Chapter 7

"Where are you going, Ed?"

Toni had just arrived home. She was blocking his path to the front door, and staring at his change of clothing, too.

"I never saw that green suit before... are you off somewhere special, without me?"

"Yes, I am!" he replied, as he noticed a change of expression on her face. She was looking at him feeling uneasy, like she had never seen that look in his eyes before, something was different about him...

"That's it?" she demanded, "You're not going to tell me more?"

"No," Ed replied, "Because I'm leaving and I'm not coming back."

She stared at him in disbelief.

"So you don't love me?"

Ed paused for thought.

"Let me see... yes, I do believe that would an be accurate statement. I never loved you! I have no intention of making a life with you! I'd say it's been fun but you're actually quite boring, I'd give your oral sex skills four out of ten and I'm genuinely surprised I never fell asleep while I was on top of you. Now get out of my way!"

Tears of hurt and anger filled her eyes.

"You bastard, you used me?"

She stepped closer, glaring at him as she continued to block his path. Ed considered putting his hands around her throat, or shoving her hard to the floor. He thought about the straight razor folded in his pocket:

No. There was no time for murder, then cleaning up a crime scene to be sure he left no prints behind. He had plans, and they were far too important to risk screwing up by killing his ex and risking a murder charge...

Ed smiled as his eyes danced with amusement.

"I'm sorry, I was kidding!"

"What?" she said in confusion.

He laughed.

"I'm actually going out because I have a job interview.. sorry for the bad joke about leaving you, I was nervous and didn't know what to say. I wanted to land the job and then tell you when I came home."

She was still confused, but now relieved, even though annoyance was clear in her tone as she spoke again.

"That wasn't funny!"

"I know, I'm sorry. And I have to go, I'll be late! I'll be back in a couple of hours... see you soon!"

He gave her a bright smile, then kissed her cheek and placed his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her aside. The sight of the front door had never looked so wonderful as he thought about his plans, this was the start of his journey back to Oswald...

"Good luck," he heard Toni say.

"I don't need your luck, believe me," he murmured, then he was gone out the door, he closed it behind him and walked away with a sly smile on his face. Toni would never know how fortunate she was' killing her would have been so easy – but he couldn't risk anything getting in the way of his plans for a wonderful future. That woman would never see him again - and would never know why he didn't return, and he really didn't care.

He was going straight over to the Cobblepot residence, because he had a brilliant plan that would set everything right...It had to work, that was all he thought as he made his way across town - it had to work because he couldn't live with the thought that Oswald's time could be short and so much time had been wasted – he needed to see him and make amends, more than that, he needed to be completely honest about the huge mistakes he had once made in the past. Back then he had pushed him aside. He regretted that day. So much needed to be put right...


Over at the Cobblepot residence, it had not been a good day. Oswald had woken up in pain and the pills had taken a while to kick in. He had got up, got dressed, then decided the rough start to the day had truly exhausted him, and he had made some calls and cancelled all plans and decided to stay home. Rose had planned to take his mother shopping, and it had taken much persuasion to get her out of the door because she had been so worried about him. He didn't want either of them to worry' his mother was ageing and Rose was pregnant, neither needed him to be a cause for concern.

As they left the house he felt relieved they had carried on with their plans – and thankful that the pain medication was still working. Lately it had taken longer to kick in and the thought that one day it could stop working completely terrified him. Until the truth had come out, he had carefully timed the doses so Rose had not realised he was taking pills – but now it didn't matter any more. In the beginning he had gone to great lengths to ensure no one realised he was sick, he had even fired the maid in case she had noticed something amiss. But now the cryogenics plan was in motion, he cared less about talk flying around Gotham that Penguin was dying. He still had a chance, and he was determined to take it when the time was right, his mind was made up that he was going to live and there could be no alternative.

When the buzzer sounded, he was downstairs in the front room. It sounded again and he got up stiffly, leaned heavy on his cane and the distance from the front room to the end of the hallway had never seemed so far before. As the buzzer went off for the third time, he answered the call.

"Rose, did you forget the gate key?"

"Oswald..." there was a pause, "It's me, it's Edward Nygma. I swear I haven't come here to cause more trouble... Please let me in. I just want to talk. I won't leave until I see you! I'm just going to stand here, and if the cops turn up, arrest me and take me back to Arkham, I'll still say it was worth the risk to speak to you!"

Ed sounded upset. Oswald felt a flicker of anger as he spoke into the intercom.

