A/N- HAPPY NEW YEAR! You guys! This is my favorite chapter and I'm so excited to share it with you. Thank you for all the love on this story, I really hope you enjoy this one. As always, thanks to my Twitter homies. I'm gonna let you get to it.
Disclaimer- I still don't own the characters, the music, Glee, or Because I Said So. The mistakes, however, are all mine.
In the short couple of hours since Rachel had volunteered to look after Katie, her mind had conjured up all of the different ways she could screw it up. While most teenage girls were babysitting to earn their money, Rachel spent that time taking extra music classes and teaching piano lessons. She was questioning her qualifications for taking care of someone else's kid. As she heard the faint sounds of Finn giving Katie some last minute instructions, she found herself panicking more. She knew how to interact with children, but did she really know how to take care of one?
Finn reminded Katie of the rules that they had already gone over twice before while Rachel looked on. He hugged her one last time and kissed her head before standing. He moved to where he was standing directly in front of Rachel. "Are you sure about this?" He said quietly.
"Of course, Finn. Don't worry about us girls, we'll be fine." She moved across the room, stopping next to Katie. "Right, Katie?"
Katie gave one sure and official nod. "Right. Don't worry daddy."
Finn looked between the two and his heart sped up. The two of them next to each other was getting to him in ways he didn't think were possible. Before he could overthink it too much, he kissed Katie again and placed a light kiss on Rachel's cheek. "Thanks again and happy birthday. Call me if she gives you any trouble." He looked over at Katie. "Be good, I love you."
"I will daddy, love you too."
He grabbed the bag he had by the door and slung it over his shoulder, placing his hand on the handle. "Kurt should be here around 9:30."
"I got it. Don't be late." Rachel said, shooing him out of the apartment. She was still scared, but she wanted to prove to herself, and Finn, that she could do it. Nothing like jumping into the deep end.
"Bye Daddy. Be safe."
Finn smiled at Katie and Rachel, "I will. Bye, have fun." He opened the door and slid out quickly, hoping to avoid letting in too much cold air. As he made his way to his subway station, he wondered how allowing Rachel to care for Katie changed their relationship; or if it did at all. He chose not to dwell on it, worried that he might overthink it.
The door closed behind Finn, leaving Rachel and Katie alone in the apartment. Rachel took a deep breath and clasped her hands in front of her, turning to face Katie. "So… What do you want to do?"
"Is it really your birthday?" She asked skeptically.
Rachel tightened the grip her hands had and smiled. "It is."
"We should have cake and ice cream. That's what we always do when it's my birthday."
"I know." Rachel peeked at the clock, though logically she knew that it was still early. She crossed the room to where she had discarded her coat when she came in. "Let's get bundled up. I know where we can get some good cake."
Katie ran to her room and came back a moment later dragging a scarf and hat while she tried to get the zipper on her coat to work. "I can do it." She proclaimed, seconds before engaging the zipper correctly and pulling it up as far as she could. Once the hat and scarf were on, she pulled a pair of gloves from her jacket pocket and put them on. "I'm all ready."
"Okay." Rachel pulled her own gloves on and grabbed her purse and the keys Finn said were for the door. Katie walked out first, waiting for Rachel as she locked the door. The two made it to the sidewalk and Rachel took a step and was startled when she felt Katie's small hand take hers. "Oh."
Katie tightened her grip on Rachel's hand and looked up at her. "We're sposed to hold hands on the side walk, specially when it's dark."
"Of course." Rachel was suddenly wondering if this was a good idea. How did she not figure out that she should hold her hand right now? She shook it off and she and the little girl continued to the bakery that Rachel had in mind. Rachel asked her a few questions about school and her friends, effectively helping to pass the time until they arrived at the bakery. By the time their cake and hot chocolate came, Katie had told Rachel all about Kindergarten.
Katie looked between the chocolate cake in front of Rachel and the cake in front of her and raised an eyebrow. "How come your cake is different than mine?"
