"Unhand my master!"
Much turned revolted eyes from Robin and Constance, focusing on an enraged Marian.
"Marian," he asked, "is 'unhand' the word I want? What is it called when you want someone to stop kissing? 'Unlip?' "
"You tell them to stop," Marian huffed, jealously eyeing Constance.
"Oh, surely not! Is that all? Surely there must be a better way to express it! Even 'cease and desist' is better than 'stop.' Really, Marian! I'd have thought you, of all people, would do better than come up with a mere 'stop.' "
"Shut up, Outlaw!" Constance was unused to having people charge in on her, and to say she welcomed the interruption would be a lie. She had resigned herself to having to 'entertain' the outlaw leader, and was just beginning to appreciate his merits and finer qualities, when the door had sprung open, emitting this babbling idiot and his undeniably beautiful friend. How dare they barge in here and ruin things with their chatter and arguments over words?
"Your Majesty," Robin was addressing Constance respectfully, "May I present my friend Much? And this," he continued, his face and voice glowing with pride, "is Lady Marian."
"Your Majesty?" Much sputtered.
"Yeah, he thinks I'm the bloomin' Queen Mum. He's dotty."
"Poor dear!" Marian gently took Robin's arm and eased him onto a seat. "Robin, how are you feeling?"
"You look ravishing," he told Marian, adoration and love oozing from his voice and eyes. "When am I ever going to get to ravish you?"
"What?"
"Master! Unbelievable! Where are your manners?"
Constance sniggered. "What are you waiting for, dearie? There's plenty what'll do it if you're unwilling." Flipping a small towel over her shoulder, she said, "I'll be off, now. Allan said I only had to keep him here till his friends arrived. Goodbye." She bent and gave Robin a kiss. "'Bye, Sweetie." Shooting Marian a derogatory look, she flounced out the door.
"She is revolting!" Much proclaimed.
"Queen Eleanor is a remarkable woman, Much," Robin tried to explain. "She seems to grow younger with each passing year. Just like Merlin."
Much couldn't make sense of Robin's addled state of mind. "Well, yes...and I'm King Arthur!" he muttered sarcastically.
"Your Majesty!" Robin reverently bowed on one knee.
"Help me lead him out of here," Marian suggested.
Much was full of objections. "But Marian, we can't just pull his hood up over his head and sneak him down the stairs and out the door, past hundreds of guards!"
"There aren't nearly that many," she argued. "Just a handful...or a dozen at the most. Come on, Much, he needs care. You heard the dribble he's spouting."
"It never was dribble, Marian," Robin sighed. "I meant every word. You really can see into my soul!"
"Please!" Much exploded.
Robin rose and dashed to the window. Thrusting his head out, he shouted, "Robin of Locklsey loves Lady Marian!"
"Much, help me drag him back in here!"
Much helped Marian pull a grinning Robin back into the room. The three of them fell together in a mass in the center of the room.
"I love you, Marian," Robin said, lying sprawled out on the floor. "Have I ever told you?"
"We have got to get him back to the forest," Marian insisted.
"Well, that may very well be," Much conceded, "I still say we should just sit tight and wait for Robin to return to his senses. Once he does, he'll think up a sure way to get us out of here."
Marian stared at Much.
"What?" he asked.
"Robin isn't the only one who can think up plans, you know," Marian insisted, brushing away Robin's kissing lips from her hair. "Behave!" she told Robin firmly. "Now is not the time!"
"Oh," Much declared with an air of vast superiority, "as if your plans are so wise!"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I'm not saying anything! I'm not saying anything!"
Marian waited for Much's upcoming outburst. She didn't have long to wait.
"What about the time you dressed up as the Nightwatchman and tried to steal Gisbourne's money? What about that plan, Marian, oi? Oh, that was brilliant! If that's the sort of plan you propose, then count me out!"
"I refuse to wait about here for Robin to regain his senses!" Marian cried. "We need to take action, Much!"
"We need to take action, Much!" Robin repeated, sitting up. "Now, Much, you go downstairs and buy yourself something to eat and drink, and Marian and I will take action." Robin grinned his most devilish smile, and seized Marian, amorously pulling her on top of him.
"Looks like 'Queen Eleanor' really warmed him up for you, Marian," Much couldn't resist saying.
"Stop it, both of you!" She pushed Robin away and sat up, straightening her hair.
Both men had the decency to look abashed.
"Now," Marian continued. "I have a plan. I'll dress up as a tavern wench and-"
She froze in midsentence.
"Marian?" Much asked. "What is it?"
"Shh!" she whispered. "I think I hear Gisbourne downstairs."
