Disclaimer: Neon Genesis Evangelion is the creation of Anno and Gainax. I don't own it, make no claims to it, and am making no profit from this fan fiction. No infringement of copyright is intended. In other words, please don't sue.

Disclaimer: I do not own DC Comics or anything associated with it, and I am making no profit from this fan fiction. No infringement of copyright is intended. In other words, please don't sue.


Chapter Six: The Machinations of Takai Banryu

The son of Hades hummed cheerfully to himself as he walked down the street of Tokyo-3, allowing himself some time to enjoy the day. The weather was beautiful, he had a good start on his plans, and he was feeling far more positive about his relocation to Japan than he had when his father had first informed him that he would be moving.

Then he sneezed.

"Ugh," the young man grumbled as he removed a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his nose, his cheerful mood somewhat soured.

The antihistamines he'd taken were apparently wearing off. To make matters worse, it was too soon for him to take another dose unless he wanted to be unconscious or at least severely doped up for the next few hours. In a few minutes, he'd have to head indoors or endure a full-blown allergy attack.

Damn you, Persephone, he thought, knowing that his father's wife was the reason he suffered so. It's not like Father's indiscretions with mortal women are my fault just because I happen to be the product of one of them.

Well, it could be worse, he supposed. Compared to what Hera was known to do to the illegitimate children of Zeus, Persephone's wrath really wasn't so terrible.

He was about to retreat from the streets when a nearby newsstand caught his attention. Walking over to it, Takai plucked a copy of the Tokyo Tattler, the city's local rag magazine, from the shelves.

On the cover was a rather grainy image of himself fighting Wonder Girl. The corners of his lips quirked upwards upon seeing the picture.

Took so long to come out that I was starting to think no one saw us, he mused. Guess whoever took this picture finally saw the yen signs and decided to sell it.

Opening the tabloid, the demigod quickly started to skim the article that went with the picture on the cover. He was unsurprised to note that it consisted almost entirely of baseless speculation and hearsay, but one thing did intrigue him. They had named him.

According to the Tokyo Tattler, the figure in black armor that Wonder Girl had fought was called the "Dark Centurion."

Takai's little smirk grew into a full blown grin. It wasn't exactly accurate; centurions were officers in the legions of ancient Rome, and the demigod had no connections to that long gone empire. If a god could be said to have ethnicity, his father was Greek, not Italian.

Still, he had to admit that "Dark Centurion" definitely had a certain ring to it.

"Hey," the man who ran the newsstand said gruffly, "you going to pay for that, kid?"

Intending to just put the tabloid back, Takai was about to tell the man no and then leave.

However, that plan was quickly shot when he abruptly started sneezing again, this time all over the copy of the Tattler he held.

And his treacherous sinuses weren't done yet, as Takai kept right on sneezing. It was most definitely time for him to retreat from the outdoors, he decided as he tried and failed to answer the man in charge of the newsstand.

Finally giving up, the demigod withdrew some money from his pocket, slapped into onto the counter of the newsstand, and then ran off, his now rather damp copy of the Tattler in hand.

Still releasing at least one sneeze per second, Takai rushed into a nearby alleyway. Once within the cool shade of the semi-enclosed little area, he closed his eyes and concentrated. The shadows seemed to envelop him, and he vanished from the alleyway.

He reappeared a moment later in a dim and rarely used office within NERV headquarters. The demigod continued to sneeze relentlessly for several seconds, but now that he was indoors, breathing re-circulated air, the fit eventually subsided.

"Might as well get some work done while I'm here," he grumbled to himself as he wiped his watery eyes with his handkerchief.

Takai booted up the room's sole computer, allowing the monitor to cast its eerie, bluish glow over his face. Utilizing the MAGI username and password he had earned by keeping Wonder Girl from involving herself with the battle against the Seventh Angel, he logged into the system.

"Oh, Gamma Level clearance," he said as he watched words scroll across the screen. "Sounds… unimportant."

Well, he supposed that he couldn't have expected Ikari to trust him completely, and really, the man was wise to keep his cards close to his vest.

Fortunately, the son of Hades was not much concerned about the particulars of Gendo Ikari's plan to invoke Third Impact. Takai would still consider it a win if the Commander's plan succeeded, so he had little use for the organization's darker secrets. No, it was NERV's public mission—that of stopping the Angels—that he sought to learn about and disrupt.

Gamma Level clearance proved good enough to view at least parts of the pilots' NERV dossiers, and Takai brought them up and began to read them with a small smile.

Large chunks of each had obviously been redacted, and in the case of the First Child, there was almost nothing there to begin with, but what was present was quite illuminating. There were evaluations of the pilots' personalities, as well as brief personal histories, both on and off the battlefield.

Clearly, the Second and Third Children were the most important to NERV's war effort. Pilot Ikari had the most combat experience and the highest number of kills, while Soryu had the most advanced Evangelion and the greatest amount of training. Ayanami was a distant third when it came to the importance of the pilots, possessing the lowest sync ratio and the often erratic prototype Evangelion; she couldn't hope to hold the fort by herself for any length of time.

After rereading and memorizing the dossiers of the two "important" pilots, Takai shut off the computer he was working at. Then his form melted into the room's shadows and he disappeared.

It was almost time for another dose of his allergy meds.


Tentatively dog paddling around the shallow end of the NERV pool, Shinji thought he was starting to really and truly believe that he could do something in water other than sink like a stone and drown.

"You are doing well, Shinji," Rei spoke softly as she observed from nearby. "You will be ready for the deep end soon, I believe."

He turned to her and saw that there a small smile on her face, something that seemed to be an increasingly frequent sight.

"Thank you, Rei," he said, standing up in the shallow water. "It feels like I'm learning how to do this very slowly, though."

Rei secretly felt that he was correct. His progress seemed very slow to her. However, she did not think it would be…tactful to agree with him.

"We never had any set timetable for how quickly you should learn," Rei responded instead.

"I suppose so," Shinji replied.

Rei was about to suggest that he attempt the breast stroke when the door to the NERV pool opened.

"Hello, you two!" Asuka called to them in a too cheery sounding voice as she strode inside.

Shinji's eyes widened as he took in the redhead's form. Asuka was clad in a red and white striped bikini that had to be at least one size too small for her figure, which was obviously developing quite nicely. He was surprised to note that Asuka's build was just as toned and athletic as Rei's.

"Since we don't get to go to Okinawa, I thought I'd do it here," Asuka announced.

"Do what here?" Shinji asked, suddenly finding himself totally unable to even guess as to what Asuka had been referring to.

"Scuba diving, of course!" Asuka said, holding up the small tank and mask she had brought in with her.

Shinji hadn't even noticed she was carrying anything until that moment.

The Second Child went about the task of getting herself into the scuba gear, bending over in the process and allowing Shinji a rather splendid view. He knew that he really should look away, but for once, his teenage hormones had grasped the reins and kept his gaze fixed on the blossoming redhead.

