Thanks to everyone who has stuck with me so far. I hope you enjoy this one. It's a bit longer than most. Reviews always welcomed.
"You are amazingly bad at this" Kira gave Varric one of her patented pouts. Varric shook his head and laugh. "Even with that cute pout of yours, you are still bad."
"Oh come on. I can't be THAT bad."
"No...seriously, you really are. I can't believe you never played Wicked Grace in the Circle. What the hell did you guys do for fun in there?" She shrugged her shoulders slightly.
"Oh, we studied!" Her face lit up at the memory of her time in the Circle with her friends. We would study magic, such as its origins. You know much is not really known about magic. Like where did it come from? How different was the magic of the ancient elves from the magic we have today? So much of Elven history is lost, but from what we do know, they had a wealth of knowledge when it came to magic. It is such a shame so much of it was lost." She was rambling now. Varric idly listened while he shuffled the deck to get ready for their next game, throwing in a few uh huh's and really's to keep her from finding out he was barely paying attention. She didn't seem to notice since her rambling continued.
"We also studied the applications magic can have in the World. How we can use it to help the people of Thedas. So many people are afraid of magic, but maybe if we can find a way it could help in their daily lives, they wouldn't hate it so much. They may even grow to like it. The tricky part would be getting them to accept it. It would have to be something not overtly dangerous, something that anyone, even people without magical talent can use and preferably something that can help in everyday lives. We were stuck on trying to figure something out that fit that criteria."
"Really?" Was Varric's only reply as he shuffled the deck again. She looked over to see his eyes half lidded. She was boring him. She always did that, ramble on and on about things that interested her. She sometimes forgot, not many people outside of the Circle found magic as interesting as she did. In fact, most people outside of the Circle didn't like magic at all and would rather not discuss it, let alone see it. She decided a change of topic was in order, to try and salvage the fun that was rapidly dissipating.
"There was also the sex." At the mention of the word Sex, Varric perked up.
"Come again?" Varric asked, stopping his shuffling and a grin spreading on his face at the thought of a juicy story.
Outside of the door to the room they had stowed away to play Wicked Grace stood the Commander of the Inquisition. He had been standing outside of the room since the beginning of Kira's rant debating whether he should go inside or not and wondering how Leliana and Josephine talked him into this. Once Kira started her rant, he heard the infectious joy in her voice as she spoke about her time in the Circle with her fellow mages. As she went on and on about her studies, it became more and more clear to him that the news he was chosen to deliver would devastate her. He shouldn't be the one to do this, he barely knew her. Outside of the time they first met to the second time they met in the war room, the two hadn't said a word to each other. When he tried to use this point, Josephine and Leliana ganged up on him explaining that since they were both in the Circle for so long, they had a common ground and since the news he had to deliver dealt with him in around about way, he was the best person who could understand and deal with her inevitable reaction. He wanted to argue it, but they way they explained it to him sounded so logical. Standing outside of the door for the length of Kira's rant helped him decide that not only did he want to not deliver this news to her, he definitely wasn't right person to do it. He had been played by the two woman, skilled in that infernal game they always reference. He was about to walk away and tell them to deal with this when he heard Kira mention the word sex making him freeze in his spot, waiting to hear what she said next.
Back inside the room, Varric waited for Kira to finish. The cards set aside and forgotten for now, his hands folded in front of him and that patented grin plastered on his face. Kira smirked, knowing that it would get his attention.
"Well, you can't stick a bunch of men and women into a place and expect nothing to happen." She shrugged. "It is only a natural outcome right? That magical application I was talking about earlier? Well, it wasn't always about how it could better the lives of the people in Thedas. More often than not I'm embarrassed to say, our meeting would turn from how can we help the World to how can we get people experience a mind blowing orgasm." Varric laughed and slapped his hand on the table.
"I'll be damned, that blonde bastard didn't lie about everything." This elicited a confused look from Kira. Varric just chuckled and shook his head. "Don't worry about it. Please by all means, continue."
"Well, we came up with a number of things. Like lightning for instance is a very good source of pleasure in the right hands of course." Kira paused. She swore she heard a choked gasp coming from the direction of the door. Varric apparently heard it too because he was also looking towards the door. When they no longer heard any noise, Kira shrugged and continued her story.
"You could use lightning during foreplay. The body has several stimulus points that respond very well to it. The tricky part is doing it in the middle of sex. If the mage is enjoying themselves too much they could end up frying their partner if they put a bit too much enthusiastic power behind what was supposed to be a harmless jolt. Varric grimaced.
"You just turned something arousing into something horrifying." Kira laughed.
"Sorry about that. Just telling the truth." She shifted a bit in her seat. "To be honest, I can't really talk much about the sexual applications for magic. I um...never really tried it myself. I know the theory behind it but I never um really did what the other mages did." Varric arched a brow. He smelled another story here, this one a bit more sensitive than the other one but just as juicy. He had to coax her into telling the truth.
