Disclaimer: Still don't own anything..
Author's Note: First off, I want to apologize for the extremely long delay! I wanted to get this up as soon as I could to reward you all for the amazing reviews.. but, as you can see, that didn't work out too well. Just know that I appreciate the feedback more than anything, and I'll try to do better next time! Thanks to TypoKween for the birthday/graduation wishes! I think that you and some others will be quite pleased with one particular event in this chapter.. Oh, and I'd like to apologize in advance for an extremely dramatic Lucas.. haha. Oh, and to clear up all confusion, this is a Brathan story. Brucas and Naley will have their moments, but the primary ship is Brooke/Nathan. I hope that doesn't repel anyone. hahaha. Okay, well don't forget to drop a review, because they seriously do make my day! Now.. on with the story..
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Brooke hated being alone. It didn't matter if she was living with Rachel, Haley, or Karen. Hell, even Peyton was preferable to complete and utter detachment. Her parents were scarcely around while she was growing up. Consequently, she had learned to treasure companionship more than anything. Perhaps this was why she would walk to Peyton's house everyday just to ensure that her favorite friend hadn't forgotten about her.. or why, years later, her friendliness had earned her a new reputation- one that her parents, had they ever paid the slightest bit of attention to her life, would not have been proud of.
The fact that she was now legally an adult didn't change a thing. Waking up in the apartment that she had recently reclaimed, Brooke was saddened that there was no one around to eat breakfast with.. or to share her dreams with.. or to fight over the bathroom with..
This was why she was so pleasantly surprised when she opened her door that morning to find Lucas Scott and a box of donuts. She was quick to greet him. Once they were both settled on a kitchen stool, she was also quick to dismiss the fact that she was technically on a diet.
It had been over a week since she moved in, and yet various boxes still claimed most of the floor space. She frowned when Lucas shook his head disapprovingly.
"Are we really going to do this right now, Luke?" she said, exasperated. "It's 10 o'clock in the morning."
"No." Lucas relented. "I didn't come here to argue with you." He got up and maneuvered to the refrigerator, skillfully weaving through the boxes.
"Then why did you come here?" Brooke replied, deciding that there really was no nice way of putting that. "This is the third morning in a row that you've joined me for breakfast." she continued, her voice softening. "Is it Peyton? Is she sending you over here to fatten me up?" she motioned to the chocolate-covered donut in her hand and laughed. "Seriously, Luke. What's up?"
Lucas poured himself a glass of milk. It wasn't usually his choice beverage, but it was the only item in her refrigerator. He had bought it for her yesterday. He wondered how many mornings- how many boxes of donuts and glasses of milk- it would take before he would finally gain the courage to confront her about what he had overheard. "Nothing." he finally said. "I just thought you could use the company."
Judging by the fact that he had just blown the perfect opportunity, it would be a while..
"Well thank you, Lucas. I really do appreciate it." she replied, revealing her signature dimples. "I probably wont appreciate it when I'm the heaviest girl at fashion school.." she went on, debating whether or not she should finish off the second half of her donut. "Maybe tomorrow you'll spring for fruit and yogurt?" she took one last bite before carelessly dropping the remainder in the trash can.
"You got it." He hoisted himself up onto the counter top with ease. "Pretty girl."
She smiled at the nickname. "Yeah, well if you keep bringing me donuts, I'll be breaking-the-scale girl."
The two smiled and it remained this way until the door opened and a head full of blonde curls came into the picture. It was Peyton, obviously. She entered carrying a brown, paper bag. "Hey Brooke.. I don't mean to barge in like this, but-" she stopped when her eyes landed on Lucas. "What are you doing here?" she said, unsuccessfully attempting to conceal her displeasure.
"Donut?" Brooke offered the box to Peyton, who abruptly shook her head. Clearly, Brooke's attempt to ease the tension had also failed.
"We were just having breakfast." Lucas replied, hopping down from the counter to greet her. What he hoped would be swift movement transformed into awkward dodging of boxes. He settled for a wave.
