A/N– Whoa! The response for the last chapter was so wonderful! I'm glad that you are all enjoying my story so much! Well, with the unfortunate exception of Sepirotho- Though, if you have accepted my invitation to stick around for a few more chapters before making your decision, thank you.
Oh, and for those of you who thought that Happosai was acting a little weird, that was just a little private talk between him and Ranma, he'll be back to his old ways as of this chapter.
Disclaimer time! I don't own nuttin', ya hear me copper? NUTTIN'!
-Chapter 7-
-Just Another Day in Nerima-
Nodoka Saotome sat down at her table, a nice cup of tea in hand, sighing in relief, having spent the entire day cleaning her house and puttering around in the garden. Taking a sip of her tea, she looked across to the room's mantle, where all of the photos that she had of her Ranma, when he was still a precious little boy, were framed. "Oh Ranma, where are you now?" She asked the pictures wistfully, a lone tear sliding from one eye. So caught as she was in her musings, Nodoka surprised when the telephone began to ring, letting out a small squeak of fright as she placed one hand over her rapidly beating heart. Giving herself a second to get over the shock, Nodoka got up and went over to the phone, answering it on the sixth ring. "Hello?" She asked, finally calming down fully.
"Hello, is this the Saotome residence?" A young, feminine voice asked from the other end.
Nodoka frowned slightly. "Yes, it is. May I ask who is speaking?" She asked in return.
"Why yes, I am Nurse Haruka, from Nerima General. Is this by chance Nodoka Saotome?" The woman, identified as Nurse Haruka asked.
Nodoka's frown deepened a bit more. "Yes, I am Nodoka Saotome. What can I do for you?"
"Why hello Mrs. Saotome!" The nurse's voice bubbled cheerily. "I am sorry to have taken so long to contact you, but it took us a while to find your home number- Apparently it had been misfiled by Mr. Saotome, but I apologize irregardless. Anyway, I am happy to inform you that your son, Ranma, has apparently made a full recovery, and is ready to be released from the hospital today!" She chirped.
Nodoka's eyes widened in shock as she gripped the phone tightly. "Something is wrong with my son? Is he alright?!" She asked frantically.
"Mrs. Saotome, is everything ok?" The nurses voice lost it's cheeriness, becoming concerned. "Didn't your husband inform you of the accident?"
"I haven't heard from Genma in almost ten years. Please, what happened to Ranma?" Nodoka begged, her knuckles white with tension.
"Well, Ranma was involved in a terrible accident a few days ago." The nurse informed, troubled that the nice young man's mother hadn't been told. "I don't know all of the details, but apparently something happened, and Ranma's fiancee, Akane Tendo, was dropped from high up by a tornado or something, and Ranma, who was in the same position that she was, decided , in a romantically heroic act, decided to protect her by putting himself in harms way rather than let her be hurt, and took the full brunt of their fall. He was hurt badly, shattering quite a few bones and receiving massive internal damage, and for a while the doctors thought he was going to pass away, and he almost did, but he managed to pull though, and now he's awake, and miraculously enough, is fully healed! The doctors have already agreed to release him after a few more tests, so if you would like to come pick him up, now is the perfect time." She went on to inform Nodoka.
Nodoka felt the blood rush from her face as she held one hand up to cover her mouth. "H-how long ago was he hurt?" She asked.
"It was... four days ago." Haruka told her.
"How can he possibly be fully healed?!" Nodoka gasped in shock.
The nurse chuckled from the other end. "We were all just as shocked, let me tell you! But apparently, it has something to do with... ki, I think he said?"
Nodoka collapsed to her knees. "I'll be over as soon as I can!" She exclaimed hurriedly.
"Ok then, goodbye Mrs. Saotome!" The nurse replied, not realizing that Nodoka had simply dropped the phone and had already grabbed her purse and was rushing for the door.
Tataewaki Kuno, Noble Samurai, defender of justice and young beautiful maidens everywhere, sighed morosely as he sat on a cushion in the family room, unable to go into his own chambers, where one of his faithful servants were removing all of the pictures of... Ranma Saotome. He still was finding it hard to believe that the fiery red-headed girl that he had fallen so hard for was in fact his nemesis and proclaimed greatest rival, Ranma. It still made him ill just to think about it, and there was no way that he could face Ranma to confront the issue right now, not with the shame he was feeling. With a heavy sigh, he took a sip of the relaxing herbal tea that he'd had prepared, dreading what he knew he had to do. "Sasuke!" The Heir to the Kuno estates called out resignedly.
