Chapter 7 learning the ropes
Rated M for mature lol
Disclaimer I don't own South Park
Chapter 7 learning the ropes
Annals P.O.V
Mondays are different especially when I work at a fucking school lunch room that has the school bigger then it should I mean what kind of school has the entire 12 grades plus pre K and kindergarten all mashed up. Oh well we used to have a middle and high school but it got destroyed by a bunch of bronies so we just improved on the elementary school. Yeah like a bunch of pony loving brats could really destroy 5 schools ha. Well I have been briefed on the fact that every Friday and Monday I can cook my own original food so yeah seafood Monday and Italian Friday baby nanas favorite shrimp on Monday and matts favorite generic spaghetti on Friday hell he even offered to help me cook on Fridays. This job is only till I earn enough for my own restaurant and I wont except hand outs from nana or matt…even if nana is willing to pay me for my body ha poor girl it was a one night stand and yet she is begging for more I mean I like girls and nana is a freak in bed but boys just satisfy me better one day she will meet a hot piece of ass and settle down with her.
"Hello beautiful" said nana
"Uggh hi nana" I said
"What's wrong" asked nana?
"Its just I was hoping to have a nice restaurant where I can cook fine quezines not heat up pizzas that were delivered from a half ass store" I said
"Well I am sure they wont mind you making your own pizzas I mean if you can cook why not matt can donate the budget and you can cook your own fresh product I mean the last chief cooked his own food why cant you" said nana
Wow that's one thing about nana she is smart…I mean I am smarter but hell that's a good damn idea
"Uggh great shrimp" said matt
"Sorry matt nana comes first so how's Kyle doing," I asked
"Still butt hurt about bebe I didn't know she doesn't know and he's too afraid to tell her I mean shes a reasonable girl and Stan is till iffy about Wendy accidentally giving me a BJ and I am still tracking down Clyde for fucking drugging me but the pussy is hiding from me" said matt
"Probably cause you sent token to the hospital Craig apologized saying he didn't know Clyde was going to spike your soda he even agreed to kick his ass for you" I said
"Nahh i'm cool with him I mean token can straighten his ass out later" said matt
"Uggh still cant believe they fucked in your closet I am shocked you haven't moved out after that image was in your head," said nana
"Ha well the maid cleaned it a little extra this morning plus cartman owes me 100 bucks for the wall damages and he better not think I wont sue his ass for putting the holes in my god damn wall rich or not that was fucking rude as hell" said matt
"Shh don't tell the whole school your rich then you will have more friends then you want right now," said nana
"Yeah well he still owes me," said matt
"Man stop bitching I am sure he will pay if not I can persuade him," I said
Matt and nana walked away and Stan and Kyle showed up next
"Look he didn't know ok just calm down," said Stan
"Yeah well now Bebes a whore so I probably wont ever get with her," said Kyle
"Ha well its easy just do something romantic" I said
"Look I don't know who you are but its kind of personal plus you're an adult I highly doubt you know about teenage hormones," said Stan
"Like the fact that I scored you the alcohol that got Wendy drunk enough for you to get anal and missionary in 1 night plus guilt on her for a possible favor in your future" I said
Yeah I am really smart I hate smart Asses but I love being one ha
"…Go on" said Stan
"Look just talk to her get to really know her hell right her an anonymous love note girls love mysteries and when she finds out who its from her panties will be so wet she wont bother asking questions she will practically be in your pants" I said
Kyle and Stan got their catfish and shrimp and left then it was the weird pervert that I ran into last week great
"Hello sexy how's your day been" asked Kenny
"Lousy it sucks and you're here so it's worse," I said
"Ouch that burned you really hold a grudge over a silly joke" said Kenny
"Yes you see me as a sex object yes I like sex but I don't think about it 24/7" I said
Kenny then just walked away without buying his food
"HEY KENNY WHAT ABOUT YOUR SEAFOOD" I yelled
"Can't afford it" said Kenny
"Its on the house I think paying for lunch is stupid especially sense I worked my ass of cooking it" I said
Kenny then took the food and ate some of it
"Holy shit that's good especially the rice I didn't think you can make rice with flavor" said Kenny
"4 years in Japan learning how to cook helps," I said
Yeah in middle school I went to Japan every summer and learned from the best sushi chief ever I could make shit taste good. Kenny left and sat with the boys and I finished serving for the day sense this is D lunch and I was exhausted but the positive side of cooking for 15 meals and 15000 kids is the pay KICKS ASS I mean damn 1500 a months ha I wish I got that with my last job I will be buying my restaurant in about 3 years if I keep making this cash…. maybe by then I will share it with someone