"Well then I guess it's a good thing I brought fruit and yogurt." Peyton said, retrieving the items from the bag. Though she was clearly still uneasy, she relaxed a bit at the mention of breakfast.
"Did you bring orange juice?" Brooke asked, slowly.
"No."
"I-uh.. I need orange juice, I'm sorry. I'll just run to the store real quick and get some." As obvious as it may have been, Brooke sensed that the not-so-happy couple needed to "talk". "You two make yourselves at home. You know.. what's mine is yours. You're familiar with that, right Peyton?" After all this time, Brooke still could not resist the cheap shots. "I'll be back."
Peyton waited until Brooke was out the door and in her car to break the ice. "So.." she began, plastering on a fake smile. "You've been visiting Brooke?"
Lucas opened his mouth to speak just as Brooke was starting her car. Peyton shifted her weight uncomfortably. "Well.." Peyton raised an eyebrow at this. "Yeah." he finished. "Are you okay with that?"
"I don't know." she replied, setting down the grocery bag and moving toward him. "How many times have you been here?"
His eyes cast downward. "Four or five."
Her blue eyes widened. "Four or five?" she repeated. "She's barely been here a week. You don't return my calls, but somehow you find the time to visit your ex-girlfriend four or five times?"
"She needs her friends right now, Peyton." He replied, calmly. "I'm just trying to help her out."
"That may be true, but I need my boyfriend right now. I'm tired of having a relationship with your answering machine." Peyton knew that she was walking on thin ice and that she should stop if she had any interest of keeping her boyfriend, but all of her built-up anger and frustrations were impossible to deny.
"I'm sorry-"
"Don't even bother apologizing if you plan on making the same mistakes again." she took a deep breath. "I know you're trying to be a good friend to Brooke, and I love you for it, Luke.. I really do. I just need you to focus on me right now. Can you do that?" she felt tears welling up in her eyes as she was fearful for his response.
Following her rant was a ridiculously long silence. Lucas stared at the floor, deep in thought. Peyton stared at Lucas. His eyes finally met hers. At this point, she had no idea what to expect.
"I love you, Peyton." he said, softly. "There's always been a connection between us, and.." he paused. "I really can't believe I'm doing this, because part of me really believed that we'd be together forever.."
"It's Brooke, isn't it?" Peyton replied, making no effort to hide her tears, for she knew it would be impossible to do.
"I don't know." Lucas replied, honestly. "Maybe it is Brooke.. maybe I haven't met her yet. I'm not ruling anything out.."
"Right.." Peyton said, sadly. "Besides me?"
"It's complicated." he replied. "We were both so young when we fell for each other.. I just think that maybe we were too caught up with the concept of love to realize that there could be something else out there." he sighed. "Not only that, but our relationship hurt so many people. I don't know if I'll ever forgive myself for driving you and Brooke apart.. or for hurting my brother."
"Nathan and Haley never would have happened if it weren't for us." Peyton pointed out. "He would still be a self-righteous bastard, and Brooke.." she wiped ferociously at her tears. "It changed her for the better."
"I don't have any regrets." he replied. "We all changed because of it.. and that's part of the reason why I can't be with you anymore."
If possible, her heart sank even more. She had given up so much to be with him..
"I love you." he repeated, and she hated him for saying it. The words contained so much finality. It killed her.
"I love you, too." she replied. "I love you so much, Lucas.. that if and when you decide that this was a mistake.. I'll take you back, no questions asked."
With that, she turned on her heel and retreated from the room, wishing so desperately that he would stop her.. but he never did.
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Brooke returned and was surprised to find a completely vacant apartment. Finally, the perfect opportunity to unpack. She laughed quietly as she was quick to dismiss the thought. Instead, she withdrew a bottle of vodka from the brown, paper bag resting in her arm. She had bribed the guy at the liquor store. She eyed the jug of orange juice in her other hand.. time for a mid-morning screwdriver. Of course, the doorbell rang before she was able to see this task through.
She slowly walked toward the door. Lucas and Peyton had already graced her with their presence. By process of elimination, the surprise visitor must be.. "Naley!" she exclaimed upon opening the door.