"Maybe I will call the cops... or maybe I'll rip the blade out of my cane and stab you in the neck. Which would you prefer?"

"What ever you think I deserve," replied Ed.

"Take your chance, maybe I'll kill you, maybe I won't. Perhaps you'll be back in Arkham by tonight," Oswald replied, and hit the button to open the main gates.


As he waited by the front door, Oswald felt shaken up. It was a shock to hear from Ed, even more of a shock to hear him so upset. He had never imagined after all the bad blood between them that Ed would be upset over the news of his illness. Ed was the very last person who he had imagined would care, but he knew him well enough to know he had not been faking his tearful voice. Oswald felt caught up in a dizzy mix of emotions as he waited for him to arrive at the door.

Suddenly he was there, in a dark green suit, just standing on the porch looking to the door as he anxiously waited. Oswald watched from behind the curtain, stood at the window next to the front door, making Ed wait more agonising minutes. Then he pressed the doorbell once and carried on waiting.

Memories flashed before Oswald's eyes as he unlocked the door:

Ed shooting him, the pain of the bullet, the icy cold of the river as he fell in...That hurt as much as the day he had revealed his feelings and Ed had coldly rejected him. Anger was building now, he hoped Ed was sorry, he wanted to make him sorry...

On the other side of the door, Ed stood there waiting, his heart raced as he wiped sweating palms on his suit and watched nervously as the door was unlocked. Then it opened sharply.

"What the hell do you want now, Ed?" Oswald said bitterly as he looked at him with cold anger in his gaze.

For a moment, Ed couldn't speak. He blinked away the sting of tears that hit his vision, taking in the sight of Oswald standing there in his fine suit, leaning on his cane, looking pale and crushingly tired.

"You look terrible..."

"Tell me something I don't know!" Oswald snapped, "I didn't think you'd have the nerve to show up here again after your pathetic little stunt with phone!What do you want now, did you come here to gloat over my sickness?"

"No! Of course not... and I'm sorry about the phone. That was spiteful and stupid and I regret it," Ed said as his voice trembled, "Oswald, I only came here to talk to you! Please let me in."

Oswald looked hard at him, considering his request.

"Give me a reason why I should trust you. Remember I'm not too weak to kill you, Ed."

"I'm not here to fight," he promised, then Ed opened up his jacket, "And I'm not armed... wait..." he remembered the folded straight razor in his pocket, took it out and laid it down on the porch, "I carry that for my protection only these days... I'll leave it outside."

Oswald was still regarding him coldly. He said nothing as he stepped back and opened the door wider, wordlessly inviting him inside.

"Thank you!" Ed breathed an audible sigh of relief, then he hurried inside quickly before Oswald changed his mind.


As they went through to the front room where a fire burned brightly to banish the chill, Oswald said nothing. One look at Ed told him his former friend was genuinely distressed – but there was so much that had passed between them, so much hatred, perhaps too much to ever forgive... Oswald sat down stiffly in a comfortable armchair near the fire, thankful to rest against its padded back, then as Ed stood before him, he placed his cane against the side of the chair, carefully gripping the penguin shaped handle, ready to pull out the hidden blade if Ed pushed his luck. He was still wondering if this was a trap. Even if it wasn't, he had much to say to the man who claimed to be sorry for the pain he had caused.

"I've made mistakes," Ed began, "I can't forget that I shot you. After that I popped pills so I could hallucinate and see you beside me even though I thought I'd killed you! I need it to not be true! I was angry about Isabella. But you tampered with her car, you didn't kill her with your bare hands! I don't even think I loved her... looking back I think she reminded me of Kristen, that was all it was...but she wasn't her."

"And you killed Kristen."

"Yes, I did," Ed said, nodding as he stifled a sob and blinked away tears, "I killed her...I almost killed you...I'm so sorry!"

Anger was flickering inside his heart alongside old emotions he had wished were dead, but memories were flooding his mind, if he was honest, getting over Ed had only been something that existed on the surface. He had spent many nights making love to his wife and on several occasions, thoughts of Ed had slipped into his mind. It didn't stop him loving Rose, it just meant he still loved Ed too. He loved him but that man had caused him so much pain...

"I gave you my heart and you threw it back in my face! You laughed at me!" Oswald said accusingly, "And yes, I tampered with Isabella's car – I was jealous! I just wanted her out of our way! What did I get for it? A bullet in my guts, shot and almost drowned! I'm glad I had Freeze put you on ice, you deserved it!"