"Mine is vegan." Rachel looked between the two cakes and noticed the different decorations, which was no doubt the reason for Katie's question. "Mine doesn't have sprinkles though." She took her fork and pierced it through the pointed end of the cake, readying her first bite.
"What does vegan mean? Does it mean that you don't get sprinkles?" Katie asked, barely getting the words out before stuffing a forkful of cake in her mouth.
Rachel giggled and sipped from her coffee cup. "Kind of. A vegan is someone who doesn't eat meat." Technically, there was far more to being a vegan and Rachel was a vegetarian. She did contemplate making the switch to veganism at one time, but she decided against it when she realized how difficult it would be. During that time, she found this place and fell in love with their vegan chocolate cake; the rich chocolate cake was just delicious no matter your diet.
"There's meat in regular chocolate cake?" Katie inspected her cake, looking for signs of meat with wide eyes.
Rachel reached across the table stilling the little girl near frantic hand. "There's no meat in it. It just means that my cake doesn't have eggs or milk in it."
"Oh." Katie looked thoughtful for a minute while she took another bite. "Don't you like eggs and milk?"
She shrugged and took a small bite of her cake. "Sometimes."
"Good. Uncle Puck says ladies that eat special foods are high mantanse. Are you high mantanse?" Unaware of the inappropriateness of her question, Katie continued eating her cake, sipping her hot chocolate innocently.
Knowing what she does about Uncle Puck, Rachel smiled and chose not to answer the question. Instead, she changed the subject. "I bet Uncle Puck doesn't even believe in princesses, huh?"
Katie's eyes went wide when Rachel mentioned the recent point of contention between her and her uncle. "He doesn't. He says they aren't real. But I know that they are real. I met one."
Rachel smiled and leaned in closer. "My friend is a princess; her name is Belle."
"You know Belle?" She asked in disbelief.
"I do." Rachel sat up and sipped her coffee before continuing. "I could get you tickets to her show, if you want." Katie nodded her head rapidly, her cake forgotten while she waited for the details. "I'll send them to your dad."
"Wow." Rachel took delight in the little girls face. She was surprised and happy and excited and it made her happy to know she had done that. "Rachel?"
Rachel smiled, "Yeah, sweetie?"
"Can I try your cake?"
She laughed and pushed the plate over to her, allowing her to take a bite. "Do you like it?" Katie nodded, chocolate ringing her lips. It wasn't too much longer before Rachel and Katie had found their way back at home, she didn't want to keep her up too late since she had school the next day. After a brief phone call with Finn, who called to check on them, Rachel had Katie changed into pajamas and head off to bed. Before she could sleep, Katie asked Rachel to read her a story and Katie was fast asleep shortly after nine.
The book she had stowed in her purse kept her company until a soft knock sounded at the door around 9:45. Rachel set her bookmark and went to the door, peeking through the peephole to see a pale man in a knit cap. From the pictures, she recognized him as Kurt and unlocked the door, allowing him in. "You must be Finn's girlfriend."
"You must be Uncle Petunia."
Kurt rolled his eyes, placing his bag down by the couch. "I can't believe they got to you too." He extended his hand to her, shaking it gently. "I'm Kurt Hummel; Finn's brother."
"Rachel Berry, Finn's…" She didn't quite know how to finish that. She wasn't his girlfriend, but she was more than a friend. This was the grey area between the two and if there was a word for it, she didn't know what it was. She let the awkwardness hang between them, choosing not to finish the sentence.
"Girlfriend." He supplied, crossing his arms in front of him.
She shook her head, adamantly denying the claim. "Not girlfriend."
"Yet."