Without warning, a diminutive man dressed in ninja garb appeared behind Kuno, kneeling with his head bowed. "You called master?" He asked.
Kuno nodded, not bothering to turn to speak to his servant. "Please go fetch my sister for me, I have news of the upmost importance to tell her." He ordered.
"Yes sir!" Saskue saluted, disappearing in a flash.
A few moments later, Kodachi walked into the room, dressed in her black leotard as she approached her brother, her nose held haughtily in the air. "You called, dearest brother?" She asked in a falsely sweet voice, perturbed that her training had been interrupted.
Kuno nodded. "Yes, I have something to tell you. You may wish to sit down, because what I have learned is most shocking." He said gravely, gesturing to a cushion in front of himself.
"What is it brother?" Kodachi asked as she sank down gracefully, reaching one hand out to rest on her brother's knee, conveniently passing her hand above his tea-cup.
"Well, it is about Ranma Saotome..." Kuno started, reaching for his tea.
"AHHH! It feels good ta finally be outta that place!" Ranma exclaimed as he stretched his arms above his head while he plodded along at an easy pace on a chainlink fence.
Down on the sidewalk beside her fiancé, Akane couldn't help but giggle a little at his antics, covering her mouth with one hand. What was that all about?" She asked, looking up at Ranma.
Ranma shuddered, remembering the battery of tests that Dr. Hojo had put him through before Akane got back.
-Flashback-
Ranma sat on an observation table, clearly uncomfortable as he was, at the moment, completely naked, and the same set of nurses kept passing by the room, obviously ogling him and whispering things to each other that was just loud enough for Ranma to hear and left the poor teen continuously blushing. Off to one side, completely oblivious, Dr. Tofu and Dr. Hojo were pouring over Ranma's charts and several other papers detailing the conclusions of various tests, before looking up again at the x-rays of Ranma's skeletal structure, which was shown to be almost perfectly healed, mere ghosts of the breaks still barely visible, and even those could be seen to be fading from one picture to the next. "Ummm... Doc? Can I put some clothes on?" Ranma asked hopefully after the gaggle of giggling nurses passed by the door for the sixth time.
Completely ignoring Ranma's request, Dr. Hojo kept flipping through the charts, slowly shaking his head in disbelief, as if he were expecting for the results to magically change before his eyes. "It shouldn't be possible, it goes against everything we know about modern medicine..." He said quietly.
Dr. Tofu grinned. "And yet, the proof is right in front of your eyes." He replied as he tapped the x-rays. Wordlessly, Dr. Hojo began to grip the results, twisting them. "Hojo?" Tofu asked, placing a concerned hand on his friend's shoulder.
Without warning, Hojo threw his hands into the air, cackling maniacally as the papers fluttered down around him. "TOFU! Do you know what this means?!" He exclaimed, grabbing Dr. Tofu by the shoulders and shaking him slightly.
"Ummm... No?" Tofu replied confusedly, adjusting his glasses while Ranma stared at the two from his spot on the table.
Hojo started laughing again, letting go of Tofu's shoulders and rubbing his hands together, a gleam in his eyes. "Why, with this boy's genetic make-up, the possibilities are endless!" He cheered.
"Nani?!" Both Ranma and Tofu exclaimed together, confused, and a little disturbed by the maniacal gleam in Hojo's eyes.
"Indeed!" Hojo went on. "If we were to harvest his genes, we could create a superior type of human! Greater than a normal man in every way! We could lead the world into a new age of prosperity with the super-human gene! And no one would dare oppose us, because we could have an army that would be superior to any other in the world in every single way! If they get shot or lose a limb? Not a problem! They'll regenerate any damage in no time! They'll be strong enough to destroy tanks bare-handed, and other troops won't stand a chance! They'll be the perfect soldiers! In fact, that's what we can call them- SOLDIERs!" He cackled, visions of a perfect world dancing through his head.