The sight that she had formerly thought to be so comforting now made her slightly uneasy. Nathan and Haley stood, hand-in-hand, at her doorstep. Haley's protruding stomach demanded all attention. This was why it took Brooke so long to notice the frown on her friend's face. "What's up?" her face fell. She panicked. Did they know? Did Peyton tell them? Had Brooke finally provoked the bitch to her breaking point?
"Lucas and Peyton broke up."
A blind man could see Brooke's face mend into one of relief. After receiving a pair of odd looks, she attempted a sad face.
"It's so out of the blue.." Haley stepped into the apartment and, Brooke couldn't help but notice, pulled Nathan along as if he were a helpless puppy. "Do you know what happened?"
Although her words were spoken kindly, Brooke knew it was nothing short of a sugar-coated accusation. Two could play this game.
"Gosh, I don't know, Haley." she said in her sweetest voice possible. "Maybe they realized that the ex-girlfriend doesn't care and is not going to go all out on an investigation?"
Okay, so maybe they weren't exactly playing the same game?
Though her eyes were locked with Haley's, she could see Nathan cracking a smile out of the corner of her eye.
"I'm sorry." Haley finally said. "I just hope it's not awkward now.. the five of us hanging out together.."
Brooke slowly nodded. "Right." she responded. "Because it wasn't awkward for me.. being the fifth wheel or anything?"
Brooke immediately felt guilty at the sight of Haley's expression. She was acting like a bitch, and she knew it. She sighed and took a deep breath. She needed to explain herself.
"I'm sorry, Haley," she said. "but this news... doesn't really affect me. I'm not going to cry myself to sleep, nor am I going to pounce on Lucas the first chance I get." she risked a glance at Nathan and was surprised to see relief written on his face. Could she be mistaking? She hoped not. "I'm over it." she finished, her eyes still locked with his.
Her trance was soon disrupted when Haley's cell phone went off and an obnoxious buzzing sound filled the apartment. Haley was forced to break her apparent death grip on Nathan's hand in order to answer it. Brooke smiled at this.
"Hello?" Haley said, somewhat importantly, into her phone. "No, don't be ridiculous.." she paused. "Of course, Nathan and I will be right over."
Brooke frowned. Did Nathan not have a mind of his own? Could he not speak for himself? Maybe he didn't want to go? Maybe he wanted to stay with her? Maybe ... she was losing her fucking mind.
"That was Peyton." she informed them. "Baby, we've gotta go." she reattached her hand to Nathan's and tugged gently. "She needs us."
"Emo music and half-naked drawings of my brother.." Nathan said, speaking for the first time since their arrival. "How lucky am I?"
"Pretty damn lucky." Haley responded. "Because if you make it through today, you might just see a half-naked wife in your bed tonight."
Nathan's mouth dropped as Brooke's eyes widened in horror. "Okay, married couple.. keep it PG, if you will?" she nudged Haley. "Since when did you start sounding like me?"
Haley laughed in response, categorizing the question as reciprocal. "We'll see you later, Brooke."
"Thanks for stopping by." she said, opening the door for them. "...and for that lasting visual image." she finished upon closing it.
She was only halfway across the room, fully intent on returning to her vodka, when there was yet another knock on her door. "What the hell does a girl gotta do to finish a drink around here?" She said, looking skyward. She sighed before turning around and, again, making her way toward the door.
"Lucas?" she said upon opening the door. "What are you doing here?" she gently pulled him inside.
"I broke up with Peyton." he replied, wasting no time with formalities.
"I know, and I'm sorry, but-" she stopped. "Wait.. you broke up with her?"
He nodded, absentmindedly fiddling with the drawstring of his basketball shorts.
"Why?" she managed to say through her shock. "I mean.. I know that she's an emo bitch, but I thought that the two of you had an 'emotional connection.'" Upon realizing that the air quotes weren't helping any, Brooke immediately placed her hands on her slender hips.
