Since I'm here, I might as well reiterate. I don't own Danny Phantom or the Ghostbusters. Nor do I own Rocky Balboa or the song listed in this chapter.

Lots of angst in this chapter, so heads up.


I Ain't Afraid of No Ghosts

Chapter 7
Break Me Down

Armageddon. That was the only word for it. Death and destruction on an unimaginable scale.

Danny walked through it, stupefied by all the carnage, the scent of death filling his nostrils. Finally, a familiar building loomed large.

It was the Ghostbusters' Firehouse, in ruins. The Ecto-1 was sticking out of the wall, and blood dripped from the broken glass of the windows. Among the blood, hanging from the broken window by the cord, was a thrower from a Proton Pack.

Danny took a step back, and stepped on something squishy. Dreading what it was, he looked down anyway. He had stepped in a large puddle of ectoplasm. A partially melted green arm stuck out of it, leaving no doubt as to what it once was.

"What did all this?"

"You did," said a cold voice.

Danny didn't have to turn around. He knew who it was, and staring him in the face was actually worse than him gloating where he couldn't be seen.

"You caused all this, going mad from your self-imposed exile. If you had stayed behind, you might have had your friend's guidance to help you. But now, with them unreachable, you're slipping closer and closer to the brink…"

A hand grabbed Danny's shoulder, pushing him to the ground, whereupon his tormentor could be seen.

"Closer to ME!"

"No!"

"Face facts, Danny! No matter where you go or what you do, you can't escape me…because I am you!"

"NOOOOO!"

Danny shot awake, mouth open in a silent scream, cold sweat running down his face. He rubbed his hands across his face. That nightmare had been more vivid than the last ones. They were getting worse.

Danny slunk into the bathroom, trying not to wake Egon or Slimer, and splashed some water on his face to shock the remnants of the nightmare away. When he took a look in the mirror, he flinched.

He looked like a wreck. His face was haggard, and the pale eye shone out like a deformity. Even chalking some of it up to the nightmare, it was clear that he looked a different person.

Deciding that sleep would no longer be an option, Danny crept down the stairs to the second floor, where the kitchen and rec room was. Making himself a cup of hot cocoa, he sat down and turned on the TV, hoping to take his mind off of things and calm his nerves.

Keeping the volume low, he flipped through a few channels before something stopped him.

It was a scene from a movie he recognized. A deep-voiced man was talking to his son.

"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place, and I don't care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward; how much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain't you! You're better than that!"

Danny turned off the TV, unable to watch more. It was as if the speech was being made directly to him.

How many times had he been beaten to the ground and just wanted to stay there? How many times had life thrown him a punch he couldn't dodge?

His ghost fighting had eaten up much of his time. Late nights and lack of sleep were a constant reminder of this. And no matter what he did, there would always be people who screamed that it was all a lie, that Danny Phantom was a menace, that he set up a lot of his fights to make himself look good. Even his own parents had said this sometimes. But he got up in the morning and kept on doing it, because it was his responsibility to do so.

He had always gotten back up, but this time, he might was well still be laying on the ground…

oOo

Egon strode down the stairs, eager to get some coffee before the others got there, particularly Janine, since she always came in early.

To his surprise, he found Danny sitting at the table, nursing a mug.

"You're up early."

"Couldn't sleep," replied Danny, "Been up since three."

Egon tried to keep a stoic face, but was still stunned, more so when he found several empty hot cocoa packets in the trash while he was throwing a packet of sweeter away.

"All right. That's it."

Egon marched back to the eating area, set his mug of coffee down with an audible clunk, and sat down, his eyes boring into Danny. Danny set down his mug, pretty sure what was coming next.

"I've been patient, but this has gone on long enough," said Egon, his voice steady but somehow thunderous, "You're in a lot of pain, I can see that, but nothing good can come of bottling it up like that. You need to talk to someone. I can tell that something horrible happened to you, and you're afraid to get to close to people, lest it happen again. But if you don't talk to someone, you'll go completely insane. Talk to me. What happened?"

Danny was silent for a long time before speaking.

"Professor Spengler…Egon…have you ever had everything you could have wanted…only to have it all ripped away from you?"

Egon's mind brought up a scene that, despite being forgiven for, weighed heavily on his soul. The old gang, the Original Ghostbusters, at the twilight. Their company liquidated, their brotherhood broken. Ray, Winston, Peter, and Janine looking at him with betrayal in their eyes. Him, the man who broke it.

"Yes…"

"My father is dead, my mother is in a coma, and my sister, best friend, and girlfriend have to pretend I'm dead to throw off the trail of the madman who did this. And I faced the madman, and in my anger, nearly crossed a line I swore never to cross."

Danny's hand clenched the table until his knuckles turned white. His eyes misted over at the horrible memories, not all recent.

"My dreams are filled with the laughing face of the madman and something that chills my blood and puts raw fear in my very soul. What I'm talking about is something that could bring entire armies to a halt, or rain ruin upon a city."

"You mean…a disaster of biblical proportions?"

"At least. And I hold the keys. Bottom line, I'm afraid of falling too far, because if I do, if I cross that line…everything burns…"

Danny's mind flashed back to a memory that, try as he might, he could never let rest. The image of a muscular man-no, a monster-with flaming hair pierced his mind like a dagger.

The Darkness…

Before Egon could say anymore, a voice from the stairwell interrupted them.

"Egon? You up?"

