CHAPTER 7
It was to T'lana's satisfaction that she acquired a positive identification for the stranger Zakan by showing around the pictures that Geriana had drawn of him and his daughter. N'ton among others had recognised him as Z'kan, Brown Adeth's rider. N'ton did not remember a daughter, but as he said, he'd have been unlikely to have met her. Oldtimers who had stayed at Fort described him as a bit of a loner, proud and loyal. He had argued frequently with T'ron and they had been surprised that he had not stayed. They suggested that only a sense of duty to the Weyrleader had taken him to Southern. It fitted with T'lana's surmise; and she doubted not that he was having trouble with the Southern Weyrleaders.
oOoOo
Zaira had gone to H'llon's workshop – she felt safe and relaxed there – only to find him cursing and swearing and clearing up a mess that looked as though a hurricane had hit the room. His lizards and apprentices were helping.
"What happened?" She asked. H'llon snorted.
"Melth got nosy and stuck his head in the door before I could say him nay." He complained. "There was a lot of sawdust about and the silly fool started sneezing. How much damage he'll be capable of doing when he's grown the first egg only knows."
Zaira managed not to laugh. The concept of Melth sneezing a disaster was amusing, as was H'llon's appearance. His clothes, hair and eyebrows were full of sawdust, and a spiral of plane shaving hung like an earring from one ear. She set to with a will, helping to clear up the mess while Melth rumbled contritely outside, snuffling uncomfortably from time to time. H'llon went out to scratch his eyebrows.
"You duzzy great idiot" he said lovingly. "Are you all right?"
"You did ask that before" replied Melth. "I am quite all right but my nose tickles. I think I'm going to…"
H'llon was blown off his feet by a gargantuan dragon sneeze and this time Zaira could not conceal her laughter. H'llon sat for a moment looking dazed; then he joined in with a deep if rueful guffaw.
"Are you cross with me?" asked Melth, plaintively.
"No, darling Melth, how could I be cross with you? Just please! Check in future that it's safe for you to come in!" Soothed H'llon.
oOoOo
Zaira was happy to spend much of her free time in H'llon's workshop. She got on pretty well with Radall, Telfer and Elissa, especially when she evinced an interest in logicating. She gave up the pretence of being a boy there: there seemed little point when no one seemed at all taken in. However, she managed her front to the Weyr in general, as the logicators seemed happy enough to keep their deductions to themselves. She did flee to T'lan, fighting back tears, when a Blue rider made a rather determined pass at her: and after giving her a cuddle and some klah, T'lana went and Spoke to the man. He duly apologised to 'Zairan' making excuse that his dragon had been disappointed in a mating flight and his blood was up. She forgave him; but made sure she spent more time in the company of people she trusted, which largely meant the logicators.
oOoOo
Spring progressed and H'llon and Melth were soon engrossed in practising flying. Zaira proposed a picnic in the mountains and H'llon concurred cheerfully with her idea. It was plain that she was used to dragons and made no difficulty of scrambling onto Melth's half-grown neck. She seemed quite happy listening to H'llon explaining all of Melth's virtues, how clever he was at chewing firestone and how excited they both were at the thought of flying Between for the first time. In return, she confided in him about her father's reasons for hiding her, his fears that T'kul would leave her alone no longer, and his ties of loyalty having sworn to follow T'ron anywhere before the shift forward in time. She explained that she was, technically, an Oldtimer herself since she had come forward as a foetus. Most young children had been fostered around and left in the Old Time as too young; young Weyrlings had been sent to Benden with no explanation since only dragons who could go between could come. There were thus few enough younger Oldtimers on Southern, and none who were Zaira's contemporaries. H'llon read between the lines of the lonely existence of a motherless child – the long time between they came forward having forced the birthing and killed the unfortunate woman – fostered unwillingly by a variety of Oldtimer women, jealous of having lost their own young ones and the ability to have others. She had little enough idea of how to be a child, but her sojourn at High Reaches was teaching her how to relate to other youngsters, delighting as she was in the companionship and comradeship of the logicators. H'llon's heart went out to the lonely waif and he became even more determined to look after her!
oOoOo
Daenilth duly and without any fuss laid thirty-four eggs, settling once and for all the question of Mirrith's ability to lay fertile eggs. Z'kan turned up thereafter to visit and see how his 'son' was settling; and T'lana reckoned that he must have his runners stabled snug in a nearby cave, probably with some holdless paid to take care of them. She met the man with a nod and a smile, and said,
"She's out helping H'llon and his apprentices collect wood. Don't you think it would be easier if you flew in on Adeth? The subterfuge must be arduous."
