Characters: Kevin as the big bad dude guy in that episode. Edd as Ganta. Stocking as Shiro. Buttercup as Makina. Eddy as Yo.
Edd is in the medical room getting the bandage for his cheek.
Nurse Lady Person: And that should do it. I take it you've had your candy yet?
Edd: Candy?
NLP: Yes. Every prisoner is given a piece of candy upon their arrival. It should've been in you duffle bag.
Edd: I didn't get no d*** candy.
Eddy: That was probably me chief. Sorry about that.
Eddy lies in the hospital bed with bandages wrapped around his torso.
Edd: Not you. Can't I just do one chapter without having to occasionally deal with your antics?
Eddy: Nope.
Edd: Fair enough. What's your damage for today?
Eddy: Seriously? You don't remember?
Edd: Remember what?
Eddy: You were there yesterday when it happened.
Edd: I was?
Flashback sequence. Ooooooh, wavy screen change.
Eddy is talking to Buttercup as she tells the newbies what's what in her prison.
Eddy: ... And thats how come they transferred me to here from Arkham.
Buttercup: Everything you just said filled me with great rage. Like when Shaman sees a commercial for Adventure Time.
Eddy: Yeah? What are you going to do about it? Your just a girl.
Buttercup: ...
Buttercup then uses her laser vision on Eddy. Eddy falls to the ground in pain.
Eddy:... Ahahahahahahaha!
Edd: Haha. It's funny cause he's in pain now.
Eddy: Ahahahahahahaha!
Buttercup places her boot on Eddys face.
Buttercup: Let that be a lesson to all of you.
Edd: What is the lesson?
Eddy: The lesson is that Buttercup is a dominatrix and actually makes it work.
Edd: Thats nice.
Eddy: Yeah.
Buttercup: *sigh of relief* Satisfaction.
Back to the hospital room.
Edd: Oh yeah. So your here because of that?
Eddy: No.
Edd: Well then why are you here?
Eddy: I forgot the safety word and she didn't stop in time.
Edd: Oh. Oh! Oh...
Edd backs away a little.
Stocking then climbs out of the air vents startling both of the Eds.
Eddy: Ahahahah! Marshmallows!
Edd: What?
Eddy: Oh. Hey your not Buttercup.
Stocking: I heard there was free candy. Where is it?
Eddy: It ain't free no more. You guys gotta buy it now.
Edd: Prison has a currency?
Eddy: Oh yeah. It's a disgusting, back stabbing, cold hearted way of living. Kinda like New York but if you don't get your candy in three days then you die.
Stocking: I have that problem outside of prison.
Edd: How does one earn the credits needed to purchase these Turkish delights?
Eddy: What?
Edd: How does a guy buy some candy?
Eddy: You have to compete in these games of theirs. Today's game is the dog race.
Edd: Alright thanks.
Eddy: Yup.
The nurse enters back into the room wearing a rubber glove covered in lubricant
NLP: Alright you two clear out. It's time for me to help Eddy.
Edd & Stocking have a horrified look on their faces.
Edd: Uh... Yeah. Do your thang.
The both of them run away.
Eddy: Just be gentle please.
NLP: Oh don't worry Eddy... I never am.
Eddy: Wait what?
Edd walks to the changing room to get ready for the dog race.
Edd: "Oh I'm just fool! Survivor of a slaughter at my school! Dododododododo!"
Buttercup: Double D!
Edd turns to talk to Buttercup.
Edd: Not you again.
Buttercup: Where ya going?
Edd: Your mothers house! No, not really. I'm going to race today.
Buttercup: Great! You read page eleven in your book then?
Edd: My book?
Flash back time!
Edd tosses the book into a fire.
Edd: Ha! I won't conform to your society prison world! I'm a rebel!
Back to Edd & Buttercup.
Edd: Yeah? Yeah. Yeah! Of course. I know every page by heart now.
Buttercup: Thats good. Good luck in the race.
Edd: Yeah. Thanks. I'll just wing it.
Now in the locker room, Edd gets ready for the dog race. Eddy hobbles into the room as well.
Edd: Eddy! You look... Really pale. What exactly happened in there?
Eddy flashes back.
Outside the medical room door one can hear the screams of Eddy.
Eddy: Ahahahaha! You know what you're doing and you enjoy it! Ahahahaha!
Back to the locker room.
Eddy: Nothing. Nothing happened.
Now enters Kevin.
