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Steve had been the first one to lose his mind and move into Stark Tower. At least he was pretty sure he'd lost his mind.
Over the past month, Steve had been gradually caving toward Tony's frequent requests about living together. In the end, the loneliness of living by himself in a strange new world had given him the final push. The actual move wasn't difficult, especially considering Steve didn't have very many possessions. But on his first evening in his new home, it occurred to Steve that he had just put himself in what was probably the most technologically advanced building in New York City. All he wanted was a cup of coffee and even that couldn't be simple.
Steve didn't drink coffee the way others on his team – especially Tony – did, near constantly. Once a day and he was pretty much set. The caffeine did nothing for him, thanks to the serum, and Steve hadn't found any coffee that tasted fabulous enough he had to have it all day long. Tony had insisted he'd found the perfect coffee maker for such a situation. Steve hoped that was what he was looking at, because otherwise he didn't have any idea what the thing did.
"'All you have to do is push a button,' he says," Steve muttered to himself. He had no idea where the coffee was, either, but that was okay, because he couldn't fathom where it was going to go. There was water, but no filter, and the display kept flashing different shapes and sizes of cups at him. There was a strange word on the front, which matched boxes with pictures of coffee on the front – but all that was inside the boxes was tiny plastic cups.
Steve's first thought was that he didn't really want the coffee after all; it wasn't worth the effort. But he knew if he was going to be a part of this world, he couldn't run from its gadgets forever. "Jarvis?" He still found the computer disarming, but it was better than going to Tony.
"Yes, sir?"
"How does this thing work?" Steve played with a lever on the front and a compartment popped open. "And you're going to need to be a little more descriptive than 'press a button.'"
"So how's Steve settling in?" Pepper asked as she walked into Tony's lab.
"Great, as far as I know," Tony said. "I was going to go check on him later. I haven't heard from him."
Pepper smiled. "That doesn't mean he doesn't need help."
"Maybe," Tony allowed, "but it does mean he hasn't blown anything up."
Pepper laughed at that. "Of the two of you, who do you think is honestly more likely to cause an explosion?"
She had him there. "Okay, fine, I'll check on him. Just let me finish this simulation." He reached out with one arm, beckoning Pepper closer so he could hook his arm around her waist. "If my calculations are correct – and they probably are – I may have just improved upon SHIELD's theory surrounding Hulk-proof glass." Bruce had returned to Eastern Europe, but Tony had at least got him to consider relocating to New York. Apparently, Sofia, Bulgaria had been a good middle ground between New York City and Calcutta.
"Interesting." Pepper watched the computer screen as a small, animated Hulk rampaged, leaving only a crack on the surrounding area. Tony had programmed that into the simulation simply to amuse himself. "What's with the skintight purple pants?"
"Really, is that all you noticed?" Tony asked. "Women and fashion, sheesh. Anyhow, as you can see, I've nearly perfected this. And, since you asked, the purple is for fun."
Pepper nuzzled Tony's neck for a minute before reminding him, "You still need to check on Steve."
"Oh, fine." Tony wanted to take her snuggling a step further – they still had time before dinner – but he knew he had to take care of Steve before that would happen. Pepper was such a mother hen. And, honestly, Tony did want to keep an eye on Steve. He just had to pretend it was Pepper's idea to maintain his facade of ambivalence. "With any luck, I'll stop him before he tries to load a DVD into the Keurig."
"You gave him a Keurig?" Pepper asked.
Tony wasn't planning to insulate Steve from modern amenities forever. "Yes. He only ever drinks one cup at a time anyhow. I don't know how he functions, honestly, but whatever. I left him all the pieces. Cups, sugar, Coffeemate...he'll figure it out."
Pepper rolled her eyes. "You know, it's not nice to leave him without instructions just for your amusement as he messes with things."
"Relax, it's not like I'm videotaping him." Tony headed for the elevator, Pepper following. "It'll do him good to piece things together. Builds confidence. Besides, I couldn't video it even if I wanted to. We agreed not to use Jarvis to spy on each other, remember?" They had to have some ground rules, after all.
"That shouldn't have to even be a rule, you know," Pepper pointed out, "but knowing you..."
When they arrived on the fifty-third floor, where Steve had set up residence, he had seemed to figure out the coffee maker, but he was eying the Coffeemate container warily.
"It's not going to bite you," Tony promised.
Steve took a sip from the mug in his hand, making a face. "This powdered milk tastes funny."
"Well, that would make sense, considering it's not actually milk," Tony told him. "Not even dairy, actually."
"Oh." Steve looked like he wasn't sure what to think.
Tony had mercy on him. "Here, let me officially show you around." He glanced at Pepper, who nodded approvingly. It would fill the time before they had dinner together, but he would be able to find time with Pepper after. Plus it reduced the odds that Steve would call him for help at an inconvenient time.
And somewhere down deep, Tony was beginning to acknowledge that he actually wanted to help Steve figure this world out.
Steve looked out the window of Sharon's car and up at the Baxter Building before they pulled into the garage. "This week is just full of bad ideas."
