20/06/2011-29/07/2011
Tokyo Babylon/X-1999 don't belong to me. I am just borrowing their characters for a while to play with.
Snapped?
By Zuzanny
lionette AT mailcity DOT com
part 7
Subaru kept walking barefoot down the cold, pea-green, lino covered hallway, expecting to be stopped and questioned at any moment. But he wasn't. He passed a few people carrying bouquets of flowers heading in the opposite direction to him, nodding to each other in passing.
No one even questioned his lack of shoes.
Even without rushing, it took less than a minute before Subaru was exiting through the automatic doors and outside, and down the cement steps leading towards the car park. At the base of the steps he did pause briefly, just in case someone did suddenly decide to question him, but even then no one did. So he shrugged and casually wandered over to the bus stop, where there were a bunch of patients smoking while sitting in their wheel chairs or standing beside their running IV poles. Some of them even had oxygen tanks running at the time, which made Subaru's eye brow rise briefly. He slipped his hands into his flimsy hospital pajama pockets and leaned back against the edge of the bus shelter, enjoying the feel of the sunlight streaming down his face, and inhaling the smoke gathering there. He considered asking for a smoke, but the brand he liked was not one being consumed there, so with a sigh he casually turned away and continued to walk away from the hospital.
As he walked, he closed his eyes, enjoying the sun on his skin and listening to the passing cars and the kids in a nearby school as they laughed and played. He opened his eyes again as he reached a street corner, and paused, trying to decide which direction to take- considering how long it had been since he had actually walked around the city (or how different this version of this city would be),
It really should not have been much of a surprise then that he soon found himself in The Park standing before the great twisted trunk of The Tree he had first met Seishirou under all those years before. It's wide reaching and dangling branches were filled with pink blossoms, unlike the others it shared the park space with. Not for the first time Subaru snorted to himself as he pondered why so few people were more than fleetingly curious as to why This tree had pink blossoms all year round while none of the others around it did... But then... people were like that with everything really.
Subaru closed his eyes while he stood with tips of cherry blossoms dangling about his shoulders, and listened to the sounds of the branches being shifted in the slight breeze, inhaling the scent of those blossoms, and trying to reach out with his other senses...
Trying...
Trying...
Trying...
But it was still too soon.
"I thought I'd find you here." Seishirou's gentle rumble from behind him made Subaru spin with fright. But that only lasted a second. Subaru found it strange in a sort of unattached way that the fear of Seishirou didn't seem to last very long at all. Seishirou stood on the grass about half way between the pathway and the tree, hand in the pockets of his long grey jacket, amused turn to his lips. "Not trying to purify the tree again, I hope."
"No," Subaru said whistfully, turning back to look up into the tree's branches. Seishirou's clothed gently swished while he walked up to stand behind Subaru. "I can't even feel her anyway. The drugs haven't worn off yet."
"Drugs?" There was a strange tone to Seishirou's voice that made Subaru turn his head back over his shoulder to look up at the man.
"Yes," He answered. "from the hospital. They always make me feel... fuzzy."
Seishirou snorted. "And here Hokuto was running around telling everyone you were possessed."
Subaru's mouth also twitched slightly with that, but he said nothing, instead looking back up into the tree's branches as though the answers to all life's questions could be found there.
He was startled when Seishirou's arms wrapped solidly around his own chest and arms, and drew him snugly against Seishirou's body. "Seishirou-san!" Subaru gasped out his complaint and started to pull away.
"Shhhh..." Seishirou breathed into Subaru's ear- which had Subaur's hair standing on end- and held on tighter. "Relax," Seishirou continued, caressing Subaru's ear with his mouth. "I'm not going to hurt you. Trust me."
That was perhaps not the best thing to have said. Subaru stopped trying to pull away, but instead stood rigid and tense, trembling even. "How can I trust you after all you've done to me?" His voice crackled with emotion.
Seishirou settled his chin on Subaru's shoulder. "Tell me what I have done. No, don't pull away from me. TELL ME."
Subaru didn't even know where to begin. "What haven't you done to me?"
"I can think of a few things." Seishirou's voice purred, dripping with sweet sweet poison. "I can think of quite a few things I have not done to you. So, tell me what I HAVE done to you that would make you so angry with me."
"I... It's not fair!" Subaru's thoughts swirled around in his head, memories mixing. "There is just so much! I hate all the lies. I thought..." He tried to gather his thoughts together. "I don't understand why you did it all. I just don't understand!"
"What did I do?" Seishirou prodded again.