Next to him, Rei narrowed her eyes dangerously. She was quite sure that she was again experiencing the jealousy that Aphrodite had spoken of, but she didn't really care. All she cared about was the hostility she was currently feeling for the Second Child, and the effect the redhead appeared to be having on Shinji.

If Asuka noticed Rei glaring at her, she gave no indication of it. "Lookie, lookie!" the Second Child called. "Back roll entry!"

She entered the pool with a splash, and the weighted belt she'd put on allowed her to sink to the bottom. Yet the spell the redhead had cast on Shinji did not seem to be broken. A scowl crept over Rei's usually impassive face.

Then, a memory of something Aphrodite had told her once whispered into her ear. Sometimes, even the best of men just need a cold shower.

It was an intriguing idea. The problem was that there was no cold water at hand; the pool water was lukewarm at worst.

I suppose it will have to do, Rei decided, striking the surface of the water and sending a splash toward Shinji.

The water hit the Third Child's back, and he recoiled as though he'd been struck by something far more powerful, then turned to look at Rei, a guilty expression on his face.

Still very naïve when it came to human interactions, the First Child didn't understand why Shinji would look guilty. Despite understanding Asuka a bit better after having lived with her for a while, Rei was still quite willing to direct any and all hostility she felt over the brief incident at the redhead.

At a loss on how to proceed, Rei splashed him again.

Once more, Shinji recoiled, if not as dramatically this time. Then he blinked at Rei several times, a look of complete shock on his face that the First Child didn't quite understand the reason for.

Then he splashed the First Child back.

Rei almost reflexively responded in kind, and suddenly water was flying through the air between them as though they were caught in the middle of a tempest.

She heard a sound above all the splashing, and she suddenly realized that Shinji was laughing. It was not at all an unpleasant sound, but Rei was still surprised to hear it from the usually somber Third Child.

Yet she was more surprised still to realize that a silly sort of grin had crept onto her own face as they fought with water. The discovery that she was getting so much enjoyment from doing something as pointless as splashing Shinji in the pool nearly stupefied her.

Eventually, Shinji's arms started to get tired, and his watery attacks slowed, then stopped. Rei could have kept splashing him, of course; her Amazon body was far harder to fatigue, but she also ceased her efforts. For a moment, the two teenagers just stood there, looking at each other and grinning stupidly. Shinji was panting slightly.

"That was…fun," Rei commented softly after a few moments.

"Yeah," Shinji agreed, "it was."

Impulsively, he reached up and moved a lock of soaked blue hair out of her face. His fingers felt surprisingly warm against her damp skin, and Rei noted that her heartbeat sped up considerably as he touched her. Shinji's hand froze, as though he'd suddenly realized what he was doing, and his face grew flushed. Rei's own cheeks became a shade of delicate pink. She could feel the heat in her face.

Then the moment was interrupted by a splash from the far side of the pool. The two of them both turned their heads and then froze in place as they saw Asuka climbing out of the water. They'd both forgotten entirely that they weren't alone in the pool room.

Getting out of the water entirely, the redhead removed the goggles she was wearing and turned her head to look at her fellow pilots, who were still standing there, motionless, in a rather intimate looking position.

Asuka didn't say a word. She just a heaved a dramatic, disgusted sigh and stalked off, looking rather funny while she did so because she didn't bother to take off the flippers she was wearing first.

Then she was out the door and gone, but the moment had long since been ruined. Shinji moved his hand away from Rei's face and backed away from her slightly.

"I believe we can call your swimming lessons finished for today," Rei said.

"Yeah," Shinji agreed.

The two of them got out of the pool and made their way to one of the white plastic tables nearby, where a couple of white fluffy towels waited. Picking them up, the two pilots started to dry themselves off.

"You know, Rei, you've really changed," Shinji commented.

The First Child turned her ruby gaze on him and quirked one slim, blue eyebrow. "How so?" she asked.

"Uh…" Shinji started to sweat, immediately fearing that he'd just put his foot into his mouth and was only going to shove it further down his throat. "Well, you just seem more…alive. And…happier, I guess."

"I see," was Rei's simple, perfectly neutral reply.

Shinji wasn't quite sure if he'd messed up or not. Unlike Asuka, Rei could be angry without being obvious about it.

Well, except for that one incident when he'd spoken ill about his father and Rei had expressed her anger by slapping him in the face, but that was a long time ago.

"You have changed, too," she said, the barest hint of a smile on her face.

"Huh?"

Rei ignored his confusion. "I believe you said that Captain Katsuragi ordered you to perform extra credit assignments while the rest of class 2-A is at Okinawa," she said. "My own grades are quite good. If you wish, I will assist you in your work. I would suggest that Saito's Creamery is an excellent place for quiet study." She finished with just a trace of a grin.

Shinji chuckled. It was always funny whenever Rei displayed her newly developed sense of humor, in spite of (or perhaps because of) how subtle it was and how she was always able to keep a straight face.

"I'll buy the ice cream," he said.


As the First and Third Children were returning to their respective locker rooms to change into their street clothes, Asuka Langley Soryu was just leaving the Geofront, arriving in the city above the underground base.

Scuba diving in the NERV pool had been about as boring as the lectures she had to endure in the damn junior high school she'd been stuck in. In Okinawa, there were both sunken cities and the expected sea life to see. In the pool, there was nothing except tile.

Even worse, the two of them had completely ignored her to make kissy faces at each other, and if there was anything the Second Child hated, it was when nobody paid any attention to her.

Always thought there was something between those two, Asuka mused as she started wandering through the city streets.

The Second Child was, if she said so herself, pretty good at noticing such things. But while she'd certainly gotten that vibe from the other pilots when she'd been living with the both of them, they were both so quiet and muted that she hadn't been able to tell for sure until just now.

Wonder what she sees in him, Asuka thought. Sure, he piloted in her place that first time, but really, gratitude only extends so far.

Shaking her head, Asuka continued to walk around the city, looking for something to do rather than return to the apartment and start working on her extra credit assignment, which would've been stupidly easy for her if only it wasn't in Japanese.

Not that there actually was all that much to do in Tokyo-3, which was a very strange city in Asuka's not so humble opinion. The affluent part of the city was so clean and new that it didn't quite feel real; it seemed more like some phony city in a theme park or something. And with everyone moving out in the face of the Angels, the place was almost eerily quiet and empty for what was supposed to be a major city.

Lost in thought, Asuka didn't notice the young man who was also walking through the city, a large cup of soda in hand. The two collided, causing him to spill his drink on her. The redhead let out a yelp of surprise and displeasure as the cold brown liquid splashed all over her front.

"Hey!" she exclaimed indignantly.

"Excuse me," he replied in a calm tone, "I wasn't watching where I was going."

The young man's voice was rich and smooth, sending a small, pleasant shiver down her spine. Asuka felt a good portion of her anger drain away, and she diverted her gaze away from the large wet patch on her favorite dress to take a good look at the guy she'd crashed into.

