Clarke woke up on the cave floor where Bellamy had left her the night before. She didn't have the energy to walk back to the fire pit last night, so she just stayed curled up in a ball until she cried herself to sleep. Gingerly, she stood up and stretched, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. It was early in the morning and Clarke could just make out the sun starting to rise.
It was beautiful, but it did nothing to fill the gaping hole within her. She had screwed up.
She had something incredible with Bellamy, but she had thrown it all away. Well she wasn't giving up. Clarke wasn't going to stop until he forgave her.
Still tired, Clarke made her way out of the cave entrance and started heading back to the clearing. Bellamy must of cooled down by now, he couldn't of meant what he said. Yes, he deserved to be mad at her for a million reasons, but Clarke was going to make up for it. She wasn't going to lose him.
As she reached her friends she saw they were all packing up their things and getting ready to move again. Bellamy was putting out the fire, his back to her.
Maya came over to Clarke and handed her some type of protein bar. "Where were you last night?" she asked, her eyebrows knitted together, "Bellamy stormed back here looking all angry and when we asked about you all he said was that you were fine." Clarke blinked, she definitely was not fine.
"Are you really okay?" Maya asked concerned. Clarke just shrugged, "Yeah. Yeah I'm okay thanks." There was no sense to dragging Maya down with her, they had enough on their minds already.
Maya didn't look convinced but she nodded.
Bellamy's voice suddenly echoed through the woods, "We're moving out!" Clarke and Maya headed towards the group, and Clarke went to walk next to Bellamy.
He obviously knew she was there, but he looked straight ahead, a hard expression on his face.
"Bellamy," Clarke said softly, trying to get him to look at her, "I'm sorry." The expression on Bellamy's face didn't change, but he started walking a little faster and she saw his jaw clench. Good. At least she knew he was listening to her.
"I didn't warn Octavia about the missile because I didn't know she was there. I mean yes I knew, but I wasn't even thinking about it. Too many things were happening, I just forgot all about her. I was so focused on saving you and our friends that it clouded my judgement. I'm so so sorry."
At first Bellamy didn't respond and Clarke was afraid he was never going to talk to her again, and then he let out a simple, "Thanks."
Clarke looked at him questioningly, did that mean she was forgiven? He still refused to even look at her and he didn't seem all too sincere.
"So...do you forgive me?" she asked hesitantly, afraid to hear his answer.
Finally he turned to her and slowed his pace. "Yes Clarke, I forgive you." Clarke let out a breath she didn't she had been holding and smiled. She reached for his hand but he pulled away. A look of hurt flashed across Clarke's face and she glanced up at Bellamy.
"Just because I forgive you, doesn't mean I want to be with you."
Clarke felt like a bucket of cold water had just been dumped on her head. His words were stone cold and emotionless, and it made Clarke's legs feel weak. "But why?" she whispered, her voice wavering.
"Because I don't have feelings for you anymore Clarke," Bellamy replied.
Clarke looked at him in shock, "You don't mean that," she said sternly, refusing to believe him. He couldn't get over her in one night, could he?
"Yes I do," Bellamy spat. Without looking back, he moved up to walk by Wick and Raven. Clarke's head was spinning. What if he was telling the truth? What if what she did really changed the way he saw her. What if there was no going back?
After walking for a few more hours, they reached a lake. Everyone stopped to fill up their canteens and after her's was full, Clarke knelt down to search for seaweed.
The rest of her friends were already making their way back to the forest, but Clarke continued to look, running her hands through the water. Who knew what kind of condition they'd find her mom in?
"Clarke let's go!" Bellamy snapped from behind her. "We're wasting daylight. We don't have time for your games."
Clarke spun around, anger coursing through her body. He didn't get to talk like that to her just because he was upset. "My games?! In case you forgot this is my mom we're looking for. I think I can decide what we have time for!"
Bellamy glared at her and crossed his arms over his chest, "In case you forgot, you're not the only one here! We're all at risk, and finding your mom in time could mean the difference between life and death for some of us."
Clarke's shoulders sagged, knowing he was right.