Rachel was able to stave off the further questioning long enough for her to get home, but the question lingered in her mind. Did she want to be Finn's girlfriend? And if she did, what would that mean for Blaine? She liked them both, in wildly different ways. Blaine was a friend, they could talk about anything and she felt a connection with him, but with Finn? With Finn, it was more than that. She could talk to him too, and she definitely felt connected to him too but she also felt like there could be more between them if she would stop being scared and go for it. But was the same true for Blaine? Was there potential for more with him too and she just wasn't trying hard enough?
She really needed to figure this out, because she knew one thing: she couldn't continue to date two guys for much longer.
~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~
"Omph." As Finn's ass hit the cold ice for what had to be the fiftieth time, he inwardly hoped that no one saw him fall; again. He briefly wondered why he was here at all, he was a terrible skater, but when he looked up and saw Rachel skating towards him, it was easy to remember. Her skates expertly strode on the ice, bringing her to a stop in front of him where she reached her hand out to him, her smile blinding.
Rachel looked down at Finn, waiting for him to take her offered hand. "Come on, Finn." She and Finn were skating side by side, looping the oval ice skating rink as they talked. When she looked to her side and saw that he was no longer there. She turned back, noticing him on his butt and turned back to help him up. In the hour or so she and Finn had been here, he had spent roughly half of it sitting on the ice. She dug in her toe pick as he took her hand and lifted himself off the ice, groaning all the while.
"I don't think I have the coordination for this."
Rachel stood in front of him as he tried to find his balance again. "You can do it." Rachel took hold of both of his hands, holding steady as she started to slowly move backwards on the ice.
"Rach, what are you doing? When I fall again, I'll crush you." He followed her, mentally trying to keep upright while also making sure Rachel wasn't going to run into anybody. He was a little embarrassed at being led around the ice by the hands, but the feeling of her so close to him, more than made up for it.
"If you fall again and I'm not worried." She winked at him, cautiously navigating the turn hoping to keep him upright. "You are doing fine."
During one of the first conversations he and Rachel had, Rachel had mentioned how much she loved to go ice skating. Though Finn had only been a handful of times many years ago, he thought it might be fun to take her. He didn't realize how different their skill level would be; the first clue should have been that she owned her own skates while he had to rent some. Even with all of his falling, he didn't regret coming here. He looked down at his feet and then back to Rachel and wobbled slightly. "Right now."
"Just keep following me." It was endearing to Rachel that Finn was still on the ice with her. He fell a lot, but he got up every time. He seemed frustrated, but he just kept trying. Rachel respected that and she wanted to help. She kept her skates moving backwards, helping him stay steady while they moved. Rachel increased her speed little by little, helping Finn to gain confidence on the ice. After a loop, she moved to his side, taking hold of his hand as they slowly navigated the rink. They made it around a few more times before the cold air in their faces became too much; the knitted scarves that they were wearing were no longer proving effective. They exited the ice and found their way to an empty bench to rest on.
"You did great out there."
Finn smiled at her, stopping in front of the bench and gesturing for her to take a seat. "Only because you helped." Rachel sat and Finn lowered himself in the spot next to her, shifting to get situated. "Ow."
"What?" Rachel looked at him, alarmed. She quickly calmed when he began shaking his head.
"Nothing." He stated, shaking his head and mentally wondering if he had an actual bruise on his behind. "I think I just bruised my butt out there."
Rachel held back a laugh and reached over to rub Finn's shoulder. "Poor baby."
"Hey. I'm really tall and the ice is a long way down." Rachel laughed while Finn shifted again, alleviating the pain slightly. He looked out to the ice and then back to Rachel, who was still giggling a little. "You want to skate some more?"
Rachel surveyed the ice once more and looked at her watch. "I have time, but I think I'm done. Did you want to skate more?"
"No. I'm good." The pair changed out of their skates and adjusted their jackets, hoping to find some extra warm in them. Finn returned the skates he had rented and as they left the park, Finn took hold of Rachel's hand. He fingers wound with his, bringing emotional warmth to both of them as they walked. "You still have some time before you need to be at the theater, would you like to go back to my place for some hot chocolate?"
