Disclaimer: ... duh...

A/N: This is redone, anyone like?

Marauders Trust

Crystal

I'm so tired right now. The train and a couch sound so good. I enjoy sleeping on the train as it rocks gently back and forth. I looked for a cabin to sit in and found one with someone already in it. His clothes were very baggy and he looked a little thin, but at the moment, alert. His hair was short, brown and a little messy and his eyes spoke of a lot of tales.
"Um... excuse me... can I sit here?" I asked, and he looked up at me, only to give a shocked gasp. He searched my face for a long moment before opening his mouth to speak.
"Cat? Oh my word, is that you?" he asked me. "I must know…but you had died… my word…"
"My name is Crystal Umi Riyusaki," I replied, "Who are you?" He blinked twice and then seemed to compose himself.
"My name is Remus Lupin, are you saying you don't know who I am?" he asked, "I'm sure you're her, but you died!" He searched my face once again and looked me over. It didn't make me feel uncomfortable but should I know him? Is he some part of my past that I don't remember?
"I don't remember..." I muttered and sat down, "I mean... you seem so familiar... but I don't remember much of anything." I didn't really remember anything…all I had at all to tell me anything were some flashbacks and I didn't know how to sort through all of them.
"But you know I'm not a bad person, which is why you began to talk to me in the first place, right?" he asked, and I found myself nodding slowly, taking in what he was saying. If I had heard him right...

flash

"Um... hi," I said shyly. The boy looked at me strangely, I knew who he was…but I wanted to get to know him better.
"Hi," he said, "What do you want?" His clothes were a little torn and his hair was a little messy. It always was.
"My name is
KatyForest, pleased to meet you," I replied, "I mean, we've talked a little but your friends always showed up so we never really had a proper introduction."
"Oh, that's all? Well... my name is Remus Lupin," he replied, "But you won't want to know me too well."
"Yes I do! There's something about you I like!" I giggled. "I knew it from when I first saw you…but your friends are so distracting…that and that Sirius guy keeps hitting on me."
"You... no one's ever said that before to me," he said, "Okay... but..."
"I'm a psychic... still in training, and I know people like you," I said, "And you're the best of them all, aren't you?" I meant that in a friendly way, like he was warmer than others like him, better. I knew men like him driven mad by what they had become, or at least heard many stories, not all of them pleasant. I met him in his first year. The portals were connected to this world, so I visited often, and Lily, I was going to say hi, but I ran into Remus instead. He was neat, unique; I didn't sense anything dangerous about him, rather the opposite.

flash

"Remus... Remus Lupin..." I said after sitting down, "I do remember... something... when... we first met...and really talked a little." It seemed so real but I didn't, I mean I still couldn't tell if these memories were mine or not.
"You do?" he asked, "Is that all?"
"For the moment... yes," was all I could reply. He stood, nearly knocking over his suitcase and hugged me.
"Everyone thought you... you had truly died," he said, "The ministry was so cruel to your memories and everything… Severus was distraught, and Lily fell apart, James and..."
"James and who?" I asked.
"Sirius..." he said, as if uncertain.
"There was a Sirius Black who escaped from a prison this summer, are they the same person? I heard about him on the news," I said innocently, "is it true that he killed a lot of people?"
"Cat... sorry, Crystal... can I call you Chris? Well... Sirius was the secret keeper for Lily and James..." he began and he told me how he believed Sirius had betrayed the Potters to Voldemort. I listened to this sad story. But then he told me how it seemed hard to believe, because James and Sirius were the best of friends.

flash

"Okay, we're gonna form a group... it's gonna only be us..." James said, "We need nicknames... and an official name." I listened through the hole in the wall.
"Well, you... you... Remus... you're a werewolf," Sirius said, thinking for a moment, "You better be... let's see... Moony!"
"Hey, that's a good one. My animangus animal is starting to look like... a rat," Peter said quietly, "Can I be called... Wormtail?" I had to stifle a giggle.
"Well, mine's a stag, so I shall call myself Prongs," James said proudly.
"Well, I may be an ordinary brown dog, but you can all call me Padfoot!" Sirius said, and grinned as if he had the best name of all.
"Well, that's settled, but we need a group name," James said, "Any ideas?"
"We cause trouble, we sneak around, and we're smart," Sirius said, "and we know this school better than Dumbledore, I bet that's a fact."
"How... how about the Marauders, does that sound like a good name?" Remus asked timidly.
"The Marauders? Actually, I like the sound of that, it has quite the ring to it in my opinion," James said, "Great thinking Moony!" I smiled. The name was original; I gave him credit for that. Moony was a good nickname for Remus too, suited him well. I kinda liked it too.
"Marauders, marauders, what have you been up to? What trouble shall you cause? Whose lives shall you change? Marauders, marauders, friends at their best... but one shall betray you... and then the group will be changed evermore, for there will be only three on my side, when there were originally...four," I chanted under my breath, a prediction for the future... Although where it came from was beyond me. I hated divination; I wasn't even planning on taking that class. Visions from the future disturbed me to no end, and whatever I had just said I planned to keep to my self from now on.
"Hey, did you guys hear that?" Remus asked and moved toward where I hid. I quickly disappeared into the darkness, their secret kept safe with me...

