Drunken Shorties
Cassian walks into Central City.
"Where'd that crazy girl send me?"
"Full Metal, you're too young to drink."
"What?! But I wanna get drunk, Dammit!!"
"You really should listen to your elders, kid."
Ed glares at Cassian. "You're one to talk, brat."
Cassian snarls at Ed. "I'm thirty-five!"
"No, you're not."
"For the love of God! Everyone says tells me, an adult, what to do and how to think! I know I'm stuck in the body of a !#$ing ten years old!"
"They call you short, bean sprout, shrimp, midget, and stuff too?" Ed asks, his eyes wide and innocent (is that even possible?)
"Yes…especially Cassandra."
"Is he anything like the colonel?"
"I don't know."
"I'll take that as a yes."
"Nii-san, I'll see you in a few minutes."
Al leaves. Ed and Cassian look at each other, then around. No one's around.
"Hey, you wanna get drunk and talk about our height issues?"
"To hell with it! Let's just get drunk!" Says Ed.
"Fine by me, kid."
They break into Roy's secret alcohol stash.
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"Vrei sa pleci dar nu-mã, nu-mã ieiNu-mã, nu-mã iei, nu-mã, nu-mã, nu-mã ieiChipul tãu si dragostea din teiMi-amintesc de ochii tãi."
"OH MY GOOOOOD!!!"
"Colonel, what's wrong?"
Roy has just walked in to see a very drunk Ed and Cassian in his office singing Dragostea din Tei, more commonly known as the Numa Numa song.
"What the hell! Edward Elric, we told you your too damn young to drink, and he's just as young! What? Do you want to go to Juvi?" Lt. Hawkeye shouts.
"Jeez, not only is he a stubborn short person, he's an idiot! He even gave a kid alcohol! Well, the hangover they'll have in the morning will teach them," Roy said.
next story: Mary and the Host Club