It was Janine, arriving to start the day. Danny stood up roughly, mumbled something about going for a walk, then disappeared up the stairs, presumably to get some clothes on.

Egon thumped the table, uncharacteristically angry. It wasn't Janine's fault, he knew, but he had been so close. Who knows when Danny would get the courage to continue?

oOo

When Danny said walk, he meant flight. Flying always helped clear his head and calm him down.

Not this time.

Danny's mind was a swirl of pain and sadness, the weight of everything threatening to crush his soul.

He never had time to properly mourn his father's death, and his mother's condition was still an unknown. That alone would be backbreaking, but then there was the fact that, in exiling himself, he had cut ties with his support group.

Jazz had always been there to lend an ear and reassure him with sisterly love and cool logic in the face of overwhelming emotional pain. Her skills as a psychologist were sharp, and they had more than once helped Danny lighten the burden of his responsibilities.

Tucker had been his best friend for what felt like forever. He was always there is a joke to lighten the mood, or a scheme, speech, or story to distract from the everyday pressures and help Danny relax. And he would always give his ear to Danny's troubles, never once asking for anything more or less than the truth.

And Sam…it was said that absence made the heart grow fonder, and in his case, his heart ached for her. The silent hours they had shared, looking at the stars, the tender moments, the kisses…

Hers was an independent soul, and a source of comfort for Danny that Jazz and Tucker could never equal. Sam had a way of putting things into perspective in a way Danny could never imagine. It had been she who pushed him to try being a hero and it had been she who helped sustain him through it all. Sam was a constant, more than the other two.

She was something special, and Danny longed for her.

And his nightmares…they were more spot-on now than before. He was immensely powerful, and could easily do many of those things if he let go. Guarding against The Darkness was harder than ever. Danny held back constantly, and a small part of his power had even been held back during his vengeful attack on Plasmius.

And now, without any way to get in touch with his friends and family, lest Plasmius be listening and discover the truth, it felt like he was in a race against himself, what he might do if things got worse.

As Danny flew low against the ground, keeping up invisibility and intangibility so as not to hit anything or be discovered, he heard something. A strange, plunking melody that drew him in. He found the source, a teen around his age listening to a boom box, or something like it. Danny hovered near, and listened as the lyrics rang out.

A long day alone
The emptiness is so real
Never having peace of mind
Running from what I can't see

And there is nowhere left to hide
Turn and face these empty eyes
All alone, heart untold,
Trying to find

Break me down!
Replace this fear inside!
Take this nothingness from me!
I want to fight!
I want to shine!
I want to rise!
Break me down…

Danny found himself in shock. It was as if the song had been written for him. The lyrics described exactly what he was feeling now. He felt all alone, his mind in turmoil, running not only from Plasmius, but the ever-looming specter of The Darkness. From the latter, there was indeed nowhere to hide, despite what he tried to tell himself, since the source of the distress was within his own mind. And all he wanted to was to be free of it all, to go back to the way things were.

I try to find myself
I find the stranger trapped inside
And I'll take one more step away
From the face I used to recognize

It was ironic, because when he had woken up, he didn't recognize himself for a moment. It was like he was walking further and further away from the person he had been before his father died and this whole thing started. And still the song continued, the metal tune piercing Danny to his core.

Familiar shadows closing in
Suffocating fear descends
You killed a life, uncovered eyes
Trying to find

Break me down!
Replace this fear inside!
Take this nothingness from me!
I want to fight!
I want to shine!
I want to rise!
Break me down!

Replace this fear inside!
Take this nothingness from me!
I want to fight!
I want to shine!
I want to rise!
Break me down…

As the song reached an instrumental, Danny settled his still-invisible form against the wall. It was so extraordinary. A single song had highlighted the turmoil in his mind perfectly.

Break me down!

I want to fight…
I want to shine…
I want to rise…
Break me down!

I want to fight!
I want to shine!
I want to rise!
Break me down!

I want to fight!
I want to shine!
I want to rise!
Break me down!

The teen beside him clicked off the boom box, sighing.

"Gotta love that alternative rock. And you wouldn't know these guys were a Christian rock group."

Danny kicked into the air. Would the ironies never cease? A Christian rock group! Now, he had nothing against religion, but being brought up by scientists didn't leave much room for it, even if they were paranormal scientists. Sam had learned that pretty early on, and stopped talking about some of the tales from her Jewish equivalent of Sunday School. There wasn't anything wrong with them, mind you. Danny liked the one about the golem. But some of the things there, he just didn't get.

Now a Christian rock group, one that drew inspiration from their faith, as was the norm for the genre, had given him something to chew on, something that struck a chord with his soul.

Could he break through the fog? Could he shine again? Could he rise up from the depths of his despair?

Maybe not alone. The point of religion was to be a part of something bigger than the individual, to believe in something higher. To believe that there was a force at work, and having faith would lift you out of any hole, no matter how deep.

But since he didn't understand and probably never will, he wouldn't turn to religion. He would go back to the firehouse and tell them his problems. They could help him.

He had to believe that. It was the only chance he had.

Then his ghost sense went off…


Aside from the speech from 'Rocky Balboa' (great movie), I'd like to give a big round of applause to Christian rock group Red. They wrote the song, which I stumbled onto quite by accident. Actually, it was part of a Danny Phantom video on Youtube, with scenes of 'The Ultimate Enemy' set to the song. The song worked so well, I decided to use it here.

Here's a link, delete the spaces: .com/ watch? v=gq HRcGB UvzA

Works pretty well, wouldn't you say?