"Uhhh... I think it might be best if I get outta here doc." Ranma dead-panned, sweat-dropping.
"Indeed." Dr. Tofu replied, one eyebrow twitching as Hojo continued to rant, completely oblivious to the two. "Well come then Ranma, I believe that a change of clothes was already brought for you. I'll make sure that you are released right away."
With visible relief, Ranma hopped off the table, shrugging on his hospital gown and making sure it was securely closed before following Dr. Tofu out the door.
A few minutes later, back in his own room, Ranma was sighing in relief as he finished garbing himself. "Finally!" He exclaimed, heading for the door. Only to find Akane standing there, about to open the door when he opened it himself. "Akane!" Ranma exclaimed, surprised.
"Ranma!" Akane yelled at the same time, just as surprised as her fiancee. Taking a second to calm herself down, Akane smiled. "Are you ready to go? Dr. Tofu said that he'd already filled out the paper work and you can go at any time." She said.
Ranma grinned in relief. "Yeah, lets get outta here!" He exclaimed, grabbing Akane by the hand and rushing for the elevator, glancing around to make sure Dr. Hojo wasn't anywhere to be seen.
As the two cleared the elevator doors on the ground floor, Ranma eagerly tugged on Akane's hand, heading for the front doors. "Come back soon honey buns!" One nurse called out cheekily, while the others with her laughed.
Before Akane could ask, Ranma sprinted out the doors and quickly fled the parking lot, hopping up onto the chainlink fence that he was now walking on.
-end flashback-
Ranma shuddered at the memory. "Trust me Akane, ya REALLY don't wanna know." He replied, taking a deep breath.
Akane huffed, slightly annoyed. Was it really that hard for him to answer a simple question? And what were those nurses yelling about anyway? "Whatever." She replied, looking away."So, are you ready to go home? Kasumi is making a big meal, with a bunch of your favorites."
Ranma looked down at Akane, scratching the bridge of his nose as he stopped and crouched down. "Actually, I was wonderin' somethin'..." He replied.
Akane looked up at Ranma, tilting her head to one side. "What is it?" She asked, confused.
"Well..." Ranma looked away, rubbing the back of his head. "I was wonderin' if... y'know, as thanks for everything, ya'd like ta go get some ice cream? My treat?" He offered, a small blush spreading across his face.
Akane blinked, then blinked again, trying to process the information. Did Ranma just ask her out on a date? And offer to pay?! Looking a little closer at his face, Akane realized that he was being sincere!
"What?" Ranma grumbled, embarrassed.
"Sure Ranma, I'd love to!" Akane beamed, her wide smile lighting up her face, causing Ranma to blush a bit more as he leapt off of the fence and landed lightly beside her.
Before the two could start for the ice cream parlor though, Happosai rounded a corner, spotting his pupil. "Hey!" He called out, waving as he hopped over to them, landing on the fence.
"Old man?" Ranma blinked a few times, confused.
"And what are you doing here?" Akane asked dangerously, her aura flickering to life as she glared at the Grandmaster, fearing that her date with Ranma would be ruined before it could begin.
Happosai pulled his pipe and struck it up, puffing a few times. "Why, I'm just taking a stroll, dear Akane!" He replied. "Though, since I've found the two of you, there is one thing..." He trailed off.
"Really? What is it old man?" Ranma asked, confused, only to find himself suddenly drenched without warning, instantly changing genders.
"SWEETO!" Happosai crowed happily, throwing away the pail he'd pulled from subspace and leaping forward, glomping onto Ranma's breasts and nuzzling in with a sigh of contentment. "Oh wonderful gifts from the Kami, how I've missed you two!" He went on, rubbing his face against them.
"GAH! YOU OLD LECH!" Ranma screamed, her high soprano voice echoing as she called forth all of her feminine fury and brutally slapped the old man down off of her chest.
"Wha ha ha ha! You call that a slap? I've felt babies hit harder than that!" Happosai crowed, bouncing off of the ground and landing in a ready stance a few yards away.