"Why did you have to lie? Why did you... tear my heart out like you did? You spent a year telling me you loved me, and I believed you, I really did. I even realised that I wanted to love you too, but then suddenly I was nothing to you and you killed Hokuto so easily. We were nothing to you. I was nothing to you, just a THING to play with for a while until you got bored. Then after all these years of you being gone from my life you come back only to kill yourself instead of me, and tell me you really loved me all along! What the HELL?All these years I blamed myself for Hokuto's death, and how I obviously was so worthless that even my family wished I had died instead, because she would have NEVER fallen so easily in love with an evil psychopath and shamed The Family the way I have... For what? To find out Hokuto really commit suicide that night to cast a spell on you so you could commit suicide on my hand? If you really loved me, why did you do all those things? What did I do you make you want to ruin my life like that? It's not fair! It's... a waste! It's a waste and I hate it! I want to hate you but I can't. Why can't I hate you like I want to?" Subaru yelled the last into the air, panting heavily afterwards.
Seishirou was quite for some moments before he spoke. "You did nothing wrong." His voice was low, a gentle growl. "You didn't deserve to be treated like that." He hugged tighter. "I... I want to kill the bastard who did this to you." It was a dangerous hiss.
"I can still feel your blood on my hand." Subaru said too calmly. "It doesn't matter how much I wash or scrub..." He lifted his arms up at the elbow to stare at this ungloved fingers.
Seishirou suddenly tensed. "What?"
"I can still feel your... heart... as my hand went through you. Beating. Beating. I had no idea people could be so warm... on the inside..." And it was like all the strength had been sucked out of him as Subaru curled over and started to sob loudly. Seishirou gently lowered them both to the ground. Subaru covered his face in his hands and sobbed and sobbed and shook in Seishirou's arms while Seishirou gently rocked him and cooed into his ear.
"Death is too good for that bastard." Seishirou muttered to himself, thinking about possible scenarios and the ramifications. Then he suddenly turned Subaru to face him, pulling the hands away from the tear stained face. "Did you want to kill him, er, me?" He asked urgently, peering deep into Subaru's reddened eyes.
"NO!" Subaru jirked like he had been struck across the face.
"Did you initiate the killing strike?"
Subaru shook his head in confusion and again started to pull away. "I don't see why-"
"This is important!" Seishirou gave him a bit of a shake to keep his attention. "Did you at any time actively try and kill me?"
"Of course not!" Subaru snapped. "You were the one supposed to kill me! That's what I wanted! That's what I expected." Seishirou felt like ice had just been tossed down his back at the thought of an apparently suicidal Subaru. "It was only Hokuto's stupid spell that stopped you from killing me." Subaru continued. "It swapped our positions, or something, so you ended up dead instead!"
Seishirou lowered his head to press against Subaru's forehead with his own and sighed with relief.
"I don't think I could kill you even if I wanted to." Subaru added gently, leaning into the forehead touch.
"You wouldn't be Subaru otherwise." They spent a few heart beats with their heads pressed together before Seishirou pulled away and stood, pulling Subaru to his feet. "Come over here." He dragged Subaru closer to The Tree so they were right next to the the trunk. "My mother once told me that the Sakurazakimori were cursed. We are killed by those we love the most, and then they are cursed to become the next Sakurazakimori."
Subaru's eyes widened with horror stared back at his hands before he looked back into Seishirou's eyes.
"Yesss..." Seishirou said seriously, slowly nodding his head. But then he raised his voice as though he was talking to a crowd of people. "However! I have always maintained that this curse will end with me as I can not possibly love you more than I love myself!" Subaru was obviously very confused by the expression on his face, but Seishirou continued speaking loudly. "And as I AM The Sakurazakimori, I declare that this other Seishirou is obviously the same, and by choosing to commit suicide he has continued to pass this mantle onto himself!"
There was a loud rumbling sound in the air, like thunder, but looking around Subaru saw that the sky was completely blue, there were not even any clouds. He was so absorbed in searching for the source of the sound that he almost missed it when Seishirou pulled him back into a tight hug.
"Why are you hugging me?" Subaru squeaked, not sure if he should like it or not.
"Because you deserve to be held." Seishirou was breathing into his neck, sending that tingling feeling all over Subaru's body again. "You deserve to be loved. What That Bastard did to you was absolutely cruel. And... I'm sorry. I am So very sorry any of it happened to you."
"You believe me?" Subaru squeaked again. "I thought... I'm mad, aren't I? That's what everyone thinks, right? I must be mad?"
Seishirou pulled back to gaze fondly down into Subaru's green eyes. "Subaru, I knew from the moment I stepped into the hospital room that you were telling the truth."
"How?"
Seishirou gave him a lecherous grin that had Subaru simultaneously wanting to run and hide and flushing from head to toe. Seishirou slowly leaned in to whisper into his ear, "Because there is no possibility that MY Subaru is in any way, a VIRGIN."
TBC?