flash

"Marauders, marauders, what will you do now? How will you live now that one betrayed the other to die?" I asked, not even knowing what I was saying. I felt like I had done it before, an unconscious desire to say it.
"What did you say?" Remus asked.
"What did I say?" I asked, not even knowing what I just did.
"You talked about the marauders," Remus said cautiously, "And how one betrayed the others to die..." He looked at me with the most puzzled expression on his face, something of a mix between confusion and sadness…although both expressions puzzled me.
"I did? I'm sorry," I said, and stood up and began to walk out of the room. "I didn't mean to, I don't know. I just…it's just these things keep happening to me and I don't know why, I keep getting these flashbacks and I don't know if they're really mine."
"Wait, Cat, no, sorry Crystal!" he said, "There's... still so much I need to know..."
"Then talk to me when I remember more... I'm of little use to you now. You seem like a nice guy," I whispered and walked out of the room, "And when I can understand myself what it is I am doing..."
"Then find yourself again Cat," I heard him whisper as I shut the door. "Find yourself and come back to us."

Remus

I could tell it was her, of that fact I was more than certain. Not once had she been able to fool me, memory or no memory. If Sirius found out she was alive, how would he react? He'd either be stunned, surprised, upset or entirely neutral. He was like that once or twice, I think. Did Severus know she had been reborn? I sort of hope he didn't, it would be really hard on him if she didn't remember. I hope Dumbledore realized that before reenrolling her into Hogwarts. I sat down again and closed my eyes. Sleep, that was what I needed, sleep to get over the shock and the joy of seeing her alive again. Wait, didn't she say that only one was dead? I thought Pettigrew was also dead...he had died at the hands of Sirius, meaning two would have died. I couldn't understand what she meant, and I knew it meant something significant, even if it didn't to her.

Crystal

He may be an odd person, but he's a great teacher! I mean Professor Lupin. I didn't exactly think he was a student... but I didn't know if he was a teacher or not, it was entirely possible. I mean, Dumbledore told me I was like…old enough to be a teacher or something but that's besides the point I guess now. Professor Lupin is our Defense against the Dark Arts teacher, and he's the best one we've had so far, at least in the three years now I've been here. Everyone else thinks so to. Hands on experience are just what we needed and we learn a lot more that way. That boggart was amazing, I mean, the way he fought it off with the best of us. And then there was Severus in that dress? I was laughing for the rest of the week. However, he wouldn't let Harry or I tackle the boggart. I kinda knew why he wouldn't let Harry... but me? I couldn't remember my fear... is that why he didn't let me attempt it? For fear of my subconscious actually summoning up my darkest fear? How could I be afraid of something I don't remember? Oh, and I'm looking forward to the Hogsmeade weekend coming up. I don't ever remember being there, although I know I should feel like I have. I heard from Fred and George about a joke shop, and it sounds like I could find something good in there...

