A/N: Well, i dont know what happened, but i guess if you look at my writing as a person, that last chapter was very "thereputic." i was able to move on with the story because i was hit with some serious inspiration tonight and well im getting overly exited and posting it without rereading it. Ill, be short but on a small emo note, for the first time in my life, i almost had tears coming out of both eyes on the last lines of this chapter, i dont know if its because of whats going on personally right now or if the chapter is good? but iguess we will find out. Thank you all who had subscribed to this story guys that means just as much to me as a reveiw and i appreciate it greatly, and to those who reveiw thanx alot as well. Again im not in the right mind set to be able to right responses.


Sighing Mai turned to look out the window again. Bright sunlight poured through the open windows of the small classroom as the teacher went off on some lecture about how important knowledge of the past was in order to approach the future with a clear mind. Mai had given up on taking notes in this class because the teacher never stayed on topic and the briefs moments he did came out to useless gibberish.

It's been a week now; I hope she's alright, that phone call… Remembering the phone call she received from Natsuki a few days ago Mai's brows furrowed. Why after all the work she has put in the past month would she decide to start ditching again? Well, I guess she's at least planning on doing some work if she asked me to take notes but why wouldn't she want to see me, and why was she so angry? She hasn't been like that for a long time.

Watching some birds fly around playfully chasing each other she drifted off into thoughts of her blue haired friend not hearing the distant roar of a motorcycle. I hope she's alright…I wonder when she will be back.

The wind began to pick up outside and she turned her attention to the trees now swaying in the wind, their branches swaying side to side lazily. Leaves and other foliage blew through the air, picked up by small wind currents to be carried off to some other part of the school grounds. It really is a pretty day.

Watching leaves being blown across the main walkway leading to the front of the school she noticed a lone figure walking in the distance heading towards the school. Unconsciously squinting to get a better picture of the approaching figure she noticed that whoever it was, was limping slightly. Not really thinking at this point, Mai didn't even try to guess who the figure was.

Turning her attention back to the teacher to see if he had finished his rant, she was greeted with the sound of the bell. There was a sudden shuffling as students began to stand, grab their books and slowly exit the class. Mai merely began to stretch extending her arms out to either side, casually glancing out the window when she saw something that made her stop.

The figure that she had earlier ignored was much closer now and their features fully discernable. Blue hair caught up in the wind whipped to one side of the girl's face as she limped her way up the steps to the school. Natsuki, in her school uniform wore her usual scowl as she fought the wind to gain some control over her hair.

"She's back!" Mai cried, receiving a raised eyebrow from the teacher who was now sitting at his desk. Quickly grabbing her things Mai leapt from her seat and ran to the entrance of the school.

Fighting her way through the crowd, uncharacteristically pushing her way through she finally reached the entrance. Looking around for any sign of her friend she took a few steps outside. After a few minutes of trying to spot Natsuki in the mass of students she gave up. Sighing she turned around, only to almost bump into Reito who was standing behind her.

"Ah!" she exclaimed as she took a hurried step back, almost falling down, but was saved as two strong hands gripped her shoulders.

"Are you alright Tokiha-san?" Reito questioned her, releasing her shoulders when he was sure she had proper footing.

Blushing slightly Mai stuttered, "I...I'm fine thank you Kanzaki-san."

Watching Mai patting down her uniform in an attempt to straighten it, Reito smiled, "How many times do I have to say to call me Reito, Tokiha-san?" Waving off Mai's embarrassed protests he continued, "If I may ask, what are you doing out here right now? I did not think you had any classes in this part of the school today."

Blushing again Mai was staring at her feet avoiding Reito's eyes. "I was looking for Natsuki. I thought I saw her and she hasn't been to school for a week now and when I talked to her last she seemed….distressed."

Looking up and into the crowd Reito seemed to be searching for the blue hair girl himself. "I wasn't aware that she hasn't been coming to school. That's quite odd considering how hard she has been working the past month. Shizuru has been telling me…" he trailed off, staring ahead, seemingly lost in thought.

"Reito-san?" Mai questioned him worry in her voice.

He seemed to come back down to earth and looked back down at her, causing her to blush slightly as their eyes met again. "I think you should find her Mai-san. I have a feeling she is really going to need your help right now, and now if you will please excuse me." with that he turned and began to walk away.

Snapping out of the slight haze she was in Mai called out, "Wait! What do you mean? Do you know something Reito-san?" he merely raised his arm and waved as he disappeared into the crowd.