He spluttered.
"HOW? –Did she tell you?"
T'lana shook her head.
"No. I worked it out from your own clues. Then armed with a sketch of you I was able to find out Adeth's name from people who knew you. Some of them could even remember your name too!" She twinkled.
"I didn't think I'd left any clues." He was chagrined as well as concerned. T'lana grinned at him and explained her deductive reasoning. He listened, shaken and astonished.
"I did not realise it was possible to apply reason like that." He said. "What are you intending to do?"
"Put the child to egg, of course. And ask if you wanted to return north and join us at High Reaches."
"You wouldn't want to send her back?"
"To T'kul's tender mercies? You have to be kidding." She snorted. "That man's so convinced he's the greatest gift to women that ever lived it never occurs to him that some of them do mean 'no' when they say it."
He let out a sigh of relief.
"You have my gratitude – both for protecting her and for giving her the chance to Impress. As to myself, I swore an oath to follow T'ron anywhere before we came forward. I can't betray that oath."
T'lana nodded and laid a hand on his arm.
"I honour you for that." She said. "For he – you – all the Oldtimers – saved us. I only marvel at why some have seemingly turned their backs on honour."
He shrugged.
"I cannot explain it. Perhaps it is because the people of today treat Dragonmen with a more cavalier attitude than we were used to; perhaps it is the years of fighting Thread with no surcease. Perhaps it is merely jealousy of F'lar, whose name is praised everywhere as the ideal dragonman."
T'lana chuckled.
"Yet they praise and curse him by turn." She said. "People are fickle; and those who hold power also carry responsibility and are thus easy to blame."
He looked thoughtful.
"Well" he said abruptly, "I'm glad my daughter did not tell you everything. I did not think she would, but for a moment…"
"She's a loyal child" T'lana told him. "But she's virtually given up worrying about concealing her gender. She's too pretty to be a boy."
"She's had no trouble?"
"Nothing she or I couldn't handle. She'll be home soon and you can ask her yourself. Then you might as well ask Adeth in and stop hiding who you are. We'll be glad to have you as a guest."
"Are you crazy? We're forbidden to come north. T'bor…"
"T'bor won't make a fuss. And what we don't tell F'lar, he'll not fret over either. If no one makes an issue of where you are from, no one will ask. T'bor has the good common sense to know when asking questions is a bad idea."
He laughed ruefully.
"Do you run everyone here?"
"No – but Pilgra's one of my dearest friends; and she does. She's not one to follow rules for the sake of it."
oOoOo
Z'kan had a lot to digest; and he took himself off to do so while he awaited the return of his daughter. He raised an eyebrow seeing that it was the nosy young Bronze rider with so many woodcraft acquaintances who was leading this expedition: and raised them still further when the physical deformities of two of his apprentices became apparent. The third shock was that one of his apprentices was a girl. Zaira however seemed to be on excellent terms with all of them, and Z'kan's jealous fatherly eye saw nothing untoward in H'llon's treatment of her. Indeed the lad seemed most protective! Z'kan strolled over, and Zaira's face lit up with pleasure.
"Father! How good to see you. Come and meet my friends!"
She took him by the hand and proceeded to introduce him to H'llon, Radall, Telfer and Elissa with a brief potted history of each. Z'kan greeted them gravely.
"I take it you are the core of these – logicators – she called you all I think," he said. H'llon grinned.
"Yes, sir, I'm afraid we are."
Z'kan grunted.
"If you know everything about me, you don't go calling me 'sir', Bronze rider." He growled.