Crystal some time later

I couldn't tell, was it's fur black or was it's fur brown? I knew it was a dog, I just can't remember the color of its fur. I saw a dog out in the stands during one of the Quidditch matches, so I instinctively went up to it. It was sitting by itself, all alone, and it seemed quite focused on the match. It wasn't the best weather in my opinion. It was pouring down rain… cold shuddering rain and wind. It was crappy weather, even though I didn't mind so much as I thought I would. I think I could see my breath though and probably had icicles on my nose, or at least my ears.
"Hello..." I said to it as I sat down. The dog glanced my way before turning back to the match. I scratched it behind the ears for a minute, which it seemed to enjoy.
'This child acts like Cat would,' it said. Wait a minute; I can hear its thoughts!
"Um... Mr. Dog, your name... what should I call you?" I asked, "I mean... I've always wanted a pet, and I think dogs make great pets!" The dog turned to me the wind whipping through his mangy hair. I longed to take a brush and run it over him. I bet when he cleaned up a bit he would look really good for a dog. Not that he wasn't cute already.
'This girl is nuts! She should know better than to talk to and even think of keeping a stray dog," he panted in his mind. 'Of course, she was no different.' I thought I just heard his thoughts, but I wasn't sure.
"I used to know someone, someone who could change into a dog like you... You remind me of him, even though I don't remember much," I whispered softly.
'What the hell did she just say?' he asked. He looked at me with his eyes, they told a tale of suffering, but they were kind as well. They were so kind.
"Oh well, I guess I won't take you in. I suppose you're probably in trouble already and that would be bad for me, wouldn't it?" I asked, and then walked away towards another spot. The dog watched me for a moment, and then turned away from my gaze.
'If only that were really her...' it trailed off. 'But I wouldn't cause trouble for her, even if she doesn't mind.' I smiled to myself; I might not remember that much, but if that was the Sirius I heard about from Professor Lupin and the Sirius that I heard about in the news... I was more inclined to think he had been framed or something. I wonder what our relationship was like...

And here I was, wasting time pondering the past. I couldn't remember, so I just better move on, right? Shouldn't I? Wouldn't it be better to move on and create new memories? Soon I'll be different, changed, someone other than my past self, right? If I don't get all my memories back I'll have to forge a new life for myself, so I had best get over the past and prepare for life ahead.

FLASH

"Why do you focus on the past so much?" Sev asked me one day.

"I can't forget it, it's embedded in me, a part of me that will never fade away," I replied and smiled. "But that's okay. We learn from past mistakes so we don't make them in the future."

"At least not as often," he replied with a small smile. He looked at me, those black eyes of his glimmering faintly.

"You won't become your father Sev," I whispered.

"Cat, you say that now but how can you be sure?"

"Can't I just be sure and be done with that? I'm sure Sev; you won't be your father. You aren't worthless; you aren't nothing like your father said you were. Besides, I'm here to make sure of that too," I said and his smile widened a little. He looked so much better when he smiled, why couldn't he do that more often?

"If I ever become my father, kill me," he said.

"No, I won't kill you," I said.

"Why not?" he asked me, "Why won't you kill me?"

"It's because then you won't learn, you'll just get an escape from what you've become," I said, "I'll have to make you suffer."
"Like my father made me suffer?" he asked and he saw his words stung me. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean it like that."

"I have my ways," I said after a pause, "No worries there. I promise you I won't hurt you like your father did, I never could, you know this."

"I do, I'm sorry Cat," he said. He touched my cheek lightly with his hand, it was warm and I leaned into it, it was soft and wonderful. He was the best boyfriend anyone could want. I loved him more than anything else in the world.

"I could never hurt my Sev," I said with a laugh, "You obviously don't know me that well then if you'd think I'd hurt you…at least on purpose."

"I get it, I understand," he said and smiled widely, "I love you Cat."

"I know," I whispered and he took me into his arms, and I nuzzled against his neck as he kissed my hair, stroking it lightly. Times like this, full of love and life were something we had to treasure.

FLASH

Sirius

I didn't know who she was. Who that girl was, the one I had seen. She seemed... so warm, familiar, loving... I almost could swear she looked exactly like Cat. She couldn't be though…she had died so long ago!

Crystal some time later

I knew that had to be the dog I heard about in my flashback. It just had to be. I sought out Professor Lupin's office, to see what the hell was going on. I knocked on the door to his office. He wasn't answering. I knocked again, wondering what was going on.
"Professor Lupin? I have some questions," I said into the door frame. There was still no reply. I put my hand on the door knob and turned it slowly, opening it just a crack. I saw a couch, and on that couch a dog. No... It wasn't a dog, it was a werewolf! I mean, I knew the difference from Snape's essay, he had us do one on the difference between a wolf and a werewolf, and I could tell right away.
"Professor is that you?" I asked and the werewolf sat up and looked at me, something like suffering in his eyes. It didn't frighten me at all, I didn't feel any fear. I knew I should though, after Professor Snape's forceful teaching about werewolves, I should be running away. Why wasn't I?
'How am I going to tell her she should get out of here?' he was thinking. I went into the room and quickly shut the door.
"I know what you are... and if you think I am who I might be, you can't hurt me..." I said and sat down next to the werewolf.
'She has a point,' he said and then lied down, head in my lap, 'I mean, she was reborn with her Protector of Forest powers, so I can't really do anything.' I scratched him behind the ears a bit. His fur wasn't so bad, although it wasn't really fluffy or anything that was like that.
"I can hear the thoughts of some animals," I began and I felt his state of shock, "And I think their emotions. I was with this dog during the last Quidditch match, and I could hear its thoughts. It was scary, but... it looked like a dog I had heard about... in a flashback..." I gave it a minute to see if Remus understood.
'And so you saw Sirius,' he responded, 'He didn't try to hurt you?' I shook my head.
"Nope, he did nothing of a sort," I said. "He was in a sense a perfect gentleman. Of course, he was a dog so I don't know what that would be called…" I could've swore Professor Lupin smiled at that.
'I guess he thought you acted like you used to act,' he said. I found this kind of funny in a way. Here I was, in a teacher's office, who was a werewolf in the first place and he had his head in my lap and I was scratching behind his ears and I didn't even truly remember who he was.