"I thought we did." he replied. "But we're in high school." Brooke nodded along, and so he continued. "Investing that much in a high school relationship? You're just setting yourself up for disappointment."
"Damn." Brooke replied, laughing in spite of herself. "I wish that someone would've told us two years ago that neither of us would end up with you." she shook her head. "It would've saved a lot of trouble."
Lucas didn't laugh. In fact, he wore one of the most intense expressions Brooke had ever seen.
"Lucas..." she started. She knew where this was going.. and she knew where this would ultimately end: nowhere.
"I think we should try to work things out." he said before she could stop him.
A few months ago, Brooke would have readily agreed.. if for nothing else than to get back at Peyton. Things were different now. Brooke didn't know if she was a better person for seeing the error in her ways or a worse person for being so hopelessly in love with Lucas' brother. Either way, neither of these excuses would help her out now. "Didn't you just say that high school relationships were a waste of time?" she said, somewhat pathetically.
"That's not what I meant.." he said, taking a step closer. She responded by automatically taking a step back. He frowned. "It was a waste of time for me to think that I had found my soul mate when I was sixteen." he explained. "But hanging out with a cute, funny cheerleader?" A small smile appeared on her face, and he took this opportunity to close the gap between them. "That was not a waste of time. Being with you was the best time of my life. We had fun together.. We can have that again, Brooke."
Brooke considered this for a moment. They really did have fun together.. but getting back together with Lucas, she decided, would be taking the easy way out. She had been doing that her entire life. Everything had always been handed to her on a silver platter. And now a gorgeous guy stood before her, begging for a chance, and in return offered what seemed to be the solution to all of her problems.. It just wouldn't be fair. Lucas would simply serve as a distraction from her loneliness.. and her infatuation with Nathan.. Though she wanted to, she couldn't hide behind him forever. The temporary distraction would not make her problems disappear.
"I can't." she said, softly. She risked a glance at him and consequently ended up drinking in his entire appearance.. his flawless physique.. his baby blue eyes that were begging with her to reconsider.. Damn.. She deserved a medal or something.. The right thing was hard to do.
"Why not?" Lucas replied, challenging her to confess what he already knew.
She crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. Though the lying was taking an obvious toll on her, the one thing Brooke Davis knew how to do was stand her ground. "It's just ... I can't be in a relationship with a guy that can't make up his fucking mind." Her words were spoken sweetly through clenched teeth ... as if she were threatening a two-year-old.
Lucas opened his mouth, most likely about to defend himself, but Brooke intervened.
"Let's see ... Are you pining for Peyton or boning for Brooke? Would you like orange juice or coffee? Boxers or briefs?" she raised an eyebrow, acknowledging his challenge and daring him to see it through.
Lucas was no stranger to Brooke's games. Yet, he could not bring himself to vocalize his worst fear. Instead, he decided to follow through with his original plan. "I'm boning for Brooke." he said, lamely. She raised an eyebrow at this. "Your words, not mine." he sighed, somehow he was managing to not get his point across and make an ass out of himself at the same time. He ran a hand through his shaggy, unkempt hair ... mentally planning a regroup. "Look.. what I'm trying to say is.. I know that I've been a bit uncertain in the past.."
Brooke scoffed. "Understatement of the year?"
"Right." he replied. "But I know now.. I'm the guy for you, Brooke Davis."
Brooke's mind flashed back to a time when that line literally floored her. But now? She was just annoyed that he lacked either the creativity or the drive to think of something new. For someone who was aspiring to be an author, this truly was disappointing. "You've said that before. How do I know that you mean it this time?"
"You're just going to have to trust me."
Again... real original. "I've tried that.. twice. And it came back to bite me in the ass. For all I know, 'trust me' actually means 'I'm gonna go suck face with Peyton.'"
"Brooke..."
"I mean, if history has a way of repeating itself.." she interrupted.
"Brooke, please.."
He was begging with her, she knew, because he really was sorry.. because he wanted another chance.. because he loved her? No matter what the extent, Brooke only found herself growing increasingly annoyed with his persistence. "Lucas.." she said, resisting the urge to snap at him. "It's not going to work, okay?"