He was probably about fourteen, her age, but he could have passed for older; he was tall and had unusually broad shoulders for a teenage boy just starting to grow into manhood. He had handsome, dark features, and she could tell that he wasn't entirely Japanese.

"This is probably ruined," she said with little actual heat in her voice, looking down at the stain on her yellow dress, "and it's my favorite one, too."

In sharp contrast to the Third Child, her new acquaintance didn't fall all over himself trying to apologize. "The mall's only a couple of blocks from here. How about I buy you a new one?" he asked, a trace of a smile on his face.

Asuka smirked. "Careful there. I have expensive tastes."

The corners of his mouth quirked upwards. "I think my bank account will survive, Miss…?"

"Asuka Langley Soryu," she replied.

"The pilot of the red Evangelion?" he asked, looking impressed.

Beaming, the Second Child held herself a little bit straighter and put her hands on her hips. "That's me," she said. "So, what's your name, big spender?"

"Takai Banryu," he answered.

"Takai," Asuka repeated. "That's not a very common name, is it?"

"My parents weren't very common people," he replied. "Now, if you want me to buy you a new dress…" he gestured in the direction of the mall.

Grinning, she grabbed hold of his arm and started to pull him toward the center of commerce.

Not much later, Asuka was in one of the fitting rooms of a women's clothing store, while Takai sat in a chair outside.

"So," Asuka said as she removed her soda stained yellow dress and began to exchange it for a new red one, "I haven't seen you around the school. You just move here or are you home schooled?"

"I already have my high school degree," Takai answered. "Right now, I'm working a degree at an online college. I'd like to go to a real one, but I just don't have the money."

"That's too bad," Asuka said, her opinion of this young man rising another notch as she discovered how intelligent he had to be.

"That's life, I guess," Takai replied.

"Could be worse," Asuka said. "I have a college degree—"

"You managed to earn a degree by fourteen, while training to pilot an Evangelion?" Takai interrupted her.

Asuka glowed with pleasure. "Oh, it wasn't that hard," she lied dismissively. "Anyway, even though I have a degree, my guardian makes me go to junior high school classes for some stupid reason. You should be glad your parents don't subject you to that."

"They can't," Takai replied. "I have emancipated youth status, and I live on my own."

"Really?" Asuka said, impressed by her new acquaintance's independence.

Not many people were mature enough to be self-sufficient at fourteen, Asuka knew. Only people who were older than their years, like herself, could do that. Shinji's stooge friends probably would've started crying for mommy after ten minutes if they ever tried to live alone.

"Yes," Takai said. "My mother's dead, so I'm on my own."

"What about your father?" Asuka asked.

"Living with him just wouldn't be a good idea," Takai said.

"Gott, I hear that," Asuka replied, shuddering at the idea of living with her own father again.

Finished dressing, the Second Child emerged from the fitting room in her new dress. A slow smile spread over Takai's handsome face as he looked her up and down. "You look beautiful," he said.

"Thank you," Asuka replied with a grin. "I think I'll take this one."

He paid for her new dress as he'd promised, then the two of them left the store, stepping back out into the mall.

"Asuka," Takai spoke.

"Yes?"

"Would you like to go for a coffee or something with me?" he asked.

She paused to consider, even though she already knew the answer. "Yeah, I think I—"

The redhead was cut off as her cell phone started to ring. "Sorry, I have to take this," she said, taking her phone from her pocket and flipping it open. "What?" she scowled as she answered.

"We've found an Angel," Misato said in a no nonsense tone of voice. "We need you to report to headquarters, now."

"Understood. I'm coming," Asuka replied, then hung up and turned back to Takai. "Sorry, Takai, duty calls. I have to go."

"Oh, all right," he said. "In that case could I get your—"

"Give me your cell phone," the redhead said.

Takai didn't question the order. He just handed his phone over. Asuka quickly pushed several buttons on it and handed it back to him. Takai saw that she had programmed her number into it.

"Call me," Asuka said with a grin, before walking off to head for NERV with a couple of Section Two agents who had stepped forward after inexpertly shadowing the Second Child the whole time she'd been outside the Geofront.

"I will," Takai promised with a smile.

Then Asuka and her escorts melted into the crowd at the mall, leaving him alone. Takai allowed himself a grin of triumph as he walked off; that had gone even better than he'd expected.

Of course, he could have easily killed her right then, but with her bodyguards around, it wouldn't have been smart. If Ikari found out that his new secret weapon against Wonder Girl had murdered one of the pilots, Takai could kiss his new level of access to NERV goodbye.

If he lost that access, and the death of the Second Child proved insufficient to allow the Angels to claim victory, his father would be very angry with him.

So he would bide his time, using his knowledge of Asuka to become her confidant, and when he felt confident he could get away with it, he would kill the pilot of EVA Unit Two.

But, before then, it looked like he had to head to the battlefield where NERV would be confronting the next Angel and wait, in case Wonder Girl tried to interfere again.

Slipping into one of the mall's public restrooms, Takai found a shadowy corner and stepped into it. Moments later, he was gone from the mall.


About twenty minutes after her fateful encounter on the streets of Tokyo-3, Asuka arrived at the room where the Operations Director intended to brief the pilots, finding that Misato, Shinji, Rei, and Ritsuko were already present.

"Glad you could join us, Asuka," Misato commented.

"Sorry, I was at the mall," the redhead replied with a dismissive wave, not sounding very apologetic at all to Rei's ears.

"Well, now that you're all here, we can begin," Misato said. "Earlier today, we discovered a still dormant Angel located inside of a volcano, Mount Asuma to be specific."

Ritsuko pressed a button on a small remote she was holding, and an image of the Angel in question was projected onto the floor. It looked quite a bit like a human fetus in the very early stages of development, but it was clearly much, much bigger.

"As you can see," the scientist said, "the Angel is obviously still in its embryonic stage. This may well represent the best chance we'll ever have to capture a live Angel. I can't overstate how useful that would be to NERV."

"How are we supposed to get it out of the volcano?" Shinji asked.

"By going in after it," Misato said. "With the D-type equipment, an Evangelion can withstand even a dip in molten lava. So one of you is going to have to go magma diving."

"I'll do it!" Asuka said at once. "I love diving."

Rei felt a small drop of sweat form on the back of her head. How some minor experience with scuba made her more qualified to take a dip in an active volcano, she couldn't even begin to guess.

Misato nodded. "Yes, Asuka, you're the one who's going," she said. "Shinji will be waiting at the top of the volcano as backup."

"What about me?" Rei asked.

"The prototype isn't compatible with the D-type equipment," Ritsuko answered. "Therefore, you'll remain here as reserve."

"Aw, poor Rei," Asuka mocked. "She doesn't get to have any fun."

Everyone present cast a dirty look at the redhead. She didn't seem to notice.

"All right, Shinji, Asuka, get changed and get to the cages," Misato said. "We're leaving as soon as all the preparations are made."


About an hour later, Rei Ayanami was returning to her apartment, since there was no need for her unless the Angel somehow exited the volcano, evaded both Units Two and One, and made its way to Tokyo-3. Simply put, it was unlikely in the extreme that NERV would have any use for the First Child in this battle.

