thor was the cowboy and Loki the Indian. Knights and dragons and Loki was the dragon and Thor the knight.
Asking for a raise in their allowance so they could go to the movies and then not being able to decide which to watch. So they saw two different movies and they wouldn't talk to each other for the rest of the day.
Thor trying out for the football team while Loki watched on in the stands, cheering him on yet hoping that he wouldn't make it.
Thor becoming something their parents could boast about but when they discussed Loki, it was a little harder to explain.
"Does he make you happy?" Thor asked, looking at his brother, hoping that that will at least initiate a response.
"Who?" Loki asked.
"Anthony."
Loki quirked an eyebrow, but stared back at his brother, a smile breaking his façade of indifference.
"Indubitably."
o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o
Frigga lay in bed as she watched her husband struggle with his pajama buttons, fighting with her conscience as she was apt to do.
"What?" Odin asked once he finished.
Frigga blinked at him. Pursing her lips she said, "We ought to tell him."
Odin shook his head fiercely, struggling with his side of the bed sheets. Frigga pulled them back, rolling her eyes in exasperation. For someone who was a multi-millionaire he certainly didn't act it. Though it was not like they acted it either.
"We've been stalling far too long," Frigga told her husband.
"For good reason," Odin said, finally getting into bed. "He will only hate us."
"It will pass."
"He is not yet ready."
Frigga looked coldly at her husband. "He will never be ready in your eyes, Odin. I refuse to let my son be in the dark for the rest of his life. He is content. He has matured. We must tell him."
Odin turned off the light, hoping to end the conversation.
"And if you won't, then I will."
Author's Note: New chapter. Yay. I feel like it's super deep. It probably isn't. Yeah... So there ya go. And what are Odin and Frigga talking about? I'm sure you all can figure it out. Context clues and all that. And chose a few reviews to respond to. I would do all but as usual I will be here all day. But know I love all my readers and reviewers all the same. Because you all are awesome.
Guest: Well they're friends. I think friends should be able to notice if you suddenly change and what not.
SoraLovesRainbows: Rhodey is a sassy black woman. And I hope you enjoyed this Thor/Loki exchange. I could have gone off the deep angst end but I didn't.
BoBinthemakings: I'm glad you made an exception and I imagine it will become public eventually. Probably pretty soon. Too many people already know, so...
Sky-Oblivion: It's ok. I forgive you. Just knowing that you're reading it is good enough for me. And I'm so glad you're enjoying this series.
: Unsurprisingly, it was a very popular thing.
RoryBob: I feel like I unknowingly update on my reader's birthdays. I think I have a sixth sense. At least when it applies to birthdays. And they really shouldn't have expected it to be a secret.
Person-y Person: I added some Steve. Just for you. And thank you.
Tomazine: I knew it. And I seem to take the keyboard smashing virginity from several people. I kind of like it. And Rhodey is a photoshop genius.
Foxyperv: Both. Though mainly me. And I wanted Thor's fears to be as odd and unusual as possible. I constantly have convos with fictional characters. It's ok.
whitebengal14: I feel like we need to have a talk about responsible fan fiction reading and yet I'm deeply flattered that you didn't sleep because of irresponsible fan fiction reading. I'm so happy you found my fic and are enjoying it. And you shouldn't compliment me. My ego is enormous as it is. But thank you a million.
So... I totally have a date today and I'm seriously freaking out and it's really hard to properly do all the formatting I usually do and I've never been on a date before and this is with one of my closest friends and I'm totally having a panic attack which is totally sad cause I'm a freaking adult already. Just so everyone knows. If I die. It's because I made a complete and total ass of myself. That and I really have the urge to throw up.
Oh God. Later guys. Aardvark.