Ed fell silent. Tears were still shining on his face, but he had pulled himself back from weeping. Of course Oswald was angry with him, he had every right to be.

"We've hurt each other," Ed replied, "And I'm thankful I came to my senses before it was too late."

"Too late for what?" Oswald demanded, "I have my wife and a child on the way – an heir to my empire. You had your chance with me and threw it away. You're standing there like I should forgive you, like because I'm sick you think I'm going to break and give in to your demands. Well no one breaks Penguin! It's not going to happen, because you shot me, you tried to kill me!"

Ed fell silent. Oswald was sitting silently now, regarding him with contempt.

"Nothing more to say, Ed? Apology not accepted! Weep for me when I'm gone. I want you to live with regret!"

Ed took in a gasp of air as suddenly it felt hard to breathe. Panic had almost overwhelmed him. This was not going to plan at all.

"Oh dear.." he whispered, "There's not even a riddle for this, there's nothing I can do or say..." he took another unsteady breath, then silently made a decision, briefly closing his eyes and nodding as he chose the only option left.

"Okay... okay, Oswald... you win," he said in a hushed voice as he looked into his eyes, "Like you once told me, Riddler only exists because of you. I don't expect you to call me by that name, I'm just Ed Nygma, a man full of regret..." his breathing shook as he stifled a sob, "I'm laying it aside... all I built up, all that I am, I'm casting it away along with my self respect and my pride. Please forgive me!"

What happened next was unexpected. Ed fell to his knees before Oswald, grabbed his hand then kissed the back of it.

"Please!" he said again, begging him as he knelt there, looking up into his startled eyes.

Oswald was stunned. As Ed let go of his hand he was still staring at him. He had never seen him so desperate. He had never imagined that man would fall to his knees and beg to anyone. As pain vaguely flickered through his bones, Oswald recalled he was soon due to take his medication. That was a stark reminder of how short time had become. There was still space in his heart for Ed, he knew it. But he didn't want Ed to know that yet.

"I have plenty of scars," Oswald said quietly, "But the one I hate the most is the one caused by the bullet you put in me."

"I regret that every day," he replied honestly, "I think about what I did and I hate myself for it."

"I'm glad about that!" Oswald said coldly. But as he looked down at Ed, kneeling before him with tears streaking his face, his heart was softening. He wanted to pull him into his arms and tell him to stop weeping, but he held back.

"I have a wife now, and she would never harm me. She's pregnant with my child. You knew this before you came here. You also know I don't have long to live and I'm going to be frozen for a very long time because it's my only hope of survival. Why would you come back now?"

"Because I love you."

Those words banished all hostility from his gaze as Oswald looked down at Ed, whose eyes reflected nothing but raw honesty. He felt stunned, his limited time left before uncertainty closed in had now filled with a new possibility.

"There was a time when I would have given anything to hear you say that, but now? It's too late...maybe if I wasn't sick, in time we could have worked something out... but I don't have the luxury of time."

Ed's tears were drying as he looked up at him.

"Just let me make it all up to you. Let me help you, I want to help you through this. Even just as a friend... Let me prove I mean what I say."

Oswald paused for thought. He kept his emotions firmly in check as he considered all the warring times that had passed between them, then he remembered his own past and how he had once been little more than a slave to Fish Mooney... Maybe it was time he got himself an umbrella boy...

He drew his pills from his pocket, then addressed Ed without making eye contact.

"The kitchen is at the end of the hall. I need to take my pills. Fetch me a glass of water."

Ed felt confused as he looked at Oswald, who was speaking coldly with no hint of forgiveness in his tone. He wouldn't even look him in the eye now... But hope was building in his heart.

"Yes, of course, what ever you want," he replied, then he got up from the floor and left the room.

While Ed was gone, Oswald sat there deep in thought as the firelight flickered and the room was silent. He didn't want Ed to leave. If he wanted to stay, he would have to serve him. He knew what he would say when Ed returned to the room...

"Oswald, I have your water."

Ed hurried over to his side and handed him the glass. He stood over him as he took his pills, then he handed the glass back to him.

"Put it back in the kitchen."

"Okay..."