Of course, that didn't mean that Wonder Girl had to sit down and stay put. Upon entering her home, Rei quickly unlocked Pandora's Box and began to change into her armor.

She had just pulled her leotard up her body when the door to her apartment suddenly opened, and Apollo strode inside, wearing his bronze armor.

Normally, Rei wouldn't have cared much about someone barging into her home without knocking. Since it was Apollo, however, she was tempted to literally throw him out for the offense.

"Oh, good," the god said. "Glad to see that you're suiting up."

Rei glared coldly at him as she finished adjusting her rather revealing magic armor, then grabbed her tiara and lasso. "I am going to Mount Asuma to assist in defeating the Angel there," she stated.

"Ah, well, I'm afraid you're not," Apollo said.

"And why is that?" Rei asked, even as she continued her preparations to head for the volcano.

"I've come to collect that favor you owe me, Champion of the Amazons," Apollo said with a smirk on his face.

That stopped her short. She knew that, however much she might not like it, she had to pay her debt to Apollo. Even Athena had said so, and she'd been intent on changing Apollo's favorite son into an insect at the time. To refuse him was to invite the wrath of a god.

"Must it be now?" she asked in an annoyed tone.

"This is a time sensitive task I have for you," Apollo said. "So yes, you have to go now."

"If one of my fellow pilots dies because I wasn't there…if Shinji dies…"

"You'll storm Mount Olympus and tear down my temple there brick by brick, then disembowel me and bury me in the rubble, I'm sure," Apollo replied, sounding bored.

Wonder Girl just glared at him.

Apollo sighed. "I give you my word as an immortal god that the other Evangelion pilots will survive this battle, uninjured, without the intervention of the Wonder Girl, hard though that may be to believe."

"You are certain?" Wonder Girl asked.

"You did teach Ikari about thermal expansion, correct?" Apollo asked.

Wonder Girl blinked, having no idea what that had to do with anything. "Yes," she answered.

"Then, yes, I am absolutely certain," Apollo said.

"Fine," Wonder Girl finally gave in. "What do you wish me to do?"

"Over the years, nearly all of my temples have been desecrated by groups of so-called 'scientists' looking for artifacts," Apollo said with distaste. "There is only one left that remains undisturbed, and at this very moment, an archeologist is on the verge of discovering it."

"And you wish for me to stop her," Wonder Girl surmised.

"Correct," Apollo said. "I want you to do whatever it takes to ensure that my temple will not be invaded by a horde of archeologists and all the artifacts taken away."

It sounded to Wonder Girl that Apollo wanted her to kill this archeologist, but she wasn't going to murder a woman just for doing her job. Regardless of that, the task sounded like a very easy one. Keeping a normal woman from finding the temple would be no challenge for her.

She wondered why Apollo was letting her off so easily after she had essentially written him a blank check. She wanted to ask but feared that would get him to change his mind, making her perform a much more difficult task. Perhaps, she reasoned, he feared retaliation from Athena unless the task he gave her was a simple one.

"Very well," Wonder Girl agreed. "Where is this temple?"

Smiling, Apollo reached out and placed a hand on Wonder Girl's shoulder.

For a moment, her universe was filled with golden, nearly blinding sunlight. Then her vision cleared, and she was no longer in her apartment. Instead, she found herself standing in a green forest. Looking up, her crimson eyes widened as she saw walls of stone soaring at least a kilometer high to either side.

"Where are we?" she asked.

"This is the Vikos Gorge in Greece," Apollo answered.

"I was under the impression that temples were built in places where people could go and worship, such as cities," Wonder Girl said. "Why would anyone build a temple to you in this place?"

"You think that there weren't any people with strange ideas in ancient times?" Apollo asked.

Wonder Girl's shoulders moved the tiniest fraction of an inch in an approximation of a shrug. "I suppose you have a point," she said. "Where is the temple?"

"To the north," Apollo said. "The intrepid archeologist is to the south, heading toward my temple. Go and stop her."

"Very well," Wonder Girl said, heading off into the dense foliage and leaving Apollo behind her.

Not terribly keen on the task she had been given to begin with, she took her time in searching for the archeologist. As she went, she took the opportunity to observe the scenery. Having lived her whole life in Tokyo-3, she had never been around so much greenery before. Not even Themyscria was quite so untamed as the bottom of the Vikos Gorge.

It was pleasant, she decided. Disorganized but organized. Alive and wild. Beautiful, even.

I wonder if Shinji has ever been to a place like this before? Wonder Girl thought. If not, perhaps we could go to one together.

A rustle ahead of her instantly caused the champion of the gods to snap out of her thoughts and return her attention to her task. No matter how easy this job was, sloppiness was unbecoming of an Amazon warrior.

It wasn't long before the archeologist Apollo had sent her to stop appeared from out of the dense foliage. She was a woman with auburn hair, dressed all in khaki with a large pack on her back. Perhaps in her thirties, she was an attractive but unremarkable looking individual.

"Good lord," the archeologist said in English, a faint British accent to her words. "Are you…?"

Glad that she had studied languages during the long, blank years that had preceded the arrival of the Third Angel, the Amazon replied, "I am known as the Wonder Girl. I'm sorry, but I cannot permit you to go any further."

The woman didn't seem to have heard her. Her gaze was locked on the rope that was at the blue haired superwoman's hip. "Is that the golden lasso of the Amazons?" she asked.

"What? Yes, I suppose it is," Wonder Girl answered. "But I said that I cannot allow you to proceed. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is. If you wish, I can easily get you out of the gorge."

"Oh no. I won't be leaving the gorge any time soon." The archeologist said, a slow smile creeping over her face.

"I do not think you understand," the Amazon said. "I will not allow you to remain and find the temple."

"The one who doesn't understand is you, I'm afraid. I've heard of you, Wonder Girl, and I know what you're capable of. But I'm not leaving until I find that temple," Barbara Ann Minerva said, "and take that lasso away from you!"

Before Wonder Girl's eyes, the archeologist abruptly changed. Pale skin was suddenly covered in spotted, yellow-brown fur. The woman's nose became wider and flatter, and a tail sprouted from her hindquarters. More importantly, wicked looking black claws burst from the ends of her fingers, and lithe, ropey muscles abruptly formed in her previously slender limbs.

"Not even you can stop the Cheetah, Wonder Girl!" the archeologist turned anthromorph hissed, right before launching herself at Wonder Girl.

The Amazon's mind was a total blank as she watched the Cheetah surge toward her. Her brain was just frozen with shock at this bizarre turn of events.

However, thanks to all the training she had endured on Themyscria, her body reacted to the attack even as her head was still spinning. Wonder Girl's fist lashed out, striking the Cheetah right in the shoulder mere seconds before the feline woman's long claws could touch her. The Cheetah let out a loud, angry yowl—not unlike what a cat would emit when its tail was stepped on—and went flying.