Kevin: I finally make an appearance in your guys' stupid stories!
Eddy: Are you s****ing me!? Get Da f*** out of here!
Kevin: Never! I will take control of this story line and rule this fanfic for the rest of eternity!
Eddy: Double D, your boyfriend is trying to take over our Fanfiction!
Edd: He's not my boy! We bearly even ever talked to each other in the original series!
Kevin: Besides, if I was into guys I could do better.
Edd: Yeah right. You'd wish you could get my perfect, womanly figure all to yourself!
Eddy: Sounds like what Blossom tells you every night Sockhead.
Stocking: Ive found a cookie!
Buttercup: Everyone to the track!
Everyone is at the starting line. Edd and Stocking talk.
Edd: So Stocking. Are you like the voice of every girl in an English dub anime now or what?
Stocking: Pretty much. Myself in my own anime, Mystletiann from Dream Eater Merry, San from Save Me Lollipop, Shiro in this anime. I do them all.
Edd: Your voice actress must be living large.
Stocking: Sure is and she just does the one voice. Go figure.
Edd: Well look at Bubbles voice actress. She's done everyone.
Stocking: No that's Panty.
Edd: Oh! Burn!
Buttercup: Race already!
Everyone runs. The two of them arrive at the pendulums and stop at the entrance.
Edd: We could go around it.
Stocking: I don't think that'll work. Look.
The duo see guys who've jumped off the track get gunned down by guys in bird costumes.
Edd: Hmm, I do t wanna die by pendulums or furies with machine guns.
The two are interrupted by a random guy.
Guy: I can stop the pendulums with my face.
Edd: What?
Guy: I can stop them with my face.
Edd: I advise you not to do that.
Guy: Watch and learn!
The guy runs into the pendulums getting cut into a billion little pieces but his blood at leasts gunks up the gears and stops them. Edd and Stocking just look at the carnage.
Stocking: You know I don't wanna be "this person" but his face did stop the pendulums.
Edd: ... Are you seriously defending that? Is that where we are now?
The two of them head on to the bungee jump.
Stocking: You sure this rope is long enough?
Edd: Of course I'm sure. Now go!
Edd pushes her off.
Stocking: You sonuvab****!
Edd hears a thud.
Edd: Eh, that sounds painful. I'm just going to take the elevator.
They reach the begging of the bouncing ball pit.
Edd: Must be some kinda poisonous gas down there.
Stocking stands next to him covered in bruises.
Stocking: Check for your self!
Stocking kicks him into the pit.
Edd: Ahahahah! It's like Eds bathroom! Oh this is horrible! I can see the stench in here!
Both of them now bounce across the pit.
Edd: Hey Stocking! How many times have you bounced on giant balls!?
Stocking: More then you'd imagine but not as many as you hoped.
Edd: You're stealing my lines!
Stocking: Shut up and win the race!
Edd: Im trying but... There's too many scientist!
Dexter then bounces by.
Edd: See!
Kevin and them make it the the final arena.
Announcer: The last person to hold this ball wins the tournament!
Edd: Fun!
The floor squares then begin to fall.
Edd: Oh! It's like a Mario Party but more violent!
Stocking: I think that Mario Party is the violent Mario Party.
Edd gets the ball.
Edd: I got the ball!
Stocking: You would only have one.
Edd: F*** you emo!
Kevin: Gimme that ball!
Kevin tackles Edd. They fight for the ball as the floor falls around them.
Kevin: After this chapter, my fan base will demand I take over as the main character in all of your stories.
Edd gets pissed.
Edd: Never.
Edd lifts Kevin over his head and throws him into the spikes below.
Edd: Hey Kevin! Does that hurt? Cause it looks like it hurts?
Edd turns back to Stocking.
Edd: That was such a Mortal Kombat move I did. I'm so Scorpion right now. Hey Stocking! Where's the ball?
Stocking: Kevin had it.
The two look down to see a deflated ball above an impaled Kevin.
Edd: Well... Guess we better watch the third episode because now I need to know if the boy is proven innocent.
Stocking: You just wanna bang the gimp girl.
Edd: So then you wanna?
Stocking: No.
Edd: I got candy.
Stocking: You really think that'll work?
Edd: Is it?
Stocking: ... Fine, lets go. But no eye contact.
Edd: Woo! Double D gets the Double D's!
Movie rating: Based on the two episodes I've watched I give it five hard candies out of five. See for yourself haters.