As Ed left the room, he blinked away tears, feeling silently thankful that Oswald, although still cold towards him, was allowing him to stay around. He had decided he would do whatever he was told to do, it was a small price to pay for being close to him once more. He had never seen him so cold and commanding before, but he was sick and in pain and if he wanted a slave, Ed was willing to please. Even Riddler, his alter ego now firmly joined to his mind as they co existed seemed to agree, do anything to get close to Oswald, what ever it would take to stop the heartache and regret.

When Ed returned to the front room, Oswald was still sitting in that comfortable chair close to the fire. Ed stood there in the doorway, looking at him, saying nothing. Finally Oswald met his gaze, but only coldness reflected in his eyes.

"Get over here," he ordered, "Get back on your knees, I need your assistance."

Ed obeyed him without question, kneeling on the rug, looking up at him as Oswald looked down.

"I ache to my bones these days," he said, "Take off my shoe and rub my ankle."

Ed carefully untied the lace, then loosened it and slipped his shoe off, then he gently raised his foot on to his lap and pushed down his sock and started to rub carefully over old breaks that had left Oswald with a painful limp. Ed's touch was far more soothing than he expected. Oswald gave a sigh and leaned back in the chair, closing his eyes as the ache melted away under Ed's touch.

"You're very good at that... keep going."

Ed carried on with the gentle movement of his fingertips over the damaged ankle that caused Oswald so much difficulty. He heard him sigh deeply and glanced up to see him relaxed, with his eyes closed, clearly he was doing this right, it was bringing him a great deal of relief. Ed silently decided that this was surprisingly rewarding, he had the power to lift out at least a small amount of his pain, and it meant a lot to him to know that. As all trace of the nagging ache melted away, Oswald opened his eyes and looked down at Ed.

"You did well. Put my shoe back on."

Ed said nothing in reply, obeying his command as he carefully slipped his foot back into his shoe and tied up the shoe lace.

"I have decided there is a place for you in my life."

He was still kneeling. The hope that shone in his eyes was something even Ed could not fake as he met Oswald's gaze.

"Do you mean that?"

A slight smile played about his lips as he looked down at him.

"You can be my... assistant. My umbrella boy. Always by my side and at my command. Never again my equal. Don't think that will ever change, because you're right where you deserve to be."

"That's all I ask," Ed replied, "Just give me a chance to help you. I have no hidden motive, no ambitions for myself, not any more. I just want to be with you in any way that makes you happy."

"And you will be," Oswald replied.

"What about your mother and Rose?"

"I will explain in a way that makes them understand. I'm sick, they know I don't have long. No one will push you out, Ed."

"Thank you so much for this second chance!"

He hesitated for a moment, then rested his head on Oswald's lap.

"Okay, I'll let you do that," Oswald told him, shifting back slightly, then sitting forward to ensure Ed did not realise his touch had led to an unexpected erection. For now, he had to keep his distance, because he needed to set up everything the way he wanted it to be – Ed Nygma would never again have the upper hand in his life, he knew his time was running out and he wanted what could be his last days to be exactly as he wanted them to be – no one would control him, especially not Ed...

Then he realised Ed was quietly weeping. He placed his hand on his hair and gently stroked it, just once.

"You can cry if you want to, I'll allow that," Oswald said, "But you'd better pull yourself together because my wife and my mother will be back soon."

Ed wanted to stay with his head rested on Oswald's knees, but he heard what he said and at once raised his head, sat back and wiped his eyes.

"Yes, of course... I'm in control now."

"Good," Oswald replied, "because I'm going to explain some rules to you: I will allow you to stay here in a guest room. You will also eat alone in your room and my mother will not cook for you. I expect you to serve me in any way I demand. That is all I want from you, just your assistance."

Ed nodded.

"Yes, of course, Oswald...Can I ask you for one small favour?"

His gaze was still cold as he looked back at him.

"I'll probably refuse, but ask away."

Ed hesitated, he looked down at the floor, then slowly raised his head, meeting his gaze as he felt nervous, fearing his request might cause anger.

"Can I see that scar you hate so much? I know I hurt you, I just want to see what I did...I know I can never put that right, but I need to see the damage."

Oswald looked at him coldly, it was a struggle not to drop the act as image flashed through his mind: Opening up his shirt, exposing that scar, Ed kissing him there, on that old bullet wound that sat right above his belt, then pushing him down, commanding him to take him in his mouth...

The thought of Ed tending to the ache caused by his sudden and aching erection was almost enough to make him loose all control and let the fantasy happen.

But not yet.