It looked like she was about to crash into a tree, but the Cheetah was far too agile for that. Somehow twisting her body about in midair, she managed to get her feet back on solid ground, sliding backwards a few feet before coming to a stop. Releasing another angry hiss, the Cheetah scurried up the very tree that it had looked she was about to break her spine on a moment ago, disappearing into its leafy boughs.

Unwilling to allow her foe to hide, Wonder Girl quickly made her way to the base of the tree. Rather than climb or fly up into its leaves, however, she wrapped her arms around the truck of the tree. She pulled upwards, releasing a small grunt as she did so, and the roots of the tree burst out of the ground, great clumps of dark earth still sticking to them. She began to shake the tree fiercely, attempting to dislodge the Cheetah.

However, the suddenly feline femme was not so easily thrown from her perch. Even after the Amazon shook the tree for several seconds, she did not fall out. Then, in a flash of movement so fast she would have missed it if she had blinked at the wrong moment, Wonder Girl saw the Cheetah leap from her current position into another, unmolested tree.

The Amazon instantly discarded the great tree she held and got into a defensive stance, silently cursing Apollo as she did so. She should have known that he wouldn't give her an easy task.

The rustling of leaves gave away the Cheetah's position, but the archeologist turned feline was moving so fast that it barely mattered. Wonder Girl could barely keep her eyes trained on the Cheetah's position as the feline jumped from tree to tree.

She is fast, the Amazon thought grimly. Faster than I am.

Just as Wonder Girl was trying to survey the area for a more defensible position, the Cheetah made her move, leaping from a nearby tree, directly at the Amazon's back. The blue haired superwoman heard her enemy coming and spun around to face her, but she wasn't quite quick enough.

The Cheetah's claws raked across the Amazon's shoulder, somehow managing to leave long, red gashes in Wonder Girl's normally impervious skin. The blue haired superwoman let out a cry of surprise and pain, even as she clamped down on the Cheetah's wrists.

The two of them began to grapple, and though the Cheetah was strong, Wonder Girl was stronger. The feline's eyes widened as her claws were forced away from her enemy.

"What are you?" Wonder Girl asked.

"A consummate professional in the field of archeology," the Cheetah replied with a smirk. "As you might have guessed, you're not the first fantastical thing I've ever encountered on my explorations. You probably won't be the last, either."

Just as she finished delivering her little spiel, the Cheetah's tail came up and wrapped itself around the Amazon's neck. Wonder Girl immediately started having trouble breathing as enough pressure was applied to her neck to cut off her airways.

The Cheetah smirked maliciously as the Amazon started to choke. Knowing that she need to do something fast, Wonder Girl abruptly bowed her head, which caused it to crash into the Cheetah's forehead. There was an audible knock from the impact, and the Cheetah looked dazed from the blow, but her grip didn't slacken.

Growing desperate, Wonder Girl repeated the attack several more times, ignoring the pain that bloomed in her own head as a result. The Cheetah's eyes became unfocused, but amazingly, her grip remained firm.

Finally, desperate for air, Wonder Girl released her hold on one of Cheetah's wrists and grabbed at the feline woman's tail.

Despite how woozy she must have been, the Cheetah struck instantly with her newly freed hand, raking her claws across the flesh by Wonder Girl's collar bone. The Amazon let out a grunt of pain, then wrapped her fingers around her enemy's tail and gave it a fierce tug, pulling it away from her neck and allowing herself to breathe. That done, she pulled her hand back, balling her fingers into a fist.

But the Cheetah attacked before she could strike. With a loud hiss, the feline woman leaned forward and sank her long fangs into Wonder Girl's shoulder. The Amazon's eyes widened as she felt pain shoot through her.

They must have fallen immediately after that, because the next thing the Amazon knew, she and her opponent were on the ground, and the battle had officially devolved completely into a brawl.

The two of them rolled around as they continued to struggle fiercely, with Wonder Girl fighting to get the Cheetah off of her. She would have eventually succeeded, too, if not for another stroke of bad luck in a day that seemed like it had been full of them.

The Cheetah happened to find a rock about twice the size of her fist as they continued to fight, and she grabbed it and swung hard at Wonder Girl's head. The rock shattered upon impact. The Amazon's skull didn't, but the blow was enough to leave her dizzy.

Immediately capitalizing upon her advantage, the Cheetah wrapped her powerful hands around Wonder Girl's neck. Dazed, bleeding, and not quite having recovered from the last time Cheetah had choked her, Wonder Girl found her vision tunneling almost instantly. She reached up to try and strike the Cheetah, or to attempt to pry the feline female's hands off her neck, but suddenly everything seemed strange. She felt like she was trying to reach for something that was very far away from her, and her hands couldn't seem to locate what they sought.

Then the blackness swept over her and she knew no more.


The Amazon awoke some indeterminate period of later, groaning softly. At first she was sorely tempted to allow herself to drift back into unconsciousness, if only to escape the throbbing pain in her head.

Then she remembered what had transpired before she'd passed out, and she instantly snapped to full wakefulness, immediately taking stock of her situation.

The slashes the Cheetah had inflicted on her were all closed, leaving only red marks that were already fading in their place. Given how quickly her superhuman body healed itself, that meant she hadn't been out for very long.

She was tied to a thick tree, and for one horrible second, Wonder Girl thought it was her magic lasso that held her there. However, a moment of closer inspection made it obvious that this was not so; the Cheetah had just used an ordinary rope that happened to be yellow in color.

However, her lasso was not at her hip. The feline female had clearly taken it with her.

Which means it is doubly important I escape and catch up to her, Wonder Girl thought grimly.

She wasn't sure which idea she loathed more: the punishment Apollo would doubtlessly dole out if she failed the mission he had assigned her, or having to tell Athena and perhaps even Queen Hippolyta that she had lost her golden lasso.

The rope the Cheetah had used to bind her was sturdy; the archeologist might have used it to rappel down into the gorge. It was also looped around her and the trunk of the tree over half a dozen times.

Wonder Girl broke it without effort, feeling reluctantly grateful that the Cheetah's greed had caused her to take it rather than use it to tie her up. If it was her unbreakable lasso that had held her, well, she might've had a problem there.

The blue haired superwoman flew off through the thick foliage, but she soon discovered that with all the trees in her path, it was quicker just to run. She had no difficulty following the Cheetah, and wouldn't have even if she didn't know where the archeologist was going.

Artemis would make me into a pincushion if I couldn't follow that trail after enduring her training, she thought, a small, wry smile appearing on her face as she went.

It wasn't long before the lost temple of Apollo came into view, with the Cheetah's trail leading straight into it. The temple had clearly once been a very grand edifice, and the blue haired superwoman couldn't begin to guess how a group of ancient Greeks could have gotten so much marble down into the gorge. However, the place was now crumbling and nearly overgrown with vegetation. In a few more decades or perhaps only a few years, nature would finish reclaiming the place, and the temple would be no more.

