How do you love someone
Without getting hurt?
How do you love someone
Without crawling in the dirt
So far in my life
Clouds have blocked the sun
How do you love, how do you love someone?
Mondays. Most people hated them, but I liked them. I liked a fresh start to the week. I liked them even better when they were like today, calm and with Karin absent from classes. I was sitting in the living room looking over a theology assignment I'd gotten from my teacher today. It was simple and due by Friday, so I figured I'd work on it through the week seeing as today I just didn't feel like doing school. Sometimes it didn't seem worth doing.
Itachi and Sasuke were both out so I was alone, I'd been out with Yoru for a while to brush and spend time with her. Her winter coat was being shed and good lord, I had enough hair for a clone of her. I sighed, setting my stuff down. I showered and read a couple of books in the few more hours I had alone before Sasuke returned. I glanced up at him but remained silent. I felt something boiling inside of me and I wasn't sure what it was. "I heard from Hinata you had a job at the library." He said suddenly. I froze, waiting for his reaction as if it were a time bomb.
"Yeah, Itachi told me about it and I got the job when I went to be interviewed. It's every Wednesday." He scoffed, walking out into the living room and smirking down at me. "Doing what? Writing shit for some stupid kids? What kind of pathetic life are you trying to lead?" He said with a taunting lilt to his voice. I don't know why he hated the thought of me writing so badly. Why he hated the thought of me enjoying something, actually, he put everything I did down. "I have dreams too, Sasuke. Even if you don't like them. Get over it." I said, appalled that I'd been stupid enough to say that. I knew what was coming before it even happened.
His fist collided with my cheek, knocking me straight off the couch. Blood filled my mouth and pain burst from the wound. I pulled my arms up to cover my face when he spat an insult at me, kicking me in the stomach hard. "Say it again." He dared, leering over me. "Talk back to me again."
I was scared. More than that, I was angry. Angry at being scared, at myself, at him, at everyone else because one way or another they said something to him and it only made him pissed off at me. I turned over and pushed myself up, doing the only thing I really thought I could do.
I ran.
I ran out the door and into the night, not caring what he thought about it or what anyone seeing me thought about it. I had to escape him. I didn't stop running until I was in the middle of the city, panting so hard for air I thought my lungs would collapse. I felt stupid then, as I stood on the sidewalk. He'd chased me from our home, and he'd only be either angry or twistedly amused when I got home, bastard. I looked around, sighing as I began to walk. I don't know what had made me run so fast, but in the ten minutes it took me to run here it would take close to thirty to get me home. Maybe he'd be in bed if I was lucky. Luck was a damn cruel thing, though.
I started walking away from the lights and other people into the darker, sleeping parts of the city where lamp posts were farther in between. I felt a shiver run through me, shaking it off. But it got worse, the hairs on my body stood up as I felt someone staring at me. I turned around, not seeing anyone I shook my head at my own paranoia and turned forward again.
"Ah!"
I cried out in shock when someone grabbed me by my upper arms, the sickening smell of booze and sweat making me gag. "Well lookit' what we have! A pretty little girl walkin' by herself." A sleazy male voice spoke. I heard another man laugh, feeling his hands slide down my back. "What're you doing out here all alone? It's dangerous." I tried to jerk away, growling angrily when they wouldn't let go. "Leave me alone." I demanded, glaring up at the blonde haired man that had my arms. He had a lip ring and a tattoo of a rose on his neck. "Now, what kinda gentlemen would we be to let a lady like yourself walk home alone?" They both laughed hysterically at that.
I tried to knee the blonde in the groin, but he moved quicker than I could. "Bitch, what's your problem?" The one behind me slurred, turning me around. I struggled desperately when he got close to my face and forced his hands up my shirt. He had his head shaved and the tattoos looked like he'd been drawn on by kids.
"Get off me!" I screamed, pulling hard against them. "Relax baby, just have some fun." The blonde laughed, his hand sliding along my hips and to my crotch. I screamed, as loud as I could. The bald one punched me in the stomach. "Shut it, slut!" He hissed, pulling at my shirt to try to rip it off. I felt tears burn my eyes. Why were they doing this? This was disgusting, it was wrong! I tried to scream again, praying someone would come.
The blonde suddenly held a knife to my lips. "Scream again and I'll cut your tongue out." He hissed. I shook, biting my lip. This couldn't happen, it couldn't! I shut my eyes when I felt them stick their hands down my pants. It was going to…
"Oof!"
I gasped, eyes flying open when one of them was roughly shoved away from me, forcing him to let go. I watched the bald one trip as he was shoved, hitting his head on the ground and obviously being knocked out. The blonde creep started to say something but he was punched in the face. I was in shock and barely registered what had just happened. I focused on the man that had just saved me, nearly going faint.