This was a rare afternoon for Finn. It was the weekend before Christmas and Finn's mom had made it to town last night. Carole insisted on taking Katie for the afternoon so they could see a movie and go out for some shopping. Carole made it clear that it was to be a girls day left him to make his own plans. The way she winked at him, though, led Finn to believe that this is exactly what she had intended for him to do his afternoon.
"I would like that."
They talked and laughed as they made it back to Finn's apartment hand in hand. The warm air of Finn's apartment was a welcome change to the frigid air outside. Finn went inside, shedding his coat as he made a beeline straight to the kitchen so he could start the hot chocolate while Rachel stayed in the living room to remove her coat.
"Marshmallows?" He called out from his place in the kitchen.
Rachel removed her scarf and placed it near where her coat was next to Finn's. She heard Finn but couldn't make out what he was saying. She stood behind him in the kitchen and asked him to repeat himself. "What?"
Finn turned to see Rachel standing only a couple feet behind him and his hands stilled. He stared for a moment, before shaking his head slowly. "Marshmallows. Do you want some in your hot chocolate?" Rachel smiled and nodded and he turned back to his task, stirring the hot chocolate. Even though he had spent the last couple hours with her, they had both spent that time in extra layers. Seeing her in those tight jeans and that sweater made him wonder if he would ever get used to how gorgeous Rachel was. He brought himself out of his thoughts and placed a small handful of marshmallows in each cup before handing her a cup
Rachel wrapped both hands around the hot mug, her cold hands welcoming the temperature change. "Thank you." She took the time to admire Finn. She admired the way his broad chest and shoulders were prominent in the deep red of the solid sweater and licked her lips. She felt her cheeks flush and moved the hot liquid closer to her face in hopes that the steam would help to mask her blush.
"You're welcome." Finn's lips quirked up into a half smile, highlighting the dimple on his left cheek. He brushed past her, silently inviting her to follow. He clutched his mug, making his way to the couch with Rachel close behind him.
The air suddenly thick as Rachel sat beside him on the couch. She carefully sipped from her cup, making sure not to burn herself. "You did well today."
"No I didn't; I bruised my butt." They laughed together and Finn sipped from his cup, taking in a few marshmallows in as well. "You were the pro out there." Rachel shrugged, turning away to sip her hot chocolate and hide her blush. "Don't deny it; you brought your own skates."
Rachel placed her cup on the table and turned to face him. "Those skates were a gift, Finn Hudson."
"Well…" Finn started, placing his cup next to hers. "That gift helped you skate circles around me today." He rested his elbow on the back of the couch and leaned in, his focus divided between Rachel's eyes and her lips.
The chill that Rachel had when she entered Finn's apartment was long forgotten as she leaned closer to Finn and all at once it seemed as though it was now too hot in the room. She noticed his eyes quickly glancing at her lips and she looked at his, closing the gap further. "I didn't." She whispered.
She was close enough that Finn felt her breath on his lips when she spoke and Finn leaned in further, leaving only a breath between them as he spoke again. "You did." He didn't leave her time to respond before his lips were on hers.
As their lips pressed together, a soft sigh escaped Rachel. Her sense of touch had completely taken over as she felt Finn's hand gently graze her jawline. She moved her hand to rest on his neck while his other hand wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer. She shifted, allowing herself to get closer to him on the couch. She could feel her heart beat increasing with every movement of his lips and when their tongues met for the first time, she thought it would pound out of her chest.
Finn wasn't sure how he had gone so long without kissing Rachel like this, but right now, he was making up for lost time. She was pressed against him where they sat on the couch, her small hand resting on his neck, just below his ear. He shifted slightly, hoping to adjust the position, because as close as she was, he didn't feel like it was close enough. He leaned further, pressing Rachel into the couch as he slowly rested over top of her.
She settled back while they both took a brief moment to get comfortable and catch their breath. "Are you still worried that you'll crush me?" Rachel asked, her breathing labored.