It felt like it was okay though. Like I had done this so many times before... I felt secure for once. It was really kinda nice. In the past few years that I have been here, I never felt this comfortable. Of course, it was still funny that I was most comfortable with a werewolf in my lap, but I didn't mind it... I think...
"Professor, could you... tell me more about my past?" I asked and Remus sat up and looked at me, and then nodded. A look crossed his face and I was willing to bet he was considering how much he would actually tell me at the present time.
'Not everything... but what might help you understand some... some more of what is going on now... So much has changed,' he said, 'So much has changed Cat.'

Remus

Well, I managed to explain to her about the Marauders and when I questioned her about what she had said on the train, she said she didn't know why. I then guessed it might have been some form of her past self expressing herself in the present before she was able to return. Crystal looked at me with crossed eyes and then I looked away and used the excuse that it was probably her psychic powers that made that prediction or saying or whatever it was. Whatever it could be...

Some time later Again Crystal

Sirius... he's been captured... I can't believe it. I read about the Dementor's kiss and I can only imagine how horrible it will be to loose one's own soul. I'm feeling a distinct feeling of fear from my past self in a way, maybe she encountered them before. They must be horrible.
"Miss Riyusaki?" A voice said behind me. I turned around to see Remus.
"You should go and see him," he said.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Go and see Sirius... before you know..." Remus looked away from me.
"Why?" I asked.
"So he knows you... you're alive... so he can... stop worrying about you and whether you'd come back or not," Remus said.
"What the hell happened in that shack?" I asked.
"If you go and see him, I promise I'll tell you later," he said, "Here, I'll take close to where he is and instruct you from there."
"But how can I say or do something if I don't remember?" I asked.
"You remember more than what you think, you just don't seem to realize it. And one more thing, to know he is true in everything he says, get him to say your name," he said.
"But... what name?" I asked, "I... I mean, wouldn't he know my name?"
"Well... you're a member of the dragon clan, given a name from birth, and it's a special name," and then he noticed my expression, "It's cheesy, but it's meant to test friends and their truthfulness. I mean to say, if Sirius can say your name properly, then he is telling the truth after that, after everything he says, or is it before? Or is it during?" I glanced at him with a confused look in my eyes.
"Anyways, you need to have him say it at some time," he said, "Now come on!" He began to lead me to where Sirius was. How did he expect me to get into a guarded room?

Crystal

Well, Remus sure knows how to get me into a locked tower room. I saw Sirius laying there on his back, gazing up at the ceiling. He had a blank look on his face, he knew he was going to be worse than dead.
"Hi," I said and he sat up with a startled look on his face.
"What are you doing here? No one's supposed to be here!" he exclaimed, "Wait a moment, you're that girl... aren't you... the one at the Quidditch match!" His eyes looked over me, recognition crossing over his face as he tried to see who I was.
"So I did guess right. You're Sirius Black!" I said, just as stunned. I mean, I wasn't about to believe it until I saw him myself.

"I'm surprised... who are you?" he asked.
"Crystal Umi Riyusaki. Why are you surprised?" I asked back.
"You look so much like her," he said, "Miss Riyusaki. I suppose you know all about me then."
"I've truly only heard good things and some speculation..." I trailed, "Are you a Marauder?" He looked at me.
"Ahem... yeah... you better sit down and explain why you're here," he said.

Flash

"Katy, I like you a lot," Sirius said.
"You do? Why?" I asked, laughing a bit. "I mean, you've certainly said that before…but you've never really explained why."
"Because you... you're beautiful... independent... you don't have to deal with family that hates you," he said.
"I'm sorry," I said
"Actually, I'm sure it doesn't really count. You don't even have parents," he said.
"Sirius, I just don't know what to say..." I trailed off. "I'm not any of those things; you should hate me or something…"

"But I don't," he whispered, "I don't hate you. You're probably better at handling bad pasts than I am. And without parents, you're better off." He blew an exasperated breath, his hair waving slightly. "And I meant what I said."