"I-Itachi?" I stuttered as he put his hands on my shoulders, looking over me to see if I was hurt. "Are you okay? Amaya?" He said my name when I didn't answer. I managed a nod, still shaking as I looked behind me at the blonde as he started standing up. He waved the knife in the air. "Fuckin' bitch, you'll regret that!" He slurred, blood dripping from his mouth. Itachi pulled me against his chest, raising his leg almost up to his chest and kicking the pervert straight in the face. I stared open-mouthed with shock as he pulled me towards his car, helping me inside. I leaned heavily against the window. What had just happened, it didn't feel real… As if I were in some sort of daze.
"Are you hurt? Do you need to go to the hospital?" I slowly shook my head, but I couldn't manage any words. He still looked concerned, but he complied with my wish and drove us home. I slowly got out of the car and stood a little shakily in the driveway, he walked around, putting a hand on my arm. I felt robotic as I walked inside. "Thank you." I murmured on automatic reflex, walking into my bedroom. Sasuke was in bed reading, he glanced at me, not commenting on my torn shirt or anything else. Not a word. "Done running?" He said, sounding smug at the fact he'd practically chased his own girlfriend out of the house. Why would you be proud of that?
"I got attacked." I whispered the only words to cross my mind, folding my arms protectively over my chest. He raised a brow. "What?" I cleared my throat, speaking a little more clearly. "I was walking back and two men attacked me. I was almost raped." I wasn't prepared for him to snort. I stared with confused eyes at him. "Who would want to? You're probably making a huge deal out of two drunk guys hitting on you." He rolled his eyes. I felt like he had stabbed me.
"Wh-what? How can you say that! They held a knife up to me!" I said, sounding as if I was pleading with him. "Well now you've learned not to go out at night, right? That was stupid to begin with."
He… He really didn't care… I was his girlfriend and I'd just been assaulted! And you don't care?!
I stormed from the room as I felt pain explode inside of me, slamming the door shut. I walked out into the living room where I found Itachi still standing in the living room, putting his phone away as if he'd been talking to someone. He looked at me and raised his hand as if to place it on my shoulder, but I broke before he got to. I felt my legs collapse beneath me and I fell to the floor on my knees, he managed to lighten the fall as he knelt quickly to catch me, sitting on his knees beside me and hugging me close. I pressed my face against his shoulder and cried, unable to stop. I couldn't stop for anything. It hurt so much, worse than any of the times he'd hit me… I was terrified and angry and so, so hurt.
He didn't care! I'd almost been raped, they could have killed me! And he said I was overreacting!
He rubbed my back as I cried, holding me tightly, like he was protecting me. I clutched his shirt, not wanting to let go. I hadn't felt this safe in such a long time. I didn't know how long I cried, but I knew it had been a while because the sky was brightening a bit. I breathed slowly to calm my heartbeat. He let me rest against him a little while longer until I pulled back, wiping my eyes. "I'm sorry." I murmured raggedly, ashamed of the way I'd practically forced him to deal with me. He shook his head and hugged me again, almost making me want to cry even more. "You have nothing to apologize for. I'm sorry this happened." He murmured. I took a shaky breath, letting him help me stand. I sat on the couch. "I'll get some medicine for you." He said, going into the kitchen. Sasuke came out while he was gone, picking up his keys and giving me a disgusted look. I didn't react.
He left, a minute later Itachi came out and handed me a cup of water and two painkillers. I thanked him and swallowed the medicine, leaning back. "Amaya, why were you in the middle of the city so late at night?" He asked slowly, sitting beside me. I didn't answer for a minute. I wanted to. I needed to… How long could I lie to him? How long would I continue covering for someone that didn't care about me?
"I made him angry last night and he… He hit me and I ran outside. I didn't know I'd run that far, I started to walk back and, and…" I trailed off, my breathing quickening. I hyperventilated if I got scared, I'd never grown out of it. And at that moment, I was terrified beyond any meaning. I could be sealing my death deal telling Itachi what Sasuke did. He hushed me soothingly, pulling me against him again, but I could feel he was rigid. I rested my face against his chest, slowly calming my breathing. I realized then how exhausted I felt, my eyes fighting to stay open. I flinched when I felt him stand, picking me up bridal style and taking me into the bedroom. I murmured a soft thank you as he put me in bed, kissing my forehead. I blushed slightly, relaxing. I found it bad that my boyfriend's brother cared more about me than he did.
What was worse was that I was starting to care more about him as well…
AUTHORESS NOTE:
I… I can't remember if I edited this or not, so I skimmed and didn't see any mistakes but if there are tell me.
To Anon: People that are emotionally abused often grow quickly attached to anyone that comforts them or is nice to them, or they may grow distant from everyone and not trust them. Amaya slightly pertains to both of these, but she is slowly falling for Itachi for more than the former reason, of course.
To clear something up; Itachi had actually been looking for her when he got home at close to midnight and realized she wasn't home and that she was out alone in a fairly dangerous city. It wasn't a total coincidence he'd found her.
Hi guys! So, this chapter was both kind of a shove for Amaya, and to show her how little Sasuke actually feels for her.