"So..." He started, wanting to choose his words carefully. He picked up the cards and gave them a quick shuffle. "Never found Mr. Right in the Circle?" She shrugged at this.
"Well...there was this one guy. I was absolutely infatuated with him and believe me I would have loved to put everything I learned into practice with him."
"But?" Varric supplied, dealing the cards between the two of them.
"He was off limits..."
"Already seeing someone?" Kira shook her head no and picked up the cards he dealt, scrunching up her face, displeased with her hand.
"Templar?" Kira hesitated for a moment then nodded her head. Varric laughed. "You like to live dangerously eh Herald? She shrugged.
"What can I say? I love a guy in armor." Another odd sound came from the door. Kira didn't catch this one, but Varric did. Someone was eavesdropping in on their conversation. "He was a really nice guy." Kira continued. "It was as if he didn't care about the fact that I was a mage. He always treated me with respect. Most of the other weren't exactly mean, but they wouldn't talk to us, wouldn't smile. They just watched us. It was kinda creepy you know? But Oren? He would always smile, always say hello." She smiled fondly at the memory.
"You miss that place huh?"
"I wouldn't say miss. It's just a little odd being away from there. I have been there for so much of my life. It's...different being away. But I am enjoying the chance to travel and see new things. I just wish this whole Herald baggage didn't come with it." Varric laughed.
"Yeah, you got pretty screwed on that one." Kira joined in on the laughter.
"Very screwed. So tell me Ser Tethras. Am I hopeless? Will I never get to learn the intricate workings of Wicked Grace?"
"Don't you worry Herald. I'm not giving up on you yet. If I can teach a dog how to play Wicked Grace, I can teach you."
"A...a dog? Seriously?" Varric nodded with a grin.
"Hawke's mabari Barktholomew. He had a bad habit of wagging his tail when he had a good hand though." Kira shook her head in disbelief.
"A bloody mabari plays Wicked Grace better than I do." Varric patted her hand.
"There there. You'll get better. Though I think it would be better if we had another person join us." Varric slid out of his seat and padded over to the door silently. Kira watched him curiously, when she was about to open her mouth, Varric put a finger to his lips, indicating for her to keep quiet. Kira nodded slowly, still confused and watched as Varric yanked open the door to reveal the Commander of the Inquisition forces. Kira jumped out of her seat.
"Commander. I uh...we were...uh." She stammered helplessly. Varric felt bad for her seeing her flounder about and decided to save her.
"Curly! Glad you're here. Join us for a hand? I was just teaching the Herald here how to play Wicked Grace." Cullen, who looked like a cat that swallowed the canary after Varric opened the door, and caught him eavesdropping on them managed to recover from his initial embarrassment.
"Uh..no thank you Varric. I was actually looking for Lady Trevelyan."
"Oh...is something wrong Commander?" Kira asked, stepping forward. Cullen rubbed the back of his neck remembering his task, wishing he left when he had the chance. Varric stepped back away from the two and leaned against a nearby wall, silently watching the exchange. Cullen sighed and dropped his hand.
" Lady Josephine thought it would be a good idea to inform your Circle of your whereabouts. It wouldn't do to have the Templars of your Circle think you initially became an apostate, even though technically all mages are apostates now." He sighed again. "It seems that your Circle has rebelled as well."
"Wait." Kira said shaking her head. "That makes no sense. Ostwick is neutral. We voted that it would be best to not pick a side."
"According to Sister Leliana, after the Conclave was destroyed, a few members of your Circle decided they no longer wished to remain neutral and spurred them to action." He hesitated for a few moments. "It...brings me no pleasure to inform you that the Circle's decision to no longer remain neutral was not agreed by all. " Kira's eyes widened. It seemed she could sense his next words. "They warred with each other and...there were casualties on both sides."
"Do..." She paused, unsure if she really wanted to know the answer to her question. Gathering her courage, she continued. "Do you know who died?"
"Yes." He handed her a parchment she handed realized he was holding until now. With a shaky hand she took the parchment and read over the names. A tense silence filled the air until Kira let out an audible gasp, followed by a strangled no. The parchment fell from Kira's hands. She turned and took a step back to her chair, desperately wanting to sit down but teetered as soon as she took a step foward.
"Catch her Curly!" Varric barked from his spot in the corner. Cullen snapped to action, spurred by Varric's words and caught Kira just before she collapsed to the floor. Kira let out a sob and turned in Cullen's arms, burying her face in his fur pauldron. Cullen held her tightly, allowing her to cry against him, his face stoic, understanding her pain. Varric took this time to slip out of the room, leaving the two alone. After a long while, Kira stopped crying. Falteringly, she pulled away from Cullen, instantly missing the warmth from his hug. She looked up to him, her eyes puffy and red from crying. Cullen moved his hand to reach up and wipe away a stray tear that streak down her face but stopped himself, remembering who she was. She was the Herald, beautiful as she may be and as attracted to her as he was, he knew that he would have no chance with her. Instead he allowed her hands to drop to his sides.