There was a moment of silence before Lucas finally nodded. He backed away from her and headed for the doorway. It seemed as though he was going to accept this ... that he was going to walk away no questions asked ... but then he stopped dead in his tracks, and Brooke knew that whatever he had to say would not be good.
"I just hope you're not holding out for my brother."
"What?" Brooke choked. Her mind was racing. How did he know? Was it Peyton? Of course.. it had to be. If so, she was one dead bitch..
"I overheard you and Peyton talking." The intense expression on his face told her that he wasn't bluffing. "I know about the abortion, too."
"I-I didn't.. I don't-" Brooke spat out one incoherent sentence after another, and Lucas knew that he had finally gained the control he had been longing for since the moment he had first met Brooke Davis.
His expression softened a bit at the sight before him. Brooke was a mess. He had never seen her this way before. How could he treat her this way just moments after declaring his love for her? "I'm not going to tell Nathan." he said, softly. The words had barely left his lips before Brooke's arms were wrapped around him. "Thanks, Luke! It's like I was trying to tell Peyton.. It would only end up hurting-" she stopped when she saw the look on his face. "You are." he finished.
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Brooke sat on her doorstep, staring at the ground and listening for Nathan's car. Basically, Lucas had given her an ultimatum. If she didn't tell Nathan about the abortion, he would. Brooke had pegged it as revenge.. as Lucas' immature way of getting back at her for turning him down. He had, of course, claimed otherwise. "I'm just trying to do the right thing." he had said.
Lucas had watched as her trembling hands dialed Nathan's number. He was at Peyton's still, but more than willing to leave early on her account. And with Nathan on the way, Lucas made an overdue exit.
Brooke was furious with Lucas for making her do this.. but perhaps even more furious with herself for not doing it sooner.
Her head shot up at the sound of an engine. It was, in fact, Nathan Scott. He climbed out of his car. If possible, he was taller and even more handsome then she remembered. She nearly broke down when he smiled at her. She didn't deserve that. She had unfairly mapped out his entire future for him. He was going to hate her, and she couldn't even blame him.
"First of all, thank you for saving me." he said, joining her on the doorstep.
Despite her current state, she managed a smile. She liked the sound of that. "From what?"
"Let's just put it this way.. I'm on a bed with two hot girls, and I'm bored."
She laughed. Here she was literally falling apart at the seam ... and Nathan somehow had the capability to make her laugh. She stopped when she reminded herself of the task at hand. "Nathan.." she said, slowly.. painfully. "We need to talk."
"Okay." he wore a calm expression, though deep down he was alarmed. He couldn't place it, but he knew that there was something very wrong.
She cleared her throat. This was it. After this, Nathan would most likely never want to see her again. 'The truth will set you free' ... Yeah, free to be miserable. "Nathan, um.. Do you remember a couple years ago when we, uh.. when we had-"
"Sex?" Nathan finished for her. "Not really. But I'm sure it was awesome."
She smiled in spite of herself. Why did he have to be so cute and funny? Why couldn't he just be the clueless asshole he was two years ago? It would make this a lot easier.. "Yeah." she replied. "Well, um.. there's something else that I didn't tell you about-"
Suddenly, Nathan's cell phone went off. She gave him a puzzled look as he reached for it apologetically. "Sorry.. hold that thought."
Brooke initially couldn't decide whether the interruption was a good thing or a bad thing, but once she heard Nathan's frantic voice, she knew that it was definitely a bad thing.
"Peyton, calm down ... Well, is she okay?" he was on his feet and pacing nervously at this point. "Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can." he snapped his phone shut and turned to Brooke. "It's Haley.. and the baby.. I have to go."
She nodded. "I'm coming with you."
Though Brooke knew she wasn't permanently off the hook, her priorities were quick to alter as her fear of telling Nathan was soon replaced with concern for her best friend. She had initially thought that this day would be the death of her. And now, as she sat living and breathing in Nathan's car.. she wondered if someone else wasn't.
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Review ... please??!