Everyone was looking at the pair in silence, listening in on their outbursts. It was kinda hard not to.
Bellamy shook his head at her, and headed back towards the trees. Everyone followed him hesitantly, obviously feeling uncomfortable about being in the middle of Bellamy and Clarke's fight.
Raven fell back a little and waited until Clarke was by her side.
"So what's up with you and Bellamy?" she asked suspiciously. "He hates me," she said under her breath. Clarke didn't even have the energy to walk anymore, she just wanted to break down again. But she had been doing too much of that lately. It was time to be strong. Her mom needed her.
Raven rolled her eyes, "If you think that Bellamy hates you, you're an idiot." Clarke shot her a glare and Raven shrugged, "He's just really protective of his sister. Just give him time."
Clarke looked at her startled, she hadn't told Raven anything about the fight.
"How did you-" "We were five feet in front of you," Raven interrupted, "not five miles." Clarke couldn't help but smile. "So you don't hate me for what I did?"
Raven just shook her head, "It's war Clarke. There is no right and wrong." Clarke sighed softly, "I wish Bellamy could see it that way. But it doesn't matter. He doesn't care about me anymore."
"Clarke listen to me," Raven said sternly, "If Octavia hadn't been in that village he wouldn't of been mad at you at all. He's just biased when it comes to her."
Clarke stared at the back of Bellamy's head. Her entire body hurt. As much as Raven's statement made sense, it was up to Bellamy in the end. Her heart was already aching for him, and just the thought of his feelings being gone forever was terrifying.
She saw a flash of black in the corner of her right eye. She blinked to make sure she was right, when suddenly the thing jumped out towards him.
Clarke was in motion and screaming his name before she could even register what was happening.
"BELLAMY!"
Bellamy felt someone ram into him and he stumbled to the side. He turned around quickly, his hands tightening around his rifle, to see Clarke laying unconscious on the ground with some kind of large black animal on top of her.
"NO!" Bellamy roared pointing his gun at the creature and shooting. It collapsed on top of Clarke and Bellamy ran to her, rolling the dead animal off of her with Wick and Jasper's help.
Bellamy collected Clarke in his arms, her small form laying lifeless against his chest. She didn't appear to have any injuries besides a few scratches, but then Bellamy noticed a dark red stain in her golden hair.
"No," he whispered his hands immediately going to her neck. He wasn't even sure what he was looking for, but he felt a strong thrumming against his fingers so he could only see that as a good thing.
"Someone get my bag and hand me a towel or a rag or something," Bellamy ordered. Monty came up behind him and handed him a cloth. Bellamy took it and gently tilted up Clarke's head, pressing it against her injury.
Everyone was huddled around them, but Bellamy paid no attention to anyone else.
"Clarke," he said softly. She didn't even stir.
Bellamy trailed a finger across her cheek, "Please wake up for me princess." There was still no response.
"Clarke," he said again. Her body was still, but her breaths were even. She must of hit her head when that thing tackled her. When she had pushed him out of the way and could have gotten herself killed.
She sacrificed herself for him even though he had spent the entire day being a complete ass to her. Clarke Griffin was a far better person than him and he didn't deserve her, he knew that much.
But she would be fine, she was just unconscious. Clarke was a fighter. Bellamy was still worried. That was the second time she'd hit her head in one week. How much more could she take before it was too much on her?
There was nothing he could do for her right now. All he wanted was to take back everything he'd said, but what would be the point? She couldn't hear him. He wanted to tell her how much she meant to him, how much he needed her, and how he was just being an overprotective big brother to Octavia.
Bellamy wanted Clarke to know all these things, but right now the best way to make it up to her would be to get her to her mom. Her mom could fix Clarke.
Bellamy stood up with Clarke in his arms, staring off into the distance.
"Let's keep going," he said. Bellamy started to walk off, but loud protests from his friends stopped him.
"Bellamy what are you talking about?" Raven said immediately. "Clarke's hurt we can't just keep going."
"Yeah," Jasper agreed, "We need to get her help."