Ignoring the decrepit state of the ancient place of worship, Wonder Girl charged inside. The temple was like many she had seen on Themyscria and was dominated by one great room that had a large statue of Apollo standing on a pedestal in the center. Said statue was made from bronze, and like the rest of the place, it must have once been quite magnificent but was now badly tarnished.

The Cheetah was surveying various artifacts that she had found within the temple when the Amazon entered. Wonder Girl immediately spotted her lasso hanging at the feline female's hip.

"You have something that belongs to me," the blue haired superwoman said. "You will return it to me."

Looking up, the Cheetah sneered, "I'm afraid not, Wonder Girl," she said. "It's mine now, along with all of the artifacts in here. This will get my career back on track for sure."

"Perhaps I should rephrase what I said," the Amazon replied calmly. "Return my lasso to me, or I will take it from you."

"No," the Cheetah replied, raising a large bow he had found among the objects in the temple and knocking an arrow. "You will not."

Wonder Girl saw that the arrowhead had the distinctive gleam of Olympian bronze to it and was immediately on guard. Not even she could just shrug off a blow from a weapon made of that material.

The Cheetah loosened the bowstring, and the arrow sailed forward. But something was different. The already deadly arrow transformed into a bolt of golden light the moment it left the bow, streaking toward Wonder Girl at a far greater speed than it should have.

Caught by surprise, the Amazon only just raised her arm in time to block the attack with one of her gauntlets. The blast of light deflected off of her silver bracer and went flying into one of the walls of the temple, where it exploded violently, creating a large hole and causing large chunks of ancient marble to go flying through the air.

Olympian bronze does not do that, Wonder Girl thought.

It had to be the bow, she realized a moment later. Cheetah had found herself a magic item in this decrepit ruin, making the Amazon's job even harder.

She briefly wondered how much of this Apollo had planned, then decided that was ultimately irrelevant.

A feral smile crept over the Cheetah's face as she realized just what she had in her possession, and she started to knock and then fire arrows at Wonder Girl in rapid succession. They each changed into bolts of golden light like the first one had, but the Amazon was ready for them this time and deflected them with little difficulty. A trio of explosions sounded around the temple as the arrows hit the walls and erupted.

"You must stop," Wonder Girl commanded. "You will cause this place to collapse around us."

"I'm not giving up these artifacts!" the Cheetah snapped, as she readied yet another arrow.

Wonder Girl knew that she would never be able to get close enough to retrieve her lasso so long as the Cheetah was firing those arrows from that magic bow at her, and the feline femme had dozens of them at her disposal. She would bring the temple around their ears before she ran out of ammunition.

The blue haired superwoman realized what she would have to do. It was a course of action that was as likely to see her impaled as victorious, but death had never frightened Rei Ayanami, let alone the Wonder Girl.

The Cheetah fired. The Amazon didn't move her arms to block with her gauntlets.

As the arrow transformed into a bolt of deadly energy and sailed toward her, something happened to Wonder Girl's perceptions. It was something Queen Hippolyta had spoken of, but not something she'd ever experienced before, not even when Artemis had had a group of Amazonian archers open fire on her during her training.

Time seemed to slow down. Everything appeared to be happening in slow motion to Wonder Girl, and all her senses suddenly became extremely acute. She was aware of a drop of sweat that was running down the side of her face, of the smell of marble dust in the air, of the exact pattern of the spots on Cheetah's fur, and of the sound of the arrow whistling as it moved through the air at high speed.

But that didn't mean that what she intended became easy, only doable. When the arrow was little more than a hand's breadth away from her face, Wonder Girl reached up and wrapped her fingers around the shaft.

Reality abruptly returned to normal speed, and the Amazon suddenly realized that touching the enchanted arrow burned like it was on fire. Not only that, but it was still pressing forward, as though it was a rocket rather than an arrow, and it was taking a good deal of her incredible strength just to keep it from finishing its journey.

Grimacing, she turned the enchanted around, so it was facing toward the one who had shot it. The Cheetah's eyes widened.

"No!" she shouted.

Wonder Girl ignored her and let go of the arrow. It surged forward, seemingly faster than ever after having been restrained for a few seconds, as if holding it back had only made it eager. The feline femme didn't have enough time to even try and move.

However, the Amazon had not been aiming for the woman herself. Rather, the arrow struck the ground at her feet and exploded. The force of the blast sent the Cheetah flying through the air, where she was pelted with chunks of stone that had been blown out of the floor by the explosion. The transformed archeologist released a very catlike yowl of pain and indignation.

Wonder Girl didn't give her foe a moment to compose herself, immediately breaking out into a sprint toward the Cheetah. She reached her enemy only a moment after the feline femme had hit the floor, and quickly snatched her lasso away from the Cheetah.

"Yes," she said softly.

"No!" the Cheetah yelled, lashing out with the bow, which was still clutched in her paw.

Any normal wooden bow would had just broken into two pieces if used to hit the Wonder Girl that hard, but the weapon the Cheetah held was magic. It held together, even as it struck the Amazon hard enough to briefly send her reeling.

Unrelenting, the Cheetah instantly hopped to her feet and bashed Wonder Girl with the bow again and again, causing the blue haired superwoman to go staggering back several steps.

Then one of the Amazon's small hands shot out and grabbed hold of the bow before it could hit her again, stopping the Cheetah's swing cold.

The anthromorphic archeologist immediately tried to lash out with the claws on her free hand, but Wonder Girl grabbed her wrist, halting that assault just as soundly.

Then the Amazon felt the Cheetah's tail wrap around her neck once more. The feline femme grinned wickedly, her eyes shining with gleeful malice at the way her enemy had maneuvered them back into this position.

Not this time, Wonder Girl thought, bringing her right leg up and delivering a fierce kick to the Cheetah's torso.

The Cheetah let a loud cry as the force of the attack sent her flying. The feline went sailing into the air until she struck one of the temple's marble columns dead on with a dull thunk.

The pillar of white stone, not very stable to begin with, was unable to take the impact. It fell right over, landing on the floor with a loud crash as it shattered into pieces.

And then the entire temple started to shudder and rumble. It was beginning to collapse.

Wonder Girl ran toward her foe, who was just lying on the floor next to the remains of the broken pillar, groaning softly.

"Cheetah," she said, pulling the transformed woman up into a sitting position. "We must escape before the temple collapses on us. Can you walk?"

The feline's response was to release a short roar worthy of her namesake and to backhand the Amazon. The attack catching her by surprise, Wonder Girl was sent sailing through the air, coming to a landing on the other side of the temple's large main room. She was about to rush over toward the Cheetah again when the rumbling sound above them suddenly grew louder. Her eyes snapped upwards just in time to see great chunks of the ceiling come tumbling downwards. The Amazon braced herself, knowing that what was coming would be unpleasant.

And then she disappeared in a flash of golden sunlight.


The next thing Wonder Girl knew, she was back in her dingy apartment, and Apollo was scowling down at her.

"How—?"

"I brought you back here," the god cut her off.