Finn sat up quickly, alarmed that he could be hurting her. "Am I?"
Rachel smiled and grabbed his shirt, pulling him back down. "It was a joke, relax. I'm fine." Her lips were back on his as soon as the words left her. As his large frame settled on top of her once again, she welcomed the intimacy that it brought. It had been so long since she had felt this way during a kiss. Even if he did crush her, which he won't, it would be worth it if his lips were on hers.
The positions shifted on the couch, allowing for each of them to have the upper hand at different times. Their kisses changed from sweet, slow pecks, to hard insistent kisses and back, making sure to get everything in between while they made out like teenagers on Finn's couch. It was becoming harder for Finn to keep his control, his hand had been on her ass for the last ten minutes and he was doing everything to keep from taking this further. He wanted to, he really wanted to, but this was only the first time they have made out and Rachel had to work soon. Rachel. Work. He pulled away, trying to talk while she peppered his face with kisses. "Rach. Rach."
"What?" She asked, not bothering to detach her lips.
"Don't you gotta…" He kissed her again, pausing mid-sentence to enjoy her taste once again. "…get to work?"
Rachel shot up, frantically searching for a clock before remembering she had a watch. "Crap. I gotta go."
Finn stood up, fighting to regain control of his body so he could help her. They clumsily put on her coat and scarf and he kissed her hastily before she walked out the door.
Finn plopped himself back down on the couch and stretched his hands behind his head and tried to regain his breath and bring his heart rate back to normal. It was probably for the best that Rachel had to be at work. He's not sure he would have been able to hold back for much longer and he wanted her. He wanted her bad. But first, he would like to officially make her his girlfriend. Though, at this point, he hoped that was just a technicality.
~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~
It was clear to Rachel when she woke up the next morning that she needed to stop seeing Blaine. She felt it yesterday when she left Finn's in a rush and it was confirmed at intermission when her lips still tingled from his touch. After the show, she laid awake kicking herself for letting herself get this involved with two men and trying to decide how to let Blaine down gently. She figured that the best thing she could do was be honest with him, so she called him as soon as she could the next morning and asked that he come over so they could talk.
She was just putting the last of her morning dishes away when her doorbell rang, signaling Blaine's arrival. She wiped her hands on her dish towel and straightened her shirt trying to steady her nerves. She had never broken up with anyone before, if you could even count this as a break up. She stood with her hand on the handle of the door and took in a deep breath, letting it out slowly as she opened it. "Blaine. Thank you for coming. Please come in." Rachel moved out of the way, allowing him in while her hand held tight to the handle.
"Rachel. Thanks for calling."
Rachel closed the door and waited for Blaine to hang his coat before gesturing for him to sit. "Can I get you anything? Are you thirsty?"
"I'm fine." Blaine sat and nervously wiped the palm of his hands on his pants.
The fact that Blaine was acting nervous only made Rachel more nervous as she sat across from him in her living room. He kept wiping his hands on his pants and he won't look at her and its making her uneasy. She's trying to figure out why he could be nervous… unless he wants to break up with her. Honestly, that would help Rachel to feel better about what she was doing. She and Blaine were great together, as friends. Rachel couldn't deny that and she didn't want to. Blaine was a great guy and they had a lot in common, just because she didn't want to date him, didn't mean she didn't want to see him at all. She hoped he understood.
"Blaine…" She wasn't sure if she should start with small talk or just get to it. She watched him take in a deep breath of his own as if he was getting ready for her to say it. That's when she decided to end his misery. "I can't be your girlfriend."
"I'm gay."
"I think you're great and I would like to be your fr…" It was at that moment that Blaine's words met her ears. "What?"
Blaine sat up, leaning closer to Rachel, no longer nervous. The words were out and he felt more like himself that he ever did before. "I'm gay. I'm sorry to tell you like this and I'm sorry if I hurt you, but I heard what you said at your party about doing what makes me happy. You were right. I can't continue to live for my dad; I need to live for me."