"I was brought up to respect experience before all else." H'llon told him, a little stiffly. "I personally find that being accorded respect for Impressing Melth when I've not even flown Thread is rather ridiculous. However, we could compromise and go by High Reaches custom of using first names?"
Z'kan had bristled slightly at the customs he was used to being called 'ridiculous' – no one could accuse H'llon of being versed in tact – but the young man's obvious discomfort at being shown undue respect by a man far more experienced than he made the older man warm to him, and he took the proffered hand.
"Z'kan" he said. H'llon grinned, and he added "But of course you know that."
"H'llon, Weyrwoodcrafter." H'llon supplied. "That I HAVE earned."
Z'kan grunted again.
"Well you know I'm craftbred myself. I respect your skills and achievements."
Zaira heaved an audible sigh.
"You two are being so STUFFY you know!" She complained. "Like two Queens meeting for the first time!"
H'llon and Z'kan exchanged a look and both laughed.
"Well, lad, shall we talk about something safe like your crafting?" Asked Z'kan with a lopsided grin.
"Come into my workshop and I'll break out the good stuff that Elissa's mother made." H'llon suggested. "That'll break down any reserve and we can get to know each other properly. I've been looking forward to it – when Zaira speaks of you, it's plain you're a man worth knowing."
H'llon was so plainly guileless that Z'kan was touched and he willingly went along with the woodcrafter.
oOoOo
L'rilly had done some of the running about with pictures of Z'kan; she pretended that logicating was a bit beneath her, but was actually fascinated. She had spent a lot of her life being rather obsessed with her own image – largely the fault of trying to live up to the expectations of her parents – and now that she had grown up and had become less self absorbed was noticing things about other people for the first time. She remarked as much to T'lana, who hugged her.
"People are such fun" T'lana told her. "Seeing the way they react to various stimuli – er, circumstances" she amended hastily as L'rilly gave her a Look. T'lana's interest in things mathematical was not universally shared and L'rilly knew nothing and cared less about population statistics! T'lana added, "And when it's really fun is if you've predicted right what someone is going to do, or has done. Using statistics I can assign probabilities to particular types of people…"
L'rilly thumped her and T'lana laughed.
"You and your statistics" L'rilly grinned. "You can be almost as irritating as D're."
"Ah?" Said T'lana mildly, and L'rilly scowled.
"The man is ubiquitous! Whenever I turn round he's there. I don't want to have anything to do with him!"
"Then why does he seem to come into your conversation so often?" Asked T'lana shrewdly. L'rilly burned and shook her head.
"I don't know!" she wailed. "He – he just GETS to me!"
Her friend patted her on the shoulder.
"Can't you try to get to know him without letting your prejudices about the Holdless stand in the way?" She asked mildly. L'rilly shook her head.
"I have tried! Only whenever I try to have a conversation with him, he says something stupid or suggestive and I ache to slap him!"
T'lana sighed.
"Have you considered that he wants so hard to please you that he just gets nervous and says something daft?" She asked.
"It's not that at all! He does it a-purpose to annoy me!" Declared L'rilly. "He says he likes to see me angry because it makes me more beautiful!"
"It certainly gives you a lot of animation." Concurred T'lana. "I think he's trying to find out what makes you YOU if you see what I mean."
"No I don't." Groused L'rilly.
"I am sure it will all work out eventually, you know." T'lana reassured her.
"T'lan, that's just like you. You're such an optimist!" L'rilly complained. T'lana shrugged.
"One of us has to be."
oOoOo
D're had not meant to eavesdrop; it just happens to be human nature to prick up the ears when one's own name is mentioned, he told himself. And of course the old adage of eavesdroppers never hearing any good of themselves certainly was true! Still, he comforted himself, she's certainly not indifferent to me. D're had just taken possession of the little wooden bronze dragon he had asked H'llon to carve for him; and although it seemed that L'rilly was out of charity with him, she was rarely in favour of his presence so now seemed as good a time as any to give it to her. He went to her weyr and called in,
"L'rilly – a quick word if you please?"
She appeared at the entrance and looked down at him.
"What do you want?" she asked ungraciously.