"'wha ha ha ha? Wha ha ha ha?! I'LL WHA HA HA HA YOU YA DAMN PERVERTED GNOME!" Ranma roared, her aura flaring to life around her. "IRON BODY!" Ranma screamed, her aura beginning to pull in and condense into a visible blue sheet before sinking into her body, which suddenly strained taut with the tension running through it. "I'm gonna pound ya into a pervert pancake!" She charged towards Happosai, swinging a punch that he caught, though his eyes widened at the strength behind the blow, which was around a quarter of Ranma's normal strength before he'd been hit with the ultimate weakness technique.
"Impressive boy! It seems that you did more than just talk to your grandfather in Heaven!" Happosai remarked, instantly transferring the force, using it to swing Ranma around into a wall, where she made a slight impression in the brick. "Are you sure you should be using that so soon after getting out of the hospital though? Surely that coot told you the drawbacks to that move." Having said his peace, Happosai puffed on his pipe, watching as Ranma peeled away from the wall before falling over.
"Happosai you pervert!" Akane yelled, stepping up behind the gnome and punting him into LEO before he could react. "I swear, he never stops!" She huffed, walking over to Ranma and helping her to her feet. "Are you alright Ranma?" Akane asked, a small bit of concern in her voice.
Ranma grinned ruefully. "Sorry 'bout that Akane, I didn't expect the old pervert ta pull anything like that this soon. Thanks for kickin' his ass." She said gratefully.
Akane beamed at the praise. "It's no problem Ranma. Are you still up for ice cream?" She asked hopefully.
Ranma looked down at her body. "Like this?" She asked, seeing Akane's hesitant, hopeful nod. "I'm always up for ice cream!" She exclaimed, marching in the direction of the ice cream parlor.
"You baka." Akane giggled, following alongside Ranma, a smile on her face.
A few moments later, a cab pulled up to the hospital and Nodoka leapt out, tossing some money back at the driver before rushing up the steps and bursting through the front doors, making a bee-line fore the front desk. "Please, what room is my son Ranma in?!" She asked frantically.
The nurse looked up, surprised. "Mrs. Saotome?" She asked.
Nodoka nodded. "Yes, that is me. Are you the nurse that I spoke to on the phone.?" She asked.
Haruka nodded. "Yeah, that was me! Hold on a sec..." She began to flip through a chart, only to start in surprise. "Nani?!" She exclaimed. "Karin, when did Dr. Tofu sign Ranma Saotome out?!" She asked a near-by nurse.
Karin, the nurse in question, looked up from her work. "Oh, that young guy with the REALLY cute butt and great body? I think Doc Tofu signed him out while you were on break." She replied.
Haruka's eyebrow twitched. "Were you checking out patient Saotome while he was being examined?" She asked heatedly.
Karin grinned embarrassedly, rubbing the back of her head. "Weeell... Me and a few of the other nurses miiight have... 'checked'... in on them when he was being examined." She admitted sheepishly.
"Oh, you mean that guy with the cute butt?" Another of the nurses, who had been pouring over some charts asked, looking up.
Haruka slapped herself on the forehead, groaning at the blatant unprofessionalism that her coworkers were showing. "I'm REALLY sorry about this Mrs. Saotome. If it's any help, I can take you to Dr. Tofu, who knows your son really well- Maybe he can tell you where he's at." She offered.
"That would be nice, thank you." Nodoka nodded, following behind Haruka as they set off in search of Tofu. 'Oh my, Ranma must be so manly to get so many nurses so hot and bothered.' She thought to herself as they walked through the halls.
"ACHOO!" Ranma suddenly sneezed loudly, startling everyone around her and almost dropping her ice cream.
"Ranma! Are you alright?" Akane asked, setting her own sundae down on the table they'd chosen.
"Yeah." Ranma nodded, wiping her nose as she set her ice cream down and sat down in the seat. "Someone must be talkin' about me, and it'd better not be that pervert over there." She growled, throwing a heated glare at the server.
Akane giggled as she scooped out a spoonful of ice cream. "Yeah, but at least we got an extra scoop for free!" She replied with a laugh at her fiancé turned fiancee's predicament.
"Yeah, but he kept lookin' at my boobs!" Ranma growled, feeling disgusted.
Akane snickered again. "Just eat your ice cream." She replied.
Ranma grumbled some more, but dug in without any more protest, enjoying her frozen treat despite her annoyance.
