Chapter 7: Believe
She ducks out of the medicine cat's den, checking that Willowshine is asleep before stalking out of camp. Silverpelt gleams above her, daring for her to take a good look at the stars twinkling above her. She keeps her gaze locked on her golden paws.
Reedwhisker gives her a curt nod as she passes, his eyes sparkling with curiosity but knowing that it wasn't his place to ask about a medicine cat's business. She returns it, barely looking at him as she sweeps by. The scent of the nearby stream calms her.
Stopping on a small, soft patch of grass, she sits, finally allowing her amber eyes to slip over the stars. The half moon hangs just above her, reminding her of what she misses this time every moon. She scowls at it, her tail beginning to twitch.
Such a stupid tradition, she thinks. Trekking all the way up to a pool of water to speak with dead cats. Her clanmates speak of StarClan often; thanking StarClan for the prey they catch, saying that StarClan will help them through troubles. It makes her laugh. Dead cats could do nothing to help them; the future of the clans depends on the living.
"So, StarClan, are you once again going to ignore my challenge?" There is a mocking tone in her voice; she knows she's speaking only to the sky. "If you do truly exist, show me!" There is silence, and she sighs. It seems pointless to continue coming here, challenging a clan of cats who do not exist. Shaking her head, she turns tail, running swiftly back to camp.
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"It will be swift and painless," Willowshine promises, though doubt is clearly shown in her eyes. "I owe you as much." Mothwing smiles, pain still coursing through her body. She knows she's dying, as does Willowshine, Mistystar, and the rest of the clan. She is not worried; Willowshine will be a good replacement. Willowshine nudges a bitter smelling plant towards her - she can't recognize it through her pain - and tells her to eat it quickly. She does as she's told, and slowly she feels the pain wearing, a numbness filling her mouth. Willowshine touches her nose to her mentor's forehead.
"StarClan will welcome you with open paws, no matter if you reject them or not," she whispers, though her voice is unsure. Mothwing sighs, content. Her apprentice still believes in her fictional guardians, not that Mothwing had ever tried to change her mind. It's her choice to believe, after all.
She can finally feel herself slip away, and she leaves eagerly. As she seems to step away from her body, she feels strength returning to her old bones, as strong as they had been when she was younger. She stretches, not knowing what to do now.
"Mothwing," She jumps at the voice, and whirls around. Standing in front of her, looking less sickly than he had last time she'd seen him, was Mudfur. Her eyes brighten, and she practically jumps forward, brushing her muzzle against his.
"Mudfur! What are you doing here?" she exclaims, her tail waving back and forth. He holds his chin a bit higher.
"I'm here to see whether you have given up on your doubt of StarClan." Her ears twitch. He's dead; surely he can't still believe that nonsense. She shakes her head.
"If they exist, why aren't we there?" she asks, expecting him to be stumped. He sighs, glancing down.
"Mothwing… I can't let you enter StarClan unless you truly believe." Her ears flatten against her skull.
"But… if the stories are true, then why didn't you answer my challenge?"
"The same reason you never received dreams at the Moonpool; you don't believe in us. We couldn't contact you." She hesitates, thinking over his words, before shaking her head.
"I'm sorry, but I can't help but think this is a trick," she meows, sitting down. Sadness fills her mentor's eyes, and he just shakes his head.
"Very well, I tried." He glances over his shoulder to see a spotted she-cat padding towards them, her head held high. She stops right in front of Mothwing.
"Mothwing… I'm sorry," she meows. Stretching out her muzzle, she touches her nose to Mothwing's forehead, much like Willowshine had done earlier. A strange, sad feeling plummets through Mothwing's stomach. "We can not allow you to enter StarClan. You will shadow the Earth forever more." Leopardstar pulled back, shooting her medicine cat one last, sad glance, before padding away, Mudfur at her heels.
Mothwing watches them go, the meaning of Leopardstar's words sinking in. She gets shakily to her paws, realizing that she could now see through her fur, as though it were just fog. She gasps slightly before taking off towards her old den. Her paws never touch the ground.
Already, her body is lain out in the middle of camp, her clan sharing tongues with their deceased clanmate once more. She skids to a stop, her eyes wide. It's like a dream, seeing her own body. Slowly, she stalks forward, wondering what they are saying to her unhearing ears. She immediately walks toward Willowshine, crouching down next to the young cat.
"I'll meet you again in StarClan, Mothwing," her past apprentice murmurs, flattening a piece of fur that stuck out with her tongue. "They must have accepted you; StarClan gives second chances." Mothwing can't take it. She jumps up, racing away from the words that would haunt her till the end. She had been given a second chance, and she had denied it. She closes her eyes, not caring where she goes.
Her paws take her automatically to the place she had once gone to in younger days. She sits, staring up at Silverpelt above her. As she thinks back now, she realizes that perhaps there is some truth to the stories she had heard nearly all her life.
"All right! I believe you now! StarClan does exist! I believe you!" Her yowls echo around her. "I believe! Please, I want to go to StarClan!" Even to her own ears, her meows sound somewhat hollow, as though doesn't mean them, which she knows in her heart she doesn't. Crouching, she places her paws over her muzzle, feeling her eyes growing wet.
"Please…" she whispers.
There is no answer for her desperate plea.
Ze longest one, yayz :D
Okay, so, Shimmerice requested I do one for Mothwing a while ago, so if you still read it, here you go. Sorry if it's not what you expected. I love Mothwing, I do, but this idea wouldn't leave me alone.
So... love it? Hate it? Reviews, please! Hope you enjoyed!
Disclaimer: I don't own Warriors.