Ed had to earn his place in his life, their friendship could never go back to the way it used to be. He was determined not to become the desperate man who would have done anything for Ed, ever again. This time, Ed would not cause him heartbreak, he would make sure of it.

"No, you can not see my scar," Oswald replied, and just then he heard a car pull up on the driveway outside, "Get up from the floor and dry your eyes. My family are back!"

Ed got up and wiped his eyes, then as Oswald grabbed his cane and struggled, rising from the chair with difficulty, he reached out to offer assistance, but Oswald pushed his hand away.

"I'm not helpless yet," he said sharply, "Wait here, do and say nothing, leave the talking to me."

Then he left the room, leaning hard on his cane as he made his way to the front door. Rose and his mother were back and he had much explaining to do...


"...So you see," said Oswald as he stood beside the fire and Rose and Gertrude looked on in stunned silence, "Ed is truly sorry and in light of my limited time left, I very much want him to be part of our lives. Mother, I know he's done wrong to me but I've hurt him too. I want to lay that to rest now. Rose...this matters to me. This is my final wish before my condition deteriorates and I commit myself to the freezing procedure. I don't know if I'll come through that. These could be my last days. I hope you will welcome Ed into our lives. He poses no threat and only wants to make amends."

As soon as they had arrived home, he had taken them both through to the front room where Ed was waiting. Much explaining had gone on. Both women were stunned by the news. As he finished speaking, Rose and Gertrude looked to Ed, who stood stiffly by the window, at a distance from them as he saw coldness in their eyes.

The thought struck Rose that Oswald was so damned good with his words it was easy to see how he had once been voted mayor of Gotham. He was persuasive – and although she had her doubts, one look at him was all she needed to be sharply reminded that her husband was right, he didn't have long left and they didn't know what the outcome would be. He needed to have life his way, doing whatever made him happy, whatever kept him strong enough to keep fighting. If he wanted Ed in his life, he would have Ed in his life...

"If he means that much to you," Rose said, "I'll agree to letting him stay," then she glanced at Ed, who met her gaze uncomfortably as he saw her hostile expression, "But if you harm my husband again," she warned, "I'll personally make sure you spend the rest of your days back in the asylum!"

"You will not have to do that, Rose," added Gertrude, looking to Ed with a vengeful glare, "If you ever harm my son I will kill you while you sleep, Mr Nygma!"

Ed stiffened as he looked into the eyes of Oswald's mother. There was a glint of crazy in those eyes, enough to confirm where Oswald got his darkness from. Yes, she really would do that. She meant it. That wasn't a threat, it was a promise...

"I swear to you I only have good intentions, Mrs Cobblepot."

"Kapelput!" she snapped in an icy tone, then she glanced at Oswald with a weary, disapproving look and left the room.

For a moment there was silence. Oswald looked worn out as he leaned on his cane and made his way over to Rose, then he turned his gaze to Ed, who was still standing alone on the other side of the room.

"Come over here and meet my wife," Oswald said.

Ed froze, not moving from where he stood at the window as he looked at Rose and wondered if more threats were about to come his way.

"Ed," Oswald repeated firmly, "Over here, now!"

He crossed the room and joined them.

"I really do have good intentions," he said again, "I love Oswald. I wish all of the bad stuff had never happened. I just want to put things right."

Rose slowly nodded. She had known all about Oswald's feelings for Nygma since that day by the river when he had told her about the past, about how he had loved Ed, how his heart had been broken by the loss of his friendship.

"I know," she said softly, "Before we were married, Oswald told me all about you. He loved you. He still loves you."

Oswald drew in a sharp breath.

"This isn't about love, Rose! Ed has to earn his forgiveness."

Rose looked from her husband to Ed, reading the signs clearly – Ed was heartbroken and willing to do anything to make amends. And as for Oswald, the fact that his time could be running out did nothing to stop his stubborn streak or his need to hold on to old resentments. He was determined to punish Ed for as long as he got satisfaction from causing him pain.

"Why don't you just forgive him?" Rose suggested, "We both love you. I knew you loved this man before I came along. Having both of us at your side could help you more than you realise, you might even live longer -"

"I'm perfectly happy to be in control of this situation my way, Rose," Oswald told her, "I admit we both hurt each other in the past, we did terrible things – but he has to understand his place in my life. You're my wife, you belong at my side..." his gaze was cold as he turned to Ed and his tone hardened, "And you, Edward Nygma, are here to serve me. You're just my umbrella boy. Get used to it!"