Sharon grinned. "Hey, you can stay in the car if you want. I'm only going to be a few minutes, but I thought you wanted to meet my infamous clientele." She had told Steve quite a few stories of the Fantastic Four, and between that and Tony's insistence that Steve had to meet Johnny Storm "to see if it causes a paradox," Steve had gotten curious. He happened to be having lunch with Sharon when she mentioned she needed to go back to work to pick up her spare laptop. She told them when she called she was with a friend.
"Well, I do, but are you sure they aren't going to mind?" Steve asked.
"Mind?" Sharon laughed. "Steve, you're Captain America. They want to meet you." She parked the car and was met by a robot. It was kind of a cute robot, Steve thought. Sharon didn't bat an eye. "Hi, H.E.R.B.I.E."
"Ms. Carter. I'll tell Dr. Richards you've arrived."
Steve watched in the direction the robot was speeding off. "It's name is Herbie?"
"Yeah, he's practically the family pet. It's short for Humanoid Experimental Robot, B-type," Sharon explained. "I told you, Reed Richards and Tony Stark spent a long time vying for the position of most eccentric genius in New York. I'm not sure the race is off yet. Trust me, since I've been Dr. Richards' admin assistant, I've seen some strange things."
"I don't doubt it." Steve chuckled. "Do they know...?"
"Who I work for?" Sharon guessed. Steve nodded. "Officially, not so much, but I'm pretty sure they've figured it out. They don't say anything, though, and so I pretend I don't know they know. It all works out. They know about SHIELD. Anyone with known superpowers does, unless SHIELD has some reason for them not to."
"Guess it's good to know you're being watched," Steve reasoned. He was still a little uncomfortable with the concept, but he understood the need for such an organization.
A smiling blonde woman met them in the lobby as they stepped off the elevator. "Sharon!" She immediately extended a hand to Steve. "Captain Rogers. It's an honor to meet you. I'm Sue Richards."
Steve smiled "It's a pleasure, ma'am."
Sue looked at Sharon, her expression amused. "Stark wasn't kidding about the resemblance. I'd seen the news clips, but it's really something."
"I know," Sharon said. "They say everyone has a twin, I guess. Is Johnny here?"
Sue shook her head. "No, you just missed him. I chased him out of here after he tried to make grilled cheese in the living room again." She rolled her eyes. "The kitchen is ten steps away...honestly. You know I love my brother, but he's...well, he's just Johnny." Sharon had mentioned that Sue had pretty much raised her brother, and she certainly seemed maternal, even when complaining about him.
After meeting the rest of the team, Steve could certainly see why Sharon was fond of but entertained by them. Reed Richards was a perfect fit for the part of mad scientist, socially awkward but with a good heart. Ben Grimm was kind and his Lower East Side accent suited him perfectly. They'd all seemed honestly delighted to meet Steve, and though he wasn't entirely unfamiliar with fame, he found it charming.
"So, what'd you think?" Sharon asked as they settled back into her car.
Steve gave her his immediate first impression. "They're good people. I can see how they wanted to back out of the spotlight and just be themselves."
Sharon nodded. "I really don't blame them. I know Ben and Johnny are itching to get back into the action, but if there's one thing being at SHIELD has taught me, the time will come. I keep telling them to enjoy it while it lasts. There are still things out there, and one day, we're going to need all the superheroes we can get."
Steve wondered if she actually knew about something or was speaking metaphorically, and he was just about to ask when Sharon's phone rang.
Sharon tapped her wireless headset. "Sharon Carter." She smiled. "Oh, hi, Director. I just left, actually. I'll print out the file tonight and it'll be on your desk in the morning." She bit her lip after a moment, the way she did when she was trying to keep from laughing. "I'll make sure to make copies at my place. Okay. Carter out." She tapped the headset again and burst into laughter. "Oh, God, I love my boss."
"What's so funny?" Steve asked.
Sharon had managed to calm herself to a mild case of the giggles. "He's positively phobic about the copiers at the Baxter Building. Ever since..." Her eyes lit up. "Oh, I didn't tell you about this one. Ben got word that he'd come into a lot of money, and between that thought and the next, he decided to photocopy his ass and send it to Bill Gates – he's a big name computer guy. Director Fury happened to walk in at the wrong moment, and...he won't touch the copiers since."
It was so absurd Steve nearly didn't believe it...but some things couldn't be made up. It was hard to imagine a man made of rock even managing such a feat. "I don't even want to know what that must have looked like."
"A lot like the Grand Canyon, I'm told." Sharon dissolved into helpless giggles again. It occurred to Steve that this was the first time she'd honestly laughed since Peggy died. It was the first time he'd laughed – and as poignant as it was, Steve knew it was a good sign. She would have wanted them to be happy.
They were moving in the right direction.
Coming soon – Bruce concludes that the Avengers require adult supervision, Thor returns from a visit with Jane, and flight is apparently not one of Captain America's super powers.
Oh, and the incident with the copier was drafted from one of JMS' runs on Fantastic Four. I really, truly could not help myself. If he and Joss did anything together in the Avengers universe, it would explode from awesome.