"Blaine…" Tears began to fill Rachel's eyes as she saw the change in Blaine immediately. He was liberated and it looked good on him. It also explained so much about their relationship. They got along so well, yet he never made a move on her. They didn't hold hands or kiss, they linked elbows and hugged. Their relationship has always been platonic and Rachel was just now realizing it. Now that she wasn't blinded by her fathers and the pressure to make it work. "I'm so proud of you."
Blaine noticeable relaxed and moved to sit next to her on the couch. "You're not upset?"
"No. I'm happy for you."
"Really?"
Rachel nodded and turned a little so she could face him better. "Of course. In case you missed it, I brought you over here to break up with you." They both laughed through their misty eyes and Rachel chose to tell him everything. "About the same time I met you, I met another guy. I have been dating you both since then, but last night." Rachel was unable to keep the smile while she recalled the memory. "Last night, I knew for sure that he is the one I want to be with. I'm so sorry."
"Don't be." He shook his head and smiled, genuinely happy for his friend. "I'm a little surprised that your dads would pick two of us, but I guess I understand giving you options."
Rachel tilted her head in confusion. "My dads? What do they have to do you and Finn?"
He knew he shouldn't but that didn't stop him from telling her anyway. She deserved to know. "Your dads put out a personal ad looking for someone for you. They interviewed some people, including me, and they set it up so we could meet and you wouldn't know."
"Your VIP ticket…"
Blaine looked away sheepishly as her mind connected the dots. "I'm really sorry."
Rachel was beyond angry as her mind sorted out the details of the last month. She had a million questions, most of which were for her fathers and Finn, but Blaine was the only one here right now. "Why did you answer the ad if you are gay?"
"My dad. He wants me to settle down and find a nice girl. You know, white picket fence and all that. He just doesn't understand and I thought this would be easier. When I saw that two men were looking for someone for their daughter, I knew that they- and possibly you- would be accepting if I ever figured myself out. I assure you that I didn't want to hurt you. You are great, so great that you got me to realize that I am worthy of my own happiness and not just my dad's. You did that. But I am sorry if I hurt you, that was never my intention."
She softened a little listening to him. She could understand why he did it and she appreciated him talking to her about it now, before it got too real; for her anyway. "Thank you. I think I understand. I think things will be clearer after I speak to my fathers."
"Thank you for listening." Blaine stood, moving to where his coat was hung up. He put his arms through the sleeves and buttoned it up. Rachel opened the door and allowed him to exit into the hallway.
"Thank you. I hope you'll continue to call me; as friends." She leaned out of the doorway, keeping her foot extended behind her, and she reached out to him, taking hold of his elbow. Being careful not to get locked out, she placed a lingering kiss on his cheek. "I hope you find your happiness."
Blaine smiled and mouthed a thank you to her before turning to the elevator.
Finn was pissed. How could she? He left Katie with his mom so that he could go talk to Rachel and, hopefully, make things official with her. He waited until late morning, knowing she wouldn't be up until then; he even picked up flowers on the way, in hopes of surprising her. Instead, he was the one who was surprised. When he got off the elevator he saw Rachel affectionately saying goodbye to another man. She was touching his arm and kissing him right there in the hallway. Knowing that Rachel is usually just getting up about now, it appeared that this guy had spent the night. If he didn't know better, he would swear it was one of the guys her dads interviewed, Brain or something. Instead of waiting around for the humiliation, he entered the stairwell and stomped down all six flights. He walked through the lobby, kicking a chair as he passed by and sending it several feet from its usual location. The flowers he bought were angrily thrown in the trash can on the street as continued stomping down the sidewalk and eventually, home.
A/N- Well? Did you call it? Poor Finn is mad as hell and as usual a poor defenseless chair gets hurt. Next chapter should be up Monday or before! Love you guys and your non-hateful reviews. Much love.