By now her shouting had attracted some attention from students walking near by. Blushing again Mai hurried off and began to search again for Natsuki.


Limping through the hallways of Fuka Academy Natsuki was given a wide berth. Students were going out of their way to avoid the obviously angry girl. Her scowl was a sharp contrast the state she was in the last time any of the students saw her. She radiated a threatening aura, daring anyone to approach or touch her.

Takeda upon seeing her in this state assumed he had done something to anger the girl and all color drained from his face. He began to run in the opposite direction knocking everyone in his path out of the way in order to put as much distance between himself and the fuming girl.

Instead of following in pursuit Natsuki merely turned into a classroom and took up her usual seat by the window. She removed her scowl and took on the appearance of being bored, the stares she received walking down the halls were only feeding her agitation and anger. There was now a small crowd outside the room looking in on the girl who had been absent from school for a week and was now twenty minutes early to her class. Why can't everyone just mind their own damn business? I do it, why is it so fucking hard for them?


It had taken a long time but she had finally managed to stop crying that morning. The tears that seemed to overwhelm her every so often seemed to turn into a blind rage, in which her vision would go white. She would later find her self standing in the middle of her apartment with new bruises and cuts on her hands and forearms, her knuckles taking most of the damage.

As soon as she had stopped crying the confused anger began to build within her again. Fighting for control of her emotions and feeding the growing anger with the frustration of not being able to control her emotions she ran back into her apartment.

She didn't lose it this time though. Her vision began to blur but she remained in control, her fists clenched, arms flexed, legs rooted to the ground and teeth grinding. After every time she lost control she would break down crying again all the emotions rushing forth. This usually lasted until she fell asleep or was to tired to move.

This time however, her vision returned to her and she began to take shallow breaths, not seeming to be able to get enough oxygen. The tears didn't come. She wouldn't let them. Clamping her eyes shut, and flexing each and every muscle in her body until they cramped, she fought them, and for the first time won out. When she did though she felt herself sink deeper into the emptiness in her chest.

Slowly opening her eyes, Natsuki began to relax her muscles and catch her breath again. This time she had won, she just hoped it didn't happen at school.

Quickly washing her face, she exited her apartment for the second time, locked the door and walked down the steps. Approaching her bike she stared at the helmet that had started this morning's "episode" lying on the cold asphalt of the parking lot.

Before she had time to sink deeper into thought she reached down grabbed the helmet and put it on. Refusing to breath through her nose she jumped on her bike and sped off towards school faster than she ever had before.

Natsuki was snapped out of her thoughts as the school bell rang. Assuming class was beginning she sighed and leaned back in her chair casually glancing around the class room.

She was shocked when she realized students were standing from their seats and exiting the classroom. What? There's no way! She looked at the clock for her answer. Amazingly it showed that class was indeed over.

She sat there dumbfounded for a few seconds before snapping out of it suddenly. Wow, I am really out of it. I cant keep this up…

Gathering her things she quietly exited the classroom. Once again begin met with glances that always avoided her eyes she sighed. This is going to be a very long day.


Running around campus, Mai was frantically looking for Natsuki again. Ever since her encounter with Reito she had looked for her friend between all her classes and at lunch to no avail. It was now the end of the day and she was hoping to catch her before she left so she could find out what was wrong.

The wind whipped up again giving her a chill as it sent her hair flying. She stopped running and held her coat close to her and bowed her head hoping to fight off the chill. When the wind died down she looked up again she caught sight of the one she had been searching all day for.

Natsuki was walking ahead of her, still limping, her books thrown over her shoulder. "Natsuki!" calling out Mai began to run toward her friend.

Natsuki stopped walking, turned slightly, saw Mai approaching, then turned around and continued on her original path. Startled by this action Mai ran up to Natsuki and questioned her, "Where have you been?!"

Natsuki kept on walking, not turning to look at Mai when she answered in a low voice, "No where."

"Then why are you limping?! How did you hurt your leg?" Mai continued trying to match Natsuki's quick pace but falling behind.

Natsuki's brow furrowed slightly, intensifying her scowl. "I'm fine."

Mai let out an exasperated sigh. "It doesn't look that way." Looking down at Natsuki's hands she noticed bandages covered the both, with red spots where her knuckles were. "What happened to your hands?!"

Natsuki quickened her pace slightly. "Nothing, I said I'm fine."

"You're not fine! Look at your hands!"

"I said I'm fine damn it! Leave me alone!" Natsuki snapped.

