'Sorry for being such a prude :('
'Prude? You? That goodbye kiss was many things but chaste was not one of them. Still blushing now'
'You know what I mean...'
'I said it then and I'll say it again now. I can't think of anything more worth the wait outside of the realms of pure fantasy... and even then only Preston winning the Champions League would come close'
'Who winning the what now?'
'All will become clear in time, love. Your conversion into a North Ender will begin shortly. You must share in my pain!'
':S We're very different, aren't we?'
'That's why it works, my little pocket rocket. I needed some bright New Jersey sunshine in my life just like you needed some dreary Lancashire drizzle xxx'
'It rains half the time in Jersey too, you know. But it's a sweet metaphor, so I'll let it slide. Plus you said pocket rocket again 3 3'
AJ had a hard time wrapping her head around it. That a man so used to instant sexual gratification would be so accepting of her preference for, well, quite the opposite. She wished to high heaven she didn't feel that way. She knew she had nothing to fear from Wade. The necessary affection and attraction was present in abundance, but at the end of the day, she'd known the man for five weeks and whether she liked it or not, she was a slave to her rigid moral code. There was a barrier there and were she to break it she would do so with so much unease and hesitancy that it would cancel out the pleasure of the act itself.
But Wade understood this perfectly. On a purely emotional level, he didn't want to rush either. It was a first time of sorts for him as well, after all. He'd taken her rejection of his advances that morning completely in stride, and her inevitable panicked texting as she came to dwell upon it later in the day had only caused him to reiterate his sentiments. He really was a changed man. He really was in it for the long haul.
'How are Anglo-American relations? I'm hoping no news is good news :)'
'Put it this way: If I didn't think Facebook was an intrusive, attention-seeking waste of time, I'd be changing my relationship status right now... and not to 'it's
complicated''
':D :D :D :D'
'...Or I would but for the fact NO ONE must know about this. Not while Alicia is still the locker room charity case. Capiche?'
'Secret's safe with me, girl. But be forewarned: I will be squealing, squeezing you to death and demanding to know every gory detail when we're next alone together :P'
Yes, much as the final hurdle that stood between Wade, AJ and a relationship had been cleared, they both agreed that a period of intense secrecy was required while Alicia returned to work, hopefully well on her way to a full mental recovery, and the backstage hivemind found a new hate figure. AJ already had enough grief dealing with overzealous kids hurling abuse at her for 'what you did to John Cena' (much of it in language that should never be heard from the lips of a pre-teen); receiving the same treatment from people she actually cared about because of someone she'd actually hurt was more than her conscience could take. In a perverse way the idea somewhat thrilled her. Stolen moments and careful co-ordination all in the name of passion and romance, it would be like an affair with all the guilt and shame replaced with a feeling of moral righteousness.
'Just checked the running order. We'll both be done by 9.30. Meet at my room at 10. Knock three times. Conditions of entry: Bring chocolate. And one of those portable air hockey tables they sell in the store across the street. My dominance over you in the field of scaled-down sports will continue! And we can only watch Control if you agree to watch the first Power Rangers movie when we get to Denver. The best relationships are built on compromise xxx'
AJ had to try and stop herself giggling as she wandered the arena corridors. She felt like a teenager sneaking out on her parents. Not that she ever did such things in her adolescence of course, which probably explained why it still filled her with such childish glee as a 26-year-old. She tried to limit visible traces of her happiness down to a smug grin as she opened the door to the Divas locker room. If anyone asked, she'd just had a relaxing weekend at home. After all, technically she wasn't lying, just being economical with the truth.
She entered the room to find it alive with laughter and lively chatter, and the entirety of WWE's female contingent gathered around one spot in the middle. Something clearly had them very excited. So much so no one even noticed AJ coming through the door.
"Hi guys, what's all the..." AJ began in a louder-than-normal voice as to attract their attention. But the source of their animation soon became obvious. The throng parted to reveal a long-term absentee from their number.
"Alicia!" AJ shrieked, in a tone she instantly realised sounded a lot less pleased and a lot more dismayed than it should have done.
"Hey, AJ!" the willowy Florida native replied, beaming widely. AJ had almost forgotten how Alicia's voice was supposed to sound. The distracted, despondent mumble in which she had uttered what few words she contributed to conversations before her departure had gone, and the effervescent gusto with which she once greeted everyone and everything had returned.
"How, uh... how have you been? What have you been up to?" AJ asked, finding the tone that she hoped was the one she would be using should she not have a million guilty and dishonest thoughts racing around her brain.
"Oh, you know... adding a whole new wing to the Fashion Factory, perfecting the ultimate cookie recipe, going back to Jacksonville Beach, seeing people I've not seen in years, just reconnecting with me. It's been... great," Alicia chirped enthusiastically.