"Please, send me back," the Amazon replied. "That other woman was probably buried by the debris."

"She'll be fine. Particularly annoying mortals like her always are," Apollo grumbled, before turning the full force of his glare down on the champion of the Amazons. "You destroyed my temple."

"It was…incidental," Wonder Girl replied. "However, it achieved the objective. You instructed me to do whatever I had to do to prevent the place from being invaded by a horde of archeologists. I believe it is safe to say that no one will be descending upon that pile of rubble."

Wonder Girl might not have been able to keep her face blank if she hadn't had so much practice at it. She had a feeling the god might turn her to dust on the spot if she dared to let the slightest trace of smile onto her face, but it was remarkably satisfying to have paid Apollo back for everything he'd done to her. Even if it had been by accident.

Apollo regarded her for a long, long moment, as though searching her soul for any hint that she had destroyed his temple deliberately.

Apparently finding none, he finally spoke. "Very well. This was not at all what I had in mind, but I suppose I must call your debt to me paid," he said. "However, you can expect no more help from Apollo."

With that, the god turned and stalked out of her apartment.

Good riddance, Wonder Girl thought.


Meanwhile, halfway across the world, the Cheetah was trapped in the remains of the temple she had sought to excavate. Though her superhuman agility and speed had allowed her to avoid most of the pieces of the ceiling as they had come raining down, one particularly large piece had finally caught her and had pinned her legs.

"Damn that bitch," the Cheetah growled as she tried to move the piece of rubble that kept her trapped.

Her efforts failed to so much as budge the thing; while she was faster than Wonder Girl, she was nowhere near as strong, and in her current position, she couldn't gain any leverage to make the task easier.

As the minutes ticked by, the transformed archeologist's anger started to change into fear. With the disappearance of the Amazon, there wasn't another person around for miles. If she couldn't free herself, she wasn't going to get free.

Just before her fear changed to panic and she began to scream pointlessly for help, a voice spoke from behind her.

"Need some help, Dr. Minerva?"

The Cheetah turned her head to look at the new arrival, finding a young man garbed in ancient Greek armor that had been forged from a black metal.

"Who are you?" she asked, all too conscious of how vulnerable she was in her current position.

"In some circles I'm known as the Dark Centurion," he answered. "My father told me I'd find a lady in distress here. Tell me, what is my help in freeing you from this situation worth to you?"


Author's Notes: When I first sat down to write it, I really expected this chapter to be more filler than anything else. I had no ideas for Rei interfering in this Angel battle, so I needed to find some reason to keep her from going to Mount Asuma. Having Apollo tap her for the favor she owes him worked, and I figured I could take the opportunity to bring in an actual Wonder Woman villain and inject some action. So far as archenemies of major heroes go, the Cheetah tends to come off as pretty second-tier, but I figured, what the heck?

Then I actually sat down to write this out, and I found myself setting down a lot of the groundwork for stuff that will happen in later chapters, Takai and Asuka's relationship not being the least of them. So, all in all, I have to say I'm more pleased with this chapter than I expected to be.

Quathis, though I like Gold Digger, I've never read that particular issue. The idea for the perverted skeletons came from my beta reader. He might have gotten it from GD, though.

Gunman, the other gods can't really do much to Hades, seeing as how he's already been banished from Olympus. Also, I really don't want to cross this over with Percy Jackson. This stories probably influence this fic too much as it is, and adding more universes to the mix always makes fics harder to control.

Aoirann, I admit I don't really like that either, which makes me rather embarrassed that I'm doing it myself in this fic. It's pretty damn easy to paint Hades as a villain, I'm discovering.

Anyway, thanks as always to my readers and reviewers, and thanks to my beta reader as well.

Now for some fun!


Omakes

Care Package (guest omake by my beta reader)

(A/N: Having seen the USA Network's commercials for Burn Notice—an awesome show in my humble opinion—will make this easier to get. Knowing about the crazy universe my beta reader has formed which crosses over roughly every fictional universe ever would also help.)

Rei stood there as Apollo left her apartment, fuming at the God for his …. what was the term that Captain Katsuragi used some times? 'Assholeness'.

Yeah. It fit right now-even if Rei did not say it aloud, lest she find out the hard way that Apollo had decided to stick around.

She stood there, staring at the door, for a pretty long time. And it surprised her when it answered back.

It was a knock, a pretty quiet one, but one that her enhanced senses could pick up with ease. Blinking in surprise, she walked to the door and opened it, looking around and then to the floor. There was a package on the floor, long and thin, with a series of 'OVERNITE' labels on it. Picking it up, Rei found it to be hefty (but nothing that she could not handle), and she took it inside, closing the door behind her.

The package, when opened, revealed to be full of gizmos of several kinds, with a neatly-folded letter on top, which she opened.

"Dear Rei," the letter read. "I understand that recently you have had to face off against a bad guy that the Tattler has labeled the 'Dark Centurion' as well as having been forced to do things that you have not been willing to do by those at the Pantheon. I know exactly what that is like, and I support that you will do what is right and do grievous bodily damage to those that try to stand in your way. I have, however, enclosed some items that I believe might come in handy."

Rei looked at the inside of the pack and started to pull out the item within, reading the letter as she did so..

"Inside you will find: a pair of sunglasses, because you need to 'look cool' while you do your assignments. It is also a normal item among pilots." Said sunglasses were sleek and blue, and she put them on the table

"Also, you will find a bottle of sunscreen, because even invulnerable skins can develop conditions if constantly exposed to the elements." The dark brown bottle of Coppertone that Rei pulled out said that it was classified for 'atomic explosion' intensity, and Rei applied a little of it to her hand, sniffing it and finding the coconut smell satisfying.

"As well, for the case of self-defense, enclosed you will find a spray. Its combination of capsicum, hallucinogens and catnip might come in handy if you ever need to blind an enemy." The little keychain-sized spray had the label 'DIGGERS TECHNOLOGIES 'CRYBABY'-KRYPTONIAN-STRENGTH POTENCY' on it, and Rei placed it on the table very gently, reading the warning labels that mentioned such things as 'in case of accidental exposure, contact your local eye surgeon.'

"You will also find a block of C-6 and a pair of Demolition Grenades, because you never know when you will need a stable plastic explosive, or to destroy a building by means other than your strength. I suggest you be careful about the Demolition Grenades, since they are pretty powerful." The lump of dark gray material and the two small dark maroon canisters were set on the table like they were made of glass-although actually, it was more like they would go off if she even looked at them funny.

"Finally…" Rei noticed the final (and biggest) item in the box and paused her reading to pull it out, hefting it ion her hand. The large sword (or what she supposed to be a sword) had jagged teeth and what looked like an engine near the handgrip, a large red button jutting from its bottom where her thumb could easily press it as she wielded it. The sword also had the color pattern of her uniform, blue for the grip, red and gold for the rest of it.

