It was a tired, bedraggled group that sat around the campfire one last time that night. No-one spoke; the peacefulness surrounding them was almost tangible and no one wanted to disturb it. Maya and Riley sat side by side, smiling at each other, for the moment or at least for that night the tension forgotten. Pappy Joe broke the silence a few minutes later regalingthem with stories of Lucas' childhood and growing up in Texas. The others listened with rapt attention, hungry for any information on Lucas as a boy. When the stories were finished and the fire a pile of glowing embers, they all shuffled off to bed, all too tired for further conversation. Even Maya with all the conflicting thoughts rattling in her brain fell asleep the instant her head hit the pillow. The next morning was a flurry of activity as baggage was loaded into the truck, tickets were checked and sleepy eyes wiped over a breakfast fit for Texan bellies. The 2 hour plus flight to New York was an uneventful one as they hadn't all been able to get seats together. Riley and Maya talked casually about nothing in particular until they landed and saw Cory and Topanga waving at them.
"Hi girls, how was your trip?" Cory said giving Maya a hug as Riley hugged Topanga.
"It was – um, fun?"
Cory and Topanga exchanged glances at each other at the uncertainty in their daughter's voice, neither missing the upward lift at the end of her sentence, implying doubt behind her words. With a raised eyebrow Cory glanced down at Riley who had now come to give him a hug.
"Do we want to know?" he asked gently. He knew without a doubt Riley would tell them when she was ready. She always shared with them, kept them a part of her life, of her growth.
"Maya likes Lucas," she stated simply. Cory and Topanga looked at each other again, this time in surprise. They hadn't expected this.
"So what happened?" Topanga now asked.
"Riley told him and now things are different," Maya replied. She and Riley hadn't really talked about all that had happened; Maya still wasn't ready to have her suspicions confirmed so the two had skirted the topic with great care.
"Feelings do make things different but we still have to feel them, it's a part of growing up," Cory said.
"Cut it out Matthews, no lessons it's still weekend," Maya complained.
"Sorry Maya, I'm a teacher it's what I do," he retorted.
Maya rolled her eyes and Cory laughed at his rebel student.
"How about some ice-cream? Will that make the lesson easier to swallow?' he asked. He was rewarded with serene smiles of agreement and the family with its extended member headed to Topanga's for ice-cream.
They were sitting in the bay window, arms crossed and legs stretched out hesitation obvious on their faces. Neither one wanted to bring up the subject of all that had happened yet both knowing they needed to. Maya wanted to hold on to false hope just a little bit longer and Riley for one selfish moment didn't want to expose how close Maya was to getting what she wanted. One selfish moment, that was all she allowed herself for in the next second she realized she couldn't hurt her best friend like that; in her mind Maya was probably beating herself up over liking the same boy her best friend did and hurting too, thinking she didn't stand a chance. Riley couldn't let her keep hurting like that, it wasn't in her nature.
"Peaches?"
"Yes Riles?" Maya said, looking across at her friend.
"I'm sorry for telling your secret like that," she smiled, a small sad smile. "I knew you would never tell him and it was hurting you keeping it in like that but it was still wrong of me and I'm sorry," she finished.
"It's OK, Riley, I'm not upset, I was then but you're right, it needed to be said and I wouldn't have but I know he chose you and I can deal with it, it will be hard but I'll get through it as long as you're happy, I shouldn't ha-,"
"Lucas likes you, Maya," Riley cut in.
Maya blinked for a second but went on as though she hadn't heard.
"I shouldn't have tried to come between you, of course he likes you, it's always been you," she hurriedly said.
"Maya you're not listening, he didn't pick me he chose you, he likes you."
"No Riles, he likes you, I saw him hug you and he-."
"Maya," Riley said loudly, reaching over to grab Maya's shoulders and gently shaking her. "You're not listening, he likes you, he told me so himself," Riley said smiling at her friend waiting for her to comprehend her words.
Maya froze and stared back but then shook her head again.
"There's no way, he was probably just saying it to put it off, he knew you'd handle it better and didn't want to ruin the rest of the trip, yeah that's it, he's always liked you, he just think I'm a bully," she railed at her friend, suddenly feeling frantic to make her friend understand.
'No Maya, he talked to me, he hugged me as a friend, I know this, why don't you?" she replied vehemently, now that she had come to terms with her first love not loving her back, it was equally as important to her that her best friend be happy, that Maya understand Lucas' true feelings.
Maya shook her head and stood up, Riley wasn't listening and she could no longer stand to hear the lies that her friend seemed to believe as truth.
"I need to go, Riley I'll see you tomorrow for school," she said and climbed out the window, not giving Riley a spare moment to stop her. Riley watched her go and sat back, defeated. What now? If Maya wouldn't believe her, maybe she'd believe Lucas. She'd talk to him tomorrow and tell him he needed to make his intentions clear to Maya or neither of them would ever be happy. Decision made she went to join her family.