"But, kicking people in the face is me, too. And here's the only place I've found where I can do that without being arrested, so I had to come back."
Alicia broke into her trademark giggle, AJ laughed along a little too loud for a little too long. Suddenly, Alicia's eyes widened and she gasped with realisation.
"What?" AJ asked nervously, the icy grip of paranoia filling her airways.
"You were late, I haven't given you your present!"
Present? God, this was too much. The girl had just returned from a borderline mental breakdown, AJ was merrily carrying on with the man whose rejection caused it and she was buying her a gift? Understand his reasons though she did, at this point in time AJ couldn't help but wish Wade hadn't done this to someone so impossibly nice. Tamina wouldn't have bought everyone presents.
Alicia reached into the bottom of a large plastic gift bag next to her locker and produced a book-shaped present.
"Open it! I saw you reading Volume 1 before I went away. You don't have Volume 2 yet, do you? Sorry if you do,"
AJ peeled back the wrapping to reveal the latest All New X-Men collection. She'd never been so unhappy to receive such a thoughtful gift in her life. She couldn't have bought such a well-chosen present for Alicia if she'd tried. AJ knew Alicia liked clothes but she couldn't even begin to name her favourite designers. She knew she liked baking but she didn't know her favourite cakes. How could she be so observant? And what had she done to deserve it? Signed a few 'get well soon' cards someone else had bought? Murmured 'tell her I said hi' every time Layla or Rosa mentioned going to visit her?
"No, I don't have it yet. This is lovely, thank you!" she said stunned, giving Alicia a stiff, dutiful hug.
"You've all been so sweet over the past month. I'm so sorry I shut you out, I should've known you'd all be there for me," Alicia smiled.
"Well, I know what I'll be doing while you all go out and paint the town," said AJ with another laugh that stuck in her throat.
'Having the time of my life with the man you love,' her mind added.
AJ found her way to a free locker and put the book inside. Alicia was now deep in conversation with Layla and Naomi at the far end of the room. For the first time since her arrival, AJ locked eyes with Kaitlyn, who gave her a broad grin and a double thumbs up. AJ shook her head and scowled. Kaitlyn furrowed her eyebrows quizzically. AJ mimed 'Outside. Ten minutes,' holding up the corresponding number of fingers. Kaitlyn nodded briskly.
"Did you see that? Someone up there is punishing me!" AJ raged despairingly, clenching her fists and pounding then down on thin air as she paced along the corridor, Kaitlyn scurrying to keep up in her wake.
"Punishing you for what? You've done nothing," her best friend, replied, trying to put a comforting hand on her shoulder which AJ immediately shrugged off.
"Haven't I?"
"Of course not! Did you see how happy Alicia was? The break's done it's job. She's over him. She's moving on,"
"She's only fine because she has no idea that the girl she probably spent an hour picking out the right comic book for has received more affection from the man she loves in the past three weeks than she did in eighteen frigging months. But rather than come clean about it, I'm happily excepting her gifts and her hugs like everything's dandy."
"April, you're giving in to them. You said Wade had nothing to be ashamed of. That means you certainly don't have anything to be ashamed of. And if Alicia really is over him, when she finds out she'll understand you were only trying to protect her feelings. Hell, she doesn't even need to find out it's been going on so long if you don't want her to. The only people that know about this are you, me, Wade and whoever he's told, which considering his current popularity levels is probably either Drew or no one."
"It's no one. It was his idea to keep things on the down-low in the first place."
"Well, there you go. It's all in our hands. I'm gonna go ahead and presume none of what we said in my room that morning penetrated Aksana's comatose mind!"
Kaitlyn gave a hearty laugh at the end of this sentence, a sentence which she had presumed would lighten the mood. Instead, AJ froze with her mouth hanging open like her whole world was about to fall in.
"Shit! Aksana! Where is she? I didn't see her in the locker room."
"She's not booked, they gave her the night off. Could be back home, could have gone ahead to the next town, I've no idea. Why? You didn't tell her, did you?"
"She overheard. We talked while you were in the shower," AJ still didn't feel like relaying the bizarre nature of said talk. In fact, it was the out-of-character surreality of that conversation that had caused her to all but forget it was even Aksana she had spoken to until now.
"Well, she's not particularly close to Alicia either. She's not here and she's nothing to gain by spilling the beans. I'll talk with her if you're really
worried, but seriously, just calm down. You're doing nothing wrong."
AJ thought she'd give Kaitlyn some positive feedback for trying her hardest to put her mind at ease and rested her head on the Texan's shoulder. Kaitlyn placed her arms gingerly around AJ's back, half expecting her to rear up and launch off into another pacing rant at any second. But she stayed put as her tension slowly released.