"Finally," she resumed reading. "An Angevin-Pattern Chainsword. It is powered by Unobtanium, so you do not need worry about recharging it, and you will find the maintenance manual on the box as well. A Chainsword is not a practical weapon of war, as it were, although its intimidation factor is a massive plus when facing off against an enemy-you will find out that not even the bravest of demons or gods like the idea of having a chainsaw stuck on their entrails. I sincerely suggest that you practice with it before using it in actual battle."

"Best of luck, your friend and sister, Rei Ayanami (Alternate # 08018-z-018, a.k.a. 'Wonder Girl')."

Rei stood there for a moment, then picked up a pen and scribbled a few choice words of the letter on the paper, noticing that her handwriting matched it in full.

Rei looked at the chainsword for a moment and then thumbed the red button, the sword kicking it with a purring it like kitten's. She took a couple of experimental swings with it and then copied a word that she had heard Captain Katsuragi say a few times:

"Groovy."

On the other side of the fourth wall, on the country of Costa Rica, Marco Salazar Matamoros sat before his computer, with all-too-familiar albino girl grasping his head in a half-nelson.

"She got the package, see?", he said to the albino girl, "Now can you let go of my head, please? I think I'm losing feeling of my right side."

The albino girl (Rei Ayanami (Alternate # 08018-z-018))looked at the computer screen for a few seconds and then let go, nodding in satisfaction and then leaving the room. Marco reset his glasses on his face and then huffed out a 'you're welcome' before starting to write again on his computer.

"This is what I get for letting her read stuff with me…" he muttered.


Bastard-Off!

"You wanted to see me, sir?" Takai asked as he walked in the NERV Commander's cavernous office.

"Correct," Gendo replied. "It has come to my attention that you are currently preparing to do several bastardly things, including backstabbing multiple people, and doubtlessly inflicting great emotional distress upon the Second Child eventually, assuming you do not just kill her."

Swallowing, Takai just stood there, wondering where this was going and how quickly he could shadow teleport away.

"It would appear that you're trying to be a bigger manipulative bastard than I am," Gendo said. "That is unacceptable."

Relieved, Takai smiled slightly. "Well, sir, if I'm just that much better at it than you, I don't think you have much of a choice to accept it."

Gendo fumed. This was difficult to tell, because the cold man looked exactly the same as any other time when he was fuming. But he fumed, all right.

"We must settle this right now," he said.

"There are only two ways to determine which of us is the bigger bastard right now," Takai said. "A bunny, puppy, and kitten killing contest, or—"

"Staring contest," Gendo said seriously.

Silently, Takai grabbed a chair and sat next to the Commander's desk, opposite him. The two both folded their hands in front of their face and began to just stare silently at each other.

"You can't hope to win this," Gendo said after a few minutes. "Do you know what people refer to the pose we are both in? They call it 'the Gendo pose.' I am the original cold, evil bastard."

"I'm the son of the death god," Takai replied. "I think that evens the score a bit."

The resumed staring at each other for several minutes.

Then Fuyutski entered the office, frowning as he took in the scene before him. "What are you two doing?" he asked.

"A staring contest," Takai answered, not looking away from Gendo.

"You can't be serious," Fuyutski said incredulously.

"I am always serious, Sensei," Gendo replied, also not diverting his gaze.

"So…the first one to blink loses?" Fuyutski asked after a moment.

"No," Takai and Gendo both replied in unison.

"First one to smile loses?" the old man asked.

"No," they said again, voices perfectly flat.

"Then how do you determine who wins?" Fuyutski asked, throwing his hands up in the air in a gesture of consternation.

"The one who manages to suck out the other's soul with nothing more than the steely power of his coldly malevolent gaze is the victor," Gendo said.

"Indeed," Takai agreed.

"Oh," Fuyutski said, "I see. If you'll excuse me, I have to go…be somewhere that's not here now."

"Very well, you're dismissed," Gendo said.

Fuyutski quickly left the room. "Idiots," he grumbled once the door had closed behind him.


The Dangers of Being Impatient

"Call me," Asuka said with a grin, before walking off to head for NERV with a couple of Section Two agents who had stepped forward after inexpertly shadowing the Second Child the whole time she'd been outside the Geofront.

"I will," Takai promised with a smile.

Then Asuka and her escorts melted into the crowd at the mall, leaving him alone. Takai allowed himself a grin of triumph as he walked off; that had gone even better than he'd expected.

Of course, he could have easily killed her right then, but with her bodyguards around, it wouldn't have been smart. If Ikari found out that his new secret weapon against Wonder Girl had murdered one of the pilots, Takai could kiss his new level of access to NERV goodbye.

So he would bide his time, using his knowledge of Asuka to become her confidant, and when he felt confident he could get away with it, he would kill the pilot of EVA Unit Two.

"Eh, screw it," he muttered to himself. "I'll just kill her now."

He jogged into the crowd after her. "Asuka!" he called.

The redhead stopped and turned around. "Yes?"

"Say good-night!" he yelled, producing a wicked looking knife and charging toward her before the two goons in the black suit could stop him.

The tip of the blade connected right in the center of the Second Child's throat…and then broke, leaving her quite unharmed.

For several long seconds, Takai just stared dumbly at the remains of his knife.

Then all the pieces started to come together in his head.

"Oh, crap," he breathed.

Asuka sighed. "I guess it's true what they say. The cute ones are all taken, gay, or insane," she observed, while cracking her knuckles menacingly.

Takai turned and try to run. The Second Child reached out and grabbed his shoulder, stopping him. Her hand felt a vice clamping down on him.

"Where do you think you're going?" she asked.

Takai just whimpered in response.


Basic Rules of Super Villainy

The Amazon awoke some indeterminate period of later, groaning softly. At first she was sorely tempted to allow herself to drift back into unconsciousness, if only to escape the throbbing pain in her head.

Then she remembered what had transpired before she'd passed out, and she instantly snapped to full wakefulness, immediately taking stock of her situation.

She was tied to a thick tree, and she realized to her horror that the Cheetah had used her magic lasso to bind her. Not even her incredible strength could break the golden rope. She would be trapped until the Cheetah came back for her, if she ever did!

Then the solution to her problem struck her.

"Oh," she said. "Duh."

The Cheetah was surveying all the splendid artifacts she had found when she heard a crashing sound from the entrance to the temple. The feline femme instantly tensed, suspecting it was the Wonder Girl again, but how could that be? She had been securely tied to a tree with an indestructible rope.

"Cheetah, I believe we have unfinished business to conclude," the blue haired Amazon said as she came into view.

The feline super villain felt like smacking herself as she saw her foe. The Amazon was still tied to a tree, but she had uprooted the thing and simply taken it with her.

"Super villain rule number 59," she muttered to herself. "When tying a superhero to something, always make sure it's strong enough to withstand their efforts to escape."

"Would you prefer we exchange witty banter and one of us makes the nearly inevitable 'got wood?' joke, or shall we skip right to the part where I defeat you despite not having the use of my arms?" Wonder Girl asked.

The Cheetah grimaced at the mention of that potential joke. "Let's just go to the part where you beat me up," she said.

"Very well."