Maya felt like she was on a cloud and not in the blissfully happy cloud 9 kind of way, she felt like there the was only fluffy air beneath her, nothing concrete and nothing safe. She'd spent the night in a restless in-between zone, not awake not asleep and had spent the day avoiding her friends as much as possible (considering they had the same classes), preparing herself for the big talk she knew she had to have after school. She'd seen glimpses of her friends here and there throughout the day and shied away each time at the concern she saw on their faces. At one point she'd seen Riley in deep conversation with Lucas even saw Lucas get angry at one point but she'd told Riley she could handle it and she would. Running away and avoiding it entirely was handling it, right? The bell rang signaling the end of school and the haunting echo of the bell sounded in her ears long after the crowd of children made their mass exit. When the halls cleared; Maya was standing by their bench and saw her friends waiting with her. It was an unspoken thing, they were all so in sync with each other or was it just that the buildup of tension since Texas had to be relieved somewhere and everyone just knew it would be that day, here, now? She saw Riley and Lucas standing next to each other and Zay and Farkle off to the side, both looking utterly clueless as to what was going on but willing to be there for their friends anyway. Lucas was watching her, an unreadable emotion on his face. Riley was holding on to his arm but swiftly dropped her hand upon seeing Maya. Maya noticed it all but only vaguely, out of her peripheral vision; she couldn't seem to drag her eyes away from the blue green ones of Lucas. Riley stepped away and motioned to Farkle and Zay who followed her out the front entrance of the school leaving Maya and Lucas completely alone. Alone, Maya dropped her gaze, she'd been wrong she couldn't handle it, couldn't bear it. Maybe she'd ask her mom to move, then she wouldn't have to face the reality of the boy she liked being with another girl. No, she roughly dismissed that idea in the mental argument she was having with herself. She'd never leave Riley; ring power would never allow it even if she tried. She felt fingers on her face and jerked back to the present, away from her thoughts. Lucas was in front of her, his fingers lightly touching her cheek, an expression on his face she could not see in her blind vehemence to do the honorable thing.
"Lucas, I need to tell you something," she said softly, horrifyingly close to tears.
"I need to tell you something too, Maya," he said just as softly, almost tenderly. He was not blind to facial expressions, in fact, now that he had talked to Riley and it was all out in the open save for the one that mattered, his mind was clear, so clear he could see the pain and fear that Maya was trying so hard to hide. It made him want to hug her, to pull her into the safety of his arms where nothing or no one would ever be able to hurt her. But he made himself wait, it could wait.
"Me first, Huckleberry," Maya valiantly threw in; needing some last grasp on familiarity, hoping the jaunt would give her bravery.
"OK," he replied, smiling slightly. He didn't think Maya was aware, standing so close to each other as they were that he could read all her feelings on her face. Knowing her, she would hate that idea but he enjoyed the rare show of her inner emotions, Maya didn't often let them see her.
"I know you've talked to Riley but I don't know if she would have said anything but what she told you is a lie, Lucas, Riley doesn't see you as a brother, she still likes you a lot and I don't know why she thinks I do but she was wrong about that, of course I like you, Lucas, as a friend but that's all it is, so now you know, now you can be with Riley and you don't have to worry about hurting me because it's not like that anymore," Maya gushed out, afraid if she talked slowly she'd change her mind and spill her real secrets, the truth. She finally looked up at Lucas and saw utter shock spread over his features as evident to her as if they'd been written in block letters on his face. He hadn't known, whatever Riley had talked to him about it hadn't been that. She knew he was shocked to find out that Riley still liked to him but the shock wouldn't last, he would go, soon she assumed, to claim Riley as his girlfriend, finally making the step they hadn't gotten to the last time.
"Maya-," Lucas started.
"No Lucas it's OK, go, be with Riley, we both know that's who it always would have been," she smiled as she ushered him towards the door. Not quite understanding what was happening, she managed to move him but then he dug in his heels and wouldn't budge. Maya didn't like him anymore? According to Riley she did and would Riley really be wrong about something like that? He'd even gotten angry with Riley for talking to Maya before he could but had it all been for nothing? Wasn't it more realistic that Maya was stepping back once again? Could he risk being wrong about that, declare his feelings and have her genuinely laugh in his face? Doubt and misgivings crept in as he stood, breathing hard watching her.
Equally as confused as to why he was still standing there looking like his heart was breaking; Maya decided it was time to go. "I'm going home, Lucas, I'll see you tomorrow," she said and left.
Lucas stood watching her go, absolutely dumbfounded. He reached up and rubbed the back of his neck.
"Wait, what?' were his final words of total confusion before he too left to go home and ponder what had just happened.