"Are you okay Kira?" He asked in a soft tone, a worried look on his face as he warred with himself over his desire to pull her into another hug, missing the feel of her body against his. She gave him a weak smile.
"You called me Kira..." Cullen blinked, not realizing that he had gotten overly familiar with her.
"My apologies Herald. I did not..."
"No!" She said suddenly and a bit louder than she intended, cutting him off. "I am happy you did. Everyone calls me Herald. I know that's how they see me but...I am just Kira. It was nice to see that someone didn't forget it. Please...call me Kira...I mean I know you can't do it all the time but if we ever get to talk alone like this again..." Her voice trailed off.
"Of course Kira..." Cullen said with a small smile. Watching her as she successfully made it to her seat this time, plopping heavily into it. She sucked in a deep breath and exhaled. He waited silently, letting her continue when she was ready.
"Two of the names on that list...I knew them well." She frowned, swallowing back her tears that threatened to surface again. She didn't feel like crying anymore. "Senior Enchanter Lydia...She...she was like a mother to me." Cullen sat down in the seat Varric previously occupied, folded his hands on the table and listened. "When I was first brought to the Circle, my mother would visit me all the time. But after a few months, the visits became more and more sparse until they stopped altogether." She frowned. "She would still send me letters on my birthday, but that was about it. Senior Enchanter Lydia I guess saw this and she took it upon herself to put herself in my life." Kira chuckled softly. "I was such a brat when I was younger. I hated the Circle and by extension, everyone in it. Who was this lady trying to step in. She wasn't my mother. She could never BE my mother. I wanted my real mother back. No matter how much I would pull away or push her away, she kept coming back. She wouldn't take no for an answer." Kira smiled sadly. "I eventually got it through my thick skull that unlike my birth mother, she wasn't going away. After that point, I stuck to her like glue. She was such a beautiful person. I lost count of how many times I slipped up and called her mother. As far as I am concerned...she was my mother." Kira hung her head and sighed.
"Knight Templar Oren" Cullen said suddenly. Kira looked up to him, confusion evident on her face. "The second name, it was Knight Templar Oren." He offered, his voice low, she nodded slowly, trying to figure out how he knew. It came to her suddenly, he had to have looked at the list before he given to her of course and he overheard her and Varric talking, he must have heard of her infatuation with Knight Templar Oren. Kira can feel her cheeks heat up from embarrassment. She hoped in the back of her mind that he missed that whole part, evidently, he did not. "I knew him..." Cullen continued. "He was originally stationed at the Circle in Kirkwall. He wanted to help mages, protect them from themselves and from others. He remembered the vows Templars stood for when so many others had forgotten. I trained him. Most recruits I train, I keep them at an arms' length. Due to what happened to me in my past, I figured it would be best to not make friends. Oren however had other thoughts on the matter. He bugged me whenever he could." Cullen shook his head and chuckled to himself. "I thought him to be annoying at first, always insisting on talking with me, coming to me with questions or asking for advice. I thought he was a pain in the ass. Then somewhere down the line, I grew to look forward to our talks. He was probably the only person I could truly call friend while I was stationed in Kirkwall. He told me once he saw me as an older brother." Cullen sighed. "He wasn't happy in Kirkwall. He didn't like what Meredith was doing, didn't like what the other Templars were doing to some of the mages. It begin to affect him negatively. He was having trouble sleeping, getting into fights with his fellow Templars. I knew if he stayed, it would only get worse. I recommended that he move to the Circle at Ostwick. It was known to be one of the more tamer Circles and I thought it would be a good place for him. I was saddened to lose my friend, but I cared more about him feeling better than having someone to talk with. He was grateful for the transfer and promised to write me as much as he could and he kept good on his word. When the Circle in Kirkwall collapsed. I just knew I made the right decision to transfer him then...this happens." Kira reached across the table and took Cullen's gauntlet hand into her own. Cullen looked up at her. "I...overheard you and Varric talking about Oren." Kira blushed, unable to hide her embarrassment. It seems her guess was right. "I'm glad to hear that he remained true to himself and his vows. I'm told he died defending the mages who wanted to remain neutral. I knew he wouldn't want to go any other way."
"Thank you Cullen. For telling me...for comforting me...for sharing in my grief. It doesn't make it easier to take but it helps knowing I am not alone." Cullen nodded and let his eyes fall to his hand which Kira still held in her own. A comfortable silence fell over the two as they grieved together.