"Before I Impressed Esruth" his face softened as he spoke and L'rilly surprised herself thinking how handsome he was "I asked H'llon to make something – because I didn't think I'd ever have a real Bronze dragon to offer you. I'd like you to have it anyway." He thrust a packet at her. Startled, L'rilly took it and as he gazed up unwrapped it.
"OH!" she exclaimed "He – he's charming!" She turned to glare at him suspiciously. "Why?"
D're shrugged.
"Bothered if I know." He said. "After all, you've not given me any encouragement. I guess a sane man'd have left off long ago. But you've often called me a fool. And sometimes you laugh at my foolishness."
L'rilly made a non-committal noise.
"You are a fool." She stated. "You spend all your time needling me. How's that to make me think you might like me?"
"I just love the way your eyes spark. And when you blush it's so pretty. Folks say Weyrwomen can't blush but you can.."
L'rilly blushed and scowled.
"Only when you make me you-you Runner-dung!" she said. "What's your game anyway? You ought to have realised by now that just because someone is a Weyrwoman doesn't mean she'll roll in the hay with just anyone!"
"I should hope not!" He sounded indignant. "I was rather hoping that you'd confine yourself to rolling in the hay – and other things – with me!"
L'rilly stamped her foot, and almost threw the exquisite wooden dragon at him. However she managed to gather the tattered remnants of her dignity around her and stalked wordlessly into her weyr.
"Blew that, D're you fool" the man muttered to himself. "Why by the Red Star does she bring out the worst in me?" He decided to try again.
"L'rilly!" He called. There was a muffled,
"Go AWAY!"
D're cogitated.
"D'you know" he called "I can't win here. You'll be angry if I stay – and peeved if I take you at your word and go. I'm coming in."
There was a shriek of anger as he strode into her weyr, making light of the steps with his wooden leg. He jerked L'rilly into his arms, heedless of her protests or the angry scolding of Bubbles and Zammo, telling Tamalenth
"Let me try this Tammy old girl before you lose your rag too."
Tamalenth was not happy; but her rider's feelings about D're were so confused the young Queen hung back. D're looked down into L'rilly's face, reflecting mixed feelings of fury and arousal.
"I always lose when we're talking" he said grimly "So let's try it with your mouth otherwise occupied." And he kissed her thoroughly. L'rilly struggled in a rather half-hearted way but at last he felt her respond and give up the fight. He lifted his head and looked down at her, his hands tightening on her arms. She looked up at him and a tear trickled down her face. He wiped it away with one finger.
"I guess it's too soon after Sh'allen" he said, surprising her with the gentleness in his tone. "It's all right – I'm going now. But Queenrider! I'm staking my claim – and Esruth's."
Abruptly he let go of her, and L'rilly half sat, half fell onto her sleeping couch, dazed at the intensity of feeling in his eyes and voice. As he left she spoke his name; and he turned.
"I'll wait until you want me, L'rilly" he said, his voice raw "But I know you'd regret it if I stayed now. And I don't trust myself, my pretty." He turned and left hurriedly, and L'rilly buried her head in her hands wondering how she felt. Tamalenth's head intruded into the inner cavern making soothing noises and L'rilly shook herself and devoted herself to rubbing the young Queen's eyebrow ridges.
oOoOo
T'lan, who always knew everything that was happening in the Weyr through her ability to hear all dragons came to find her friend. L'rilly hugged her and sobbed, as much from anger and confusion as any other reason. T'lana bore it stoically; L'rilly had always been inclined to an excess of emotion. It was just as well that Tamalenth was by nature rather placid – a stabilising influence on the pair.
"I WANTED him, T'lan" wailed L'rilly.
"Well what's wrong with that? Have him!" said T'lana, puzzled. L'rilly shook her head.
"It's not that simple!" She snuffled. "I mean I REALLY want him. He pulls me apart and I'm so afraid it's going to hurt dreadfully afterwards!"
T'lana held her friend, stroking her hair. At last they were near the whole truth. L'rilly amended,
"And he's not like all the people I know. He's not SAFE and he –he's wild and – and so unconventional!"