"And where do you suggest we get it?" Bellamy asked sharply, growing even more protective of the unconscious girl he was holding. "You suggest we make the walk back to camp? Even though everyone left? You think we should go back to Mount Weather and let the grounder guards take care of her?"
Everyone exchanged looks, obviously realizing out that Bellamy was right.
"So we're in agreement," he said coolly. Before anyone could reply, Bellamy started walking in what he only hoped was the right direction.
They had been walking for about forty minutes, and they were by far the hardest moments of Bellamy's life. Wick had offered to carry Clarke for a while, but Bellamy refused to give her up, just cradling her even closer to him.
When he said he didn't have feelings for her, he was surprised she didn't call his bluff. The words didn't even sound right coming out of his mouth. Just the thought of something happening to Octavia scared him beyond belief, but secretly Bellamy had never really been mad at Clarke. He knew why she had to do it, and he couldn't blame her.
She still hadn't woken up, and Bellamy was scared to death. At first he thought she would be fine, but what if he was wrong? The only thing that this entire thing had proved was that he was right. He definitely shouldn't be with Clarke. She deserved far better.
Even spacewalker would have been a better option for her than him.
Suddenly Bellamy felt a slight shifting in his arms and he heard Clarke make a noise.
Relief flooded through him, and he immediately dropped to the ground, gripping her tightly.
"Bellamy," Clarke moaned, her eyes still closed, one of her hands weakly searching for him. "Clarke. Clarke I'm right here," he said soothingly, taking her small hand in his larger one and intertwining their fingers. She smiled in content, until an expression of pain appeared on her face.
"Hurts," she mumbled, burying her face against his chest. Nausea shot through Bellamy thinking about all the pain she was in him. Pain that was his fault.
"Shhh I know," he said softly. "Open your eyes for me princess." Her eyes remained shut. "Please don't be mad at me," she said under her breath. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry..." Clarke's voice started to fade out again like she was about to fall back asleep.
"No, no you need to stay awake. Clarke look at me," he said frantically.
He hadn't even noticed, but everyone had stopped walking and was standing by him, looking at Clarke in worry.
With the hand that wasn't holding hers, Bellamy softly ran his fingers over her eyelids, "Open your eyes Clarke," he said as sternly as he could muster. Finally, her eyelids started to flutter and she blinked up at him, registering what was going on.
"Bellamy?" Clarke asked confused.
Raven let out a sound of relief, and everyone else followed suit.
"Clarke," he breathed his head automatically dropping to rest his forehead lightly on hers. "Don't you ever do that again," he growled. "Do not ever think for one second that my life is more important than yours do you understand me?"
Bellamy felt Clarke squeeze his hand and she sighed against him.
"I thought you hated me," she said quietly.
Bellamy felt his heart clench. He had made her think he hated her. How could he ever hate her? He felt completely the opposite.
"Clarke I'm so sorry. I was so wrong to yell at you like I did." He brushed a strand of hair out of her face. "I was just upset about Octavia, it wasn't about you. I know I don't deserve you, but please forgive me." He looked at her with a pleading in his eyes and Clarke gently brought her lips to his in response.
Bellamy smiled against her mouth. He was forgiven.
As Clarke pulled away she looked around questioningly, "Why are we by the drop ship?"
Bellamy looked around in surprise and realized she was right. This was the way to the drop ship. Had they really just gone in a circle? Had Cane found the drop ship and had been there the entire time? He had been so wrapped up in Clarke the last hour that he didn't even look where they were going. How could he not of thought of this before? How could they have been so stupid?
How did no one notice?
"Oh my god," Monty said out loud. "You're right."
Suddenly a loud scream ripped through what had just eased into dead silence. "Mom," Clarke said quietly.
Then she was ripping herself from Bellamy's arms and staggering towards the direction of the drop ship, wincing from the pain in her head.
"Mom!" Clarke screamed again taking off at a run now, stumbling with every other step.
"Clarke!" Bellamy yelled worried about what or who she was about to run into. Without a moment's hesitation, he took off after her with his friends right on his heels.
A.N. So I got this chapter up earlier than usual because I'm getting extremely invested in this story lol. As usual, let me know your thoughts!