"Ahhh, that was good!" Ranma exclaimed happily, walking out of the shop, her anger forgotten.
"Yeah, thanks for the ice cream Ranma!" Akane replied happily as she stepped out onto the sidewalk.
Ranma grinned in return. "Ah, except for that perv, it wasn't a problem Akane." She replied. "So, think we should be-" Suddenly she stopped, freezing solid as a familiar, maniacal laugh echoed through the area. "Oh no." She groaned, palming her face.
"Kunos!" Akane hissed as Kodachi landed on the sidewalk in front of them, Kuno settling down just behind her with a thump, tied up in the ribbon that Kodachi was holding, his arms and legs crossed as he observed the scene cooly.
"Hey Kuno, what're you doin' back there?!" Ranma called out, looking at the tied-up kendoist.
Kuno turned his gaze to Ranma, then looked away, pained. "Paralysis powder." He managed to croak out.
Kodachi snapped her ribbon loose. "Brother dearest told me something most unbelievable, and I had to come see for myself!" She exclaimed, snapping her ribbon towards Ranma, who kicked a trash can in the way, stopping it. "Oh yeah, what's that?" She asked, feeling nervous.
Kodachi's eyes narrowed. "That you, pig-tailed girl, are in fact my Ranma darling!" She yelled, snapping her ribbon again, catching hold of a hot water kettle that she'd set in her brother's lap earlier, ignoring his whimpers of pain. Dashing some of the water, her eyes widened as she watched the transformation happen, and Ranma became male again. "So it's true?!" She gasped, covering her mouth.
Ranma scratched the back of his head as Kodachi grabbed a pail of cold water and, putting her hand on his chest, poured some over him, triggering his transformation again. "Yeah, sorry 'bout this." She said sheepishly as Kodachi then poured some more hot water on her, transforming her into a guy again.
"Kodachi?" Akane asked, a little worried, as Kodachi hung her head. Stepping forward, she placed her hand on the slightly smaller girl's shoulder. "Are you alright?"
Suddenly, Kodachi's head snapped back up, and she started to laugh, scaring both Ranma and Akane, who jumped back. "Oh joyful day of days!" Kodachi sang, spinning around. "Truly Ranma is the one for me, he can satisfy all of my needs!" She exclaimed, stopping and pointing at Ranma. "Oh Ranma darling! Who knew that you would be not only the man for me, but the woman for me as well?!" She asked, snapping her ribbon back, ensnaring her brother. "Fear not, my beloved pig-tailed man-goddess! I shall return when I am prepared, and claim you for my own!" With another laugh, she sprang away, pulling her brother behind her as she departed, leaving a trail of black rose petals in her wake.
"I'm going to be siiick!" Kuno wailed as he and his sister disappeared in the distance.
Akane and Ranma were both sweat-dropping as the duo disappeared. "Oh..." Akane started.
"...Damn..." Ranma finished, feeling dread tickle up and down his spine.
"... Lets just forget that this happened, and go home, where Kasumi has a nice, big, hot meal waiting for us." Akane suggested, getting a mute nod from Ranma.
Quickly the two made their way home, remembering Kodachi's last words with shudders. "We're home!" Ranma called out as they entered the front door, swapping their shoes out for house slippers. Stepping up, Ranma made his way for the family room, opening the door and coming face to face with an older woman wearing a traditional kimono, her face framed with auburn hair. "Oh! Excuse me!" Ranma exclaimed, seeing the shocked expression on the woman's face, as well as Genma, in his cursed form, huddling in a corner, shaking in terror.
Nodoka, her mind reeling in shock, looked Ranma up and down once before flinging her arms around his neck in a tight hug. "Oh, Ranma! My son!" She cried out happily, sobbing into his chest.
"Muh-mom?!" Ranma gasped in surprise, his mind threatening to shut down as Akane stood just behind him, her eyes wide.
"Oh my." Kasumi said, covering her mouth with one hand.
"You can say that again." Soun replied mildly, sipping some tea.
Nabiki smirked. "Just another day in Nerima." She said.
-TBC-
A/N– Uh-oh! Kodachi's on the loose, and Ranma just met his mother! Tell me what you think please!