"Why does it have to be so complicated? Even the supposed happiest moments of my life seem to come with a billion layers of bullshit that just turn them into one big clusterfuck of every conceivable emotion," she lamented.
"Just think about tonight. There'll be no Alicia, no me and my lame-ass attempts to cheer you up. It'll just be you and him. And that's all you need."
The clocks struck ten in Pittsburgh. At the Consol Energy Center, Raw entered its final hour. At the Hilton, Wade arrived at the door to AJ's hotel room, giant galaxy bar and air hockey table in hand as requested. Across the river, Alicia Fox waited underneath the Liberty Bridge. Many would say it wasn't the place for a young woman to be out alone after dark. But she needed to ensure this meeting was conducted in absolute privacy. She just hoped her anonymous informer was true to his or her word.
At the sound of the footsteps she wheeled around. A hooded, feminine figure dressed entirely in black drew near her. Alicia lowered her own hood in anticipation, and when the figure followed suit she was shocked to discover the identity of the face underneath.
"You? No offence, but no way was it you that sent those texts. There were words in there that I don't know the meaning of!" Alicia began with wonderment.
"Let's just say you're not the only one putting on a front," Aksana replied curtly.
"So, you're absolutely certain you've got it right?" Alicia queried apprehensively.
"You might say I was the architect of their union," mused Aksana with a self-satisfied smile.
"What?" Alicia couldn't believe these words were coming from the mouth of a woman primarily known for the phrase 'let me entertainment you.' Although in this light she couldn't entirely rule out it actually being Damien Sandow in drag.
"That morning in San Jose, I was there when AJ spoke to Kaitlyn about it. I told her to follow her heart,"
"And you're sure she listened to you?"
"Everyone listens to Aksana. I have a certain... way with these things. It's both a blessing and a curse. I've seen so many people determined to forge a path of love through a forest of doubt and uncertainty. And little AJ, she was among the most determined. A love like that doesn't just burn out, it needs to be extinguished... forcibly."
Alicia didn't doubt that for a moment. There was something unerringly assured in the way this hitherto-unseen side of Aksana conducted herself, as if she somehow floated above it all, like she had a never-ending wealth of prescience, a small portion of which she deigned to impart to whomever she saw fit.
"So how would I go about 'extinguishing' it?" Alicia asked, with purpose, certain Aksana's reply would give her the foundations to put a plan into action.
"Two sayings spring to mind..." she began. As if this conversation wasn't bizarre enough she'd barely looked Alicia in the eye at any point during it's course, staring blankly ahead along the dark, deserted street as if it was somehow informing her thinking.
"The first: the concept of a spanner in the works. There's a reason they say 'spanner' and not, say, 'sledgehammer'. Sabotage must be subtle for it to be truly effective, a gradual collapse rather than a demolition, you see? The second: kindness kills. You're in a privileged position, Alicia. Everyone is on your side, even those who you seek to undermine. Use it to your advantage, play the fool. Your reputation proceeds you, you're the least likely suspect in just about any wrongdoing, keep it that way."
Alicia stared at the pavement in contemplation. Infuriatingly indirect though her advice was, she was fairly sure she followed Aksana's logic. No one would suspected sweet, chipper Alicia Fox. She was the victim, not the aggressor. People couldn't do enough to keep on her good side, and from her guilt-ridden reaction to their exchange earlier in the day, Alicia knew she could count AJ in that number.
It looked to all as if she'd emerged out the whole Wade ordeal non-the-worse; the same positive, perky, polite, personable girl she always was. No one knew how she'd snapped inside, how one man's cruel manipulation of her emotions had gradually steamrollered any optimism and goodwill she had for the world. There was only one thing on her mind now, making Wade Barrett pay for tearing her heart asunder, for making a mockery of her and all she knew life to be. And he expected he could just move on, leave her mentally mutilated while he gave the love that should have been hers to someone else. To AJ.
Though they appeared to be wildly different people on the surface, Alicia saw alot of her old self in that girl. Sunny, playful, hopeful... everything she no longer had the faith in life to be after what Wade had done to her. Why should AJ be allowed to continue to dream while her own dreams lay in pieces blowing forlornly round her mind like tumbleweeds? What had AJ done do deserve Wade's love that she hadn't? She'd given so much for so long and this woman expected to just walk in, steal his heart in a matter of weeks and live happily ever after. Oh no. She'd make AJ feel the way she felt. And in doing so destroy Wade's dreams as well. There was no justice in their happiness. None at all.
"I know what to do now, but I'm going to need your..." Alicia began, but looked up to find she was once again alone, not a sound but the traffic rumbling above her head, not a soul in sight. It was as if Aksana was never there.