Matts P.O.V
"Kyle I want to make it up to you how about dinner my treat" I said
"Wow free dinner hell maybe you can hit first base" said Kenny
"Really Kenny" said Stan
"What he could," said Kenny
"Ok but you have to help me get with bebe ok" said Kyle
"DEAL I can make a few calls and get you a date" I said
"No I mean to get her to fall head over heals for me by delivering my love notes to her locker for the next 4 months" said Kyle
Wow ok lets get things straight I score with a hot piece of ass and now I am his slave because I offered to be nice cause I didn't know he liked her so its not my fault its his he should of said "hey by the way bebe is off limits" damn if he said that I might of gone after red instead…wait never mind she just came out of the restroom with guy pants so yeah DYKE haha
"Ok fine but remember it aint my fault ok I didn't know you liked her" I said
"Ha you seem to be doing that will girls ever sense you moved here," said Stan
"Yeah I know seriously sorry about that," I said
"Look it wasn't your fault hell guilt is on my side she will make it up to me someday I wonder if red minds a 3 way" said Stan
"Oh no shes not going to sleep with you" said red
"Woops" said Kyle
"Ok it was a joke red I am sorry," said Stan
"What ever just cause I am a dyke doesn't mean I will screw any girl in the school plus guys repulse me," said red
"Ehh there not THAT BAD" said nana
"Ha yeah what ever" said red
The 2 girls kept arguing over which is better girls or guys (man if she is trying to hide that she is a lesbian she aint doing a good job)
"Well howdy cartman," said butters
"God damnit butters stop talking to me" said cartman
Asshole
"Oh butters you accidentally left your boxers on the kitchen floor," I said
"Hahaha wow I didn't know butters was your type," said a random kid
"He's his roommate," said nana
"What ever" said the kid?
Bebe walked by and I remembered not to brag and also not to brag cause of Kyle
"Faggot why can't you all just go away" said the kid
His name sounds like Jeff or jimmy yeah he has crutches but he doesn't stutter as much like his old friends used to say he did but after middle school he became a dick
"I'm not fucking gay," I said
"Yeah you are you just said butters lives with yaw and he is gay as a rainbow at a pony convention" said jimmy
"He's not gay he scored with bebe last night" said Kyle
"Yeah he did with me and hell he was probably better then you jimmy so how about you shut up and go before you fall over," said bebe
He walked away in a huff and I whispered to Kyle
"Thanks man I promise I will get you with her" I said
Then my phone went off
IM SAILING AWAY
"Oh hold on hello," I said
Next thing you know…cartmans singing
"I'm sailing away
set an open course for the Virgin Sea
'Cause I've got to be free
Free to face the life that's ahead of me"
"uhh whats wrong with him" I asked
"On board, I'm the captain
So climb aboard
We'll search for tomorrow on every shore
And I'll try, oh Lord, I'll try to carry on" continued cartman
"hahaha he has something where if he hears come sail away he has to sing the entire song" said Kyle
"I look to the sea
Reflections in the waves spark my memory
Some happy, some sad
I think of childhood friends and the dreams we had" said cartman
"ha who sang it" asked craig
"my phone rang that's my ring tone" I said
then I descided to sing cause it's a kick ass song
"I look to the sea
Reflections in the waves spark my memory
Some happy, some sad
I think of childhood friends and the dreams we had" I said
"ah great another cartman" said Kyle
then nana and red started singing
"We lived happily forever
So the story goes
But somehow we missed out on the pot of gold
But we'll try best that we can to carry on" said the 2 girls
"oh well I guess cant beat them join them" said kenny
stan and Kyle also agreed
"A gathering of Angels appeared above my head
They sang to me this song of hope and this is what they said" said the 3
then we all started singing the rest of the song
"They said, "Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me lads
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me baby
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me"
I thought that they were Angels, but to my surprise
We climbed aboard their starship, we headed for the skies
Singing, come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me lads
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me"
The entire lunch room had a mixture of laughs and applauds….then cartman punched me in the gut and told me never to play that fucking song again then nana sucker punched him in the face and we all got detention
Yeah it was worth it
END OF CHAPTER
Yeah I don't own styx but I love that song and cartman singing it made me laugh my ass off its from the episode cartmans mom is still a whore check it out it's a good episode
