Sorry this is late. A bunch of family matters came up, and I was very much occupied throughout the day, forcing me to leave this chapter unfinished on the actual date of February 14th(but it can still technically be Valentine's Day, right?)
And yes, because it's literally the Love Holiday, this chapter is most likely much more romance than bromance. Don't worry, we'll be back to our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow.
Meredy and Mirajane really are evil little wizards, aren't they?
Takes place after Fairy Tail has gotten back together and Laxus is the new master and Crime Sorciere visits a lot and all that good stuff.
It was the end of February 14th at the guild, and Mirajane was looking at the clock.
10:00. She needed to go.
"Kinana?"
"Yeah?"
"Mind taking over for a bit? I have somewhere I need to be."
Kinana grinned and agreed, obviously assuming Mirajane had a date. She did, but it wasn't a romantic one…..
Slipping into a side door in the large new guild hall, Mirajane practically flew down several flights of stairs, before coming to a huge steel door with several locks on it.
'Now let's see…...the password…..Ah, there we go."
Entering in several secret passwords (read: ship names), she hurried into a large room with comfy chairs and tables, several pictures, maps, posters, charts, and pages covered in writing stuck on the walls, a gigantic lacrima screen, and a smoothie/donut machine (hey, shippers get hungry from all the fangirling).
Mira walked in, and paused for a second, squinting. There it was. A tuft of pink hair, a corner of navy fabric, and the curve of black earmuffs, peering out from behind a fluffy blue chair.
"Meredy, I see you."
The eighteen-year-old mage tumbled out from the chair, giggling. "How do you always see me?"
"You wear black earmuffs, a dark blue cloak, have pink hair, and hide behind the sky blue chair."
"Good point."
Both walked over to the swivel chairs positioned in front of the screen's dashboard. Mirajane clicked a few buttons, and the screen split into several pieces. A lever was pulled, and the screen filled with pictures, from the surveillance cameras the she-devil had surreptitiously placed around the guildhall and Magnolia town.
"Let's see if our efforts paid off. Who do you want to check up on first?"
"Hmmmm….let's try Erza and Jellal. I'm running out of blackmail material, especially after I made the mistake of teasing Cobra about Kinana. He won't tell me anything anymore."
"It's alright, Meredy. You're still learning the ways of matchmaking."
While Mirajane pulled up a file, Meredy jumped out of her chair and bowed. "Of course, senpai!"
File# 4
"This was a lovely collaborative effort. Unfortunately, the initial attempt to manipulate Erza was unsuccessful, as it was Valentine's Day and she knows me too well. Luckily, Special Operative Wendy was enlisted, and used her irresistible charms to convince Erza to take her on a picnic, and then promptly remembered she had to go help Chelia pick out a gift for Lyon, leaving Erza to enjoy herself. What did you do again?"
"The rest of Crime Sorciere helped me sneak attack Jellal, knock him out, drop him in the forest next to the designated spot, and use various potions to ensure he didn't wake up until the correct time."
As you can see, Mirajane and Meredy have much different methods of matchmaking. Clearly, there is a reason Meredy has much to learn.
"Well….ok. So Jellal sees Erza having a picnic and decides to say hi, and she drags him over to try the seventeen different kinds of cake in the picnic basket, and they spend the entire afternoon together."
"But they didn't kiss."
"No, they didn't."
"So it was a failure."
After crying for forty-six minutes, the two girls moved on.
File# 9
"Remind me to kill those two fanboys of Levy's for interfering. MY PLAN NEARLY WORKED!"
"You guilted Levy into telling Gajeel about what happened during the fight with Torafusa, right?"
"YES. And he was looked really confused and he [deleted][redacted] SMILED and was about to [removed] SAY something and then those two [unprintable][unmentionable][we didn't know that kind of word even existed] boys come running in with their gifts for Levy and RUINED THE [omitted] MOMENT! AND I AM GOING TO CHASE THEM DOWN AND I AM GOING TO-"
"Um, oh, uh,OH LOOK IT'S SPECIAL OPERATIVE HAPPY(happy get the hell down here!)"
"Oh, lovely! Any news on Natsu and Lucy?"
Both Happy and Meredy shivered and vowed to not bring up Gajeel or Levy (or heaven forbid Jet and Droy's) names again.
File# 2
"This operation was also, pardon my tone, a complete and utter failure."
"And why would that be?" asked Meredy and Mirajane in unison.
"Not only did Asuka not take the bait this time, but Natsu can't take a hint, Juvia nearly hung Lucy off the balcony before they even talked, the chocolates I gave to Natsu for 'whatever you want' got smashed when Gaj-"
"Who?"
"NO ONE NO ONE NO ONE uh anyway and Laxus electrocuted all of them for causing a disturbance." He showed them his singed wing. "I barely got away!"
"Ah well, Natsu may not be as dense as everyone thinks he is, but any romantic plan involving him was doomed to failure from the start. Who's next?"
From the depth of the Exceed and the Crime Sorciere mage's souls, a sigh of utter relief was heard.
File# 12
"Now this is the interesting one."
"Indeed. Indeed it is."
"In fact, I haven't even looked at it yet. What happens?"
"Don't know."
*sound of clicking play button as the screen whirs to life*
"Grey-sama?"
"Huh? Oh, hey Juvia."
"Juvia has a present for you."
Juvia hands Grey a heart-shaped box of chocolates. Predictably, they all have Juvia and Grey cuddling on top of them. Unpredictably, Juvia pulls out nothing else. Also unpredictably, Grey presses a beautiful ice necklace into Juvia's hand. (Juvia faints with excitement, along with Meredy, Mirajane, and Happy).
But they didn't kiss.
ANOTHER FAILURE.
File# 16
"I decided that Yukino would look cute with either of the Twin Dragonslayers, so I made a file for both of them and then set something up for both so tha- Meredy, why do you have that funny expression on your face?"
Happy looked quite pleased with the idea. True to Mira's words, Meredy looked a combination between horrified and scared out of her wits.
"Meredy- HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
Meredy had pushed Mirajane off the chair and was frantically erasing all of the data in the file. Her fingers flew over the keyboard as she destroyed any vestige of the file. Happy had obviously recognized the danger, as he had flown Mira high enough for just long enough for Meredy to finish deleting everything. Mirajane was screaming.
"NOOOOO WHYYY I'M GOING TO FIRE YOU FOREVER BOTH OF YOU WHY? WHY WOULD YOU-"
She stopped short on seeing the expression of pure terror on Meredy's face as she said, quietly and trembling, "Angel."
IN A CASTLE JUST THERE FOR PLOT PURPOSES
Sorano Aguria, aka Angel, cackled while her various Celestial Spirit spies crowded around her.
"Don't worry, Yukino. I will protect you from those evil demonic creatures, akin to Zeref himself. I WILL AVENGE YOU!"
Yeah, Angel might be good again, but that doesn't mean she lost all of her insanity. Coupled with the fact that she's guilty because she didn't protect her long-lost sister over the years and said sister hangs out with two very attractive teenage boys, no one will be able to protect the world from devastation (plus no people will be united ever again).
Also, I have this thing where I think Juvia will be less hyper-obsessive towards Grey after they travel together for an entire year. Might be nice.
Anyway, that's the chapter. Review, recommend, all that good stuff. Sayonara!