Mai fell behind a few steps at this. What's wrong with her? She hasn't acted like this since… since… since I first met her. I have to help her.

Running up she gently grabbed Natsuki's hand, hoping she didn't hurt the girl. Natsuki stopped, still not looking back at her. "Natsuki, tell me what's wrong, I can help you, I'm your friend. I don't know what happened but I can help."

Then thinking back on her conversation with Reito a thought struck her. "Does it have something to do with Shizuru?"

The hand that she was gripping clenched. The arm that she held on to tightened. Natsuki's entire frame stiffened, and when she spoke, her voice was low and her tone dangerous. "Mai… Let go of me… Now."

Her voice had been very low when she spoke, and the wind had made it hard to hear but Mai her every word. The final word a command that spoke of a promise of something dangerous if it was not obeyed.

Mai let go of Natsuki's arm quickly. She couldn't believe what was happening. Her good friend who had just started opening up to everyone, who had just started to enjoy life, was now closing her off. Something has happened. She couldn't understand what though, what could have happened to have changed Natsuki so much in a week? It didn't make any sense. She had been so happy when Mai had last saw her and then she had just disappeared and returned like…like this.

Natsuki had started walking again as soon as Mai had released her arm. After a few steps though she stopped, a gust of wind cutting across the path again sending her hair flying about her shoulders. The girl before Mai now was like a brick wall, impenetrable and unmovable.

"Mai…"

Mai quickly looked up at her friend, hoping for some means to help her.

"Stay away from me. I don't want to see you again."

And with that she continued walking again, leaving behind a slowly tearing up Mai.


I'm sorry Mai, but I'm not going to let anyone get close again. Shizuru was the last… It's not going to happen again.
With that she put on the helmet again and sped off towards her apartment, hoping for a tearless sleep, but the tears were already starting to come.
Miles away, sunlight fought to get through blinds into a dark room. Shizuru rolled over in bed, fitfully twitching in her sleep. "Natsu...ki." The name escaping her lips as she rolled over again in her sleep.

On the table next to the bed rested a helmet, once belonging to the blue haired girl. Shizuru had retrieved it shortly after she had stopped crying that night, only to begin again when she had found it. She had rushed outside into the rain hoping to stop Natsuki already knowing that the girl had driven away but she didn't care.

Nothing was left of the girl but the helmet, lying in a puddle of water and the burning feeling in Shizuru's chest. She had nearly lost it like she did during the festival, but this time she had debatably held on to her sanity.

Confining herself to her bedroom, she never left the bed. Not to answer the phone, not to go to school, and not to eat. Drifting in and out of consciousness, her dreams filled with painful images of the one she loved refusing her again. Images of the pain on Natsuki's face when Shizuru had told her she couldn't love her anymore. Her conscious hours were few and filled with nothing but tears and the pain in her chest that threatened to consume her. She could no longer cope with the pain.

She had once again brought suffering upon Natsuki. Even when she tried to help her she hurt the poor girl. But she still questioned herself on whether or not she meant to help her in the first place. Her dreams were filled with arguments with herself over her reasons for sending the girl away.

Did she desire to hurt Natsuki? She didn't know anymore, she couldn't bring herself to face reality anymore, her dreams were bad enough. The doubts that plagued her mind tormented her in her sleep and her waking hours alike. The very idea of wanting to hurt Natsuki tearing her apart.

Tears began to pour down a sleeping Shizuru's face. Hugging a pillow fiercely she curled up, shaking violently. "Natsuki…. I love you."


A/N: Now ill kinda explain my stupid emo moment while writing this, it just kinda happened as i typed out the last paragraph without thinking, (it is kind of a precedent, im not a cryer and almost tears are pretty big...) Again warning you guys, i will probably be pretty emo for the next month or two, i will try to keep it out of my A/Ns and reveiw responses, but since none of you posted updates to your own stories this writing was a very good distraction for me. Well anyways hope you enjoyed it, let me know what you think

P.S. Oh, i'm not really looking for a beta persay, but if anyone would be willing to help me add a little bit of humer here and there in this story thatd be great. The past few sections have been meant to be serious but there will be a time in the future especially with shivers the Mai scenes (i perosnally dont like her that much or most of the characters involved with her I.E mikoto "sorry guys" tate, reito, etc) This is not gonna be a story where mai fixes Shizuru's and Natsuki's relationship just to let you guys know too, but about the beta let me know, humor has never been my strong point and atm its so far from my mind its sad

ssjx7squall