Flash

"I'm here, because Remus told me I should be here," I said, explaining in a soft voice.
"Remus thinks I need someone to talk to? Why you? Why'd he have to sneak you in here?" he asked.
"I don't know. Apparently... well, I don't remember everything about my past. I've only been having flashbacks," I said, pretending to admire the hardwood floors.
"Katy... you're Katy, aren't you?" he asked and grabbed me so I faced him. I looked at him, a little surprised.
"I think..." I trailed before he embraced me in a hug and was actually laughing.
"I thought you were dead, we all did, but now you're back," he said and held me close to him.
"I... I don't remember," I said and he let me push him away.
"You don't?" he asked me, "Not anything?"
"Just what I have from all these flashbacks and what people like Dumbledore and Remus have been telling me, and sometimes I say things that I don't know what they mean!" I said and drew my legs up under my chin.
"I'm amazed, Remus sent you to me to cheer me up, which I can say you've done nicely already and now it seems like you're going to blame yourself," he said.
"Blame myself for what?" I asked and he looked at me puzzled.
"Um, never mind that," he said, "You know what's going to happen to me, right?" I looked at him and nodded slowly.
"Yes, I'm so sorry. If I remembered any thing..." I began.
"No, its better you didn't... you see... I just met my godson today, and that more than anything, to know he trusts me, is more precious to me than anything," he said.
"It is?" I asked.
"I'm ready now, because I know he trusts me and you are alive again. I'm ready for whatever the hell fate deals me," he said, "Actually..." He scooted a bit closer. I didn't sense anything bad emanating from him, which was good.
"What?" I asked.
"Katiana Kalabyur Forest," he began. That must be my true name!
"Huh?" I asked, and before I could say more he leaned forward and he kissed me! It wasn't harsh or anything that was bad... It was gentle and sweet and seemed like it was full of longing. I felt myself drawn in and he brushed his hand against my cheek and I felt like I was spiraling down into the wonders of this kiss. He slowly drew himself away, brushing my lips with his, once, twice and then he just held me.

"Katy, I love you and I still love you," he said, "I shall never stop loving you."
"Uh-huh," I replied.
"I don't know why you married Snape and I shall probably never understand why, but he makes you happy and that is important. If he ever mistreated you... you would have punished him. We would have known," he began, "And if he ever wonders about this kiss... it was my fault. I started it and I'm actually proud that I did it. I'll never stop loving you... even in death. I only... I've never married or even dated... you were the only one."
"Then if that's true, why didn't you work harder to keep me?" I asked.

"I couldn't bear to separate you from your heart. If you love something... let it go... if it comes back you, then it was meant to be. If it never returns to you... then it never was meant to be," he said, "I guess that's how it turned out. I hope you remember soon... for Harry, for Remus... for all of us." I didn't want him to die, not now. It was different now; I realized he was a good person and a good man and I... I didn't remember!
"Miss Riyusaki, we have to go now," Remus said softly, walking in.
"Take her Moony, make sure she stays safe," Sirius said and sort of shoved me into Remus's arms. I began to cry, I wanted to know more... He was so kind...
"It wasn't you was it then? You weren't the one that killed all those people?" I asked through my tears.
"No, it wasn't. Remus, take her!" he said and Remus left through the door, "Take her before you both get in trouble. There has to be at least one Marauder alive..."

Crystal Last day of school

"Remus! Remus Lupin please won't you wait!" I called. Remus paused from getting onto the train and looked at me. I was dragging my trunk on its wheels.
"What?" he asked. He told me Sirius was okay, and I was happy. But something still tugged at my mind.
"Remus, you said you'd tell me what happened!" I exclaimed, arriving at his side and panting.
"Well, yes, but why do you have a trunk with you?" he asked.

"Let me... let me come with you... let me stay with you this summer," I said in a huffed breath.
"Why?" he asked.
"I feel like I should. I have to..." I said, "Please understand..." Remus looked at me for a moment, a long hard look. He seemed to be contemplating something for a moment, and then seemed to brush all other doubts aside.
"Very well then... You may stay for the summer. Come on now, onto the train. Actually, I'm quite lonely during the summer, it'll be nice to have some company," he said and beckoned me onto the train. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

A/N: Yeah, a real chapter! Sorry it's so long, but let me know what you think! I hope you enjoyed it, I know... it took me a long time... I apologize... I hope it was worth the wait...