T'lana counted to twenty slowly before she spoke, in a controlled and soothing tone.
"L'rilly, dear one, you've not felt this way about people who are safe and conventional. Don't you think that's what attracts you to him? The fact that he's ready to love you regardless of who and what you might be and damn any obstacles others might set up?"
L'rilly sobbed,
"And when he's won and had me, he'll walk away! And what sort of father would he be anyway?"
"And what sort of mother would you be?" asked T'lana bluntly. If L'rilly was thinking babies she really was serious about D're! L'rilly hung her head.
"Not like you or Pilgra" she mumbled. "I'd foster out – but – but I'd like to have a baby before it's too late!"
"Well now, you just listen to me, L'rilly!" T'lana gave the girl a little shake. "If you were thinking of getting D're to father a child, he'd need to know about it – and if you ask me, he'd be a fardling good father! Look at the care he took of all his waifs and strays! As to leaving you – well, the way he looks at you isn't a man in lust, stalking difficult prey. It's the way R'gar looks at me – and don't you go wasting it, girl, we only get something like that once in a lifetime if we're lucky! And he's a Bronze rider – so he can even be with you for that, excepting the next time!"
L'rilly nodded at T'lana's words though she continued to snuffle miserably. However by now the gist seemed to be that someone else would fly her and Tamalenth next time because Esruth wouldn't be big enough. T'lana tried not to sigh audibly and spoke to her volatile friend in a calm reasonable tone.
"L'rilly – D're's a big boy. Yes, in more ways than one, you're thinking of him saying that, so let the smirk out. It's better for you than howling. He understands the ways things have to be in Weyrs, he'll not hold it against you that someone has to fly Tamalenth. It's the way it's always been. And it's not as though you're inexperienced, or that you don't know all the Bronze riders. Shards, it'll probably be Ragath – you LIKE L'gani, and you and he have been together before. And if you explain to him before she next rises, he'll be sensitive afterwards." T'lana felt she was talking herself hoarse; but her calm tones were getting through to L'rilly who nodded, a little damply.
"You're always so irritatingly Right, T'lan" she sighed. "I'm sorry – I'll try to keep control of myself. It just isn't FAIR!"
T'lana hid her smile. She doubted that L'rilly could categorise just WHAT was not fair! However, it did look as though the situation was going to resolve itself; and all she, T'lana could do was to let matters take their course and leave well alone now!
oOoOo
L'rilly herself sought out D're the next day. He was hitched up on one buttock on H'llon's workbench, talking to the woodcrafter and Z'kan. He was telling a lewdly improbable tale about a Holder lady and three harpers; and H'llon was burning, glad he'd sent the youngsters away. Z'kan guffawed at the punch line, and L'rilly almost lost her resolve; but D're looked up and caught her eye: and she saw him pale under his tan. He got up quickly and limped out to her, gazing down at her intently. She flushed and dropped her eyes, and tried to speak casually.
"You know of course that Tamalenth will probably rise again before Esruth is adult?"
She felt him stiffen beside her, but he spoke calmly enough.
"Aye, for sure I'd figured that. I may be a fool but I'm not an idiot."
"I expect Ragath will fly her. She likes him and I like L'gani."
"He'll treat you well. I like L'gani too, fardles take him."
She looked up at the intense emotion in that last curse. It was a mistake: his eyes held hers and she felt her heart quicken and her breath come raggedly. He took her hand; and she did not pull it away.
"Pretty, I can't stand by while another man is with my woman." He said. "I'll keep my distance until after Tamalenth rises again. I thought I could handle it – but when you look at me like that, I find I can't." His grip on her hand tightened. "I never felt like this before" he tried to laugh but it was a rather shaky sound. "Me, the love 'em and leave 'em type, to be sure, and I've been caught by a fire-breathing lady I should well avoid!"
"I'm GLAD!" She said fiercely. "D're. You make sure you're around after Tamalenth rises, or scorch it, I'll scorch you!"
He didn't kiss he there in the bowl as she was half-afraid and half-hopeful that he might do; but the look he exchanged with her might just as well have been a kiss. Then he turned on his heel and strode limping away.
